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Theresa

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Everything posted by Theresa

  1. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 14 I was so close to relapsing. If the game didn’t take so damn long to download I would have. I think I get periods of depression and that may have caused an altercation at work with a coworker who is also a friend. it’s a relationship that has been aggravating me for months. All the angry exchanges trigger the violence and upheavals in my past family life. Back the then I ’d turn to my Nintendo to escape. I want to turn to my mobile game to ease up a bit. I recognize the pattern, and even though I don’t feel ok I know this is just a bump in the road and I gotta get over it and that
  2. Theresa

    Journal

    Ooh, I’ll have to work up to 12 minutes, 7 minutes feels long sometimes . Yah I think being on the lookout for triggers especially in the gray zones is really crucial. I don’t know how you can watch your clients play. That’s pretty messed up, in the sense that you have to deal with that. They play games in therapy?
  3. That’s awesome you can meditate that long. I know 7 minutes helps me. 55 minutes must do wonders for you. Hang tight with your job. I’m sure it is so life changing for your clients.
  4. All the best with your physical recovery. That must be so difficult. I’m glad you are able to do some yoga though.
  5. I understand. Reading your journal, it sounds as if you are an intelligent, talented, and successful person. There must be something relating to one of these traits or another that Overwatch satisfies? What are these needs?
  6. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 13 I don’t count this as a relapse because my motives were for socialization rather than to escape or checkout, and I did not feel as if I was giving into a craving. One of my friends wanted to hangout to show his new flight simulator and laptop he had just purchased. We played for like 1 1/2 hours and it was easy to walk away from it. I thought it was actually a pretty convivial experience. I wonder where to draw the line. Give up all gaming or only the ones that are personally addictive? I’ve been meditating for 7 minutes in the morning and it has been really calming. I will star
  7. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 13 I realize that after a stressful workday I would game for hours to checkout of reality. I’ve found running and going outside to be tremendously helpful after these types of days. I keep regretting all the time and money I spent this past year on gaming and I’m disappointed that I couldn’t control my gaming habits and perhaps never will. It feels so slavish that something so synthetic and constructed as gaming was so influential and that I couldn’t find moderation, but I don’t think it would be unhealthy or unnatural to cut out gaming entirely. If that’s the solution I am okay w
  8. That is such a cool point about “boundary objects” and gaming. Literally when you participate in a certain fictional realm you are so restricted because you have to play by those linear rules determined by that artifact; while engaging with real people and living in and sensing the actual world you have the freedom to make your own choices in reality. And yes that we ALWAYS can make a choice! Thank you for sharing and all the best with everything.
  9. Hey, stay strong! It’s never too late to recover. All the best with your upcoming school year!
  10. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 12 I drove 4 hours and afterwards I really craved gaming. I’m not sure why. I was kinda tired but not stressed... I went walking for a while instead. I haven’t stuck to my morning routine but hope to pick it up again tomorrow. I’m really grateful places are opening up here. 8 of my coworkers and I went and got burgers and drinks today. That real social interaction definitely filled the need for socialization that I turned to in gaming. Hope you’re well. Rooting for you!
  11. Theresa

    Journal

    25 clients. That’s awesome. Congratulations and all the best with that and your exam!
  12. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 11 low cravings, no gaming
  13. Nice job on following through with your intentions. Peer pressure from gamer friends can be so challenging, so way to go on handling that!
  14. Hey, way to go day 47! Don’t overlook having accomplished reading and working out. In themselves they are good and healthy activities. Keep it up!
  15. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 10 Today was great! I got up to an alarm, did 10 min of meditation, and read for 30 min. I hope to make this a daily morning routine. It definitely helps with the morning cravings. I was driving for about 4 hours and listened to podcasts recommended on this forum. The one with James about turning gaming into superpower was awesome and really inspirational. I got rejected today lol!! For a mission I had to ask the clerk for 10% off my coffee. So I plopped some car oil, popcorn, and my $2 coffee on the counter and asked for the discount on the drink and she was like, “why?” And I s
  16. Theresa

    Journal

    @TheNewMe2.0yes! I would like to apply for a psyD program in Virginia. I haven’t started yet and need to take the GRE....hey good luck with your getting your LPC! Are you taking clients currently?
  17. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 9 Unfortunately did not follow my usual routine today, feel sorta down. Last year I know I was hella gaming on this date because of lockdown but I’m grateful this year to be able to go to prayer services. I’m not going to use discord for the duration of these 90 days and I think that’ll help with cravings. For the Challenge I need to post my vision board- visual representation of what one wants to create for his/her life. I have no photo editing skills but here’s the gist. Hope you’re all well and I’m rooting for you.
  18. Theresa

    Journal

    Thank you so much for the encouragement and advice, James. This post has hit home in many ways.
  19. Theresa

    Journal

    Thank you all for the great advice and support @[email protected]@Zeno of Elea @Octsober I’ve tried apps like headspace but I always cut out because I get impatient and annoyed lol. I’ll give it another go; and I’ll be tracking screen time and limiting it... going to go on a retreat this weekend and learn to use excel to keep busy. Day 8 I’m pretty grateful to have a break from work and not be cooped up inside. It was fun to get dressed up and go out with my housemate for her wedding planning. The world seems to be opening up a bit which is heartening. I’m really afraid of l
  20. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 7 I did a mini running and swimming biathalon before work. Exercising has really helped my energy. I was feeling so tired and down after quitting. I’ve been spending way too much time on Facebook and Discord because I feel the urge to be on my phone. I can’t get myself to delete Discord, I keep uninstalling but feel so much anxiety when it’s gone. It’s also frustrating because on discord they keep asking me to play. I know the answer is simple. I’m nervous about this weekend which I have off work because I don’t want to relapse as there will be extra time. Hope you’re all well. Rootin
  21. Totally understand you...The times that I didn’t relapse when that nostalgia came, I found it really helpful to journal what you’re feeling and then why you might be feeling that way. Besides VR being visually appealing, there may be another reason for wanting to delve into the world, and by recognizing one’s motivations it helps make the process more of a rational one rather than emotional. I also find setting a schedule especially during those times that I used to play (like after work or in the morning) really helpful. It both breaks the habit and fills the void.
  22. Theresa

    Journal

    @WorkInProgressHey, thanks for the link and advice. I’m going to check out the site once I make a Reddit account. I really like your distinction between fitness and weight loss and I’ll definitely reconsider my goals.
  23. @Zeno of Eleathanks for the advice. Sleeping regularly is life-changing. I used to only get a couple of hours when gaming and that was pretty bad....I’m picking up exercising and reading. The former helps with fatigue a lot.
  24. Congratulations on the job hire and even more on pursuing something you love and enjoy not just some random bill-paying hustle! That inspires me.
  25. Theresa

    Journal

    Day 6 At work I kept thinking and imagining playing Lifeafter. It was definitely something I looked forward to doing after work. It was what I worked for. I have so many regrets of the time and money I wasted on that game. I don’t know whether to delete discord but not to be stereotypical, FOMO is hella real. I got up to run before work which was so refreshing. I’m setting a new goal to lose 10 lbs not because I’m overweight but for process of doing so. It will build self-discipline, better eating habits, and be something tangible to achieve. My college decided to have graduation this May