Ikar

4th Apr - 7th Apr: I'm gonna go to bed early today, as I have been feeling tired all day today. I can't afford to go to bed at midnight and get up at 7. I just have zero energy and the sun wakes me up early. I met a friend I didn't see for 2-3 months, spent time with the Georgian girl and worked on a presentation for the university today. I also had some communication with the language companies regarding my employment and other options of cooperation.

I'm using the template I used the last time. 05/02/21 - 05/04/21 "L" will stand for the (last) plan/notes for this term. "T" will stand for done this term. I added "Future goals/direction" to better reflect on the things I am trying to do and to add specificity. I will copy it and stick it somewhere where I can see it to remind myself whenever I feel aimless. I will also use different colors: blue for newly added goals/habits, green for completed/successful, orange for ongoing/some progress and red for ones I haven't worked on in that period. --- Books/Reading articles: L: I realized I actually do read quite a bit, it's mostly just not books. I'm currently reading one book on sex, but overall during the month I've gone through many articles on history, finance and current events, as well as my newsletters. I've actually decided to block one news outlet that I think I was reading too much for no real gain. Now I follow "Portal:Current events" on Wiki, where I can easily see world-wide news and access information without much bias. T: The situation is fairly similar, except that I cut down on news. I think I much rather watch videos where people are having a conversation or explaining something rather than reading or just simply listening without video. I've barely touched the newsletters. Possible direction/goals: Continue getting through the newsletters. Family: L: I got us a board-game on Christmas that we sometimes play together during the weekends. I'm also helping my grandma to transition to a new phone operator and my brother helped me regarding some settings of my bike. It's a bit of a rare occasion, but I am not visiting my parents this weekend, because my father contracted CV a few days ago. My brother had an inconclusive test, but I am negative, so I'm visiting my grandma tomorrow. T: A few weeks ago, I decided to visit my family every other weekend for the afternoon to prioritize my own issues, needs and wants. I think it's also better to meet the members separately - i.e. meeting my family twice as a whole, plus meeting my father and my brother once for a month for lunch - somewhat seems as more valuable than meeting my family four times as a whole. I also helped my grandma with getting a new phone and transitioning to a new operator! Possible direction/goals: Continue working on bettering the relationships with my family. University: L: I wouldn't have thought so at first, but working on the collaborative assignments has been a crap-shoot. I'm not particularly happy with their outcomes, although they are/were done sufficiently enough to get by. I'm happier with my own work and assignments and it seems I might not even have an exam this semester in the classical sense. As I had guessed, the exam term ended for me by handing in some writing at the beginning of January, yet for most people it ends today, so I haven't really done much in the last month. I contacted one of the profs to be my tutor for my project/thesis. I also take part in our geography student's group, though we're not too active at the moment. T: University's been normal and the classes I attend are mostly interesting. I haven't gone to Germany, but I am planning to go to Bulgaria for Erasmus after summer. It's amazing how the perception of education shifts once one has a real job and isn't fed by parents, for example by learning to value one's time. Possible direction/goals: Find more sources for my upcoming masters' thesis. Work on the assignments in a timely manner. Exercise/movement: L: This month has been slower, yet every week I went at least once for a walk and at least once to the gym. T: I feel that my "free-time" movement habits are sliding, however I somewhat counteracted that by creating incentives to push me into movement, such as having to visit students within walking/biking distance. I'm really not a fan of going to the gym lately, however I've already been outside with people playing football or basketball, as the weather got better. Possible direction/goals: Keep in shape. English: L: I worked around 110 hours this month; 65 and 30 for language schools and 15 for my private students. I also visited my English teacher-friend and asked him about his history when it came to teaching English. He said that he started teaching when he was 26, started his own courses when he was around 35 thanks to recommendations and had these ever since. He is now around 50 and he started teaching at high school a few months ago for a change of pace. The meeting helped me soothe some anxiety over the fact I am not advancing as fast as I'd like to when it comes to teaching. Regardless, I've recently made the effort to ask my students for recommendations to a) the respective language schools, b) on my website and c) on Google Maps. It can help me leverage my position regarding the language schools as well as to attract more private students. I'm also gonna attend an interview and another to re-negotiate my salary, once all the reviews from my students are in. I received some information that I could use to my advantage, so I'm gonna work on that in the next few weeks. T: The salary negotiations have turned out to be quite a drawn out process. I'm trying to position myself as best as I can in regards to several companies and to present my case as best as I can as well. I hope the interview I'm having tomorrow will be constructive, as I am also effectively asking for my competences and responsibilities to be expanded. Possible direction/goals: I'm also gonna attend an interview and another to re-negotiate my salary, once all the reviews I from my students are in. I received some information that I could use to my advantage, so I'm gonna work on that in the next few weeks. Look into strategies in becoming truly self-employed by skipping the agencies in between. I am going to pursue closer co-operation with my English mentor. I am going to check out a few more seminars on how to run online courses. / English research Women/dating: L: T: February and March have been pretty good with the Georgian girl and I believe we both enjoyed it. I'm happy that we managed to get the things we wanted to get done together. We will continue to date, until the distance is just too much to bear. She's going to have a more complicated schedule in April with a lot of traveling and in mid-May she's going to move to another city, which is however reachable on a weekly or bi-weekly basis. I hope to post an update on this when the time comes. Possible direction/goals: Set up at least two dates a month. ----- Additional thoughts/activities: My personal finance hobby has resurfaced once again. I made a new brokerage account, did a lot of reading and made a few calculations in one software. I calculated that my savings rate for 2021 averaged around 50% and that I doubled my net worth over the course of 2021 compared to 2020. My saving and investing is proceeding as planned. I'm also happy that during these two months, I tried out these activities: ice-skating, going to the theater and going to the shooting range. I think there is some merit to sharing joyful activities together with friends. My hobbies are: personal finance, gunnery, GIS, reading about history, English and geography. ----- Thanks for the support this year to the people below: @Max @BooksandTrees @Icandothis @Amphibian220 @The_Creative_Quitter @NesteaDrinker @Marius @alle @NannerZ @awcy_h @goodvibes I am happy that there is some "new blood" on the forums again besides the old guard. New or old, we can always make our lives a bit better. I don't have time to read and post in all your topics, but in case you want to ask me anything, feel free to message me.

31st Mar - 3rd Mar: I watched/read a bit of "news" on Friday and today, but both times only for a few minutes. I think it actually wasn't difficult for me to break the habit of checking it every few hours, as I had in mind the fact that it's just not useful for me. - In other news, I should devise some 30-90 minute activities I can do whenever I am on an unexpected break (e.g. a lesson gets cancelled). This Friday it was very apparent - I got 3 hours of unexpected free time and I didn't do anything in particular with it. It's just about realizing the moment that I have free time unexpectedly, at which I might not be good at yet. Now, I am a person who likes to take his time doing things and I don't like the feeling of being rushed, especially if there's something new I don't know how much time it takes or that takes a long time to do (e.g. writing). But even washing five plates and a pan in 30 minutes is on 95% better than to randomly do everything and nothing at the same time and hoping that I will do something useful. Some random activities I can do in a few dozen minutes to make use of small chunks of time: reading a book, stretching, washing the dishes, showering, cleaning the room/making the bed - I spent time with the Georgian girl and yesterday we went to the shooting range and did a bit of practice driving. I was instructing her in both cases, so it was somewhat stressful, but she's bright, fairly quick to learn and she enjoyed both activities. I also have an interesting business proposal for the language school I work for, kind of becoming a semi-professional recruiter for them. I'm meeting them on Wednesday 6th, so I hope something meaningful comes out of it, so we all benefit. I found out the last time I wrote the monthly report was two months ago, so I'm gonna put it to my calendar to do it the next week and set a monthly reminder too.

Reading (here) and hearing (one acquaintance) fasting this week, I decided to skip breakfast today. I had a few English classes and I could feel my brain progressively lag more and more as I was talking to my students and I also got a headache, so I decided to eat some food after and take a nap. Though I think it makes more sense to relate my troubles to the fact that in four days, the temperature dropped from 20 C (nearly reasonable T-shirt weather) to 0 C and snowing today 😄 Good luck!

28th Mar - 30th Mar: So I have not watched any news for the last three days and spent the time on other things. I have to say it's tempting to "get informed", but the attention is simply best used elsewhere. If there is something really big that happens, other people will tell me about it anyway. Nothing special otherwise - university, English classes, time with the Georgian girl, socializing... I wrote two emails regarding the pay rise today too, so I hope it will bear some fruit. If not, it's a good sign I should start working on my own marketing and seek advice.

I think it depends on the company you're with. Game reviews are going by done by people to people who are excited about the topic. It's as if you went to a bar and asked the regulars about alcohol - it's not exactly a mirror of the society as a whole, just a few guys who enjoy drinking more than the average person and that's why they are together. The bigger issue is that I overall feel like the West has somewhat degenerated to solve non-issues (while I still think it's currently the best place to live in - I live in Czechia) and that many people have lost track of what's meaningful, because we have such abundance. I think that's why the nationality structure of GQ is what it is - mostly North America, Europe and then the occasional outlier. Many people in poorer countries just don't have the luxury of time or money to get addicted to games. One guy whom I listen to stated that the war in Ukraine might rudely awaken people in Europe/North America to solve relevant issues again, instead of microaggressions, genderism or climate change. I hope that will be the case. As for encouraging addictive behavior, the solution is to say "no" or to change the environment and to be cool with the change even if nobody from the original environment joins you. Smokers and smokers-quitters can still get along quite well, as I've never seen anyone go together for a "smoking evening". Bar drinkers might meet again in some neutral venue without drinking, but it's far less likely that it'll work, as that's a big change. Online gamers have even less options - you just turn off the Internet and I stop existing in your world. Environment and "quit drinking and someone will buy you a shot" reminded me of this article: https://www.raptitude.com/2017/07/wise-people-have-rules-for-themselves/

21st Mar - 27th Mar: I decided I would visit my family only every second week, as spending 6-8 hours every week in one chunk is a lot of time. I want to have more time for myself and my own free-time projects. I did more exercise/walking this week than usual, I also worked on some uni projects that were due. I also watched some videos about finance and investing with Warren Buffett. I also decided to stop reading or watching the news. I know I had the idea before, that I blocked a few websites already and that I also read a few articles on the topic... the reason is that modern news is just entertainment with very little relevant informational value. I have several dozen e-mail newsletters that accumulated in my inbox over the last few months that I'd rather go through than randomly spending an hour on whatever news I come across. Or YT videos that can help me educate in the fields I want to be better at, such as finance, history or geography. It's pointless to consume news that do not benefit me in any way.

13th Mar - 20th Mar: I went to see the new Batman film, wrote an email asking for the pay raise, played in a table football tournament, was fairly physically active and spent time with the Georgian girl. I'm going to visit my family today and do some minor errands.

I mean, I have almost forgotten how does it feel to have a job I dislike. What do you have in mind to try out after you quit this job?

2nd Mar - 12th Mar: I went with my brother for sushi to a new place, which promptly gave me diarrhea. Anyhow, I went to the opera with the Georgian girl and went ice-skating the last weekend. This weekend I've been working on school errands, preparing for my asks for pay rise and overall just relaxing and lounging around. I again feel as if the time is just flying by very fast.

Seconding what @Pochatok wrote. I hope you are enjoying the time on your own and with your girl and other friends, as am I.

20th Feb - 1st Mar: I feel like the days are just flying by. I got myself a new dentist, because my old one retired. Everything seems to be going just fine, thankfully. I feel I have everything I need. Gratitude.

I believe she is the best match I've ever had. We don't call ourselves boyfriend and girlfriend, but we are exclusive. I think our relationship is getting into deeper layers too thanks to that.

6th Feb - 19th Feb: I can't exactly say that anything important happened these past two weeks. I spend time with the Georgian girl basically daily, although I sometimes meet other friends as well. The university started again and the responsibilities have been quite busy - next week I have 27 hours of English teaching planned and 8 hours of university classes. I managed to go for a walk or to the gym a few times. I'm also helping grandma with a new phone and I got my tax papers done.

6th Feb - 13th Feb: I don't think there's been anything noteworthy happening this week. In fact, I rather feel that I should start filing my tax report instead of thinking what to write here.

I'm aware I haven't been around writing much in the last few months. For comparison, my diary has pages 1-17 for 2019. 2020 has pages 18-36. 2021 has pages 37-42. I'll use this post as a repository for all the bigger summaries I've done. I actually haven't done one in 18 about months, though for those 18 months I did monthly reports. I'm gonna think of one now in a post below.

It's actually interesting that both of you old-timers have found out that it was not only gaming addiction that hampered your life, but that I'd say parallel to it, was a disease causing symptoms of its own. I think there's some merit to the rhetoric that @Amphibian220 is using and that it can work well, primarily on some singular issues or challenges, but if that approach fails a few times, it's worth thinking whether the issue is not somewhere else. Plus try-hard perseverance can be detrimental, especially while focusing on the wrong thing and while others are pushing you to do it. Right things have to be done for the right reasons, otherwise the things that are done don't matter.

I'm using the template I used the last time. 22/12/21 - 05/02/21 "L" will stand for the (last) plan/notes for this term. "T" will stand for done this term. I added "Future goals/direction" to better reflect on the things I am trying to do and to add specificity. I will copy it and stick it somewhere where I can see it to remind myself whenever I feel aimless. I will also use different colors: blue for newly added goals/habits, green for completed/successful, orange for ongoing/some progress and red for ones I haven't worked on in that period. --- Active writing (blog/writings/journal): L: I wrote a draft of an article the last week, though so far it's very disorganized. I started writing here in a new format, so I focus only on the most important events of the week. T: I can't say I've written anything in the last months. All I've done was to work on a few uni projects that required us to write something, however I haven't actually written anything on my blog or in my uni paper. That's not necessarily bad; I'm just stating how things are. Possible direction/goals: Write on my blog. Keep writing in my diary here twice/once a week. Books/Reading articles: L: I've not been reading anything much, only the occasional newsletter. I only watched a few lectures with Thomas Sowell. T: I realized I actually do read quite a bit, it's mostly just not books. I'm currently reading one book on sex, but overall during the month I've gone through many articles on history, finance and current events, as well as my newsletters. I've actually decided to block one news outlet that I think I was reading too much for no real gain. Now I follow "Portal:Current events" on Wiki, where I can easily see world-wide news and access information without much bias. Possible direction/goals: Continue getting through the newsletters. Family: L: Outside of the situation where I visited my grandma to get my composure back at the beginning of the month, I don't think there have been any special occasions in or around my family. T: I got us a board-game on Christmas that we sometimes play together during the weekends. I'm also helping my grandma to transition to a new phone operator and my brother helped me regarding some settings of my bike. It's a bit of a rare occasion, but I am not visiting my parents this weekend, because my father contracted CV a few days ago. My brother had an inconclusive test, but I am negative, so I'm visiting my grandma tomorrow. Possible direction/goals: Continue working on bettering the relationships with my family. University: L: I wouldn't have thought so at first, but working on the collaborative assignments has been a crap-shoot. I'm not particularly happy with their outcomes, although they are/were done sufficiently enough to get by. I'm happier with my own work and assignments and it seems I might not even have an exam this semester in the classical sense. T: As I had guessed, the exam term ended for me by handing in some writing at the beginning of January, yet for most people it ends today, so I haven't really done much in the last month. I contacted one of the profs to be my tutor for my project/thesis. I also take part in our geography student's group, though we're not too active at the moment. Possible direction/goals: Find more sources for my upcoming masters' thesis. Work on the assignments in a timely manner. Exercise/movement: L: This month has been slower, yet every week I went at least once for a walk and at least once to the gym. T: It's been about the same this month. Possible direction/goals: Keep in shape. English: L: The number of classes has been around the same. In case I lose some courses, I won't replace them, as I think it might be more useful to learn to use my free time better than I do now and I can't just work to pass most of my time. T: I worked around 110 hours this month; 65 and 30 for language schools and 15 for my private students. I also visited my English teacher-friend and asked him about his history when it came to teaching English. He said that he started teaching when he was 26, started his own courses when he was around 35 thanks to recommendations and had these ever since. He is now around 50 and he started teaching at high school a few months ago for a change of pace. The meeting helped me soothe some anxiety over the fact I am not advancing as fast as I'd like to when it comes to teaching. Regardless, I've recently made the effort to ask my students for recommendations to a) the respective language schools, b) on my website and c) on Google Maps. It can help me leverage my position regarding the language schools as well as to attract more private students. I'm also gonna attend an interview and another to re-negotiate my salary, once all the reviews I from my students are in. I received some information that I could use to my advantage, so I'm gonna work on that in the next few weeks. Possible direction/goals: I'm also gonna attend an interview and another to re-negotiate my salary, once all the reviews I from my students are in. I received some information that I could use to my advantage, so I'm gonna work on that in the next few weeks. Look into strategies in becoming truly self-employed by skipping the agencies in between. I am going to pursue closer co-operation with my English mentor. I am going to check out a few more seminars on how to run online courses. / English research Women/dating: L: T: Things have been going pretty well with the Georgian girl. She's gonna stay here until June and I myself might go to Germany for Erasmus in April, if the situation permits. It's nice to have somebody close to me to share things and try new things with every now and then. She's intellectually bright and can challenge me on a few things, so she also gives me the mirror sometimes. She's also good at English and had some interviews already. She negotiated even a bit higher rate than I did. She actually gave me the impulse to revisit the payment I get from language schools this early. Possible direction/goals: Set up at least two dates a month. ----- Additional thoughts/activities: This proved to be true and I welcomed this - I will factually have more time next month for other activities, as there are likely no exams for me during the exam term and I do not have to attend any classes. My personal finance hobby has resurfaced once again. I made a new brokerage account, did a lot of reading and made a few calculations in one software. I calculated that my savings rate for 2021 averaged around 50% and that I doubled my net worth over the course of 2021 compared to 2020.

20th Jan - 31st Jan: gym/exercise number: 1 I went for a trip to another city with the Georgian girl to see some sights the last weekend. I also pondered how to best invest my money, using a new broker Interactive Brokers alongside Degiro. My Erasmus application is also still in the works. My brother and I have also worked to put my bike into condition again, now that the weather might permit cycling without snow/ice. And as usual, I've been working and sometimes spending evenings with friends.

It reminds me of this timeless classic: Anyhow, the point is, with the current democracies as they are, having 4-6 years to rule before the opposition is likely to take over the country, that there is no political benefit to making the population healthier. As in the video above, it's basically reduced to the argument of either having 4 billion £ a year or not. Remember all those 80s Belmondo movies, where there are 4 guys sitting in a car and they are all smoking? Nobody cares about the long-lasting benefits of longer lifespan (and possibly longer productive age/work life), if you can cash out now and do something with the government money now.

13th Jan - 19th Jan: gym/walk number: 1 (2 - gym today evening) I feel again that there isn't much to write about, but I'll report anyhow. I'm spending time with the Georgian girl, teaching English (got a few more private students which is great) and doing some work on the uni project of mine. Some YT video or films about the topics I like here and there too.

Welcome back.

5th Jan - 12th Jan: gym/walk number: 3 So I'm back to teaching English after the Christmas holiday. This might be one of the first holidays when I wasn't bored at all in its duration. I think I'm overall trending towards pursuing my hobbies and passion interests more. I seem to value my free time more than my work time at the moment. That written, I haven't worked on the thesis for about a week now, even though I enjoy working on it. I find it difficult to sit down to it in the afternoons/evenings after my English classes, as I am most productive right in the morning when I have most of the English courses. Some of my English courses that I do for the language schools are actually ending soon, however I do have some influx of private students, so in the final analysis the amount of classes I have is about the same. I don't have any exams at the university, because I managed to pick only the subjects that are without it. It's somewhat frightening, as that means I will have these exams in later semesters, but I didn't know about this prior. I just chose my subjects the last semester based on how well it will work with my English teaching schedule. I did have to finish two projects in the last two days, though both of them were just a few hours' work. A few other bits for future reference: social meeting - MK, Georgian - gallery + films, internet mail solved, package sent, mails - newsletters, passport,0 Erasmus?

@Nico IndigoI second everything @BooksandTreeswrote above. I also stopped counting, quite recently actually, but I can't even begin to fathom all the things that would have to happen for me to end up gaming pathologically like I used to. I built up such a network of friends and acquaintances that I hardly ever need to use my journal as my "retreat" anymore when something in my life is not going too well. Usually I just talk it over with a friend and that's that. The part about acceptance of self is vital. Don't kid yourself that everything will be easy after quitting gaming, but also recognize what was going well for you even while you were gaming. My English would be nowhere near my current level if I didn't have the passion for gaming at some point in the past. I became an English lecturer after I quit games. Games will be forever a part of the path I took.

It's been like this for as long as I can remember, but it's normal. Quitting excessive gaming doesn't imply using GQ forums or even staying on them forever. Cam did reference there are 2.7 billion gamers in the world and if only 1% get addicted, it's 27 million people. Anyhow, you do raise valid a point of being vigilant. I think there are lots of (under)currents such as excessive gaming, substance (alcohol, tobacco etc.) abuse or irrational fear of nuclear energy. These are the things whose value is hardly calculable (especially monetarily), but I'd argue these ills are much more harmful to the mankind than the exalted CV pandemic, which however does seem to get the spotlight for the last two years.