BooksandTrees

@GrainSiloEnthusiastI ordered a few lego mini figures this week to go with my future builds. I'm excited. I got some different batman ones. Did you know they make his helmet in all colors? I got one of every color except purple because that's wicked expensive for some reason lol. Others are 2 dollars and purple is 700 dollars.

Good job being aware of this. Maybe there's some sort of control you're looking to have on something and maybe there's a better outlet.

What did you learn?

It was dynamic. It felt like I wasn't just doing isolated exercises and going through the motions. It's very involved and feels like an actual hobby or activity or dance.

I did pilates today. Was really nice and a ton of fun. If you get bored with working out this might be a fun thing to try.

I think being able to focus our addictive intensity and interest in hourly or bi hourly segments can really help. I work on 5 to 10 projects per week at work and I thrive on that now. It's created balance and now I'm getting better at playing tthe drums, reading, writing, and drawing for short segments now. Thanks and I'm glad your house project is running too. I am in a similar situation with my mom's house so I understand the politics involved lol. I wonder if you can seek out a mentor to review your out of class commitments and provide feedback. My company let's me choose a mentor and I can go over stuff once a month to get my questions answered. Maybe you could see if that's at your place too.

You got this. It really helps.

It's good you recognized this. It's ok that you watched porn. It's tough to find a solution. I realized that I needed comfort in order to relax and now I can relax with my wife on the couch. Just that alone cut my porn usage by like 80%. I find that I only watch it now when I'm too stressed to do anything and need an immediate release before anything. But that's rare. I think I've gone from 3 times a day to 2 times a week.

The house projects are good. We finished all major upgrades and can now focus on smaller things that aren't liabilities to the house. This is a huge relief. I think it's interesting you're doing this with your family member before your own place. I remember doing that with my family and found more pleasure doing my home with my wife. I'd include that time you spend outside of work in your review with your manager. See if that is normal or not. You might realize other teachers do more than that or others do way less. Might be a good experience.

Great approach. It's just cool seeing how much we can do in short periods of time. I think this is way better and healthier than gaming life.

This weekend has been great. I wrote for an hour and played the drums for about an hour. I've done yoga each day and cleaned the house a bit. Doing some meal prep soon and I also found time for multiple naps and relax time with my wife. I was getting frustrated again that I want productive in my mind, but I reread the conversation we've been having here the past few weeks and I think it's important. This was the first time I played the drums in months and the most productive week in writing and exercise I've had in weeks. So I'm happy about this. I'm officially over a third of the way done with my draft. I decided that when I finish the draft and work on the first revision, I'll make a website and start my marketing plan. My goal is to build momentum up until release day and sell the book with some people interested in it.

This is something to think about every time. I've learned that I enjoy just sitting on the couch with my wife and relaxing. I read or write or we watch TV. I used to game all night. You're going to realize what gives you satisfaction and what you've been yearning for in life. Try thinking about what gaming brought you. Success? Independence? Progress? Purpose? What is missing from your life?

Huge improvement to my life was quitting social media. My mood and temper have greatly improved.

I've been building legos too !

I relate to this. If my wife isn't home and I'm not working my actual job, I feel the effects of loneliness and I start to experience cravings for activities that I don't find healthy. It might be eating junk food when I'm not actually hungry or porn or YouTube for a while. I've gotten better with it over the months, but certain days can still be difficult and it just puts a spotlight on one of my biggest emotional triggers, which is loneliness. Good job being aware of this.

The daily grind can really be exhausting but through time we start to find what our comfort level is with amount of hours and focus level during that time. I also think a great deal of my frustration is thinking I'll be as productive outside of work as I am at work. It's just not possible. I think a big problem with those of us quitting games is that we think we need to spend an equal amount of time on one hobby and honestly, 15 to 30 minutes is enough. I'm glad I could help support you as you have also supported me. Thank you.

This week has been nice. It's the first week in months where I haven't had any major pushes at work. It's oddly relaxing this week. I think this will help me wind down and take a nap at lunch and just clear my mind tonight so I can do hobbies and spend time with family. I'm looking forward to it. I still want to do a better job at yoga practice but that will come. I've been reading and writing and relaxing and enjoying it. I also finished sorting my legos so I can build with those with my wife and have another hobby away from the computer screens.

Welcome back. Hope things are going well.

I think it's interesting that the summary you wrote below porn addiction is literally the reason you're using it more. Loneliness and stress relief. Maybe consider joining an activity club out there, volunteering, sports, gym, yoga, to meet others and do things. Maybe there's a list of places to see and you can visit them and see if they provide any new insight on your life. Maybe local museums and art shows. Those are great mixers.

I haven't read any. I just had that mentality to begin with I think. I'll be bored for a bit and start brainstorming and then have a story idea or plan to do something with the family or clean the house etc. It's a nice clarity time for me lol.

It's ok. Sometimes this stuff takes time. Stay patient and just be proud of the fact that you're looking for jobs and spaces for yourself. I experimented with boxing, floor hockey, badminton, volleyball, rock climbing and makerspaces until I found the right place for me. Took like 5 years lol. But I was stubborn. It's tough to nail down something even if you're not overcoming video game addiction etc.

I also haven't done anything today lol. I've cooked breakfast lunch and dinner for my wife and me, read a chapter of a book, did laundry, taken 2 naps, and that's about it lol. I would normally get angry at myself for this but I'm not and I'll say why. Even at my most focused self, I can only write for 1 hour tops. Even if I wanted to do the drums, I only play for 30 minutes tops. Even if I were to read, which I did, it lasts about 30 minutes to 1 hour. That's only 3 hours. I could do all of those activities before bed tonight. I just think it's important to say that because I used to play runescape and other games for 6 to 18 hours a day. After quitting, I thought I needed to do new hobbies that long. The thing is, you can't do every hobby for 6 to 18 hours a day unless you're camping, hunting, or going on a safari. It's just not going to happen. That's why I tell everyone, and a lot of articles tell everyone, to learn to accept boredom. Life isn't meant to be an 18 hour series of time blocks for your specific hobby. That's why we get brain fog after playing games. It's not fog, you're mentally exhausted. Which gets me back to my day of nothing. I think I I'm exhausted and just needed to rest. So I did.

Have you sent any follow up to the tutor or did he reply when you sent it to him?

I've been reading and writing more frequently now that my big house projects are complete. I'm almost done with another chapter of my book. I thought about animating a bit but I really don't enjoy it. I think it's one of those sunk cost things. I hate drawing backgrounds and details. I basically just want to draw people with no hands or feet and have them do stupid things. But I lose interest fast. I find writing pulls me in more. I built some legos this weekend. I really missed it. I think building was my favorite form of art as a kid because it was tangible and fun. I also wanted to disconnect from screens more.

You ok? Need to talk at all?