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-n.g-

Kill it with Fire and Brimstone!

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Day 1.

Welp, where do I start?

Hello. I would like to keep myself anonymous until I am ready, if ever. I will keep this journal as short and sweet as I can where I can, my head is a bit messed up right now. Best to drip it out slowly otherwise it will be an incoherent mess.

-I am tired as shit. Not just physically but mentally as well in every way. I think I have worn myself out from gaming finally. Yesterday I deleted my game-well over 200+GB gone poof like that, steam is gone too. I did this all after opening the Pandora's box of gaming and searching for the total number of hours I have spent on steam. I have for some time wanted to give up and the relapses have been crap but this time it feels different. After seeing that something just clicked and I proceeded to delete all my games with a second thought. The last game I deleted was the one I had put over 2k hours in over 2 years and I stared at that blankly for perhaps a full 10 seconds. 

-Today is the planning day, although I originally woke up not know what to do with myself. I can only describe my current situation and mental state as an ugly, precarious rut. I opened up a sketchbook wrote my first realistic set of goals to aim for. Everything feels like going back right back to basics. perhaps I will take a picture of everything I write in that book instead of typing, if I can find a camera. I would like to think that my goals are simple but I know that prospect of the work involved daunts me

 

In the short term:

-Re-learn French I fucked up that subject at school. I can still remember the excitement of wanting to learn a new language when I was younger.

-I bought a plastic model kit to make a week ago. A BMW Isetta bubble car, small things that try to do something completely different amuse me. I started it today and will be looking to fill most of my time doing it. I am jobless and had to put my university degree on hold, horribly overdraft, haven't been out of the house for 9 or more months and eat a meal a night; just one. I go through these episodes of extreme anger where I destroy things, recently I have put a hole in a wall after launching a small cupboard at it (the cupboard survived, I guess IKea do know make some quality things after all). These follow moments of extreme sadness where I have often entertained suicide even though another part of my brain knew it what stupid, I cannot stop it when it happens, all the while feeling weak and permanently lethargic.

-Get back into drawing, I am, or was a architecture student. This will be my second time I have had to put a stop to university. I fear I am building up quite history for myself. I am hoping to make some money out of that, as one of the consolations of gaming was becoming friends with a business startup involved in vinyl prints.

-Learn to cook healthy. I eat high carb foods because they are the easiest to do. Changing my diet should hopefully make me less tired and feeling smashed after every meal.

-Drum up the courage to go cycling and leave the house finally. not a heavy work out, just 5-10 minutes at first. perhaps in the mornings, though for anyone who cares to read any tips on how to tackle stomachs that react really badly to the cold would be massively appreciated.

-finish reading the books I bought:

re-read Le Corbusier's Towards New Architecture

Carlo Scarpa's life works

Find and read, or listen to the Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy

damn there are at least 5-6 scattered around my floordrobe for a room I have forgotten the names of.

Clean my room.

 

-I have 5 long term goals so far:

-Get back to university for 2018-2019

-Get a stable source of income before then

-Move out of this shitheap closer to my university, the commute was exhausting and the time wasted on it was precious.

-Never play another video game or watch another porno flick every again. Video games have had the strongest pull on me.

-Keep my technology usage on the computer to a minimum. 

 

2 very long term goals:

-Start a business in product design and architecture

-Piss off out of the rat race of London and go sailing out around the world in the winters. My brain thinks better when there is some sunshine.

 

 

Everything seems unrealistic at the moment. I definitely know I cannot think clearly at all.

Thats it for now, I hope I haven't made too much a fool of myself.

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I am impressed at how well organized you are alternative activities and long term goals. It took me weeks of gaming detox to get to that point and it's still a work in progress. I think you sound very motivated, ng, best of luck getting started!

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Day 2

@Mettermrck. Truth be told I have been fantasising about stopping for some time-"what would I do if I stopped gaming? What I can realistically achieve?"-for months in between gaming. Gaming has been for some time compulsive but not fun in the truest sense of the word.

@Cam cheers for setting up this website and youtube channel, I am not alone in everything I have done right up to the tiniest detail.

I suppose I should tell you a bit about miself.

22 yr/o, gaming for as long as I can remember, made the leap to PC just before university, racking up about 265 days gaming on steam in a little under 4 years and that doesn't even include offline mode. I don't even want know how many hours I have put into consoles. I was mainly a FPS gamer and enjoyed horde mode and single player games. I 

By now I should have passed through university and got a job. I dropped out when I was 19, did nothing in that time and reapplied at 20 and have postponed it at 21. to know two years of my life amounted to nothing, I think about it so much that I am almost blase in my thoughts about how I frame it.

I have in the past tried to stop gaming. I thought I could moderate it-but nope. I tried it limiting myself 1-2 hours a week, but it didn't work. So I cut it out, the longest I lasted was 5months, with my studies keeping me busy enough to think too much about it. I went back to it in the holidays thinking I could get off it just like that and went all out.I thought I was in control, I could moderate myself but it didn't work out. I went into my second year thinking I could do it, ran into a little hardship and fell back into my old habits over night. I felt and still feel a little pathetic for caving that easily.

I was never really like this. I wasn't just a gamer, I was a swimming captain, sailor, straight A student, played piano, trumpet and did martial arts. I was still a socially awkward nerd and was bullied in school. I was brought in a family most would call stable and I certainly would call comfortable. I was sent to one of the top private schools in the UK, my parents thought by shelling out a bit more money from their savings taken from a small business they had sold just before the recession I would be bullied less, turns out the bully was just done by reasonably intelligent kids instead described as "banter" they called it. I tried in my school years to fit in, no point , they are just a different society altogether. I grew up with builders daughters and taxi drivers sons; not the offspring of stockbrokers, middle managers and multi-millionaire business owners.

I regret trying and should have carried on trying as best I could in my studies, those kids could understand things in a heartbeat, it would take me 3 reads and many notes to understand some things. So i shrivelled away gaming, continuing to be bullied and lagging behind over time. I was amazed by the worlds people could make in games and how I could control them, I was heavily controlled by my parents and school, so when ever I got the chance to take on big independent task I would jump at it, those were always the best times and consequently I got the best grades from those.

That is all passed history now. I typed that all up to kill time. My mind at the moment feels like a block has replaced my brain and even reading is a lot of effort. I am half way through the day and I am already fantasising about games. To tackle it I spent time enacting my plan, though I am tallying the minutes I spend on the internet. My go-to if I can not game is the web.

I have created a little exercise or coming up with a new idea every day and putting into my book. 15 minutes and it can be a reaction to a video on youtube from a channel called the Great Big Story. Just one video. I have cut out reading the news and will only be sticking to listening documentaries while I work on scale model Isetta or watching one per day. I will be tallying  the time I spend on the computer. I will make one exception and that is for any help with duolingo which i will be learning in the morning and then in the evening if I feel like it.

I have already worked on the model for a few hours and am stuck between trying to needing a nap or reading my first book in months. I plan to start my first french lesson in the evening, nothing long, perhaps 10-15minutes. the rest of the time finishing the second paint cotes*. When it gets too dark I will start drawing up designs laptop skins I think.

Right now I am tired and dehydrated. My sleeping pattern has been poor to the least. I must have had a little over 5 hours sleep last night. I am still afraid of people, groups and I do not know why. My eating habits are still poor but at least I bothered to take a shower this morning and brush my teeth. I haven't cleaned my teeth properly since god knows when.

I suppose that next Monday or earlier I should get some black bags and bin everything, maybe then I will find my camera and my phone, wherever they are. For now I think I will choose a small nap before I do anything else, I cannot even edit properly, my brain feels like its hit a wall after the first paragraph. I'll come back with a tally for the number hours I put into using the computer. 

 

*I am using a windowsill as a desk for now. my real desk is broken and there is no where to put it in any case, I can see exactly 4 A4 sized spots of carpet on my floor.

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Sleeplessness was a big symptom when I first detoxed. I think 5 hours was a max and I preferred sleeping on the couch so I could be around other people. If you hang in there, these symptoms will ease. I too experienced bullying in school and I was also hooked on single player PC gaming.

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Day 3

Today has been a slow day, painful even. I woke up, took a shower again, made food. My poor sleep meant readjusting my timetable, though I am still working on it. I decided that this morning, to experiment with making a hot a lunch meal for when I start going to work.

A thought had crossed my mind that a hot lunch food flask would be useful for the future. I don't know why I never thought of it before. When I was at university I would either starve or spend too much money on crap from the high street shops. I have a tendency to overthink the wrong things in life come to think of it. The tally for the pc I would guess would be upwards of 5 hours, excluding useful hobbies and projects.

This morning up to now it will be more. My French lesson (right from the basics apparently-une chat, la fille, l'homme, le garcons, Il est, tu est etc etc)  I noticed even the simplest things I was making mistakes in. I was not noticing things right in front of me or being able to remember very well, I will just be repeating that tomorrow then.

The urge to play hasn't felt so bad today, but that was because I decided to restore my computer. I don't know why, I just wanted to install MS office to make it easier to write these posts out-something strange occasionally happen and my typing enables a sort of insert key mode-even though the insert key doesn't exist on my keyboard. Speaking of hardware, I will also take out the HDD to make it harder to install games. Maybe later I will get a small SSD for music and work when I can afford it. Thinking straight with money has been hard to say the least, brain fog I suppose. Simple things have a hard time clicking.

So I spent most of today reworking the computer programs into something I could be more productive on. I don't think the time place of this task was productive in itself, I think I am doing it to replace my need for gaming (hence the reason I want to absolutely minimise my computer usage) because I as far as urges are going, not feeling much. I did start dreaming about gaming. 

In any case, this has resulted in postponing any plans I had. I think I will try to clean a small part of room-even bringing the black bags in was a small victory, how the hell did come to this?-even though my eyes hurt from staring at the computer all day. Still, I am not gaming and the result is a computer without an occasionally disappearing cursor loaded up with software I have been abandoning and meaning to learn.

On a more amusing note every time I put in a new entry on here I think of a song- "The Psychiatrist is In" by God Help the Girl (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaE763wuF84)  a musical project that ended in a movie I will never watch. The singer adopts the persona of two different people, but it may as well be me having a conversation with myself. I have had therapy in past, I was not close to being as honest with myself as I have done in these 3 entries purely out of denial and embarrassment.

Anyways, I will be spending the rest of the evening off the pc and doing what I set out to do.

 

Cheers for reading my nonsense you mad person. I will be back tomorrow. 

 

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I think PC gaming is easier to resist than console or mobile because it takes time to install the game, especially if you have Steam and have to wait for a long download. Keep it simple the first few days as work through the withdrawal. Celebrate and recognize small victories!

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Day 4

11:06am

I have recently got up and decided to clean my room. Well I say “got up”-I was awake at 4am and ended up on the computer searching SSDs for little reason for hours on end. Hours just to ask a question-what SSD is the right size for me? –That is a 5 minute search! (still the cheapest option) I don’t have the money for it! Why did I have the urge to dump time into such inane bollocks?

I have decided to start keeping tabs as well on how long it takes to right a segment of this journal right here too, It should make it easier to count the time on the PC. Let us call 11.06am point 0 from where my tally starts.

I did another lesson in French. I think I will do it again in the evening. I enjoyed it a little more than I did yesterday. If I can make myself think of that as a videogame my goodness I would ace it. If I was able to memorize every glitch, every shortcut and exploit in Borderlands 2 for speed running, I can bloody well memorize a language.

Took another shower this morning, cooked food, again cooked lunch in a flask-I bought a proper lunch flask on a whim yesterday instead of stuffing food into a drinking container. One day I will make the steps to get out of being in the room all the time. I watched a couple of videos while I ate lunch of the Great Big Story, then I started tearing up for no apparent reason- fell asleep there and then and woke up some time later. Right now I am clearing my room. I don’t know how long I have been at it since my clock stopped working a few days ago I figured I needed a quick rest.

I have hoarded a lot of paper as a student over a number of years. I realise that I just buy new paper every project I have and the old stuff builds up dust and crinkles. My old primary school across the road could do with the materials I thought, given the Govt. budget cuts to education here, much better than chucking. Again, it is something that has never occurred to me until now. I also found a gamepad I had paid almost no attention to until recently. I should make an account on ebay/gumtree and sell the lot. I always liked the idea of living on a few very high quality things rather a lot of tat. No idea how to achieve that but we shall work that out later. I have never sold anything online before.

I am still thinking about gaming but it’s a loud echo in the back of my mind. Perhaps the SSD thing was because it was still thinking I would be gaming-hell no.

Its 11.36 and I’ll be signing off for now. I’ll check in later this evening.

 

5.30pm

Part of the room is organized. Things are getting there slowly. I still thinking I am over doing on the computer consumption though. I always seem to find something search up, I cannot keep to one track. I think I will limit myself to 1 hour connected to the internet tomorrow. All while clearing I kept getting distracted and angry with myself. Had the crave thinking about anything even tiny, gaming related. Twitch, Discord, gamestores. So I decided to make an email I couldn’t remember and move all my known gaming haunts to that and throw away the key to it. I feel better doing that. I better get back to my model car. The paint has dried enough to stick bits together. Every time I get a strong craving, break another chain.

 

Computer time tally: 6hours+ I was searching crap while cleaning. Next time some music in the headphones I promise.

5.47

pm

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What's SSD? Cleaning is a great way to give yourself self-confidence and keep busy.

Solid state drive for storage. Its a much faster, much more shock resistant and completely silent storage device compared to a hard disk drive. Only downside is expense:storage. Fortunately for the same cost as a good 1tb hdd, I can get a smaller ssd that will prevent me from downloading games again. At the moment I have 40gb left on the one with my operating system in it which is isn't much and to greatly increase the life of the ssd I want to leave empty. 

Edited by -n.g-
I suck at grammar

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Day 5

 

5.49amà

 

Almost a week. I used to not keep track of time. Its Monday today. Went to bed at 9pm (I cannot remember when I went to bed that early) and woke up at 1am and did some more cleaning.

 

I bought some microfiber cloths and some windex to help clean my room. I produced 3 black bags worth and I have only cleaned the easy 3rd. Broke my drawing compass (£23) which I was planning to use so ordered a replacement as well. Suddenly felt a crave and stopped searching dead, must have been a good 2 minutes of doing nothing before I finally remembered what it is I was going to do. Actually useful purchases. Huh. I feel lighter now after all that.

 

I think I will go back to bed.

 

à5.55am.

 

 

 

à7pm

 

I decided to give myself an end week goal-get a regular sleeping routine going. 7pm absolutely no more staring at screens, I remember reading somewhere that your brain and eyes need 2 hours to climb down from activity before you can sleep comfortably. By 9pm sleep by 9pm. I doubt I can cut out waking up an ungodly hour so waking up at 1am-2am to cook something quick and staying awake for 40 mins is aloud. Hopefully that can settle down. 5.40am or thereabouts awake and doing a drawing exercise, shower, brush teeth and then make breakfast and lunch again.

 

Set cleaning the mid half of my room right now and added there 3rd coat on to the body of the Isetta. Past few days I have felt like a block has replaced my body and feel more exhausted.

 

Browsing time for inane nonsense 4.30hr aiming for 4 or less for tomorrow. Successfully spent some time listening to music while cleaning and reading. I will get to the 1 hour mark eventually.

 

G’night

 

à7.13pm

 

Edited by -n.g-
*decided to read some forum posts here finally too. nice encouragement for a shitty day altogether.

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Hi, I also had a lot of trouble falling asleep \ just keeping a regular sleep schedule for a while while detoxing the first times. What helped me personally at first was Yoga Nidra guided relaxations: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIl-HUHbxEI (more free recordings on yoganidranetwork.org if it tickles your fancy). Keep on it, you're doing great!

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Hi, I also had a lot of trouble falling asleep \ just keeping a regular sleep schedule for a while while detoxing the first times. What helped me personally at first was Yoga Nidra guided relaxations: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIl-HUHbxEI (more free recordings on yoganidranetwork.org if it tickles your fancy). Keep on it, you're doing great!

Thanks for the encouragement. I skimmed it earlier today, I will definitely try it tomorrow. I was never really a fan when I was younger sitting cross legged practising relaxation techniques, the image never washed with me until now.

 

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Day 6

 

8.27

Gosh almost a week already. Still cannot remember simple things or do simple things properly. This morning-always the mornings I getting a craving for it again for a quite a while and lost sight of what I wanted to do with myself. I actually forgot to take a morning shower and that threw me off the day. Took a shower this evening and everything seemed to get better again. The third part of my room is being cleaned, though I have a lot of junk on my now erected table. I have got to find a corner for all of this, split all up

-chuck out

-sell

-give to relatives

-give away to school

-bottles. I have binned a lot of plastic bottles. Literally in the hundreds, my door would spill out with them. Filled up a black bag’s worth then realised days later I could just squash them to save space-again didn’t think.

I also got a door latch. I do not know why, I think I feel safer that way. Mm, well I’ll put up as a little project, come to think of it there is a large gap in my door that could do with some sound proofing. I talk to myself a lot too now. I dream up events that won’t ever happen. I explain the same things over and over to myself. Usually random facts, occasionally wondering what I would at gunpoint, at low points, suicide. I actually looked at a plastic bag this afternoon and wondered what I would do if I put over my head, it looked like the kind of bag you would kill yourself with for some reason. That’s fucked up, I know it is. Perhaps I am over reacting, in any case its now being used to store items that might be sentimental to the rest of my family if they want it. I don’t, never used some of this stuff for over a decade.

I normally forget about what I have just said to myself not too long after, it might pop up now again though. Sometimes I say things to myself as means of accepting and internalizing something, just blurt it out without thinking. Again I cannot remember what I would say.

I hoard a lot of stuff in this room. Lots of hand-me-downs, technology like old phones, I-things lots of copies of objects I don’t need. I get given a lot of what I do not need. In recent years I have stopped asking for gifts, they just take up space for things. I don’t get much joy from opening things like I did as a kid-that is unless I bought it and know what is inside, deliveryman comes and I get excited about it all.

I am still easily side-tracked right through the last paragraph you read I was about to add that I can smell mash from my lunch flask for no reason at all.

One habit that has successfully stuck is eating again. I used to starve myself a lot. I don’t remember the longest, perhaps 5-6 days. I wouldn’t drink and the resultant constipation would be so bad that my muscles would seize up and I wouldn’t be able to inhale for a good number of seconds.

 

What am I going to do tonight? Probably clean up some more and start learning how to do technical drawing again. I have a design in mind to give the printmaker startup I talked about in an earlier post. I don’t know if he will reply to email, I hope he does because I will be damned screwed if I have to go back to steam to contact him.

8.55pm

 

Yes I know, I broke my self-imposed curfew, but this journal matters more. I couldn’t think up anything to write all day and slept for most of it.

 Signing off for the night

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Hey man, i know how that feels keeping a buttload of stuff, didn't really say a whole about when i was going to use it again. As far as not eating for more than a few days, idk. But, good luck to your printmaking dude.

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With the daily routine, I have a checklist app on my phone that I use to get stuff done (yes, even taking a shower or eating) If I have trouble remembering a particular task, I set beeping reminders so that I don't forget.

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Day 7

10.07am à

One week mark.

-woke up at 6am this time. Still waking up in the middle of the night but this time I didn’t feel I had to make some food again and went back to sleep soon after.

-Morning showers and light jazz café music while eating are very pleasurable. I am secretly an old person.

-Making lunch and breakfast is long enough to get me going. Heavy breakfast, light lunch. I have got to find something to graze on for the day. No oily fried foods in the morning or evening. Apparently these can irritate my stomach, I have grown up having terrible reactions to temperature changes and especially in autumn/spring time where it wasn’t uncommon to rush to the nearest as soon as I hopped out of the train station and stay in there for 30min+.

-I am still to some extent eating junk (KFC yesterday, leftovers will be for lunch :s). I have to stop eating freezer pizza. I might have some wild rice in the cupboard somewhere, I remember it was less heavy than normal rice. I’ll leave the attempt at paella for the weekend I think.

-Just finished clearing most of the last portion of my room. It is not a big room, just full of crap. 4 bin bags so far. My compass arrived and so did my cleaning stuff, cleaned the fan, must have been at least 1.5 years of dust on that.

-Next stop organizing the piles on my floor.

-then dusting off my ceiling, top of my wardrobe and curtains.

-move my stationary drawer nearer my table and clean that out too.

-oh yes I almost forgot, I finally put a latch on my door. Part of my mind seems at rest after that.

 

Nice short break, back to cleaning.

à10.28amà

 

à8.56pm

Oops. Welp at least I got the morning entry done. 

time spent on computer: 3.5 hours. 

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Day 7

 

10.07am à

 

One week mark.

 

-woke up at 6am this time. Still waking up in the middle of the night but this time I didn’t feel I had to make some food again and went back to sleep soon after.

 

-Morning showers and light jazz café music while eating are very pleasurable. I am secretly an old person.

 

-Making lunch and breakfast is long enough to get me going. Heavy breakfast, light lunch. I have got to find something to graze on for the day. No oily fried foods in the morning or evening. Apparently these can irritate my stomach, I have grown up having terrible reactions to temperature changes and especially in autumn/spring time where it wasn’t uncommon to rush to the nearest as soon as I hopped out of the train station and stay in there for 30min+.

 

-I am still to some extent eating junk (KFC yesterday, leftovers will be for lunch :s). I have to stop eating freezer pizza. I might have some wild rice in the cupboard somewhere, I remember it was less heavy than normal rice. I’ll leave the attempt at paella for the weekend I think.

 

-Just finished clearing most of the last portion of my room. It is not a big room, just full of crap. 4 bin bags so far. My compass arrived and so did my cleaning stuff, cleaned the fan, must have been at least 1.5 years of dust on that.

 

-Next stop organizing the piles on my floor.

 

-then dusting off my ceiling, top of my wardrobe and curtains.

 

-move my stationary drawer nearer my table and clean that out too.

 

-oh yes I almost forgot, I finally put a latch on my door. Part of my mind seems at rest after that.

 

 

 

Nice short break, back to cleaning.

 

à10.28amà

 

 

 

à8.56pm

 

Oops. Welp at least I got the morning entry done. 

 

 

time spent on computer: 3.5 hours. 

Always feels good to clean up my room to keep the mind focused and relaxed

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Day 8

 

Almost 8pm

Eh. Been listening to music and giving my room an airing for the first time. Cleaned out most of the desk, most stuff are now in neat piles. Just need to clean the rest of the top of the cupboards, give the fan another dust and enjoy the late evening sun and breeze.

I was going to write up an observation that has been nagging at me for a long while now. I started that in the early morning at 4.51am, but my thoughts are elsewhere now.

            Soon I can start putting pencil to paper. A self help guide turned up in my room. Never saw the point of those-they didn’t really reinforce things I already knew. I am more interested in why I do it than “be happy, be free!”-that kind of advice is asinine at the best of times.

            I am not sure who put it there. Perhaps the care workers who couldn’t work out my behaviour, they couldn’t give a prognosis because they were not my doctor and I wasn’t speaking to them. I still don’t for other reasons now but that is in the past.

            Concerning checklists- I write them and then things tend to end up taking on a life of their own atm as unforeseen things like the amount of dusting I have to do pop up. I know it is bad, but I will be working on then soon. I think I will end up having to write a long checklist for everything. I have taken to writing it up on the sticky notes app on the computer so I can easily edit it and then writing it down on paper to drill it in. I suppose I am taking a technology semi-detox.

I also seem to have a different song in my head almost every day that I cannot shut out of my head. https://soundcloud.com/preconceived-notions/the-loyalist-lotus-lane for the time being it is mostly welcome.

 

Time on the computer: 3.5 hours the rest was spent playing music while cleaning. I can’t really do anything much at the moment while the dust is flying around the room. I will be flicking on that Nidra relaxation exercise shown to me and see if that helps.

 

G’night

 

8.18pm

 

 

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Day 9

9:25am

I think that might work. I was once told that the most manageable thing for a person to process was a maximum of 5 detailed tasks per segment so that’s what I did. 124hr is an underestimate, I spent 4 out of the roughly 8 years I have had my steam account inactive until 2013. It reminds me every day as to why I am stopping.

 

9.30am

 

p1.png

Edited by -n.g-

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7.43pm

Cleaned everything, even the carpet, I am going to need to steam clean that at some point. Still having sleep problems, had a 2 hour nap in the afternoon, I cannot remember when I woke up. The lack of dust settling on my laptop is encouragement enough. Decided to search up the sample from the song I had in my head, turns out it was an old tune from my childhood, it was too familiar to forget.

I have been neglecting some activities especially lacking on the language learning for a couple days after realising I had needed to find a wire with a mic on the end, it doesn't seem to pick it up but I doubt wire mic will do much. Window also got cleaned so I can start painting my model again in a mostly dust free environment.

Righty, one more thing to do which is start my drawings! 

G'night

8.06pm

browsing time: ~2.5hr (yay) minus music on autoplay.

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