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About MikeRuns

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  1. It can be easy to stay in your head and worry so much what you should do, what will someone think. Cognitive behavior therapy type exercises can help. Thinking things like if i do this, what is realistically the worst outcome? Why can do I in that situation, are my thoughts realistic? A lot of times the thoughts you have about failing are way worse than reality. Also realize a lot of people struggle with the same. People procrastinate when they know you shouldn't, etc. Your mind however, is extremely powerful and you can (it is not easy at all), force yourself to do the things you don't necessarily want to do. The more you do these types of things, the more they become apart of your routine and at some point if you stop doing it your brain will bug you wanting to know why. People do look at these, and know you are not alone. Anyone who says any of these things are easy, would be lying, but like most things in life; the harder things to do can reap the highest rewards.
  2. @Deku awesome job on completing the detox! Don't be too hard on yourself, 90 days of no gaming compared to a week or two of bad habits is still a great accomplishment! As long as you realize if you can game responsibly to do it in moderation, but if you realized you weren't able to control it after stopping, then you just need to get it out of your life. I find it interesting how you equated hanging out with family and spending time with the people who matter not as important as getting back to work. I don't to preach, but just share my own experience. You will do a lot of work in your life, and like the saying goes "No one ever wishes they worked more on their deathbed". Spending time with family and people who are important to you I believe is one of the best ways to spend time in general. All of this work is normally used to get a paycheck which is used to do more of the things you love.
  3. It’s been well over 3 months now. In general this has been an interesting journey for myself. Gaming was never really an escape for me until college. I always had fond memories of gaming with my friends or cousin because it’s just what i did as a kid and was enjoyable. Once college hit, and I started going to parties, I really wasn’t sure how to interact socially because I never really went to parties before. That’s when I started to have social anxiety and started using gaming as an escape. Fast forward til now I have done a decent amount of retrospection. 1. I am way too hard on myself and need to allow myself to live in the moment more. 2. I need to get more comfortable with talking with random people about whatever it is. Last night I was on the bus and some drunk guy started talking with me, and instead of ignoring him I engaged in conversation and it was a fun conversation. 3 I need to limit screen time, I have watched a bit more tv than I wanted to over the 90 days, but honestly I should take more of a win from that since I went 90 days without gaming which would have most likely added up to around 400-800 hours, but had much less of that on tv. I also need to stop watching random you tube videos, there are s lot of interesting things out there, but if I wanna learn something I think books are a better medium considering there isn’t and much of a distraction or a chance to get side tracked by other things on the internet. 4. I’ve read books while I was on vacation and a lot of them basically talked about living life more meaningfully, and about thinking if you really need something before getting it. I reached a point where my salary allows me to pretty much buy whatever I want and when I wanted something I would just buy it without considering the cost or if I was going to use it enough. I realize that none of those things I bought made me happpy and what i really crave in life is genuine human interaction. When I think of the control some of my possessions have over me it can be terrifying. Most people wouldn’t really be too sad if their frying pan was thrown out, but talk to me about getting rid of my gaming pc, tv, or ps4, and I’ll get anxious. Signs like that only just reinforce that I need to get rid of these things that have so much power over me. I’ve started my journey on living a more minimalist (read as living life more purposefully), and started decluttering from my room and my house all of the things I don’t use or really need. I am going to sell my gaming pc, and when i move out i think I will sell my tv and gaming consoles. I currently have a roommate and he has the furniture so if I all of a sudden got rid of my tv and speakers and consoles I feel like I’d be making him buy everything that id still use on occasion. I’ve read way more books in the past 3 months than I have in 8 years most likely. I ran a half marathon in 1:26 I didn’t game for 90 days. After the 90 days I was craving to play something one night, I did end up playing a random game on my ps4, I also installed the Witcher and played for about an hour. I then realized I wasn’t really enjoying the game/ was just playing it because people said it was a good game. I realized I was just wanting to play because I was bored. After that I reset my computer to factory defaults and started putting together pictures and parts to sell on Craigslist.
  4. I've past a month now ?about to be at 5 weeks. The no gaming part has not been to bad, but filling that time with other activities has been hard. I want to be more social, but whenever when I am in a situation to meet new people especially woman I choke or don't approach people I would like to. I made it around two weeks of no fap and then blew it, so trying to start that back up again, but allowing myself to still be pleased about the not gaming aspect. I've been still playing the piano and cooking more. I haven't really been craving any games, there are a few I am excited to be released to play to experience the story, but I will wait to see if I want to do any of that after 90 days. @giblets the qualifying time depends on how old you are, the older the higher the starting cut off time. I would make sure you are getting enough potassium and possibly make sure you are getting enough sodium in while running, I know some people who eat Salt tablets every X minutes, which I think should.help.out with the cramping.
  5. I've been feeling the same a bit, but using the same technique as you giblet, it was fun and all and enjoyable, but now I am making a choice to do X now instead
  6. There are a few ways to qualify but I am working on trying to qualify by time, which i believe for 2020 is 3 hours for the full marathon. I am not really wating for the perfect time for a marathon, I just know it will destroy my legs a lot so would rather do some shorter halves to get my speed up and back off on the speed and add more mileage for the full. My body doesn't normally do to well on high mileage so I am trying to ease into the training for the full. Not looking for the perfect shape, just a better shape. Also number 10 man that's awesome, what you shooting for for time? Haha hopefully ? Day 12-24 It's been awhile since I've posted. I've been trying to be off of my computer more when I am at home since I already use it at work so much. I haven't played any games, and I am pretty sure this has been the longest I have gone in a very very long time without playing any games. I still watch my room mate play games and talk to some co-workers about games, but am sticking to not playing them for at least 90 days. I am 100% done with MMO games or any type of competitive game for the rest of my life though, just too easy to get sucked into. I bought a record player recently and have been fiddling around with that which has been fun. I also started no fap on October 1st, shooting for 30 days, but also might make that 90 days as I think my fap habits had more of an effect on me than my gaming. Whether its a placebo effect or not I have been feeling pretty good most days even if not all days are great. I've been reading more and cooking more and doing more of other things in general. Of course sometimes i end up sitting on my ass and not doing too much sometimes, but small steps. I am in general more excited about life and leveling up myself.
  7. Currently I am trying to learn/ have learned most of To Zanarkand from FFX, The original reason I got back into piano was because I did it when I was a kid and always regretted stopping, but I also like a lot of music from video games/ anime and think it would be cool to be able to play those. It allows me to channel what I like about games in a positive way. I've been running for a long time, but haven't always been too competitive and especially recently, trying to get back into being more competitive. Always appreciate the advice, I do need to roll out more, my foam roller is collecting a bit of dust ? . I have been using Adrenalines for the past 10 years or so and always get a new pair after 400-600ish miles. I used to have an issue with heel striking a bit, but i haven't thought about it too much recently. Feel free to follow me on Strava https://www.strava.com/athletes/11995523 Day 10-12 Figured out my savings rate which was a lot easier than I thought, just needed to take the time. Need to start budgeting better in order to increase it, current goal is 50% savings rate. Mostly this week was work, come home, cook dinner, watch a bit of TV (all caught up on walking dead which is one of the few shows i enjoy watching [even if it is cheesy as hell]), and sleep. Got some piano time in but need to get more in. Played some Magic The Gathering with some friends on Friday which was nice, all of them are gamers so we end up talking about games. A lot of my friend groups have been gamers and it can be hard to branch out to others. Have some plans with some non-gaming friends tonight which should be good. 0 Video games played Watched a few hours of TV this week, but was mostly just catching up on old shows, not randomly starting new ones.
  8. Day 9 - Woke up and got out on a run around 8am, first day of a training plan I am doing. The run was overall really easy, but just taking it one day at a time. Getting injured is and has always been one of my major worries, as whenever I have gotten injured I normally end up in a pretty bad place mentally. Drank a bit too much coffee at work and had a bit too much heightened anxiety, but besides that work went well and the coffee is outta my system now and i feel much better, Work was good, finishing up a project I've spent the last 3 months on, so its nice to see that come to fruition. Came back home and pretty much browsed the web and went through a bunch of other people intro posts and journal posts. A few near future goals in order to keep myself accountable. Figure out current budge and savings rate and push that number to be 50% if not higher. Figure out trips to see family over the holidays Play piano at least 30 minutes a day and also hook back up with my teacher
  9. Damn dude, you are kicking ass currently. I read your intro post and a decent amount of your journal entries. You've gone over a month without gaming! Focus on how far you've come and how far you are going! Not every day is going to be the best or most productive, but every day is 100% more productive when you aren't playing or focused on games. You're "Post Rachel Era" post made me laugh, You can still be friends with a girl who doesn't want a relationship with you, rarely is someone ever rejecting you as a person, the same with the girl you rejected because you only thought of them as a friend. Keep focusing on improving yourself and the rest will come
  10. So glad you are still going man! you got this!
  11. It's great you are starting to accomplish your goals and like you said you need to find new ones in order to still stay hungry and focused. You also need something to anchor you in case things do happen. If your girlfriend broke up with you or cheated on you would you go back at all to gaming or do you have a plan? Sounds like a lot of your feel good and happy emotions are coming from that relationship, just make sure you do have a plan for if bad shit happens. No need to dwell on it, but if you don't have a plan you might fall back into old habits, and you want to be in control of your emotions, not let them control you. Glad you are working on the web design, a lot of it is just grinding at it, takes time to learn all of the different skills necessary.
  12. Hey Pete! Don't focus too much on the past! Just focus now on the future and what you will do with the time you have now!
  13. Hey William, I struggled with league of legends a lot as well. It was always such an easy time sink and way to escape for me as well for me in college. Glad you are committing! You also aren't here 3 years too late, you are here right on time! It's never too late to make a change, everything in your life has lead you up to each point which gave you knowledge.
  14. Hey Everyone I'm MJ(Michael Junior), My intro and story is Here, it is more of a brain dump and stream of conscienceless than a proper piece of reading material. Here is my journal for my journey to stop gaming forever, but started with 90 days. No matter what stage you are at in life, it is never too late to change, and only compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not who you were 5 years ago or who someone else is today! Day 1 was September 17th, 2018 I am now on Day 8 Days 1-8 I started this journey with a few goals in mind. I would like to qualify for the Boston Marathon, do a Half Iron-man with one of my cousins, and Learn to play the piano a lot better (A lot of the music I do enjoy is from games I used to play, but overall that music has been a positive impact on my life more than a negative one). I've been going to the gym twice a week to get my upper body back to shape. I have lost a lot of upper body muscle from when I was in college. I have been able to get a lot of productive chores done around the house and knocked out some tasks I have been wanting to get done. I have been watching a bit more TV than usual, but I am adjusting to a new life change so I am giving myself a little leeway there. I was able to knock a lot down off my email inboxes. I used to always have a lot of unread emails (57000), I deleted a ton of emails and am now trying to keep my inbox low just so I can stay on top of it. Last week I baked some chicken and veggies for dinner most of the week and yesterday I used a cast iron pan to sear a steak and it turned out pretty good which I was happy with, it's one of the techniques in cooking i've been trying to get better at. since I enjoy steak. Day 8 - Went to the gym in the morning, then to work, came back from work and heated up some food and then sat down and wrote my introduction to this forum and then this first journal entry. I signed up for some coaching to get some help on swimming, and biking for triathlons as I have been a runner most of my life. I am looking forward to getting back into a routine for running and competing again!
  15. Hey everyone, I have been a gamer for a long, long, time, since I was 5 and am now 25. I have gamed many many many many many hours of my lifetime. I grew up in a Suburban Neighborhood, had friends that I would hang out with outside and then after it got late I would end up going inside and playing some video games. I was always fascinated with technology and one Day my dad connected the computer to our TV to use as a monitor and I though that was such a cool thing. I never thought too much of playing games, I used to bond with my cousin over gaming. We would hang out at each others houses either playing some kind of video game together or playing a similar game in the same room. I remember whole summers would go buy and we would just wake up, game, and then go to sleep when we were younger. As a kid i never thought much of it and my parents didn't think it was a problem as long as I kept my grades up (which I did). Friends would come over and we would play games together, so for me at least when I was a kid it was just what I did with my friends when they would come over. One year I moved away to a different state and lived very far from my friends that i went to school with, I believe that is when my gaming really changed. I would game all the time when I wasn't at school. I had a bowling league I would do on the weekends which i enjoyed, but besides that it was just gaming. The games i started at this time were Diablo 2 and Warcraft 3 (Which I have a lot of fond memories about playing with my cousin and other friends to this day). Games with no real end in sight and so many different games to play (Warcraft 3 custom maps). I eventually moved back to where I used to be, but I think i became more interested in gaming. When I moved back that year I also started playing Basketball which I am thankful for or else I might have ended up a much different route in my life. I had a lot of friends interested in Basketball which we would play all the time at recess and the summer between my 7th and 8th grade year, everyone single day we would go to the local park and play basketball and our team improved so much that following year. Still after I was done with sports I would come home and play games. I started high school and started doing Cross Country and Track (also thankful for what as it has drastically changed my life for the better) ,and after practices I would either go home and play games or have friends come over and play games or go to someone's house and play games. I was never too interested in drinking and partying, so i always defaulted to games. My mother passed away my sophomore year of high school which was not easy on me, but I still kept it together. Towards the end of high school I started playing league of legends, and I think it was around this time that gaming started to change for me. I Started college at a D3 school running Cross Country and Track. I didn't actually game too much the first semester of college, I was trying to go out to parties and meet people. I had a lot of social anxiety around girls and always felt weird meeting new people. I think once I had some bad experiences with rejection I started moving back to gaming as more of an escape from reality than something I used to truly enjoy with my friends and cousin. I started slacking off with running and never really improved in college and didn't compete much either (a sport I truly do love). Come sophomore year I had some issues and ended up going on anti depressants, these issues (anxiety and depression), made me go full on onto gaming. I would game all the time when I had the chance, I didn't really know how to deal with my problems and that time and gaming was a great escape. I missed out on a lot of my good college years due to my problems with depression and gaming. I was able to work through my issues eventually and graduated and ended up at a fairly nice software engineering job. For the past 2-3 years since I have graduated something with gaming changed the most it has ever changed. I played some games that I got so much entertainment and enjoyment from that other games just weren't as fun anymore. Games like ARK, and PUBG i have poured a lot of time into. These games have so many reward systems and so many feelings of a rush that it really dulls your reward center or at least makes you need a lot more in order to get the same rush. A few months ago I was starting to realize that gaming was no longer something I truly enjoyed like I used to, it was just an activity I did when I was bored, an activity that kept my bored because I wouldn't make plans so I would game and that cycle kept repeating itself. I used to believe I would always be a gamer and that I would have to marry someone who was tolerant or who also enjoyed gaming because I wouldn't have too much else in common with them. I have seen some of Cam's videos before and thought I had everything under control and I attempted limiting myself to 1 hour a day of gaming. It was beneficial as that hour I gamed I enjoyed it more as I was limited as opposed to before where i would just binge or play after work until i slept. That didn't keep up and then i started playing games more again. Recently I was playing the Black Ops 4 open beta with my cousin and I wanted to stop playing at 1 pm, and I kept playing until 5PM, and that is when I decided to call it quits. Gaming for me was no longer bringing me true joy or really giving me the connection with people I truly desired, and more importantly it was getting in the way of more important goals in my life. I could most likely write many pages about a lot of my life story and my history with gaming, which at some point I might try to do. I am currently on day 8 of the 90 day detox and I am saying to myself I will never be playing video games again and 90 days is just a starting point. I am trying to live a more balanced and healthier life. I have actually had the happiness emotion this passed week. It feels as if some kind of chains I had on myself were lifted. I accepted that the games I was excited for I will never play, that those experience I won't have, but I will have different experiences and more fulfilling ones. I realized that gaming isn't going anywhere. If when I am older and in a different position I can always attempt to pick up playing games again, but I don't plan on it. This ended up being a gigantic wall of text so if you read it all I really appreciate it. If anyone has any questions or wants to chat feel free to message me. I am going to go crack open a journal