NEW VIDEO: I Stopped Gaming And THIS Happened
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Entry 28.11 (Written on 29.11) Day 430: No Useless Videos Day 429: Sticking to Food schedule Day 32: Eating Only between 06:30 and 19:00 (Last bite before 19:00) Day 22: Being in bed before 23:15  3 Things I did right, no matter how small. -10 pomodoros -3 hours deliveries -1 hour job search (speaking with 3 potential job places, and 2 more just calling without reasponse + some resumes sending) 1 Thing I could do better -Having planned for placing groceries in the fridge. Time Lost: LEaving this blank since I'm 13 minutes out of timeframe
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Entry 27.11 (Written on 29.11) Day 429: No Useless Videos Day 428: Sticking to Food schedule Day 31: Eating Only between 06:30 and 19:00 (Last bite before 19:00) Day 21: Being in bed before 23:15  3 Things I did right, no matter how small. -Weighing myself before a bi-weekly food order - Weight 55.4 kg, this is 100g underweight. I am unsure if there was a change since last measurement since last measurement was made after breakfast and was 56.0 kg, which just the breakfast weighs that much. In any case, the safest bet would be to raise calories further... which I shall do in next two weeks iteration since I ordered in a haste again without changes X_x -Ordering food for two weeks, it's a tremendous time saver. My own purchase took about 25 minutes and for apartment mates 30 more. Cuts at least half of the time. (Especially if the apartment mates wouldn't change the foods they order like myself 😉 -Having planned a longer job search for tomorrow since I make it apoint to change only the next day, and the last GQ entry was written this day. 1 Thing I could do better -Ponder how to go back to eating food and doing pomodoros separately Time Lost: At a quick glance, about 25 minutes away from lunch timeframe - about 15 minutes because of cooking dates 15 minutes away from breakfast timeframe 20 minutes taking unplanned call from a potential real-estate course Went out for deliveries about 1 hour late
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"Everything feels like work." reminded me of @BooksandTrees and his journal. He solved something similar and I think it's even the exact phrase. My opinion: I guess the mental signal you're getting is to live a little. Life isn't only about ticking off chores and improving habits. It's not a carte blanche to stop trying and to do stupid shit, but probably a sign to slow down. I sometimes have it too, so I just sit with myself a while and reflect on the successes I've had in the last months/years and really feel them through and appreciate them. Burnout is no good.
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Day 83 - Monday (yesterday) Summary: Something is happening to me. I feel like everything is starting to slip, but only for the good habits. Looking at my "Habits to Kick" section, all has been going well. My feeling inside is that I have ultimately conquered those. And yet, it seems along with a good habit, I've created a bad one - anytime I read at night, I fall asleep on the couch and don't get up. I even know I should get up but just... can't? Won't? I'm not sure. Maybe I'm burned out. I did spend a few hours outside finishing the lights. It was very cold, so I really needed time to warm up when I came in. Still, something feels off, as though I've just taken the on-ramp to monotony. While I love reading, it seems like the only thing I do now in the evening. Everything feels like work. Am I overwhelmed? Possibly. I'm trying to do/maintain so many things but have the impression that I can't do any of them "right." I want to change my diet by prepping food and eating enough so that I gain enough weight, but I only am able to prep food half the time. I want to exercise 4 times a week but lately have only been managing 2-3. (It's split Upper/Lower 2x each, and I want to maintain balance). I want to journal and record my life, my memories, but I fail to get up in the evening to do it. I want to go to sleep in my bed and get enough rest (7 hours might be good), but I can't move off the couch and never seem to want to give up on the evening. I want to be awake early to read and re-engage my spiritual life, but I'm only awake about 30 minutes before I need to log on for work. I want to live in a clean home and maintain it, but my habit of cleaning something once a day seems to be slipping. I want to live a life full of interesting hobbies, where I have the energy to care for the things around me, but now it seems I just want to sit on the couch and fall asleep (even though I've been reading, which I'm grateful for).  I think it's time I do a reassessment. While I want to be able to see out the chart to the end of the 90 days, I think it may have outlived its purpose. It has shown me trends, when certain habits influence others, etc. However, I've also noticed that it has given me this idea that there is a "more right" way of doing things than simply doing the thing. This has then directed my thoughts instead from my successes to where there are still gaps. Thus, every day I fill in my journal, unless it's 4.5 stars or above, I begin to feel like I have failed. The goal is habit transformation, not perfection. Tomorrow, I'm going to start tracking on Everyday, which was recommended to me by @Antoni. I'm going to ease up on the success criteria and begin with just a few. I may still track the habits to kick, since those seem to be taking care of themselves, but I'll start with just a few. Going to bed seems to be the cornerstone, having cascading effects on everything else. I will focus only on getting up to bed. If I finish all of my nightly routine, great. If not, it's okay. The goal right now is going to be: be in bed between x and y time. I will slowly build from there. I'll still track trying to clean stuff in the house, but I'm not going to hold it against myself if I can't do it every day. Not right now. Sleep is the most important piece I need to fix. I may have been uncharitable towards myself earlier in this post. I've had great success in kicking a habit that has plagued me for years, filling it with meaningful time, activities, and people. While I'm a bit saddened I'm ending the chart here, the most important lesson to learn is to change things when they are clearly no longer working. I know that I can have success with this. I just need to be more gracious towards myself and begin slowly.  PROGRESS UPDATES: Note: Bold purple text indicates a new change to a plan. Habits to Kick: YouTube - Day 98: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Did not watch. Plan: No changes needed but continue to fill the void, and with activities from hobbies list. Excessive Streaming: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Did not watch. Plan: Continue current behavior. Find new ways to spend time when you need passive entertainment. Add a tag to your task list to filter for those. No Podcast Listening - Day 49: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Did not listen. Plan: For the rest of the 90 days, I will not listen to any podcasts. I may even try to make this its own one-off 90-day journey, even after the main one is complete. If I need background, I can put on light jazz or Brain.FM while working. Be aware of the physical and emotional sensation and name it when you feel stressed. Excessive Gaming: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Did not game. Plan: Continue current behavior. Set a time limit if you do play by yourself (1-2 hours). If with friends, keep it only to a Friday or Saturday and do your best to log off at a reasonable hour. Excessive Drinking - Day 107: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Had one standard drink. Plan: Determine ahead of time how much you will drink before events. When there are weeks without events, try to keep drinks to 2-3 a week or less (zero is of course totally fine). Habits to Start: I will add to this as I determine new habits and their action plans. Journal (physical journal): Adherence: ☆☆☆☆☆ Description: Did not journal. Plan: I will continue to journal before getting ready for bed. Set your timer to remind you. Game Quitters Journal: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Filling it out now. Plan: Continue filling out journal each day. Doesn't seem to matter if it's the same day or the next, as long as each day is entered. Healthy Ways to Fill the Void: Adherence: ★★★★★ Description: Read in the evening. Finished decorating outside the house. Applied to another job. Exercise: Upper Body A Plan: Continue routine and choose activities. Reading is good, but also being comfortable doing nothing while listening to music (or just sitting) is fine too. Plan activities for when you have low energy. Pomodoros: Adherence: ★★★★☆ Description: Completed 6 pomodoros. Plan:  I will start by setting a goal of 8. I adjusted the scoring to encompass a range of completion. A perfect score is 8 pomodoros or more. The stars correspond as follows (star: pomodoros complete): 1: 1; 2: 2; 2.5: 3; 3: 4; 3.5: 5; 4: 6; 4.5: 7; 5: 8+. Each pomodoro will be 25 minutes. Some days are more meeting-heavy than others, so I will count meetings as well where the intent is to focus only on the meeting and taking notes. No multi-tasking. Consistent Bedtime: Adherence: ☆☆☆☆☆ Description: Did not go to bed. Plan: Focus on the time you wake up. If your workout takes an hour, try to be up at 5:50am so that you have a few minutes to get ready. May need to start at 6:30 depending on how your body feels. Begin slow and walk back the time. Use Alarmy to get you up both in the evening and in the morning using the picture setting. Cleaning Up: Adherence: ★★☆☆☆ Description: Did some tidying up but nothing crazy. Plan: 0 stars is nothing was done; 1-4 stars is I cleaned one thing OR tidied up, depending on effort. 5 stars is I cleaned one thing AND tidied up. The "thing" cleaned can be big or small, doesn't matter. List of Hobbies I can choose from: Listening to and/or caring for records Reading Writing (notes from reading, etc.) Working on my cars Socializing Foreign language study Cooking Walking the dog Mocktails Writing on my blog (need to restart) Investing in relationships Exercise
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