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Gaming Zombie

Time to get my life back

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Hello,
I am 21 year old guy from Lithuania who is studying medicine and I am a gaming addict.

In short, my problems with controling gaming started in 6th grade. I was bullied for my physical appearance, so i started using computer to escape my problems. I was spending 12 hours daily and missed 1/4 of my lessons every year.. Well, this was no good for me, because i have developed a severe anxiety being around people and lost all of my friends. Even now, writting this i feel anxiety... Anyways, I was living in alternate reality, in strategy offline games with no real people... Also many health problems, like deppresion, eye problems and anothers, started to appear later in life. But somehow, i got myself in medical university. I thought i ll have better life in there, but soon I realised that being a Doctor requires good communication skills, which i lack. So, as time passed, my fellow students abandoned me, because i couldn't hold a normal conversation with them. Whole gaming thing became even more severe... During summer or winter breaks i was wasting 14 hours on computer and plus 2-3 hours on mobile phone daily... Finally, somehow i thought finding a gf will solve everything, so I downloaded a dating app. After dozens of unlucky attempts found one girl i really liked. We were chating, talking through mobile phone almost non stop and it was first time I felt happy in my life... But we needed to meet and I was afraid to fuck things up... so as weeks, months, almost year has passed, I started to playing huge amount of hours again, she lost intereset in me and left for another guy. This was breaking point for me, i went to depression, anger, suicidal thoughts, but at this moment I realised, who is my true enemy - gaming.

So, my main goal would be to repair my communication skills (mainly to loose anxiety being around people) and even some health aspects which were damaged by computer

And secondary goal would be to become huge part of this community and help other people to overcome this addiction

But first, I am still a patient, who have failed to quit gaming month ago and my second attempt started yesterday, but this time i deleted all 340 gb worth of games and started to seek help in this community, so I feel positive about this!

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@Gaming Zombie Hello, I'm Lea. Pleasure to meet you.

You are not alone here. I have to empathize you for problematic communication skills, as I have Asperger's syndrome since I was young. It's really hard for me to open up and make friends, even if the people (notably my classmates in my previous school)  around me are mostly wonderful and awesome. I hope that you succeed this time, and I'm sure that they are wonderful and encouraging people in this community.

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