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Basement Creature's Daily Journal!

Snw_bc

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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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Hello there Game Quitters,

I'm here because gaming is and has always been a serious problem of mine. When I look back ten years from now is when I can see my first flags of addiction and that was when my parents had to hide my keyboard, drive me to school, search the house in case I would hide just to be able to game when they had left for work. I am now 25 years old and in the same situation except I've flunked my studies more than I can count on both hands and will probably do the same again unless I do something. That's why I checked out google for solid advice on how to stop and found this 90 day detox. I will keep regular updates and maybe share something on my new hobbies as time goes by. I've got so many hobbies to choose from but I figured painting or drawing would be a nice place to start but I can't do that for 12 hours a day now can I? We'll have to see what else I find!

 

Like I mentioned on the 90 day detox video but deleted shortly after (because I showed the video to one of my friends who also is an addict) this is my current sad state which I will be sure to update! 25 years old, I live in my parents basement, I eat anti-depressants/anxiety pills, weigh 45 kilograms, sit in front of my comp at least 10-12 hours a day, watch porn at least once a day, antisocial (even with family and friends). I feel embarrassed by just typing it but it's the truth and shit has to stop. I guess we'll see if gaming actually ruined a good chunk of my life or if there's something hidden, I hear porn should have the same effects too so I will be #nofapping for at least 90 days too. Tonight (4/11/2016) I delete everything game related and :$ related, TONIGHT I DINE IN CELEBACY! 

 

Fun fact, when I was 15 years old I crawled into my parents bedroom sneaking like a ninja, to shed some extra light to why I would do such a thing it was because my mother and my father had decided that my gaming was interfering with my studies so they had taken my keyboard and put it under their bed. Little did they know I was a sneaky devil and knew very well where they hid the keyboard, I had in fact known since the day they started take it away from me a year earlier. Anyways, so I was sneaking like a spider getting closer to the keyboard right and as soon as I'm stretching for the keyboard my dad rises up from his bed fast like a viper and sees me, we were both quiet, I slowly crawled backwards out of the room and we never spoke about it. #Feelsbadman

I don't believe in gradually decreasing my game hours, I am really motivated to stop now and if I lose my motivation I'll talk myself into gradually increasing my game time again. I know I'll lose my motivation soon so I'll have to prepare for the worst. I haven't got any money for the programs at the moment, being unemployed my entire life hasn't really helped my bank account balance and my parents trust me as much they would the local crackhead so I'll wing it and maybe later get myself a long due copy if not only because of the forum. I know I can make silly jokes at times if you haven't noticed that already but it's just me avoiding some of the harshness of my reality so don't take anything the wrong way if I happen to step on your toes. 

Hobbies I have scheduled:

  • Painting, I've read though that drawing is a good basic for painting and much cheaper so I will definitely check that out, sticking to painting for now. 
  • Walking if you could call it a hobby, but I have scheduled it four times a day, maybe it'll transition into running later. :S

Hobbies I am trying to pick up:

  • Learning Russian
  • Running
  • Programming and/or Environmental design
  • Vlogging/Blogging (to help staying motivated)

That'll be enough for now, I don't want to substitute the gaming with excessive surfing which I've also done in the past, thanks for your time and good luck yourself!

 

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WorkInProgress Contributor

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Hi Snw,

Welcome to the forum! We are here to help. I have finished my detox soon and I must say that it helped me a lot with my studies and relationships. The key (especially at the start) is to use your motivation in a way that you create structures which help you to achieve your goals. I.e. you delete your games start a journal routine here and maybe search an accountability partner. In this case you are ready if your motivation  decreases and reach your goals anyway. I know out of personal experience that motivation is a feeble thing, which can't be relied up on. The good news are: You don't have to if you are smart enough in your planning.

Thanks for sharing your journal. It will surely help other people who are in a similar situation.

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Cam Adair Enthusiast

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Hey! Welcome to the forum! Although it can be tough to realize you're in this position - it's a turning point for you just like it was for me and just like it is for many others here. The good news is that you can now start changing your situation and a few years from now you'll look back and be proud of how much progress you've made. It happens one day at a time. Keep posting here in your journal and you'll get there, trust me. :)

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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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Hi Snw,

Welcome to the forum! We are here to help. I have finished my detox soon and I must say that it helped me a lot with my studies and relationships. The key (especially at the start) is to use your motivation in a way that you create structures which help you to achieve your goals. I.e. you delete your games start a journal routine here and maybe search an accountability partner. In this case you are ready if your motivation  decreases and reach your goals anyway. I know out of personal experience that motivation is a feeble thing, which can't be relied up on. The good news are: You don't have to if you are smart enough in your planning.

Thanks for sharing your journal. It will surely help other people who are in a similar situation.

Hey! Welcome to the forum! Although it can be tough to realize you're in this position - it's a turning point for you just like it was for me and just like it is for many others here. The good news is that you can now start changing your situation and a few years from now you'll look back and be proud of how much progress you've made. It happens one day at a time. Keep posting here in your journal and you'll get there, trust me. :)

Thank you guys for the hearty welcome and support, I'll be sure to update my progress whenever I can and share my advice for what it's worth to anyone who needs help. I'm from Sweden by the way and most of my English is grabbed from games so don't be alarmed by my funky twists and turns. Not that being Swedish has anything to do with funky English but, yeah you understand I guess. I'm going to the Red Cross to hoard some Painting supplies if there are any and maybe something about learning any language but I'm pretty set on Russian. Thanks again! ^_^

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Falky Newbie

Falky

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Welcome friend and you're definitely in the right place! Take note of what Cam and WorkInProgress said as that's some fantastic advice! My personal advice is to start straight away on improving yourself and it seems you have great ideas on to do that!

I'm learning Spanish at the moment and this site is fantastic, check it out for your Russian :)

http://www.memrise.com/courses/english/russian/

All the best :)

 

 

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AJ_Manley Newbie

AJ_Manley

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Hey man great to see you on here. Can't recommend this forum enough. There are lots of challenges you will face as you go though this process but taking it one day at a time and realising your strengths and weaknesses will make a big difference. I wish you luck :D 

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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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Welcome friend and you're definitely in the right place! Take note of what Cam and WorkInProgress said as that's some fantastic advice! My personal advice is to start straight away on improving yourself and it seems you have great ideas on to do that!

I'm learning Spanish at the moment and this site is fantastic, check it out for your Russian :)

http://www.memrise.com/courses/english/russian/

All the best :)

 

 

I most certainly will and thank you, yeah I've given it some thought :P,  I will be sure to check that website out

Hello Snwbc! Great to see your self-awareness in this situation! Some good hobbies I'd recommend are reading and doing some form of exercise. Russian is a great choice btw! Русски язык очень хорошо!

Hey and thanks for your support, It's mostly because I've tried and failed so many times before. Yeah I tried reading a book a week ago and that is partially why I'm here, I can't enjoy books anymore but it's definitely a habit I'm going to pick up. Yeah Russian feels powerful and has a completely different alphabet which will make things harder.

Hey man great to see you on here. Can't recommend this forum enough. There are lots of challenges you will face as you go though this process but taking it one day at a time and realising your strengths and weaknesses will make a big difference. I wish you luck :D 

Hey, yeah I figured it'd be a good place to start over again. Been trying so many times to no avail but guess I've got to be more engaged not filling my gaming time up with movies and all that jazz. Thanks for the support!

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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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So today I've been busy like a crazy person to try and substitute all the time I have spent gaming and its tough! I've noticed that my patience for everyday stuff is really not there anymore. Tried reading a book and brain was like NOPE NOPE NOPE, then I sat down and painted my first oil painting, apparently you need to wait for the paint to dry after you've made your first layer but my patience wasn't there so I ended up with a smudged pirate lady with a black long object (which was supposed to be a pistol) sticking out of her chest. I was happy with the outcome though I'll see if I can share this masterpiece in an edit later. 

I went for 3 walks total today and let me tell you, when I meet people on the street my eyes go like into their souls then back down on the asphalt then back, down, back, down, back down and when they pass me I was like "HEEEEEEEY". Awkward yeah sure and it was torture xD. Also found some books and paint on a nearby thrift shop(?) which was awesome because I could sit down and paint after my first walk. After the painting was "done" I still had a few hours left before I was going to start working on the computer so I baked a spongecake which ended up okay I guess, meanwhile that was in the oven I went for another walk, this time was less awkward. Watched a documentary on Donald Trump for president or something like that but I was supposed to work so I kind of failed on that one I guess, even though technically it's not a video game I still feel like watching youtube is cheating :|. I've spent the rest of my time learning how to develop in UE4... I've got mixed feelings on this one too but so far it's been nothing what I expected. I will try and get something more social when I've stretched my social skills a bit. So I was going to reward myself with a movie but the time here now is like 00:48 so I better get to bed and do some reading.

Pictures of the day:

image.jpgimage.jpg

I call her the pizzaladypirate! because of pizza!

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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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Not going to lie, today went smooth and I went for my walks and even sat down painting for at least four hours straight(not recommending this one xD). Everything went perfect until I was going to sit down and work on my C++ for UE4. Now I've been in front of youtube for at least 5 hours straight watching omegle pranks. Bleh, wasn't really enjoying myself either being a procrastinator and all. I'll have to regroup and set down another plan of action to get rid of these terries tomorrow. Gosh I even procrastinated this post how lame, anyways good night!

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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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Today I've been busy and managing my daily goals like a champ, I spent about two hours finishing up my painting from yesterday and I'm really liking it. Just went for two walks so I'll probably go for one 00:00 just to make it nearly there. Also been working on my UE4 scripting and it's frustrating to say the least, I guess it's like that when you're first introduced to all these shiny levers and buttons at the chocolate factory. You really don't know what to do so following some really boring tutorials will surely pave my way to success :D. Good night!

Pic of the day:

 

image.jpg
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Snw_bc Newbie

Snw_bc

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Alright after getting stuck in front of a movie last night made me go to sleep around 3:00 which kind of sucks because I then woke up three hours later and couldn't get back to sleep. Started another painting, this time of a thupertherial knight. I'm getting these short bursts of "Oh gosh I'd love to play this particular game right now", starting to feel more depressed and everything just seems shit but I'm soldiering onward. I heard sugar should be negative in a similar way so I decided I'd stop that shit too and with that coffee because whenever I have coffee I want a cracker or a piece of chocolate. Damn habits, glad I don't smoke though... THINGS COULD BE WORSE! :/ I also realized google offers excel so I've made myself a worksheet on when to do what kind of stuff. It's not really complete as I've just copy pasted three things I should do every day of the week so far xD. Also thinking about looking up an art circle to get some more "accountability". Anyways as I haven't really slept that much I'm going to chill, watch a movie and crash. Have a good one guys and thanks for being awesome quitters! Cheers!

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