Jump to content
×
×
  • Create New...

Florian's Challenge


Florian
 Share

Recommended Posts

Day 12

What am I grateful for today?
1. Thank God It’s Monday! The start of the week, and I am full of energy. 
2. Getting up early. I eagerly anticipate the arrival of the next day when I fall asleep the evening before.
3. Writing. I had a “Eureka” moment today: it does not matter if you are employed or have your own business, all that matters is if the product on which you are working is valuable.
4. My morning routine. A reliable staple of a good start into the day.
5. My iPad. 70 books in print would be very heavy.
6. My internet connection. I would not be writing this here.
7. My desk. Large and spacious.
8. NoNothingNovember. I think I simply love challenges.
9. Cold showers. Invigorating, even in the cold New Jersey fall.
10. Music. It's always on my mind.

What would make today great?
If I truly did not give in to distractions. Catching yourself in the impulse is still ok, if it lasts a few seconds.
Update: pretty much done. The only time I checked a news site for more than 5 minutes was during dinner, and even then I did not like it that much.
I have suppressed almost all impulses that urged me to "quickly check out xyz". From tomorrow on, I will keep a checklist of all occasions where I suppressed these urges to keep me as accountable as possible.

Daily affirmation.
I am getting my mojo back!

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. I finished preformatting the draft of a booklet I wanted to tackle for a year. Tomorrow, I'll send it out to all contributors and get their comments.

2. I have suppressed the urge to get the bag of my favorite Christmas chocolates. I thought of buying it to kind of serve as a reward when thsi month is over, but honestly... if I have it at home, it's just going to drain me of energy to block the desire off. Can you have chocolate in front of you and be strong enough to suppress the desire to eat it? Absolutely. But why waste my energy on blocking off something when I could use it in a more positive way? I know my favorite chocolates. I will find a way to get it if I still want it in december.

3. Though I still don't know what my purpose really is, there is a fire in me that pushes me forward step by step. I think the more I work on steps towards small goals, for example in this challenge, the more I learn about myself.

How could I have made today better?
I have neglected my "10 idea practise" in the last three days. I will pick it back up tomorrow. Right now, my mind feels like a maelstrom of different ideas, I hope I can see the blue sky soon. This is what meditation has taught me so far: don't try to influence the thoughts you have, even if they seem to form a chaos. Somewhere there is a blue sky waiting. Just let the clouds pass.

7 minute workout
It was great and I will do it again tomorrow. After I did my 120 push-ups/squats/sit-ups - so I have energy to do them first. The 7 minute workout will get my pulse going as a good finish to my calisthenics. That workout also need some "practise"... I barely had enough time to switch positions between exercises. ;-)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 116
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Do you actually recommend taking some dedicated time each day to not work? Like 2 hours in the middle of the day where I completely switch off. I have the hardest times to keep on task when I am either unsure about how to move on or a lot of unfinished thoughts accumulating. 

Just two hours "off" could calm that down. Or would you work through those times and trust that the mind picks up the direction sooner or later? I certainly have no problem finding stuff to work on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I definitely think some downtime can be very good and a major boost to your productivity. It's all about experimenting and finding what works best for you. I'd describe myself as being rather terrible at taking time off, haha.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

What would make today great?

If I truly did not give in to distractions. Catching yourself in the impulse is still ok, if it lasts a few seconds.
Update: pretty much done. The only time I checked a news site for more than 5 minutes was during dinner, and even then I did not like it that much.
I have suppressed almost all impulses that urged me to "quickly check out xyz". From tomorrow on, I will keep a checklist of all occasions where I suppressed these urges to keep me as accountable as possible.

 I've found if I'm working on my computer it's hard to not "quickly" look at a site.  Most of the time I don't really need to be on the internet, so to combat this temptation I go downstairs and switch off my wireless modem.  So now if I want to get back on the internet I have to stop what I'm doing, walk downstairs and then turn the modem back on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ed!

Hadn't realized you were here. Great to see you.

That sounds like a very efficient way to get off the internet. Maybe I can find a way to do that too.

Day 13

What am I grateful for today?
1. Getting up early. Still the most important part of the day. I still look forward getting up at 5 am.
2. Living in the US. Whenever I see the many goals that I still have, it's nice to realize that I already got my Green Card and can work wherever I want in the US. One dream fulfilled.
3. Friends and family. I have called at least one family member every day over the last week, and it makes me indeed happy.
4. Christmas time soon. The best time of the year.
5. My computer. I would not be writing this without it.
6. Writing. And writing makes me happy.
7. My scanner. An efficient reduction in the numbers of documents flying around.
8. Protein shakes. The current one with chocolate flavor is pretty good. Yet almost no carbs!
9. Meditation. It has already shown its effect. Whenever there is a lot going on in my mind or around me, having learnt to trust that there is always calm underneath is making life a lot easier.
10. Working towards a goal. If you have a goal and a purpose, the action steps I need to take are almost self-explanatory.

What would make today great?
If I could minimize distractions - which I did. I actually counted the times when I could get distracted, and 70 - 80% of the time, I withstood. So I'm happy about that. Even though the number could still be higher.

Daily affirmation.
Even if I'm tired, I can still get as much done as possible.

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. I went through 1/3 of my notes from the last month. Two more days, and I have cleaned up my thoughts from this gigantic chaotic heap and put them into defined action steps.
2. I managed to do the 7-minute workout after my 120 squats, sit-ups and push-ups.
3. I feel at the end of the day I really was efficient today. A great feeling.

How could I have made today better?
I could have sent out the booklet as I wanted to.

Completion list
I spent a long time going through lists of notes I made during the last months, so the whole day I basically worked on my "completion lists". I still took 30 minutes to actually cross something off the list, and it was a good experience. I also dedicated from 6 - 8 pm each friday to complete my open projects. That will probably help me a lot. i take a lot of notes, but then never really review them. So they still get lost - not in my mind, but in a big, bottomless heap of endless data.

Another observation I made is that the earlier I get stuff done in the day, the less stressed I am towards the end of the day. Doing something for 10 minutes at 12 pm, when the other half of the day is still there vs. doing something when there are only two hours left is a completely different feeling. Even though it takes 10 minutes in both cases.

Edited by Florian
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ed!

Hadn't realized you were here. Great to see you.

That sounds like a very efficient way to get off the internet. Maybe I can find a way to do that too.

Good to see you here too.  I signed up towards the start, just haven't had the time to post much lately.

You could try disconnecting your modem and moving it to a different room.  I can't remember where I read it but the idea is to put physical barriers in your way so it's easier to do the work rather than procrastinate.

Of course if you want to procrastinate by reading about procrastination you could read this classic Wait But Why post

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 14

What am I grateful for today?
1. Getting up early. I feel like nothing can stop me when I am up at 5 am.
2. My space heater. Today, the cold did dampen my enthusiasm a bit. Then I thought: "Wait a second, I have this machine here..." And the problem was solved!
3. Game Quitters Challenge. I like these missions, and the community is great as well!
4. NoNothingNovember. This just adds another layer to working towards my goals.
5. Having written down all my ideas. Nothing feels lost.
6. Having decluttered my house. Almost a whole layer of fog removed after I got rid of 465 items from my household.
7. Writing. Clears my mind.
8. Morning workout. It's tough, but the "burn" in my muscles afterwards feels really good.
9. Podcasts. Always easy to listen to in between.
10. Great books. They are like mentors.

What would make today great?
If I really enjoy myself while singing Karaoke tonight!

Daily affirmation.
I can do it, even if I feel exhausted sometimes!

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. I finished going through half of my ideas and sort them into projects. That was a big chunk.
2. I sent out the booklet draft to the contributing authors and got some feedback already, largely positive.
3. I am going out of my house in a couple of minutes to the open mic night Karaoke!

How could I have made today better?
I could have been a little less nervous in the face of Karaoke tonight. I am sure afterwards I feel fine though!

Meditation
It was an interesting experience - I used the video from the Game Quitters Challenge pdf: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8ij3wG2slM
I did not expect that I could sit still for 45 minutes, but I did it. It helped that I completely let go and just followed the instructions.
Do you know these patterns where you fix your eyes and stare "through" the paper or screen, until a 3D image comes up? I try to do a similar procedure with my thoughts. I look at a certain item in my mind, think about it, try to visualize it and then just imagine I am staring through that item in my mind. That completely gets rid of any thought. That's how I free myself during meditation, and the more often I do that, the longer I can keep that.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Unfortunately, Karaoke has to wait until the weekend. I tried three different bars and none would host open mics tonight. At least I had some nice chats with several people in the bar and I stumbled into a friend on my way home. So it was a fun night out anyway.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 15

What am I grateful for today?
1. A warm apartment. It does become a bit cold outside, and warm rooms go well with my cold showers.
2. Fall season. Despite its cold, the fall season is quite beautiful. I actually took a photo - I like how the golden colors mix with the still green ones.
3. My white board. Everything looks great, having my goals listed on there.
4. Getting up early. Still the best part of the day, although I'll be in bed earlier today.
5. Meditation. Last 15-min interval, tomorrow I'll meditate 20 minutes. Headspace.
6. Science. My passion.
7. Writing. Another passion.
8. Books. They take you into a completely different world, if you let them. Read the "Neverending Story" by Michael Ende.
9. My kitchen. I always liked big kitchens...
10. ... steaks. Because you can nicely fry those in them.

 

What would make today great?
1. If I could look back at the day and say: "I enjoyed everything I did."

Daily affirmation.
I am moving on and nothing can stop me.

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. The package with Christmas sweets from my uncle in Germany has arrived. Funny that I chose to not eat any sweets during the month of november... well, now I have something to look forward to!
2. The weather was great outside so I could take good photos of the leaves in fall.
3. I called several old friends and had great conversations.

How could I have made today better?
Maybe if I had not watched a two hour movie for dinner - I would have had more time to work on my projects. On the other hand, I was a bit exhausted and felt I needed a bit of a break.

Meditation
My 10 biggest fears.
#1 - Fear of large insects.
#2 - Fear of losing control.
#3 - Approach Anxiety.
#4 - Fear of commitment.
#5 - Fear of dental treatments. I should have never asked the dentist to show me his instruments. Never do that!
#6 - Fear of needles. Not really a fear, but I really cringe every time I get a shot.
#7 - Fear of abandonement. Though I have mostly overcome that fear. I live in the US far away from home after all.
#8 - Fear of falling.
#9 - Fear of failure. That must be what underlies my desire to be perfect. It also makes it hard to write this list down.
#10 - Fear of success. There is still some residual fear there

While I googled common fears, I saw that fear of public speaking is the second most widespread fear, after fear of heights. I guess I can be thankful that I actually enjoy being a public speaker. Something else to be thankful for. I feel if you enjoy being with people and just imagine you are explaining something to a friend, you can survive the crowd pretty well. Playing in an orchestra also helped.

How will I tackle one of them?
Well, it's probably the easiest when I try to kill my approach anxiety, which has crept back up, by talking to 10+ girls the night I'll sing Karaoke the coming weekend.

Fall colors.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 16

What am I grateful for today?
1. Friends and family. Always having my back.
2. My imagination. Because nowadays, it's only a small step to turn your dreams into reality.
3. My camera. I like the possibility of just having one device to take photos.
4. Music. It's always on my mind.
5. Living in the US. It really is the land of opportunities.
6. Getting up at 5 am. Start into the day as early as possible.
7. That you can learn nearly everything online. Living in the era of opportunity.
8. My space heater. Makes my apartment warm.
9. Having a roof over my head. Shelter from the storm.
10. Books. Goes neatly with #7.

What would make today great?
1. If I finished sorting my notes online.

Daily affirmation.
Slowly and surely, I am moving towards my goals.

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. I finished the voice/tonality exercise for this day and learnt a whole lot about my voice.
2. I did my calisthenics even though I did not "feel like it".
3. The snacks I have at home have not challenged my willpower so far.

How could I have made today better?
I could have gotten a bit more sleep.

Voice and Tonality Exercises

I was surprised how many elements go into expressive speaking. I also realized once more that I am speaking much too fast. Is this because I have too many thoughts or am I just worried not getting to say in time what I want to say? Maybe practising the different types of rapport and recording my voice while reading some texts aloud will get me used to speaking more slowly.

I have attached the audio files of me reciting the first paragraph of my Letter To Myself from Day One.

Conventional: first version.
Seeking Rapport, Breaking Rapport, Neutral Rapport, Monotonous: different tonalities
Incorporating all elements: my first try to apply all the different tonalities.
Improvement 03: The best version so far

Observations

1. You can't always be seeking rapport. That reveals complete insecurity, although "speaking up" has become somewhat more widespread in the last years. I always felt that makes speech somewhat passive aggressive, because I always get the impression people have a hidden agenda with anything they talk about. However, sometimes inflecting your voice upwards makes sense. For example in the middle of a sentence, you can make the rapport break at the end of a sentence more impactful.

2. You can't always be breaking rapport. I find that becomes very unnatural, since you are essentially always make clear statement. And to make a statement, you need to have a hypothesis or question beforehand, so there needs to be seeking rapport in there somewhere. Maybe if you talk to people, you can let them seek rapport, and you make the statements via breaking rapport.

I think the right mix between seeking and breaking rapport can create tension that moves the story you are telling forward.

3. You can use neutral rapport to tie over long sentences between upwards or downwards inflections of your voice.

4. I rather not use monotonous rapport. It is rather boring, and you don't want to be like this guy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhiCFdWeQfA

Pauses. I realized that I am speaking too fast. Including pauses can make speech that much more interesting. I think in public speaking, you can even wait a long while far beyond the time the audience has settled and just stand on stage and maybe look at your audience before you start speaking. Not sure though whether that is a good tactic.

I called my mother and took care to apply a lot of breaking rapport.

The result: what would have been a 45 minute call ended after 15 minutes. Even though I put in a lot of pauses. Plus, I was personally exhausted from talking afterwards.

Breaking rapport is efficient in getting a message through relatively quickly with almost no resistance or feedback. The other person just agrees and the conversation moves on.

It is less well suited in creating a connection.

Breaking rapport then, probably, is good in making a connection, but if you do it too much, people will walk right over you. Interesting!

I think it's fascinating how much communication really happens non-verbally. Like here - through voice tone.

Conventional.mov

Seeking Rapport.mov

Breaking Rapport.mov

Neutral Rapport.mov

Monotonous.mov

Incorporating all elements.mov

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Think of Breaking Rapport more as a way to assert yourself and show confidence in what you're saying vs. Seeking Rapport which comes off as insecure. And all of this is interpreted subconsciously so it's very important stuff. If you listen to the end of Donald Trumps' new radio ad (Ad #2), you'll hear him say he approves this message but with Breaking Rapport. Very important here.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes, thanks for the ad. Maybe trying to assert myself all the time made me exhausted. My impression is actually that "seeking rapport" also creates insecurity in the whole conversation. Sometimes I don't want to appear too aggressive in conversation, but now that I think of it - breaking rapport can actually induce comfort in a conversation, especially with a girl. There needs to be one person who leads the conversation.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Day 17

What am I grateful for today?
1. A good night’s sleep. More sleep, more happiness.
2. Getting up early. I like when the sun comes up and I am already awake.
3. Writing. I have done it now daily for over a year and it really never gets old.
4. Morning workout. Gives me strength, and nothing's better than the burn you feel after you have exerted yourself.
5. Friends and Family. Always having my back.
6. Meditation. It puts a lot of your thoughts in perspective: how you think of yourself, how you effect the environment and vice versa and how present you are in your daily life. For example, I sometimes listen to podcasts while I am doing some busywork. Is that really advisable? Or should I be completely present when doing any work?
7. Kratom. A great supplement, it helps me to relax and increases my happiness. If that was even possible.
8. December soon. The magical month. I love fall and winter because of the power of that month.
9. That the days are long and the years are short. That means: if you can switch off your daily worries, you will realize that you get towards your goals in no time at all.
10. A warm apartment. Yeah, I think having the shower cold is enough "discipline" for the morning. ;-)

What would make today great?
If I finished going through all my notes that remain.

Daily affirmation.
I will indeed get it done.

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. I got through almost all of my notes.
2. Even though in the past, Saturdays were my "cheat days", I managed to go today without any snacks. Even though I had my Christmas cookies present!
3. I realized that sometimes the reason people are not talking much is that they are a bit shy. Be patient if they don't immediately respond to your "baiting statement". Try again before you walk away.

How could I have made today better?
I don't know how. It was a good day.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

So, finally getting an "update in" - I think I have skipped two days of the Game Quitters Challenge, I wrote 4 new blog posts over the weekend, including the corresponding Youtube videos, and that took almost all of my time. Can't believe it.

I actually started the 180 Day-10 ideas a day Challenge, based on "Become an Idea Machine" by Claudia and James Altucher. Over 6 months, you write down 10 ideas or more for a given topic. http://lifesciencementor.com/how-to-grow-as-a-person-idea-machine-edition/

Now I have a clear purpose for the next 6 months - I was at first skeptical and thought my enthusiasm got the most of me. One day afetr posting the first video I was actually scared about having publicly signed up to block a certain time every day. But after I did the second video, it became clear to me that this time is actually an investment. I already feel that I have much more energy and ideas. So yeah, maybe weekly videos would be easier, but I like the daily commitment. And who knows what happens within the next 6 months? I can also see much better where I want my blog to go towards, so that is a great side effect also.

And what compelled me to take such a challenge in the first place? Being on the Game Quitters forum, that's what.

Back to the audios of Day 17. 

Quick reminder: These conversations are about baiting the other person into saying extending the conversation. After you say "Hi" and "Thank you", for example, when you get a coffee, you say, for example: "Ya, I'm actually not from here." - so the other person says: "Where are you from?"

You basically give the other person a reason to do what they always want: talking to you. Maybe that sounds arrogant. And it's nothing like that. Assuming the other person wants to talk to me actually helps me not to take things too seriously: 

Some people do not want to talk to me. That puts them out of my reality, where people are friendly and indeed want to talk to me. If a person is out of my reality, that's cool. I simply smile and move on and don't try to convince the other person to like me.

It took me talking to approximately 1,000+ people (mostly girls ;-) over the last two years until this view on reality settled.

Back to the conversations I had. I thought about three different baiting statements: "I am actually not from here."; "I just finished playing my cello." and "I just sent in my manuscript." I used the "cello" and the "not from here" bit. I was not sure how easy people would relate to my "manuscript".

1.) Dunkin Donuts: maybe you don't hear the guy well, but he was as tall as me and despite that very shy. I first mentioned that I am not from here, no response. Then I dug a bit deeper and told him that the small coffee he gave me woud be considered large in Germany. And then he started to get a bit into the conversation. Sometimes people are very shy. You wouldn't believe it by looking at them. If you want to talk to someone and they don't immediately respond, they may just be shy. Sadly, you talking to them might be the first time somebody actually invited them into a conversation. Which is actually very sad, and I do think those are negative side effects of the abundance of Social Media. Which also means people crave real human contact.

2.) Post Office: I was the only customer there and the clerk took a good amount of time trying to fit my Christmas gifts into a package to Germany. I wanted to send ca. $50 worth of Simpsons paraphernalia and Christmas tree decoration to Germany, and it costs $50. I kid you not. For those prices of international shipping, I rather buy it online from the German Amazon account.

3.) Grocery Store: I really thought the cashier would not be interested in classical music, yet I mentioned my cello anyway, and he liked it! Surprise. See what happened there? I was insecure and thought people would not like what I had to contribute. 

This is interesting to me, because my assumption the others do not "like me enough" sometimes rears its ugly head and as a consequence, I think I need to be extra perfect before I can speak up. Reality shows that that apparently is not true.

So the moral of the story is that you have to go and talk to people and/or just dare to get rejected. It will happen less than you think.

I heard someone named "Cameron" or something like that even made a video about it ;-)

 

110715 Florian Dunkin Donuts.mov

110715 Florian Grocery Store.mov

110715 Florian Post Office.mov

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awesome to hear your update. The thing is, the reason most people don't have more interesting conversations is because someone in the conversation has to take the initiative, so unless that's you... the chance of you having a more interesting conversation is very low. Why hope someone else will take initiative instead of just taking it yourself? The next reason is because there is a lack of context for the conversation, so by using a "baiting statement" you give the conversation more context, and thus make it easier for the conversation to flow. That's all it's really about. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks, Cam! Conversation should be easy flowing, I think. It is actually natural for people to talk to each other. No idea why that becomes so difficult.

Day 18

What am I grateful for today?
1. Getting up early. Still the best.
2. My supplements. They get me started in a good way.
3. Mastermind Meetings. I am in a really helpful group for my blog- I guess that is already another group I belong to.
4. My space heater. I like it comfy.
5. Elvis Presley. For some odd reason, I have listened a lot to the King lately.

6. Fall in New England. It's just beautiful.
7. Cold showers. Yes, I still take them. I hesitate a little bit, but almost two years of cold showering will not be undone, even if I was in the arctic!
8. The 10 Idea Challenge. It's inspiring to come up with new ideas every day.
9. Coffee. The elixir of Gods. Maybe?

10. My cello. Listening to music is great, making it even better.

What would make today great?
If I finished the "longer conversation" routine for this day's challenge.

Daily affirmation.
Even if progress sometimes lags, I will get right back into it.

Three amazing things that happened today.
1. Just mentioning my name in a conversation triggered somebody else to approach me enthusiastically (more below).
2. I got good advice from the mastermind meeting.
3. I am getting more visitors on my blog! 307 within the last 7 days, and in the three weeks before only 65 per week. I am really curious to see how daily posting will affect my long-term gain of visitors. Will it flatten out or become exponentially more?
I committed to working on my blog one hour per day and to publish two articles per week - that made all the difference. 
4. On another note, I figured out how to (a) work iMovie and (b) how to fix a syncing issue between audio and video on some of my Youtube videos.

Once my daily posting becomes more regular, I will finish the NoNothingNovember booklet by the end of november, so I have an actual product that I can offer (free of charge, but still) once more people are visiting my site. It's a bit crazy, but I feel I have to prepare for the next stage in my blog (ultimately my business) while I just finished the stage before. But it's also exciting.

I think when we stop developing and lean back, that's precisely where the power of the "Slight Edge" will sink us. Still, I did not realize I got so many new visitors compared to before, and maybe it's not much in the long run - still, I am a bit exhausted ;-) No TV or stuff like that, one hour to bed and I am still typing here. I feel my work drags me along with it, in a good way.

How could I have made today better?

I am still feeling surprised that blog posting takes me so long - it's probably a matter of time to get the time down.

Longer conversations

This is basically a repeat of day 17, this time with me introducing myself and/or keeping the conversation for longer. I learned useful stuff about myself just from recording the conversations. I started the conversations mainly by asking for the time.

New Neighbor
Did not think this guy would talk to me, but he did. He stood 6 feet away during the conversation, and I did not want to intrude into his space, I guess I could have come closer. Taking the lead in moving people around is still something I am not doing well, if I don't even dare coming closer, it won't change. I probably just have to people more often and just position myself so they are not miles apart when I talk to them.

Most importantly though, I do not see myself as a leader. Why not? Well, first I thought: "Because my Mom..." and then I stopped. Reasons for failure are just excuses, I think - they don't help me. So why do I now not see myself as a leader? Because I see myself as a slightly ridiculous goof. A lovable loser. Not good, I thought I was over that.

As is evident in the following conversations: I am talking too fast and I am seeking rapport far too often. Even asking for time I can do with downward inflection in my voice. The uptalk is killing me here! That's technique. 

Then comes mindset. I have to see myself more as a professional. For example, today, after I listened back to the audios and I was having some technical issues with Youtube, I did not sit in front of my computer and swore, but I thought of ways to fix the problem. Any step I am doing is a step towards working on my professional future. That's the mindset I need to have. The mindset of not taking myself too serious serves me well with others and in life, but I can also see the more negative flipside: It's good to not take life too serious, but I have to take my own dreams serious indeed.

Jenny
This was a mother waiting for her kids.

Sri Lanka
An Indian (?) woman in the grocery store behind the cash register who refused to shake my hand out of religious/societal reasons. In these moments I am grateful having grown up in a society that encourages personal freedom and has done away with restrictive interpersonal barriers.

Joanne
One of the supermarket cashiers waiting outside - I teased her about her hair and she played along. I introduced myself and then...

Florio
... another guy working there overheard our conversation and was completely excited to meet the second "Florian" in his life. He had apparently grown up without knowing anyone with the same name. The moral from the story: just start your conversations with ANYTHING. Even your name can seed a second conversation.

Sorry
You know when you move your food cart through the isle and then someone else moves his or her cart out of the way and apologizes before you said anything? That happened here. So I struck up a conversation after telling her she does not need to be sorry.

Pinky
The cashier had a broken finger. And guess why? A guy disrespected her and she punched him. O... kay. I guess. Maybe this area of town is not an area I want to retire in. ;-)

 

 

 

01 - New Neighbor.mov

02 - Jenny.mov

03 - Sri Lanka.mov

04 - Joanne.mov

05 - Florio.mov

06 - Sorry.mov

07 - Pinky.mov

Link to comment
Share on other sites

New Neighbor - Convo with the was good. Now the next time you see him you have more rapport established and you can continue building a relationship.

Jenny - You did a good job on your pacing when you introduced yourself, very smooth, good timing. You got a bit uncomfortable with your "eject" and overcompensated a bit "don't wait too long, don't get too cold", but that's ok. When you're ready to eject in the future, just, "anyways, Thanks... hope you have a great day!"that sort of thing is fine.

Sri Lanka - Your opening was good. Contextual. Got the conversation going, transition to Germany was good. Your introduction was rushed (you were almost done with the groceries), so that's alright.

Joanne - Great opening. You can tell you were inspired and spontaneous (listen to the energy in your voice, it's a lot more natural during the opening). After the initial open you probably stayed on the hair topic too long which killed some of the momentum of the conversation, but your introduction was solid. Now next time you see her you have more rapport.

Florio - Haha this is awesome. A good example of how when you're a bit more social you create more social opportunities.

Sorry - Good job :)

Pinky - Haha yikes. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share