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Listen to Cam and James Discuss eSports In Episode 2 of Gaming the System!

TwoSidedLife

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About TwoSidedLife

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  1. Never donated anything like that, but I donate items (If it's still good) instead of throwing them out. When i'm older and get a career, I know a lot of people and organisations i'd love to reguarly donate to
  2. The next step to go I reckon (While detoxing) would be learning more about self development. I watched a lot of youtube vids abt that before I knew to come here and seek help (While I was still getting high everyday). But you can also read or listen to podcasts if you prefer that (I just had lots of time back then since I rarely went to school). Plenty of topics on meditation, self discipline, social skill advice ect. Tho since you're into business, I found business ppl were the best advice givers for life too. I'd definitely recommend the channels "Valuetainment" and "Brian Tracy". Goal setting should also be something you should focus on - Learn about it so you can apply it properly and it'll be easier for you. Advice I hear over and over from those kinds of ppl (Online at least) is that a good career and money are not what they looked for. They just followed their passions and money came along with it as a bonus. In other words, the key isn't to focus on money, but to focus on your actual self. I think it's awesome you know in some sense exactly what you want and that you've taken the action to be here!
  3. Yeah I agree that it helps advance your skills in some way and challenges you, so I don't think its dumb. I think the difference is that - Gaming can't translate smoothly and properly into real life skills. Whereas if you learnt a lot about a specific program, you make yourself more valuable money and career wise. I wanted to get more into making music digitally, mixing it and ect. i've got great music skills irl with the electric guitar. But i'm very new to mixing it digitally and all, I have to learn it from scratch (But later up that learning curve, my music skills'll make it easier). Messing around with just my guitar from all the times I was grounded was also how I got so good. The learning process is never perfect. Messing around while 'trying' to learn is also a way of having fun too - It improves your memory which helps you learn better. I tried programming, i've stopped for now because I don't have any personal benefits from it, don't really enjoy it and don't have any projects i'm wanting to do with it. Currently am doing digital image manipulation tho and i've been enjoying it, my whole goal with that is to sell designs on a website and earn some passive income. I do school online, so i'm stuck at home and in front of a computer a lot. My only activities away from it are just doing chores, going a bit beyond those chores, exercising, playing an instrument, some gardening (At the least, i'll just go outside and pick up garbage) and working on some house projects I came up with. When I get the money, i'm gonna buy some books too to read outside. Reflect on yourself, find your morals, what matters to you and set yourself some small goals. I feel fulfilled morally just from making our house cleaner and looking nice for my family (Who're usually out most of the time), even tho before I hated doing any kind of chore. Been thinking about volunteering and i'll work up to that at some point. Also try out some things that you've never done to see if they interest you. From what I can tell, you sound passionate about living a more connected life.
  4. @goodvibes I just remember seeing a past post from the mods saying it wasn't possible right now because of the site's design/coding or something. But could be possible, since NoFap's site seems similar and they've got badges there. Should've mentioned too, I track using the app Quitzilla on Android (Free version only lets you track 2 habits at once, pretty sure it's only on Android too).
  5. @Sarma I didn't do anything too extreme (At least in my opinion lol). I was addicted to pot for 3 yrs, smoked it everyday and found it very hard to quit. My life just revolved around smoking it and getting more whenever I could. I finally quit when I started pursuing my own interests and hobbies after leaving my friends behind. Felt like I had lost touch with myself and didn't know myself anymore. Other than that, i've done ecstacy a few times (once w ice), oxy once and abused whatever prescriptions I could find (So nah, i've never done hallucinogens or anything harder than that. Wasn't addicted to anything else other than pot). I think it made me a really passive person and didn't allow me to express my full true opinion on lots of things, which was something a lot of ppl knew me for before I started smoking. That + my gaming habit took a big toll on my education and left me with no positive friendships later on. Yeah I think the whole identity around gaming thing is hard too. I'm a bit of an outlier tho, I didn't have any irl gamer friends and nobody knew I gamed. I've also never been into getting the newest games, keeping up with gaming news or watching gameplays/streams. So i've never considered myself as the average gamer. I quit multiplayer about 4 yrs before I started StopGaming, was mainly addicted to singleplayer games. Didn't game as much when I was doing drugs tho, but whenever I was by myself it was all I did. Absolute slave hahaha.
  6. Use to have a lot of friends, but i've changed since then and adjusting to a more regular normal life (No drugs lol). Kinda just backtracked to 'making ammends' with my family for all the trouble I caused and the yrs I ignored them (Currently learning to accept others). Haven't gone about making friends yet, been doing school online for 1.5 yrs now. The best way I made meaningful connections was just by focusing on myself and doing my own thing. Friends just come naturally when you do what you want, instead of focusing on others. As for socialising, I keep in mind that everyone knows something I don't. They know something that's likely to interest me, so I listen for that. Also don't ask questions or join in if you genuinely aren't interesting in listening to any answers. Truly listening is really key to having conversation - It's how you naturally come up with questions and whatever else. Connecting more with current friends tho, isn't something that can be fast tracked or rushed. Try learning more about listening skills and applying that, it takes you a long way (Even if you already think you're a good listener). If you have a personal interest in something, invite a friend to come with you. That way it's fine if they don't want to go (You'll still go / Invite someone else) and you won't be doing it just for another person (Ppl pleasing). Yeah, as selfish as it sounds, just do you. Edit: As for women, if you haven't checked it out yet, have a look at NoFap. But the general advice is that you shouldn't specifically look for that - Let that come to you while you do your own thing.
  7. My psych advised me that I have a dissociative disorder. But made the choice with me not to refer me since i'm high functioning and being recognised with a disability wouldn't make my life easier anyway. I don't take medications also and don't intend to. I've also had drug induced psychosis before for about two weeks, it went away on its own without any outside intervention. I've been dealing with lots of general anxiety for years. Recently i'm taking on not being so anxious in public. What started my journey was quitting pot. Found StopGaming not long after. I've got this mindset of wanting to improve, learn and apply advice about self development. I've been taking steps to cut out other things that don't benefit me too like smoking. I also left behind all my friends at that time, since they only enabled my drug habits and didn't have any will at all to be something more (No goals, no aspirations). The two things I recommend are self reflection whenever you feel lost (What are you goals? Aspirations? What action are you gonna take to solve your problem?). goal setting and meditation. The more you practice meditating, the more control you have over yourself. Sounds strange, but I feel like now I can use that anxious energy and turn it into productive energy. I've heard similar things from NoFap too. For the 'Schizophrenia' level things - You might be familiar with psychosis or symptoms alike to it (Although it is pretty rare to experience, something like 2% of the world?). I'm no doctor ofc. I wouldn't know how Schizoprenics handle pre psychosis either (Since their onset is sudden, probs why they req. meds). Tho with my disorder, I start having those symptoms only when i'm extremely stressed (There's also no medication specifically for DD). Might be helpful for you to practice 'grounding techniques' - They're usually what I do in pre-psychosis, but I think they'd help for other disorders too (Tho usually apply to symptoms of losing touch with reality). If you are familiar with psychosis, I use this STEPI indicator test to help let me know if something truly is changing (Usually your cognition slows down to a point where you won't realise without the aid of a test to tell you). I've also heard psychosis like symptoms can come from other disorders too like types of anxiety including OCD (But the same principles apply that it's not extremely common). I've been doing Cognitive Brain Therapy for a few years. Very helpful. Helps me become a better person by challenging my behaviours, thoughts ect. in a contructive logical way. Was afraid at first that it'd permanently change my personality lol. Self diagnosing isn't worth the effort tho. When I was younger I knew I had something, searched a lot about it and was overall just a waste of time and source of anxiety.
  8. Playing one game won't 'solve' the urge for another. You might be looking at it in the wrong way too. Don't focus on the aspect or word of 'quitting', think of it as stopping until you can get to 90 days. At the same time, during the detox you can't solely focus on "When it's over, I can game again!". Quitting something and battling an addiction isn't about focusing on killing that addiction - it's about focusing on building your life in it's absence. Not sure why there's a direct link to a twitch stream in your post either, makes me kinda think you're trolling. In the end though, only you can help yourself, its your life and your choice if you want to quit or not. There'll always be support here, but we can't help you if you don't want to be helped. If anything, you should write down and reflect on why you wanted to quit in the first place.
  9. Sounds to me like you're having FOMO (Fear of missing out), since you're relapsing when the 'season' resets. Unlike life, we don't have that kinda hard reset or fresh start. That might also be something that's drawing you in, only you can know for yourself. I've personally never experienced FOMO with gaming, but know it's a driving factor that keeps ppl addicted to today's popular online games (I quit multiplayer 3 years before I found and started StopGaming). Theres a lot of resources out there specifically for understanding and overcoming FOMO. Here's just one article I found from Psychology Today. Also, welcome to the forums!
  10. There's no badges here yet sadly.
  11. @The radtech Yeah, there comes a time when self reflection really helps in life. Sit down with yourself, some pen and paper - Just start writing how you feel about it. Why you should try 90 days, why you don't think it'll benefit you ect. You might not know until you try, you might find out getting to 90 was easy and effortless (In that case, i'd say you don't have a problem with gaming). How many hours did you use to play? I'd usually be around 12-15 and can't go less than 3. I've been with stopgaming for a year now, most days I got to so far has been 66 (Twice). Your choice to quit gaming might not even be gaming related. Maybe you're looking for something else out of life - Like self improvement in general. Even if you're not addicted, I reckon stopping for 90 days can help build willpower and discipline.
  12. That stopping is the hardest part The thought of relapsing is better than actually gaming Relapsing might be a sign that you're not challenged, rewarded or progressing enough with your goals Share your lessons learnt from relapse
  13. Never really been into it, years ago my friends recommended me a few things to watch and I enjoyed it tho. Probably typical stuff everyones heard of. Full Metal Alchemist, Tokyo Ghoul, Death Parade, Death Note, Psychopass, that kinda genre/stuff. Haven't pursued it further, I don't really watch TV shows or movies anymore. There's a few I don't remember the name of and a few I liked but never finished watching (I tend to forget plots really quick). Tho i've always wondered what the appeal is? Maybe that there's just lots of choice? I like that pretty much anyone can make it (In Japan? Haha) and it seems like more of a free market imo, not too sure.
  14. Day 4 The cravings aren't as strong as every other run i've had. I'm having lots of fun doing my own thing. Currently i'm just working on making art to sell online (Passive income). I've never been really into art, but i'd consider myself good at it. I reckon anyone can do it. Still on the search for a system that works with scheduling. It'll probs come down to experimentation again. Been thinking deeper on my opinions about gaming. I reckon there's a problem with how games are today. The game industry imo is alike to drug dealers. Rather than creating quality content and selling it one off - there's much more interest in having 'repeat customers'. I overall disagree with how addictive systems are used to generate profit. Video games are kinda like phones. Phones were created to help us be productive. Except that there's a huge lack in inherent productive capabilities. Random, yeah. Tho i've always been the kinda person to share my opinions freely.
  15. Breaking the cycle is tough, but you're here talking it about it now, so congrats! I'm an ex-pot user (not legal in Aus), for 3 yrs I smoked heavily everyday and didn't take any breaks (Only forcibly when I couldn't get ahold of any, but would be spending all my time 'sober' trying to get more). I'm 1 and a half yrs sober now. I only quit pot cause I found something much more important to me. It's something that really connected with me on a personal level, where I felt like I NEED to do it. Before then, I distanced myself from my buddies (We haven't been friends since) and began focusing on myself. I did that because I felt like I was losing myself, not staying true to who I was and was nothing how I was before. I just kept smoking alone, but started to explore all day - what I want to learn/know? What do I want to get out of life? What do I think is cool? It was like a process of re-discovering myself. The best thing about it was I was never focused on quitting and actually had no intention of quitting pot. I was just so involved, excited and happy to be focusing on myself again and learning. I highly recommend you explore your interests. Especially explore on youtube if you don't know what you want to do. Watch videos about specific things you'd want to try or have interest in as a hobby. Find things you want to learn about. A next step above that would be to set yourself a goal (an intention) based around something you WANT to do. Gaming always has progression - but ppl don't really set themselves goals irl (A system of progression). As for one on one talk, i've got a counsellor (I'm a woman btw) and she's more of a life coach to me than what I expected from a counsellor (Tho i've been with her for almost 5yrs now). If you're not wanting a counsellor, surely there's some life coaches or something alike to that out there that could also help you. I'd try looking around locally first before the internet to look for one. It's hard to keep your honesty without physicallity imo.
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