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today's mission: to sing karaoke somewhere!!!!  

I found a place that has a karaoke night on wednesday evenings 8-11pm, but i won't be able to get there until 9.45. Hopefully I will get a chance to sing or I will have to find somewhere else.

Since I couldn't do the karaoke today I did the bonus mission as well, which was to send a message of appreciation to 3 people.

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END OF WEEK 1 RAMBLING INTROSPECTIVE THOUGHTS POST -


Today the challenge was to have a cold shower. This wasn't bad for me to be honest because I've been having one every morning for the past 2 weeks! I also did a month of cold showers last year because there was a challenge to do that on Habitica.  I still make strange animal noises when I first jump in, and I still shout "IS THAT THE BEST YOU GOT!!?!" at the shower head - but the sudden sharp intake of breath is less intense at least...

Today I spent…. around 4 hours on the internet. I'd like to do less than that….. Sunday is the danger day 'cause I don't have things scheduled past the morning ….

I smell all salty right now because I went for a long bike ride this evening, and went climbing rocks by the sea, it was windy and the sea was splashing on me. I shouted "F(£&%@@ YOUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!" at the sea as loud as I could!!!!!! I had a lot of energy in me! I was full of wonder at everything. the universe is so crazy huge and incredible, it's a wonder I'm afraid to do anything. When I was on the rocks by the rough sea tonight I thought, right now I would die happy... if I can accept that, dying at any time, what have I got to lose then? It's a really freeing feeling.

another of my friends is getting married next year lol the thing is I'm happy being on my own right now, but I still compare myself to others.   I ask myself what do I want?? I think, to express myself, as me, as an artist, share ideas, create visions, promote diversity of thought, throw rainbow spanners in the works..... often I feel like I'm holding back, from a fear of rejection, failure, fear of what others think.  Which is why I've really liked doing these 'courage' missions for the first week of the Challenge.

It helps me to think of life as one big experiment. I love this quote, ""The way to war is a well-paved highway and the way to peace is still a wilderness."  It makes me think that it's actually our duty to do more experimenting in our lives because we still haven't found enough peace yet!

 Ultimately I want to live with a higher motivation that just doing things to challenge my will or to have some arbitrary goal of success.  I want to develop and live by a life philosophy, like The Slight Edge talked about. I'm going to work on writing a life vision statement or something lol
 
  ..... It was nice to think about stuff just riding around random neighbourhoods under a full moon tonight. And looking into people's houses as I ride past…. seeing people sitting on the couch watching tv…. it's fun……. lol now I sound creepy

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World peace is a joke???????

 

  1. - Knock knock

* Who's there?

- World peace

* Ha, yeah right!! BYE

 

  1. Why did the chicken cross the road?

To raise money for world peace.

 

  1. - Why did the chicken cross the road?

-To get to the possible world-peace-creating-man's house...

- knock knock

* who's there?

- the chicken

 

  1. - Doctor doctor, I feel like the world is falling to pieces

* That's impossible, there's only one piece. World Peace, dude!!!!!!!!!!

 

  1. A man walks into a bar and shouts "WORLD PEACE IS POSSIBLE!!"

Everyone turns to look at him. They give him a standing ovation. They go out and proceed to save the world.

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Today's mission was to do the 7 Minute Workout.   I really liked it!!  I'll try to put it in my daily routine. it's an improvement on just my '10 press ups' at the moment. also makes a cold shower a bit less daunting after working up a sweat.

  • I've been using RescueTime for over a month now so I just checked out the Monthly Report of my time spent on the computer
  • Some really interesting insights!!! This month so far I've spent 139 hours on the computer. 
  • So that's….. 6 hours a day so far, on average…...
  • I've spent   29 of those 139 hours in my main music program, Cubase, so thats about an hour a day, i would like to average more than that though. I want that to be my main computer activity!!!  My best day was May 12th when I did 4 and a half hours in Cubase.
  • and I've spent 13 hours on this forum lol

Let's say I get up to 180 hours this month….. times 12 months is 2160….. so in a year that's….. 90 24-hour days….. let's imagine this was the same for the past 10 years…….  900 days or 2 and a half years.   So, let's see….. let's say I averaged about an hour a day of music for the past 10 years, I'm upto 3650 hours.  Still a way to go until 10,000 then !!!!!!!! INTERESTING

So let's think about this further…. this is getting complicated for my brain, but…. if I carry on the same then. it will take me about another 20 years to get to 10,000!!!! BUT.. if I up my average to 2 hours a day, it could take another 10 years. now, if I upped my average to 3 hours a day, it would be about 6 years…… I think that's right?  interesting…. (I'm using 10,000 hours as a goalpost because i heard thats the number you have to reach to have 'mastery' of something)

If I could somehow do that, i'd be 34 by then …… that's really exciting to think about. you know what, I'm going to start a countdown to my 34th birthday. i'll put it on the whiteboard along with my countdown to 77 years old ^_^^_^^_^^_^^_^

Edited by usernameforworldpeace!
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  1. Today's mission was to write down a list of tasks I need to complete. Inspired by Cam's example of apologising to someone, instantly I thought of a handful of examples in my life where I wasn't at my best and I've always felt bad about. So I decided to write letters to these people to apologise.
  2. :$
  3. I made an account on Facebook and sent them the letters this evening. I sent letters to an old friend and an old acquaintance, both who I felt I took part in teasing unkindly when I was a teenager.  I sent one to my older cousin apologising about something I said to them when I was a child, and one to a friend who I feel I let down a few years ago.
  4. :/
  5. I'll have to wait and see if any of them respond.... I feel incredibly vulnerable right now, but at the same time feel like I just kicked life's ass.  This has turned into a really scary mission for me lol but also one of the most profound.  
  6. Thanks

 

----------

In other news I got my first 3 music hours under my belt today on the path to ''10,000 hours by 34''. Woohoo

Tomorrow it's karaoke...

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45 MINUTES MEDITATING

The mission today was to meditate for 45 minutes.  That is a long time, what I did was what the Headspace meditations do and just kept counting my breaths.  I almost fell a sleep a few times, I felt myself nodding off LOL.  And I checked the time once to see how long I had left.  But I definitely felt very very relaxed when the time was up. I didn't want to talk and ruin the peace.

-------

KARAOKE DANCING QUEEN

OK great I did the karaoke tonight.  I sang…. you guessed it, Dancing Queen by ABBA ^_^  It was in a hotel bar, it seemed that most of people singing were regulars because when he announced me he said "OK we have a new singer" lol.  But it went OK…. as a musician, I record myself singing sometimes, but I never go to open mic nights to perform so this was scary. However once, I don't know what I was thinking but I agreed to sing a solo at a funeral…. that was really scary………..….

--------

TWO PEOPLE RESPOND

Two people have responded to my apology letters from yesterday.  They couldn't have been better to be honest.  It feels really great to have that closure on these things that have kind of been niggling away in my mind all these years!!!!! I'm really happy about that

---------

I'm facing a lot of fears these past few days. It's good

giphy.gif

 

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Day 10,177 of life
(went on family holiday for a few days ------)

Today's mission was to write out 10 fears and make a plan to tackle one of them.

1 Afraid of rejection    - talk to a girl ? 
2 Afraid of being laughed at/ridiculed    - dress very silly, walk round in public
3 Afraid of travelling to a foreign country alone   - travel to a foreign country
4 Afraid of making mistakes, being less than perfect -   sing songs at open mic night
5 Afraid of being out of control   -  get drunk once to experience it 
6 Fear of being naked in public -  go to a nudist colony
7 Fear of being emotionally open -  Say I love you and other appreciative things to family, people
8 Fear of giving everything and failing -  give music your all
9 Fear of dancing in public  - go to a night club or just dance in street
10 Fear of doing a headstand (lol) -  try against a wall

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The fear I  choose to face for the mission is 2. Afraid of being laughed at -----  I will dress in a very silly outfit and walk around in a busy public place.
1. Design silly outfit (hire costume parts?)
2.  Put outfit on
3. Take bus into town
4. Walk, skip, jump around town
5. Go home

giphy.gif

today I am pleased because after having a holiday break, I went straight back into my morning routine and got 3.5 hours music done

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--------------------------------today's mission was to record my voice and experiment with different ways of talking, seeking rapport, breaking rapport, neutral etc

 

-------i'm glad this is a mission because weirdly it's something i think about quite a bit.  It's like I 'don't know how to speak', what pitch range, how loud to talk,    how to pronounce certain words (accent), often i find myself talking uncomfortably low, or I even talked in a bizarre 'gruff voice' for a while lol! somehow I developed that habit.    Just the past few days I've been trying to speak with a higher tone with the intention of sounding more friendly ….

 

-----------Recording my voice today,   I realise I definitely do have a sort of british accent. And when I speak in a higher tone, intending to sound more friendly, it just sounds odd lol.  My voice gets a bit croaky at the ends of sentences  -  it's like I go too low in pitch.  Sometimes I trip over words trying to speak too quickly.  and sometimes I mumble words (but it's miles better than 5 years ago when i mumbled everything lol!), the sounds get darker and it doesn't sound great.  

 

----I watched a helpful video a couple weeks ago, might have been recommended here actually -- a guy talked about how to talk, about just slowing the pacing down a little bit and feeling the rhythm of the words.  I noticed when I focus on speaking clearly it sounds a lot better.  As a musician I like to listen to people's voices and notice how some people talk more melodically than others. In fact I once heard that musicians have more melodic talking styles because they are musicians,  but in my experience I haven't noticed that.

 

---------------------------------------------------------------Anyway I found this mission of analysing my speaking voice weirdly fun!

Edited by usernameforworldpeace!
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Good Idea. I used to mumble a bit and I'm not sure if that's still the cases, so I'll do the same process you did and see if I want to change anything.

What kind of music do you do?

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Today's mission was to

meet three new people

and use baiting statements

to try to start a

conversation with them

 

  1. the first time, I was at the fancy dress shop. I bought a couple of things and said to the lady, "I'm off to play the organ now" (I was playing organ at an evening service). She smiled in a laughing kind of way and said nothing lol. She seemed like a quiet person. Well, I couldn't think of anything else to say so I put the stuff in my bag and said our good byes   hehe!!
  2. Next I was buying some food at the store. I said hello how are you to the cashier, it was nice.  And I said "I've just been to the fancy dress shop" she smiled quite enthusiastically but didn't say anything so I said "yeah, I bought a hat, and some glasses" and um, couldn't think what else to say again so it was kind of awkward while she scanned my food but it was funny lol.  she definitely seemed to respond in kind to my attempt of energy though.
  3. The third time I went in another shop to buy some jam. I said hello how are you and he said fine thank you sir.  Then I asked him, What's your favourite colour?   He said "blue." and that was that.  haha, well I didn't know what I was expecting!!!!!! I guess I could have told him my favourite colour too.   But at least I know his now!!
  4.  there is no 4
  5. there is a 5 only joking

I didn't really ignite any conversations, hmm maybe these baiting statements weren't the best ones. I'll keep trying to start conversations like this though, it was funny and obviously I want to have conversations! ^_^

 

Orange-and-almond-srping-cake-hero-58d07

Edited by usernameforworldpeace!
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I think your baiting statements were great actually. It probably had more to do with the following:

1. Just older aged people who are less likely to start a conversation
2. European culture

You did the right thing though. :)

Thanks.  I think you're probably right about those things….

 

today's mission was to use baiting statements to start conversations and then introduce myself by name to three people.

There was an arts fair on today and I thought, great! a perfect place to try this out. I can talk to the artisans about their creations, and get to know some creative people!

So I went down to the arts fair and walked around the stalls. For some reason I just wasn't feeling it and had in my head "I'm not going to do this". I walked around then went back home. Was I nervous, embarrassed? :( bit disappointed 'cus I didn't do the challenge. I didn't go out of my comfort zone. I'll try it again tomorrow with a better mindset hopefully - I'm gonna kick its butt!!!  I've noticed I prefer to do these challenges when there aren't many people around - I find the thought of other people looking and listening embarrassing... SO I guess that's why I need to do the 'dress like a crazy fool' in public mission ASAP, because then everyone will be looking probably xD  I've made a silly outfit so just need to do that now haha.

Looking at the bigger picture though, I am feeling more confident in socialising. Now I am saying "morning" or "hello" to most people I pass on my bike, and today I had a good long chat with a friend.

---------

I've been doing well lately with avoiding distracting internet, and working on music instead --- sticking to my goal of 3 hours music a day minimum (the past couple days I've managed 5 hours because I'm trying to make up for my days on holiday last week!!)   but today I could feel myself slipping into old habits of spending the rest of the day on the internet after sunday lunch.  Luckily I stopped after an hour and opened up Cubase to make some more music. In the evening I continued to make music but with an internet browser open so it wasn't as focused but better than nothing!!

(Note to self: think about using Sunday to work on different projects,  just so you don't tire yourself out working on the same things all week)

 

 

 

Thanks for reading.

 

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Think of it like this. When you were out you were all caught up in your head worrying about what others thought about you.

Do you think you were the only person there who thought that?

NO WAY. It's more likely that EVERYONE ELSE THERE had the same thoughts. 

People don't really notice others because we are all so caught up in our own heads. Lol. :P

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To face my fear of being laughed at, today I walked around town dressed like this (pic in the quotes box):

 

 


I'll get to that in a minute!  First I'll talk about yesterday's failed challenge that I tried again today -

start a conversation with three people then introduce myself.

--------------------------------
"MY FAVOURITE ANIMAL IS A WHALE"

  • I wanted to try chatting to younger people my age this time.  My first couple attempts, in shops buying food or a drink, I didn't really try to start a conversation.  I thought, "boy this is going to be expensive if I keep buying stuff just to chat!" lol so next I went in a clothes shop and talked with the young man at the till. After our friendly greetings my baiting statement today was "what's your favourite animal?"  He thought about it for while and said "um… probably a lion" and I said really wow awesome or something then I introduced myself and he said nice to meet you lol. Then I asked him where the men's section was
  1. The next shop there were two young people at the till so I greeted them both and again asked them what their favourite animal was. this conversation felt soooooo awkward lol the girl laughed and was like "I don't really have one" and the guy told me "well I have a dog" and I tried to keep the conversation going asking him about his dog and he has a Whippet called Ellie lol.  Then I told them about my pets and said "can you guess what my favourite animal is?" they guessed a cat but I told them it's a whale!!  Then I introduced myself, and carried on looking around the shop.   When I left I said thanks and the girl said "OK bye Josh!"  So they used my name at least xDDDD

-------------------------------
"THAT MAN IS DRESSED AS AN ELF"
 

  • OK GREAT so now I had to do the mission I set myself to walk around town in a silly outfit. I was dressed in a suit from work so my plan was to use the public toilets and change in a cubicle, like Superman (more like…. Sillyman!).  But before that, to psych myself up I went to the library and read some of my favourite book "The Way To Love" by Anthony De Mello.  

Then I thought - I can change outfits in the library toilet! So I did…  I was terrified while getting changed, thinking "what the heck am I doing?!?!?!!" but I went down the stairs and as soon as I stepped out of the library I just sort of went on auto-pilot!!! Walking round the streets I tried to act as normal as possible, smiling politely, being calm. And the funny thing is, after a while I didn't even feel nervous, I actually felt kind of relaxed lolll just cruising round in my sexy outfit!  Some people laughed or smirked as I went past (good, that means it was silly enough) I saw people looking and laughing but nobody commented at me and I felt no hostility from others. In fact most people just walked on by without batting an eyelid - this surprised me pleasantly :)  The whole time I was trying not to laugh because it was sooo funny xD   I heard a child say "that man is dressed as an elf" lol.

  1. I went into the health food shop I always go in and bought some soup. I was really polite and they didn't say anything haha! They probably thought I was having a nervous breakdown lol
  2. So then I walked to the bus stops, got the bus home and that was that.  

 

I did it! I'm so proud of myself today.

--------------------------------------------------------------- 

 

Think of it like this. When you were out you were all caught up in your head worrying about what others thought about you.

Do you think you were the only person there who thought that?

NO WAY. It's more likely that EVERYONE ELSE THERE had the same thoughts. 

People don't really notice others because we are all so caught up in our own heads. Lol. :P

Thanks,  this also helped me today.

Edited by usernameforworldpeace!
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Yesterday's challenge was to look up events happening nearby this week and go to a couple that look interesting.  I've always been interested in world religions and spiritual stuff so I've emailed a local Buddhist group and a local Islam group to see if I might be able to come along one night ^_^  In terms of hobbies, there's a local music festival later on in the month which I've never been to, so I'll make sure I go to that.

-----

The challenge today is to organise an event e.g. a dinner party and invite people I know to it.  I've decided to go for a 'poker / games party' .  I've sent some people emails inviting them so I'll see if they can come or not.

-----

In other news I went to the shop wearing a party hat today. :) It's something I've wanted to do for a while, wear a party hat in public. It's millions of people's birthday every day so why not! No one said anything and the shop assistants smiled.  After monday's challenge I have more confidence doing strange things.

-----

paety-verjaardag-38895202.jpg

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OK the "go to events" and "have a party" challenges are shaping up!!  The Islam group kindly agreed to let me come and observe a prayer session next week! I'm excited to say hi and see what it's like.   Also I've had two yes's so far for the 'poker /games party' on sunday!  :)  I've never hosted a party before (like a lot of stuff I've been doing lately!!!) let's see what happens!!!

Today's challenge was to 'pay-it-forward', buy a drink and pay for the next person's too.  I went into a few coffee shops because I wanted to find one where people would queue behind me but they wouldn't queue behind me!! It was probably the time of day.  So in the end I had to just say 'can you pay for the next person's drink with this please'. The girl seemed quite blasé about it, maybe it happens quite a bit!

Slipped up a bit today with the music writing!  Only got 1.5 hours clocked when I had time for more. No worries though, I got a new song idea. I'm now in debt by 15 hours (13.5 hours still to catch up from holiday days).

 

 

 

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