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BigPete247

Detox for Shocks

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It seems like you've had a really good day and might end up with a great friend. I think it's great you've met another veteran, since that is quite a big thing to have in common.

The fact that you shredded the magazine without second thoughts is really a good sign of your progress. I don't know the magazine, but I asume you've spent money on it, which could easily have made you hesitant. Instead you were strong and quickly got rid of it. 

It's called Game Informers, it was a subscription that i signed up for a while ago under GameStop, it costs in store points and reloaded when the 12 months were up. As long as you have points on a ProRewards Card they give you similar rewards, but since i used cash mostly, im regretting it. Glad to get rid of it and be done with GameStop tbh.

Edited by BigPete247

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Day 8:

I dropped my hot pocket...i still can't believe i went a full week without installing any game of any kind yesterday, feel proud. I actually started looking up Forza Motorsport videos on youtube but luckily the guy was bad at playing (wasn't triggered) and i started watching Blind Commentaries on new episodes of TV Shows instead, and they were pretty funny. Took my first set of notes in class today and have a full schedule to do for next week in 3 out of 4 of my classes. 2 of them being my Psych class in the same block, back to back.

Still penniless, i just have to stay motivated to get through this semester without slumping back into my old comfort zone. I recently talked with my school counselor about joining an organization within the college, i hope she emails me back so i find out what's available. But all in all, my day was very productive and i'm glad i got a lot done today w/o procrastinating or playing on my phone. Now onto the weekend.

I'm Grateful for: Being able to drive where i needed to go and my phone bill being unpaid

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Sounds like you're really pursuing more constructive activities in your life. I'm thinking of organizations to join myself to give myself more to do. I'm so sorry you dropped your hot pocket. I love those!

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Day 8:

I dropped my hot pocket...i still can't believe i went a full week without installing any game of any kind yesterday, feel proud.

I recently talked with my school counselor about joining an organization within the college, i hope she emails me back so i find out what's available.

Awesome, I'm proud of you, bro!

Buzz that counselor in a nice way, until he/she has no other way, but to hook you up with something. The counselor can't really dismiss you persistence.

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Day 9:

@Vlad, of course don't want to heckle anybody on my first week of school.

What? No way i'm beginning my weekend with no gaming, said no one ever. But still though, i've been a good boy as far as fighting off those urges to download and play something, now i can't even remember what system i was playing on before i quit. XD. So to award myself for quitting gaming for a whole 7 days, i cleaned up the house a little and cooked my grandmother some of my world famous pancakes today. Which i didn't burn for the first time.

My throat's been congested lately, probably due to the fact that my room gets icy after my grandmother plays around with the AC during the night, leaving me with a sickly pined voice. So, i took some more pills. Good thing is that i have a free weekend from my schoolwork, for now.

 

Crap almost forgot, I'm grateful for my cooking skills and not procrastinating.

Edited by BigPete247

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Day 10:

Services was great,  I tried to be nice to this one deaf girl in church as she isn't big on social interactions, but she looked really good looking, sad i don't know sign language.  Had that nasty cough and my nose was still congested today, slightly felt better afterwards. It's also getting even harder to monitor everything my grandmother does but she moves around constantly (if she isn't sitting on the couch), but the challenge is to hold on and be patient with her.

She can't really cook or do things herself so she gets me or dad to do round the clock stuff, even if it doesn't make sense, still its a challenge. Had no urges today, guess it was like somebody turned off my ambition for gaming. I checked out my online assignment planner and there was no assignments posted yet by any of my teachers, might be a good thing, won't actually know until i go back to school on Monday. 

 

I'm grateful for my sense of humor and being an usher.

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Glad you had a great day, BigPete...I've been starting a new church these past couple of weeks and it's good to be around a new community.

Getting active with a church can improve on your reliability as well as being social within the community, glad you found a church home Mettermrck

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Day 10:

Services was great,  I tried to be nice to this one deaf girl in church as she isn't big on social interactions, but she looked really good looking, sad i don't know sign language.  Had that nasty cough and my nose was still congested today, slightly felt better afterwards. It's also getting even harder to monitor everything my grandmother does but she moves around constantly (if she isn't sitting on the couch), but the challenge is to hold on and be patient with her.

She can't really cook or do things herself so she gets me or dad to do round the clock stuff, even if it doesn't make sense, still its a challenge. Had no urges today, guess it was like somebody turned off my ambition for gaming.

Bro, respect for doing what you do! It's the self-implied obligations that push us to grow. Caring for others makes us stronger and increase our influence , social weight if you will. Dominance is all about territory, where you set rules and order and uphold those. People we love and care for are also figuratively "territory". In a perfect world positions of power are assigned based on that only. I.e. a mayor cares about the inhabitants of a town/city, they feel it and elect him and only because of that what he says goes. It's great that you have experience of caring for other people, you're leveling up in the real world.

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Day 11:

@Vlad, thanks man, hearing that from you...it means a lot. Sometimes, it's important to respect yourself first before respecting others. Good seeds, man, good seeds.

Everyone where i live is preparing for the solar eclipse in a few hours, might be able to see it; might not, hopefully they might be able to show it live on TV . I finished my homework assignments for today reacting to Thomas Jefferson's autobiography and The Declaration of Independence, feels good to be reminded of our rights to fight for freedom and democracy. It didn't take me long to read and write a page for each, should be enough for my professor to read since he didn't give us any clear way to do the assignment. Or post it online.

But afterwards i awarded myself with reading Tom Clancy's book Threat Vector, so far i'm about 25% into it and its not a bad series if you're into wartime strategy, espionage, and covert military operations. I want to get more books like this one for the following months to enhance my visual thinking, because i'm bad at memory and CT atm.

I oddly started to have relaxed feelings of gaming, even when i sold everything, like i had a mental trigger to play my system now. Instead, i drew it out, literally drawing how i felt at that time. So, all in all i'm having a good day so far.

 

I'm grateful for my expressive creativity and multitude of books.

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I oddly started to have relaxed feelings of gaming, even when i sold everything, like i had a mental trigger to play my system now. Instead, i drew it out, literally drawing how i felt at that time. So, all in all i'm having a good day so far.

Is this some kind of art therapy? If it's not I might be not getting the sentence. ^^'

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I oddly started to have relaxed feelings of gaming, even when i sold everything, like i had a mental trigger to play my system now. Instead, i drew it out, literally drawing how i felt at that time. So, all in all i'm having a good day so far.

Is this some kind of art therapy? If it's not I might be not getting the sentence. ^^'

Yeah, you can call it that HappyCat, it helps to draw what's on my mind and to show my creativity, so to not lose my mind in solitude. It's like meditating, but more low brow.

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Cool. I visited some sort of not-so-standart trainig group where the main point of every exercise was to give one's brain unusual work. One of these was drawing out your condition at the moment. It was not quite artistic drawing, always ended up as pretty abstract art) Color choice was good indicator of whether one was going towards overly passive or overly active state.

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Cool. I visited some sort of not-so-standart trainig group where the main point of every exercise was to give one's brain unusual work. One of these was drawing out your condition at the moment. It was not quite artistic drawing, always ended up as pretty abstract art) Color choice was good indicator of whether one was going towards overly passive or overly active state.

Heh, never thought color in certain drawings was a determinant for mental stability, i usually would draw my pictures with a blue or red hue. Cool,

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I read a ton of Tom Clancy back in the day. Most of what I know about modern tanks, ships, and aircraft come from his books. ?

Nice, do you remember the Ops Center series, Mettermrck?

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Yes I remember those...and Net Force...

I read a ton of Tom Clancy back in the day. Most of what I know about modern tanks, ships, and aircraft come from his books. ?

Nice, do you remember the Ops Center series, Mettermrck?

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Yes I remember those...and Net Force...

I read a ton of Tom Clancy back in the day. Most of what I know about modern tanks, ships, and aircraft come from his books. ?

Nice, do you remember the Ops Center series, Mettermrck?

 

Cool, you know that's honestly how it all started with the main protagonist being recruited to do espionage work, Jack Ryan, in the Net Force and Ops Center series, i didn't get a chance to see the movie in 2016 though. Since Clancy died, the books didn't have any good authors except Greaney.

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Day 12:

Felt good in my abnormal psychology class today as i gave an example on the question of how do people with misinterpreted and misperceived behaviors react in reality. I responded with "gaming, as it causes brain-rot", got those nonchalant looks by a few, heh. I forgot to do one of my assignments in another class but luckily my professor extended the due date and allowed us to finish the essay paper by Thursday. Didn't waste no time so I went and knocked it out at home, took me a few hours but i feel accomplished.

Earlier, as i was heading to my car, i noticed that a girl i introduced in class last week kept taking quick glances at me, so i waved at her and smiled and she smiled back and laughed. Could i have finally pulled of that potential date? idk.

It's just interesting how so many people in college can think critically but are really opinionated.  I recently started drawing again on a makeshift notebook and posted what i drew on DeviantArt, an online art page dedicated to artists, for the first time. I wanted to break my comfort zone and chat with other artists to share art related opinions with, so that's what i did. Got no views yet, i just need to keep drawing, they'll come. Might also read a few more Tom Clancy chapters before tonight.

As i started thinking about my gaming past, i realized that i really lost interest in playing. The group i was gaming with noticed that and actually wondered why i was playing with people younger than me if i had real life responsibilities. Had no real answer.

Anyways, my cold's getting better as i wasn't dying in my bed this morning, come to find out that the AC was clogged with dust. Not fun. Below is my goals i put up from before, since @Hitaru pointed out my mistake on the Forums. ; )

 

My Goals:

-Maintain a 4.0 GPA

-Get my car fixed

-Manage finances better

 

I'm Grateful for not procrastinating and meeting people.

 

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Day 13:

Just a quick post, my life is slowly getting off to the right track, my mind feels clearer and i feel more confident day by day, i'm more focused and attentive, and i can remember what i did from last week. I actually wanted to thank you guys, including Cam, for understanding my situation and not beating me up too bad, XD. I've learned a whole lot from just reading your journals and i was a mess, mentally. I just hope i haven't offended anyone with what i posted on here, if i did i apologize. As i believe in treating everyone fairly can have some benefits, but only if you relate with something positive. Here's to another day without gaming.

I'm grateful for not gaming and understanding people.

Edited by BigPete247

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