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FedererMagic

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Everything posted by FedererMagic

  1. Congrats on making 100 days, I'm impressed by your self-awareness and insight at the age of 15 . Keep up the good work!!
  2. Hi Anxiety can be indeed a big motivation to stay at home and just play video games. But the problem with giving in to this, means that you're making it more diffcult for yourself to get out a next time. The anxiety will start building up and you can even feel it when you're just at home. I'm not saying all of this to scare you, but I had problems with this myself years ago and I hope my tips and insight can help you. An important thing is to try to get out of the house as much as possible. I know that it sucks at the moment and that sometimes it's the last thing you want to do, but there is no other option to get rid of it. Things that also helped for me were exercising as much as possible (gives you a calmer feeling), eating and drinking healthy (stopping with caffeine, sugar and stimulating products) and positive thinking. You have to find out for yourself what works and what you want to do, but I would recommend giving it a try . Anxiety can be tricky and challenging to overcome, but it's very much possible to do so. The best of luck!!
  3. Hi Nightfall, first of all I was drawn to this topic by your title 'second and last attempt'. It's great that you're trying to quit games now and I hope this attempt can make you quit it forever . But if there might be a relapse or you decide to start gaming again, I would think about the words 'last attempt'. One of my favorite quotes in life is "There is no possibility of failure, when you keep trying over and over". Offcourse I'm not the one to judge about which decisions you should make, but you need to give yourself some failures and more chances in life. But it's good that you made the decision that you don't want this with your life anymore and that you did some reflections. I'm sure this community will be able to help you and if you have any questions, I will gladly help you ! Best of luck!!
  4. Hi, there were some recognisable lines in the story, especially about saying to yourself that the lifestyle isn't so bad after all. True that you might find it not that bad, but why settle for this when great is possible? It's also something I struggled with, but it's great that you already realized it . Good luck on your journey!
  5. Hello, being a 24 year old myself, I don't consider it old . Good luck with quitting games and indeed good that you put some goals for yourself.
  6. Hi Nic, congrats for reaching 2 weeks! Good luck with your goals
  7. What might help is starting questions to yourself. Does leveling up make you really happy? Does it bring you towards the things you want in life? What will your life look like when you're still doing this in a couple of years time? There are some more beneficial ways to level up in life (competition, gym, a skill, volunteering, anything you want, ...). Those skill are far more difficult than the game you're playing, but the results and satisfaction will also be far more pleasant and happy for you. You're right that it doesn't bring the same satisfaction, it brings the satisfaction a 100 times more in real life .
  8. Hi addict10n Thanks for your input, I'm sure it will help me learn quicker and get towards my goals . It's good that you put this goal for you and even though it had crappy results, you took some action and that's the most important thing. Defenitely agree that those "techniques" will only give you short-term results, it doesn't magically change you as a person. Right now I'm working my way through the book Models (that Cam suggested) and it's great, it feels often like this guy is spot-on. I just read the abstract of your book, and it has a lot of similarities with the book Models. After I finish that, I will defenitely start your book! It's actually funny that you mention No More Mr. Nice Guy, I read this book a couple of years ago when I though that I fit this description. The result was that I started acting egocentric and distant in my relationship at that time. Afterwards I learned that I actually wasn't really a "Mr Nice Guy" and this book disturbed the balance and made me actuallty go to much extreme. But if someone is having problems with this, I think it's a good book to start fixing this. Do you have like practical tips that worked for you to start taking action and get out of your head more? F.e. things you say to yourself, actions that make it easier, ..; Anyway right now I'm feeling that I am really being more myself in life and that some persons will accept this and others will never, but that's fine. I think it's an important progress as this is the fundament towards a lot of goals. It's great that we can discuss this and learn from each other, so I hope it stays that way in the future, best of luck for all of you !!
  9. I also was addicted to the online card game Hearthstone and for me personally playing games like yu gi oh in real life, could be a trigger to start with the online card games again. It may totally not be the case for you, but I would suggest to give it a try and if you notice that it makes you get more craving towards online games, then I would also avoid this.
  10. Thanks for sharing Falky and congrats . I agree with most of the things you wrote, there are to many courses for flirting out there and it basically tells to use all kind of techniques, and things you shouldn't do and so on... I also think it's better to start from yourself and maybe only make some small adjustements. For the case of the "friend zone", I agree that it's everywhere very exagerated but some elements hold true. If you wait to long and don't take action, she will see you more and more as a friend, and it would be pretty difficult to change that (not impossible, know examples of people who managed to do it).
  11. Hi Thanks for all the replies everyone :)! Checked out a couple of books already and I'm interested to find out what it will tell. Difficult question to know what it exactly is for me, I think it's a combination of different factors. I think the fear of rejection is one of them, because I think that my ego wouldn't be able to handle it, so that's why my actions stay in my head, instead into reality. The fear of being vulnerable defenitely, it's something I avoided for a long time and I'm still trying to find ways to do this more. When I'm thinking about asking a girl out, there's a part of me that says that it will hurt when she says no, that she's going to tell it to other people I know, that it would be weird, ... . When I think rational about this, I know that these are wrong thinking patterns and that there's nothing wrong with asking someone out, you can only get a yes or a no . But when the time comes to take effective action, the fear takes over and I procrastinate it, till I don't have to do it anymore. Thx everyone for their contributions, I will continue to work on this because I think it's so important in this life and it's a thing I never want to give up on!
  12. Welcome, good luck with quitting games .
  13. Helle everyone The last couple of months I noticed that personally for me getting along with girls goes well and I noticed that some of them showed interest (or I just wanted to see this ). But I'm struggling with the part from this point onwards. There are a few which I like but I'm finding it difficult to take initiative and take it to the next level. I noticed that I start making excuses (bullshit) about why it wouldn't work so I shouldn't do anything and get past the fear. But I really want to get past this point because it's an important goal to me, so I could use all help . I was wondering if any of you had any tips, any thinking processes, books, podcasts, or whatever helped you to get past this point? Any feedback or though process is welcome!
  14. Good luck with quitting . Now you've tried moderation and you learned that it's not for you, that's good to learn!
  15. Totally agree on the fact of not taking all things to seriously. I see a lot of people who take the smallest things way to serious and get all negative and worked up about it. I think it can defenitely help to be calm and confident this way. On the other hand there will always be small things that are more serious for you than other people. But this shouldn't be a problem if you just use thoughts like "I can only do my best and I know that it's important for me, but I'm glad I just tried and went for it"
  16. Hi Johebe Good luck with your journey !
  17. Hey Thanks a lot addict10n !Feel the fear I already read and the six pillars I just purchased. Defenitely gonna check out the other 3.
  18. Hello Coccinust If you are serious about quitting games, I would recommend to not bot. I think this is just going to keep you more connected to the game and it will be harder to quit. Before you start gaming in moderation, I would prove to yourself that you can go without gaming for like a couple of months. This will give you information if gaming in moderation is possible for you. Best of luck with it !!
  19. Hi addict10n Totally agree with you on the fact that you should apply them in reality, instead of just reading about it. A couple of years ago I was also in the process of improving my self-esteem and what helped the most was in fact doing it. You learn things from books and articles, but if you don't apply it, it won't stick. Right now I'm in a place where I want to take the first steps by reading and learning about it and after a while begin to try it out. I think I would like more self-confidence in particular to social situations.
  20. Great it's from Brené Brown, saw a good TedX Video of her a while ago. As vulnerability is defenitely a working point for me, I will check this out . Thanks!!
  21. Hi Linds As someone who used to suffer from social anxiety as well, I know it can be rough and depressing to deal with. You say that it's very hard for you to post on the forum, but you just did that, so that's already a step forward . I guess that makes it more difficult when you're husband is also a gamer, but if you explain this to him, he will probably understand and who knows, he might also want to quit. Good luck!!
  22. Hi Zazie From my own experience in university, I can relate to the fact that it's a vulnerable period for game addiction. You have a lot of free time, there's stress with the different assignements you have to do, ... It's good that you already made this decision at 18 years old, there's a lot of time left for change . The best of luck with it!!
  23. Hello Anyone knows good books regarding self-confidence?
  24. Yeah that was a big clue I guess . I play like 4-5 hours a week and as many tournaments as possible during competition season. I'm really happy that I can practise my passion, because if I wouldn't have had tennis, I would have gamed a lot more in the past I'm afraid. You practise any sports?
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