No more gatcha garbo, ever again.

[Kaizal]

Also keeping in mind that my judgment isn't super clear right now just because I didn't play games in 3 months. So all of this I'll talk over with my therapist and get her input, if anyone is reading I would also appreciate the input in this specific instance

[pdallair91]

1 hour ago, Kaizal said:

So all of this I'll talk over with my therapist and get her input [...]

A psychotherapist, correct?  That would be the most sensible means advisers to consult about cognition and behavior, especially the self-destructive kind that sticks.  That said, I'm not one of those so everything following shouldn't be taken too seriously.

> Nothing in my life has gotten way better because I quit playing games, even though I was going to the gym quite a bit and enjoyed it.  Talking and hanging out with friends just like normal.

Nothing in your life has gotten way better *yet*! <caption for Homer Simpson giving Bart advice> 😅 Wholesome jokes aside, your statement comes off, to me, as unnecessarily judgemental/pessimistic towards the "things" in your life (if not yourself in particular).  To be fair, I have no idea what those things are considering we are complete strangers.  HOWEVER, I do find that I often impede my own motivation or satisfaction with a clouded perspective.  It's completely normal, quite necessary from an evolutionary perspective in fact, to make quick judgements from incomplete information.  Unsurprisingly, it's probably helpful when we are judging important things to keep in mind that we might be wrong, that there often isn't an absolute answer.  As Obi-Wan once said: "Only the Sith deal in absolutes." (I suffer from BPD, so I tend to have an "all or nothing" or "black and white" perspective on things and this quote helps sometimes) You've already given it some thought and found positive things to hilight! 😁 I'm sure that if you keep doing that and give yourself more time one day you will look back and confidently deliver the alternative judgement; that *some* things in your life have *reasonably* improved.

> I feel like the problem to me are specifically the kind of games that try to fuck with my brain to get to give them money.

Yeah, fuck 'em! 😡

> And the rest are just fun games, that I overplay whenever I feel bad, but I have a good time with them, and they don't make me feel bad if everything else in my life is in order.

Addictive behavior is (arguably at least) a symptom of underlying cognitive problems.  The main reason why most of us keep resorting to excess despite the consequences racking up is because it's a temporary escape from suffering.  So, yeah, it makes sense to overplay when we feel bad.  The problem isn't so much feeling bad however (IMO).  The problem is that addicts simply haven't mastered the skills needed to cope with their suffering.

I don't know about you but I am convinced, deep down, that I shouldn't suffer, that I should feel "good" all the time.  Unfortunately, this is not a realistic desire to have. So, when facing problems that are largely outside of my control, or that don't just go away on their own, this desire unfulfilled only makes for more suffering.  I am glad that you mentioned having a therapist.  I am consulting one too.  These are the most qualified to help us identify, acquire what's missing.

Good luck moving forward.  Take care.

[Zubb]

Congrats on hitting your 90 days and accepting a gacha free life. That must be quite a load off your mind.

I'll also add that sitting with ones negative thoughts can be a wonderful opportunity for introspection and growth given the right framework. Conversely, the more we try to shut them out, the more they'll inevitably increase the various anxieties and complexes that frequently hold us back, acting as a kind of negative feedback loop. I know you don't take well to unsolicited advice, but I pretty much guarantee that any mental health professional would agree that it can be a helpful practice.