Avnat Netzer 75 Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 2019-11-03: day 3 This is day 3 of joining game quitters and of my 90 day detox. So far I have had no serious craving to play anything in my steam library. Nothing surprising there. It's typical for me to abstain from games for a little bit after a serious binge which was only last Sunday. It's been made even easier since my fiance is back in town. We typically spend time together hanging out with friends or planning our upcoming wedding. The problem for me is mostly at night. For the past few months I've been staying up late to game often ruining my sleep for the entire week. It's a mostly manageable pattern. I hop onto my laptop after we say goodnight, open up steam, and try to promise myself I won't play past 1am. Sometimes it works but even then I'm so wired it's tough to get my brain to quiet down. My game of choice has been, for most of my life, the strategy game. Civ 3 to 5, a bunch of total war games, and paradox games. It's the sense of accomplishment that draws me back to them again and again. The thrill of starting off small, cracking open a larger opponent, and building an empire out of the ashes. These are usually big games that require planning and research and learning from past failures. I've tried for a while to prove to myself that these lengthy playthroughs are somehow enriching because of how much mental energy I put into them. I know i'm supposed to not only delete these games from my laptop but also delete my entire steam account. So much money and time put into compiling my steam library. There still are games that, even last week, I've been anticipating adding to my collection and carving out time I don't have to play them. It's tough. I know I should but it would be like burning away a part of my identity. I've kind of proudly marked myself as a gamer for so long. It's one of my traits as an active member of the geek culture I subscribe to. I think I just need more time to think about it. A part of me hopes that after the 90 days I can come back to games as a more healthier consumer. So far I've been fine. All of Friday was spent at work and getting ready for the weekend. Saturday was with friends and today was all about wedding planning. Tonight no craving though I'm very awake and might have trouble falling asleep. Usually this would translate to me playing until I get exhausted. Instead I'm going to read, maybe I'll draw a bit too, and hopefully days and nights like these will lead me to being healthier and free. Goodnight - A. N. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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