Kad

"Get some inspirational quotes up on my wall". I am trying to reduce my negativity and be more a glass half full type. One of the things I do is a daily quote app. The ones I like, I can save and you could use those to post on your board.

not sure of the day of life buidling atm and barely know the day - I flew most of the weekend across country and back for my new puppy! Not a great weekend for goals and habits but I tried to make healthy choices, stay hydrated and I decided carrying 40 lbs from place to place counted as my strength app! I did study on the long flights and remembered my meditation! Shared the power of habit with a seat mate on the flight and they are going to read it too. I am almost done and it is such a great book. As I type this I am rather proud of trying to maintain my goals in topsy turvy circumstances. The puppy is howling, chewed on me and everything. She is so happy and follows us everywhere. Considering she just had 10 hours of travel, left her family and joined ours she is doing fabulous. Its so funny how we are shaping our lives for her until she is trained to keep her and the house safe. The task looks daunting but I am tying to stay in the moment and find gratitude on the puppy instead of she peed there and chewed that cable and how do we teach to not bite. Travel makes you appreciate your home and routines. Sleeping in your own bed and your favorite foods. Gratefulness: Home with familyNice travel companionsBackpacks that hold everything!Pajamas

I honestly don't play much. I play steam type games that are more like puzzles or funny. Braid or Sherlock Holmes with my Hubby. I think I have played like 3 times in 2-3 weeks. I did try dark souls as it is a game I loved the past. About 30 minutes in, I was asking myself why was I there and have not played since. I have put gaming into the category of things to do for mindless fun and relaxation. This is small bit of time commitment in my weekly budget. That time is shared by mindless books, TV etc. So if I wish a mindless sort of activity because I'm tired then I chose something to do for a short bit. Lately, I have been in the mood for TV for that limited time. I don't have cable because it is not worth the expense for such limited use. So I just order something from itunes or utube documentary. Watch an hour or so then Im done or read leisure for an hour or so then I'm done. I try to treat games that way. Honestly, I don't think about them all that much. My analogy is desserts..an occasional treat but not how you want your total nutrition. Occasionally I want a donut but not normally. I indulge my craving then I'm good for a year or so. So if I'm craving some game playing..I play for bit then Im good. This pattern feels healthier and games priority is at the bottom of everything else. Only the test of time will tell if the right approach. I love all the changes in my life since I left gaming 4-8 hrs per day and even longer on my days off. I get sick just trying to imagine living like that again and never want that again. I have strong support on this journey with my family and we discussed and created this gaming plan. We have an exit strategy and identified danger signals for emergent evaluation to prevent relapse. I spend a larger amount of time on this forum than my leisure activities because I enjoy it and its helpful. I also want to support others making the changes they are trying to make although i don't think I do much there except in spirit. We each see things abit differently but so many things have cross over into each other's lives. It is rather exciting. @kortheo and his thoughts on being flexible where you work instead of being stuck there strikes a cord as I struggle with a difficult work environment. Reading Joe's journal as he balances the ebb and flow of a busy schedule and has to shift priorities then brings them back when the time is right. The dogged persistence of @hycniejsy trying to achieve his goals and the strength of that. It is a very positive community and the personal growth is infectious! TL:DR - I'm trying a moderation experiment, it seems to work ok, I play nothing too serious and its low priority as that is where I classify games in my life now.

Congrats on your progress! My first 3 weeks were my hardest of my 90 day detox and weirdly the last week of it. I do find many gaming things boring now and information about them tedious. It is rather hard to even sit still that long anymore even when I need to for studying. What things have you added to your life to keep busy and to enjoy doing?

Life builder day 13 - Good day Long hours of work but its been going smooth. Our candidate references did not quite work out ..so the search continues. Not been 100% on my habits but I think that is more realistic ie do strength app 5 of 7 days etc. I have set several of goals like that and track them via my productivity app that I am rather enjoying. When I don't meet my goals I look at why. Do I want to change anything, what did I learn and how am I going to be better. These are my goals and choices after all. For example, did not meet my MFP calorie goal 5 days of 7. Why not - aha..lets tweak this. I have also been doing a better job of feeling good and being satisfied when I do make my goals, whereas before I more thought - well of course you should do them. This change of being pleased when I do my strength app or make my calorie goal, journal whatever has gone a long way to my overall life satisfaction. I think it is related to letting go of perfection in many ways. Perfect me would do such and such everyday without fail..life happens...habit missed...fail. Vicious loop that feels so amazing to turn off. Doing my habits perfectly is not required and when I do them it is good and progress to how I want my life to work. Gaming is not much in my thoughts these days. My plan of occasionally (max 2 days a week and limited to 3 hours) is pretty much working fine. I have not downloaded WOW or the other MMOs I played before nor do I wish too atm. They sound tiring and boring. Too much I would rather do and should do. It is getting easier to get the massive amount of real life stuff done too. Wunderlist is a god send and keeps me on track without cluttering my brain of my to do lists. As I clean up those tasks that were ignored for so long, there is massive peace and contentment. Still much to do though. I would like to be reading more - still working my way through the power of habit which is fabulous but my priority is studying and I will do more leisure reading after my big exam in the fall. Meditation is still not working satisfactory but I am not giving up on it. Those racing thoughts need it! Thanks Cam for the recommendation for Tara Brach - Radical Acceptance. I will add to my reading list towards the top. I did find the statement of Lean into the physical symptoms and racing thoughts instead of avoiding them or resisting them valuable. This has worked quite well for rampant emotions so honestly it should work there too. Grateful: Still grateful for everything!Loved the sound and beauty of the rain on me as I left a storeBeing home and pleasantly tired from a long dayFull and warm when so many are notTea lights

Congrats!!

Welcome! Most had practice attempts before our success at quitting games. Be proud of your persistance. Removing games from our lives often reveals what we used to games to hide from and that ends up being our true task. These things are great to keep you busy while you manage learning to have a life without games. It is so worth it though.

Welcome to our group! You have made a wonderful start! Be proud of your choice. You also have defined things you want to work on and that will keep you busy as you learn to have a life without games. One of my favorite things to do each day on detox was an app to count the days and watch my accomplishment grow. Journaling will help you as you deal with your thoughts on the items you are changing. Most of us are working on things in our lives we want to make better and often times it is as we remove the gaming crutch we deal with those things honestly. Good luck

Life builder day 9 Hard to believe i posted last thursday, time moves fast. Been busy with studying, work and trying to put in some fun. Some good things happening at work and we have hired someone! Relief on the horizon and two more to go. Lots of positive things going on and it feels great. Grateful: Everything!

It's good to read how you balance your needs of the moment of taking care of yourself with your long-term goals! Nice flexibility to life as it happens

Day 6 Life building phase Today I discovered while moving ahead with habits and work with my general sadness, I realized I need to give myself permission to trust in the process of growth and it is safe. As said by @kortheo it is a cycle of breaking down to become that which is unknown. Rather a scary process to be honest. There are parts we like of ourselves and we don't want to lose them. there is safety in the known even if unhealthy. It is a leap of faith to the new me. Thankfully, I have the experience that generally when I change, I become more me. The true me and like it better. Grateful: Bird sounds and picturesEasy days at work to counter the crazy onesSleepFinding answers in your selfSmiles

Oh and I want to second Alex, your life is not a failure. It may not be where you want it and that is why you are here.

Grats! You are starting and being honest. These first days are the worse. Don't expect perfection, just do your best and keep learning what you need and what your triggers are. One of the things I use gaming for is stress distraction. I get stressed and I want to game. I now watch for my stress level and use things to relax me and keep me busy. In the first days, I watched alot of game quitters videos and I started on the book respawn. That was all I could handle the first bit. Here are some starts What to expect after you quit - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDpRDvFvImw How to deal with cravings - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PjLmwn_0GWM This one really helped me let go of the just one more this or finish that concepts - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5jnmwt5Q9w The 90 day detox that most of us started with. I got an app and counted my days. It helped to see it go up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxdA10WKV6w Others looked at the 60 habits and keep themselves busy through that methods. Hang in there and be proud you started.

Welcome back JBR! Have to retype this as we lost power as i was hitting the submit button. Today was a better day although my mood is still down. Oh well life goes on. I have no valid reason for how I feel. My family and I are fine and we have much to be grateful for and I am. One of these days I will figure out how to let stuff go. Letting go is a big goal of mine - letting go of stress, past issues, fears, negative attitude etc. I have learned to do what I need/want in spite of feelings. Better day at meditation and my hell app. Been reading journals so much good stuff and yet still so far to go. What is with the cold showers - you people are crazy. I live for my warm showers! Its my reward for getting out of bed, now complicated by 7 min hell and meditation. Got my hubby doing it with me in the morning now too and son just downloaded the app. oh day 5 of the second 90 days. we should call this second 90 day something. The first 90 day detox is to just get free. This second one is getting habits and goals in place and working out the bugs to make it happen and figuring out how to live. That's it - The 90 day life building. Grateful: Warm showers Meditation back to I hope practice helps statusLife goes onThe sound of thunderPersistance

The book " The power of habits" is really helpful and a great read. Many of us have read or are reading it on this forum. I wonder did you substitute the gaming habit for the smoking habit? Many move our addictions around instead out and out finding healthier ways to cope with stress to help us through those tough times. It is good that you are not giving up and that determination will help you especially as you learn better tools to get through tough times. Peace

I would second the resources that Cam suggested. Many of us did not quit our first go around so do not give up. Accept what happened without self-blame. Acknowledge it did not work as you intended then look at why it happened without judgement. Was it stress? boredom? Cravings? etc. Than make a plan and try again. Keep building until you get where you want. It is only failure when you give up. Cam has a book Respawn and many vids to help in the early knucklebiting days. Hang in there!

Positive step in the right direction. Just take it one step at a time and you will get there!

Day 4 - better day at work but overall attitude still in the rough. Life is rather full of frustration atm. It will pass and I will keep plugging at my habits. Meditation was rather awful today. My mind was racing so much, I could not even "hear" the headspace guy. I restarted the session 3 times before I gave up. Hurt my neck so I gave myself a pass on the 7 minute hell routine, although, I wonder if it might help the neck to loosen up and hurt less. Plan to do it tomorrow though don't want to lose my progress. We are three people short at work and having trouble hiring anyone. No allowed days off or vacation except rarely. Been going on for 9 months now. Losing hope it will change and so tired. Realizing, I may have to change jobs which will require selling home and moving to another state probably. Don't really want to face that and hope it changes as I like our place and the community is great for our children. Will be setting a deadline in my mind soon of fixed by then or implement exit strategy. Grateful: No gaming urges although hopeless on work situation atmThat I have workI have a homeThat putting one foot in front of the other gets you throughSleeping cats

Day 3 - I know I know but I could not resist it! It's so fun to watch that number go up! I think we need a survey how many gamer types have OCD lol. Work was rough and I was cranky. Having a bad day and getting more upset by the moment. Stopped myself and said, It is busy and stressful but I chose to have a good day anyway. Kind of proud of that moment. Normally, I would come home and game the bad day away until the wee hours of the night/morning. Tonight, I ate cause never had time while working, read some posts then I am going to watch a mindless but fun show of Naked and Afraid. I think these people are crazy but it is interesting to watch them overcome such physical hardship and the mental determination to do so. I never really watched shows before so kind of enjoying some from time to time. Did my habits before work even though shifted times. I just shift when "morning" is and go forward. Grateful: Reframing thoughtsHot flour tortillas with butterMindless shows to chillBeing home after work

Joining the June Jamboree of Just doing it! Albeit a bit late!

The intensity you bring to your projects in game design is a strength and can help you on your journey. It seems like your searching for a new direction or perhaps to confirm if your direction still fits. It is ok to change mid stream in life as you grow and discover what works better or does not work. It is hard to change but when I acknowledge where I was headed did not work anymore and I let it go, I have not regretted it. Hang on and you got this.

Congrats! It is awesome to read of your success and that you are fired up for living!

Welcome you have made the first step and there is indeed hope.

I like your new quote and thanks for the wisdom!

Transitions - I have one in real life and I realize now I have one in recovery. A good one that I just did not recognize it at first. I am neutral on my dark souls feelings because I am neutral. It does not matter to me. I can play wow....I don't want to and I had more fun on my 3 mile walk (up from 2 miles) today. I did my 7 minutes of hell and made progress. I savor that small victory. I don't need a counter although it was one of favorite things and a great tool for maintaining my 90 days. The reason being - my focus is not playing games anymore and now my focus is shifting from not playing games to doing life stuff. Which is of course the purpose of recovery. The counter keeps gaming in the forefront and does not let them fade. It is just something to do for fun occasionally and right now they don't sound all that fun. That is a victory too and I am going to savor it also