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Call me Ishmael

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Hey, it's as good an opening line as any.

I honestly don't know if I can do this.

A few years ago, I was diagnosed with some pretty severed ADHD. One of the things I learned is that ADD people can, in some cases, hyperfocus on activities they enjoy. That revelation explained much of my life. When I was in my 20s, as a programmer, I remember very often getting so wrapped in my coding that I'd lose track of time; all of a sudden I'd look up and realize that, not only had all my co-workers gone home, but the cleaning crew had come and gone. It was 1 in the morning, and I hadn't so much as taken a bathroom break in seven hours. 

At least then, I was channeling the hyperfocus into something productive. Later, it became games. So, so many games. I'd get into that "zone" and lose track of time. Forget to eat, forget to piss. Forget to do my work. When I started working from home a couple of years ago, that was it. I'd be lucky to get in an hour of real work for my company a day, compared with seven or so in Last Day on Earth or something equally stupid. 

This time sink is so ingrained into my brain that I'm not sure it can be erased. To truly detox, I might actually have to commit myself to some place that will physically prevent from getting to my iPad or laptop. We'll see. But today is day one.

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Day one:

- I deleted seven games from my iPad.

- Gonna keep it (the iPad) because it's good for other stuff.

- Deleted my Reddit account, since all I ever discussed with that account was games

It hurts -- I have about $250 sunk into World of Warships blitz, and probably close to a grand on Last Day on Earth. But as we learned in module three, that money is already gone; brilliant of Cam to tee up the Sunk Cost Fallacy, something I learned about years ago WRT product marketing, but never thought to apply the principle to gaming. If I'd lost that money  in the stock market, given it to a friend, or doused it in gasoline and set fire to it, the results are the same: It's gone.

So is the time, the shocking amount of time, that I spent on those games. 

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