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NEW VIDEO: I Replaced Gaming With Real Life (Nicco Transformation)

Vee

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  1. I have four routes that I do semi-regularly, but I like to try the odd random route. While I sometimes push myself in terms of speed, my only real goal is one of exploration. I use Strava to log my runs, and there's another app called Veloviewer that connects to it and has an "explorer tiles" feature (the world is divided up into 1km squares), which encourages me to try new routes to cover the most squares. It feels like a far more compelling goal to me than speed, distance, or some specific race. Sounds like you're doing great minimising screen time! Can you pinpoint why you are mildly miserable, or is it just lots of little things/nothing in particular? Or else because it's winter? (if you're in the northern hemisphere)
  2. Did you enjoy the chitchat when you came home, if you ignore the lost time? (Which I'm guessing is why you think you shouldn't have chitchatted?) Socialising is important, and even little bits of small talk can help contribute to general wellbeing, perhaps even more so if it's spontaneous, rather than planned.
  3. Still been gaming excessively, but got some stuff done around it, and I've focused only on one game, at least. As it's a semi-idle game, technically that leaves me with time to do other things, but I do often micromanage it instead. Had a good call with writing friends on Thursday, although we didn't discuss writing (I haven't written in over a month!). Went to a great dance event with a friend on Friday and I'm pleased that I introduced her to something new - she's keen to go again some time. I also got some solid reading done on the train there, and I've done a tiny bit of reading at home since - only five minutes yesterday, but half an hour today, which is something. I've been a bit better with my sleeping/eating/hygiene/chores than I was earlier this month. Maybe it would be good to bite the bullet and quit gaming again...
  4. I don't have any wise words to add to the above, but I just want to say... I hear you. That sounds like a horrible experience, made even more difficult by not having supportive people around you. I hope 2024 goes better for you.
  5. Good to see someone else get into running as well! I've let it fall to the wayside over the last month, but I'm keen to get back into running regularly again. Do you have a certain route you mostly stick to, or do you mix it up?
  6. Still gaming, but making that post yesterday was clearly the kick up the arse I needed to get some stuff done. Since that post I: Talked about indoor skydiving with my housemate, though I'm waiting on him to confirm what day works Went for my second jog of the year, and the first proper length one (last week did a 3K jog, today was 6K). It went surprisingly well, considering I've barely exercised in the last month - I even got some personal bests on Strava segments! Did a bunch of chores I've ignored (dishwasher, laundry, bank stuff) Arranged to visit London on Friday with two friends for an event (I initiated it!) Booked an appointment with the opticians for tomorrow (haven't been in five years) Finally ordered an electric toothbrush, which I've been meaning to do for a while but inexplicably avoided. On the gaming front, the only progress I've made is limiting myself to one game. I don't miss the other two I was playing, at least not yet. I haven't moderated my use of the one game, but by doing the above I've at least played it slightly less today. Something I recently implemented in my private journal that I really like is automatically linking to the same day in previous years. Since I only started journalling at the end of 2022, I get at most one entry at the moment. Google technically does a similar thing with the maps timeline, but that only shows where I was, not what my mental or physical state was. This time last year I hadn't jogged in years, and I wrote about how much my hip had been hurting. Nowadays it takes over an hour of walking/running until my hip starts hurting, instead of ten minutes, or it simply hurting while lying in bed. It also reminds me of little conversations I've had with friends. I've really been enjoying how journalling (especially in Obsidian!) assists my memory and shows a) how I've changed and b) the positive experiences I've had. Tomorrow's plans: since I intend to walk to and from the opticians I don't plan on running, unless I don't walk. Maybe I'll also go to the supermarket. I've completely ignored writing for about a month and don't feel up to doing any, but a friend has sent me a short story to critique, so I might do that tomorrow. I have loads of books lying around in my room that were gifted or lent to me last year, so I really want to start reading them. My rough plan going forward is to see if I can maintain this level of engagement with the world, and then uninstall Steam next week. I know it may seem silly ("The best time is now!" etc), but I feel like I need to slowly remind myself of alternatives so that I don't end up lying in bed all day. I've been reading a little yesterday and today about problem-solving vs creating, so I guess that's influenced this way of thinking.
  7. Vee

    Road to 75kg

    I don't see why you would be kicked off here, unless there's something I'm missing. I don't think there is much pleasure to be gained from seeing someone do badly, at least for me. Seeing others grow is satisfying, as well as seeing people pick themselves up when they have "failed". Failure is a temporary state, it's not an inherent part of someone. Why don't you care about yourself?
  8. To clarify, I don't think I can moderate (though I always wish I could...). It's more that if I'm putting visible restrictions on myself, e.g. using a blocker, then some part of me wants to rebel, moreso than if I merely uninstall Steam and do just try to use willpower. I'm not really sure how to describe it, to be honest. It isn't logical. ...Anyway, I've continued to game for the last month. I don't feel capable of quitting right now, because I feel too apathetic about everything. At the moment, gaming is the main thing that gets me out of bed, and while that's obviously rubbish, if I quit gaming I don't feel like I've got anything else to get up for. Sometimes even gaming hasn't been enough, and I've spent most of a day just lying in bed daydreaming. Most of my other attempts at hobbies and routines have fallen to the wayside. I've semi kept up with my journalling, I think that's the only thing. I've done quite a bit of socialising over the last month, though. I hadn't seen or spoken to my sister in 13 years (we have never been on bad terms, but our family is complicated), and in December I initiated a reunion. It was good! I have so many worries about what she would be like, but it was perfectly pleasant, and we've exchanged a couple of texts since. I also saw my Nana last weekend (again, initiated by me) who I haven't spoken to in 5 years or so. It was awkward, but she seemed to really appreciate it. Done various other bits of socialising, and I haven't chosen to game over doing social stuff, so that's something. I've also signed up for a data analyst course that begins in February. I'm not sure how useful it will be, but it will at least give me a bit of structure, and with any luck will lead to job opportunities. Right now I guess I need to pull myself out of my apathy a bit so I can recommit to not gaming. I know gaming itself contributes to my apathy, but despite the occasional socialising, I've been in such a haze the last month that if it's a choice between lying in bed all day vs gaming all day, I think the latter is a better choice. EDIT: I have three main games I've been addicted to recently. I've now logged out from the browser-based one (I don't remember my password, so there would be friction getting back into it) and deleted the non-Steam one. I've also uninstalled most of the Steam games I had installed over the last month, but I've kept the one I'm addicted to, for now. Will think about uninstalling Steam, but not committing to that today. I'm recommitting to using TickTick daily (task and habit tracker). The silly reason I haven't really used it recently is because I haven't been using my second monitor (where I used to have it up 90% of the time), so I simply forget it exists. I'm also changing various bits in it that will help remind me of alternatives to gaming and encourage me to use it more.
  9. Hope the interview goes well! It sounds like you're doing great with not gaming and with recognising trigger points.
  10. ...Obviously I just continued gaming for weeks. It's cooled down a little in the last few days, but I've still got one idle game open, which is on Steam. I played My Time at Sandrock for 77hrs, and I enjoyed myself for many of those hours, perhaps even over 50%. But while playing it, everything else in my life was on hold. Then I switched between a few other games - I enjoyed playing one of the other games, but the rest were just mindless. Now that I'm over the "omg I haven't played games for so long, I must play ALL THE GAMES CONSTANTLY" phase, I'm thinking about going back to quitting. I mean, it's popped into my head literally every day, but this is the first day I've felt like I can face posting on this forum. I'm trying not to judge myself harshly, and trying to engage with the "radical acceptance" concept. I spent many hours playing games, that's a fact. Some of that time was enjoyable. Some of it simply passed the time, and I suppose in a way that's okay. But because I've spent many hours playing games, I have not been eating regularly, or keeping up with exercise, or journalling. Because I avoided my to-do/habit app (TickTick) I have also not been keeping up with taking supplements or brushing my teeth regularly. All these things are necessary for my short- and long-term wellbeing. I feel/felt guilty for not doing some things I felt I "should" do, e.g. write, engage with my writing group, look into courses that would help me with work. I'd prefer it if I had done those things. I didn't manage to stick to not playing games for as long as I would have liked (and thus fell into a pattern of lower functioning), so I need to experiment and try out different ways that worked for me. Things that didn't work: - The Freedom App. Probably any restriction app. I think specifically trying to limit myself made me rebel against it, and also reminded me that I was restricting myself. I didn't feel free. I would hate the idea of someone else having a pass code, so I don't think that would work. - Using gaming as a reward. Well, duh. It's too easy to see through the lie of "I can only game when I've done X" - actually I can play whenever the hell I like. If I did want to try moderation, I think I'd need to simply...choose moderation. Not try to restrict myself to only before Xam or after Ypm. - Reinstalling Steam. Well yeah, duh, but I mean even if I could moderate my behaviour (doubtful), Steam is designed to lure me into new shiny things. Or even old shiny things, e.g. when the news feature tells me a game I haven't played for years has a shiny new update. - Chastising myself when I did slip up. Shame led me to avoid actually thinking through what I was doing, and led to me playing even more. I don't know what I need in order to recommit to not playing. This post is just a way to say... I'm thinking about it. I haven't abandoned Game Quitters quite yet.
  11. My brain just fell back into the familiar pattern of chasing the feeling of progression, and since a) I didn't use Locked Mode and b) Freedom doesn't block a tab if its already open when the blocking session starts (e.g. with a Unity WebGL game, or a single page javascript game), it was easy to ignore. The mental pathways just felt so familiar that when I started it was difficult to stop. I felt in a weird brain space where I could see the hours drift by, but all my other priorities just felt...muted. I was aware I wanted to do other things, but I didn't truly feel it. My idea above about only playing after Xpm in the evening feels foolish now. Even if I did manage to stick to it, the rest of the day I would still be thinking about gaming, and planning what to do in the game (My Time at Sandrock is my current temptation). I can spend a lot of time devoted to gaming outside of actually gaming, whether that's looking at wikis or watching videos or just writing notes about a game. Maybe the answer is to look into solo journalling games? Those could give a vibe of progression, while also being more focused on writing and slower vibes.
  12. After 56 days I broke my streak. Badly. On Monday I thought maybe the way to wake up early was to use the Freedom software to block web browser games at all times except 5am-9am, that way maybe it would help motivate me to get up at a vaguely reasonable time. And on Monday, it worked. I woke up at 8am, played a mindless browser game, then did some writing, went for a good jog, and went to a writing discord meeting. Tuesday was a complete write-off. I woke up before 9am, then disabled the Freedom stuff so I could play stupid browser games (that I didn't even like) all day. I didn't leave the house, or eat properly (all I ate was porridge and chocolate) or do anything but game for maybe 12 hours. I resisted installing Steam, but I'm not sure I'd consider that a good thing since the games I did play were even lower quality than I'd play on Steam. Wednesday through to today were also gaming days, though I had switched to two mobile games, thinking that I wouldn't devote much time to them because I don't usually use my phone much... I went from my usual <30m a day on my phone to 7+hrs. Still, I managed to jog Thursday, Friday and Saturday, did some chores, and ate better. I had the option to socialise on Friday but I didn't, perhaps partly due to gaming (although I was also worn out from my jog that day). I uninstalled the mobile games a few hours ago. But oh God I really want to be able to game in moderation. I keep thinking about reinstalling Steam and trying to not gaming before Xpm, the time depending on how much I've gotten done... I know it's never worked before, but I guess I'm forever the optimist.
  13. Out of curiosity, why do you frame these things as "lost time"?
  14. To clarify, he released the episode to the public without discussing with you the mistake/inclusion of the mistake? Regardless of his motivations, this seems like a shitty thing to do. I would think the normal way of handling this would be to mention "Oh, it turns out you made this mistake, but I reckon it would be funny and engaging to still include it. What do you think?" It would take two seconds to drop you a message and properly communicate. I guess it's impossible to be sure of his actual motivations. Perhaps the best thing is to draw up a list of pros and cons of the podcast, and focus on what is best for your personal growth, or happiness, or whatever metric you feel is most important to measure it by. Do you think it would be possible to drop the podcast and still maintain a friendship with him?
  15. My sleep schedule has gone back to being trash. I was up late both yesterday and Thursday due to socialising though, so it wasn't just me mindlessly browsing online etc. I walked back from the train station last night at 1am and the night sky was GORGEOUS. Made me want to get into hiking to see how beautiful the stars can be in a more remote place (I live in a large town). I then dreamt I walked from Land's End to John O'Groats with a friend 😄. That's the length of the UK! I doubt I've even walked for four hours in a day before, and that's without a rucksack, yet my mind drifts to one of the most challenging hikes one can do in this country. I have previously chatted to some fit friends about having a hiking holiday in Wales, though we haven't planned anything concrete. On Thursday I jogged a full 10k for the first time! Did it in 1:04:53, which I know isn't fast, but it is great for me and I was very pleased, even if I secretly hoped it would be under an hour. I had only intended to do ~7k walk-run mix, but found I wasn't having any issues 4k in (the point where I usually can't resist walking), so I just added an extra loop. I was thinking next year maybe I would try to do more exploratory runs. There's a Strava add-on called Veloviewer that has a cool "explorer squares" feature, which basically encourages you to try new routes and cover as much of the map as possible. I was daydreaming about jogging 10k out and getting a bus back, or getting a train to the next nearest town and doing jogging loops there. I'd want to be able to consistently jog 10k before I set that as a goal though. Despite the above paragraphs, I've been feeling a bit low the last few days. I'm not sure why. I spent more time in bed because of it and I wish I hadn't, but I can also see how much better I've coped with the low mood. On Thursday I found myself crying a little, yet somehow managed to push myself out and run 10k - something that would have been inconceivable to me this time last year. On Friday I wanted to hole myself up in my room all day, but pushed myself out to see friends a couple of towns over. I don't actually know if those things helped me, but the mere fact I was able to do them is amazing. I guess this is what it is like to just feel "sad" rather than depressed.
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