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About Saab900S

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  1. Saab900S

    Call me Ishmael

    Day one: - I deleted seven games from my iPad. - Gonna keep it (the iPad) because it's good for other stuff. - Deleted my Reddit account, since all I ever discussed with that account was games It hurts -- I have about $250 sunk into World of Warships blitz, and probably close to a grand on Last Day on Earth. But as we learned in module three, that money is already gone; brilliant of Cam to tee up the Sunk Cost Fallacy, something I learned about years ago WRT product marketing, but never thought to apply the principle to gaming. If I'd lost that money in the stock market, given it to a friend, or doused it in gasoline and set fire to it, the results are the same: It's gone. So is the time, the shocking amount of time, that I spent on those games.
  2. Saab900S

    Call me Ishmael

    Hey, it's as good an opening line as any. I honestly don't know if I can do this. A few years ago, I was diagnosed with some pretty severed ADHD. One of the things I learned is that ADD people can, in some cases, hyperfocus on activities they enjoy. That revelation explained much of my life. When I was in my 20s, as a programmer, I remember very often getting so wrapped in my coding that I'd lose track of time; all of a sudden I'd look up and realize that, not only had all my co-workers gone home, but the cleaning crew had come and gone. It was 1 in the morning, and I hadn't so much as taken a bathroom break in seven hours. At least then, I was channeling the hyperfocus into something productive. Later, it became games. So, so many games. I'd get into that "zone" and lose track of time. Forget to eat, forget to piss. Forget to do my work. When I started working from home a couple of years ago, that was it. I'd be lucky to get in an hour of real work for my company a day, compared with seven or so in Last Day on Earth or something equally stupid. This time sink is so ingrained into my brain that I'm not sure it can be erased. To truly detox, I might actually have to commit myself to some place that will physically prevent from getting to my iPad or laptop. We'll see. But today is day one.
  3. ...the big prize. It's likely that I have the longest-running game addiction out there. See, when I first got addicted, it cost money to play Defender or Berzerk. 25 cents a pop kept me in check until the mid 80s. Then I took an Intellivision for my college dorm room in 1984, and that's when my grades started to suffer. Yep. 34+ years. It's the open-ended games that kill me, the just "one more round" or "a few more minutes," then I'll go to bed. Or back to work. How I kept a career going for three decades after being addicted to Quake, followed by Ultima Online, followed by stuff I can't even remember, up until most recently, World of Warships. Ultima Online probably was the #1 killer of my first marriage. The addiction was bad enough, but the sore loser aspects were the worst. I've probably smashed 25 keyboards in the past 20 years. Three iPads. A couple laptops. When I threw an iPad through my condo window last week I knew, this has to stop. I actually have a decent job and make a good living, somehow, even with this issue. I wonder what I could have done with my life if I hadn't wasted an average of three hours a day for 30 years. I wonder. So, here I am. I have to do this. I have to.