JSmith

Captain's Log - JSmith | 9.4.2016 | Day 64 Sorry for not getting a post out last night, was legit slacking. I don't think I treat my journal here as rigidly as I do my other daily tasks, because it's not actually a task. I should probably add it, but it's moot at this point. Day started off pretty good, then turned meh. Got hit with a wave of loneliness right before karate. It happens sometimes...I don't even remember what triggered it. But it doesn't help to focus on the thing that is upsetting you, I should have found something to work on or just diverted my attention immediately or something. Or perhaps it's trying to tell me something. As I walked to the gym I kept hammering myself with questions and doubts. Why am I even doing karate? Would I still want to do it if I had a girlfriend? Would I still want to do ANYTHING I'm doing if I had a girlfriend? I keep bringing myself back to questions like these. Like sometimes I just don't give a damn about other things in comparison. The main reason I joined karate is because it was a fun form of physical exercise, but there's more to it. It makes me feel powerful, strong, and I like winning in competitions. I like the idea of being able to impress people with skill and tenacity, and I like the idea of ranking up. But none of these things really matter. Sensei has said it many times over. So why dedicate 8 hours a week to this? I can just go to the gym and ride a bike for 20 minutes three times a day, there's my exercise. The cardio is what's most important for a person like me. I feel WEAK for even sharing these types of feelings, or HAVING them for that matter. I don't know why. I have always desired power, ever since I was a child. But I have also desired companionship. Would I care about such things if I just had someone? About a week or two ago one of the female students on campus finally returned to train with us after the whole summer off. I had a crush on her a couple semesters ago, and yet when I saw her again, suddenly I had this internal impulse. Train harder, show her how much you've improved, she'll be watching. And I did. LOL. Certainly wouldn't have done that if I was just training alone, which has happened before. And yet the situation is paradoxical, because despite how much I want a relationship, I have very little time during the week to actually commit to one as much as I would want, and I don't take ANY action to go out and actually talk to girls, because I believe it's just hopeless. Maybe I don't actually want a girlfriend, not here anyways.I'm just a mess in this department. BUT HEY AT LEAST I HAVE SOME NEAT SOLIDWORKS STUFF TO SHOW YOU ALL IM TAKING A TUTORIAL ON 3D SKETCHING, MAKING AN OVEN RACK. LIKE THE ONES IN ACTUAL OVENS. SEE THE RESEMBLANCE YET? I'M PUTTING IN ALL THE GRID COLUMNS TOMORROW. Anyways I literally just wasted like 20 minutes getting lost in past events, so now I really have to go. Have a good night. Three things I'm thankful for: 1. Getting my new gym bag before karate class 2. Getting some oreo creme pie during lunch. They were actually saving it for dinner, but I saw the dude cutting the pieces and just asked for one. Great guy. 3. Labor day tomorrow, so no classes. I'll need the extra time to finish my physics homework. No more pasting the master plan, I know what I need to do...

No, I don't mind at all. The simple answer for that question is because I feel I've had enough of it. There also the fact that I'm outdated that helped me step away. You know technology, if you blink, you might miss something. The long answer, I have to tell you why I choose engineering first. In Brazil, you couldn't live a comfortable life unless you had either university degree on something the market wanted or you were a civil servant. At least that what I was taught by my parents, both civil servants. Back in the 90's, there were only three profitable professions: Doctors, Lawyers and Engineers/Architects. Anything other than that meant financial struggle. On my second year of highschool, I thought about becoming a psychologist, perhaps because I had many people coming to me and asking for advice. But then I was convinced by my aunt that I should pick one of those 3 afore mentioned. I always had top grades in mathematics, and I liked computers so I choose engineering. Engineering was super cool, but I never had true passion for it. I once thought about changing my major to physics, because that's what I loved, but then again, I was afraid of ending up not making enough money to raise a family. So I kept on, graduated eventually and started working as a product engineer in the electricity metering business. My work was somewhat challenging, not in terms of engineering, because after my graduation, everything seemed to be easy. The challenge was to work in an organization environment and to cope with not so good rules. Yet I was kind of successful on what I did, but I got a bit tired of working with computers and machines. Then I decided to live with near my girlfriend here in Japan and now we are married and I'm her dependant. Oh, it hurts saying that (the dependant part). Anyway, the pinnacle of an engineering career for me would be me having a say in the AI industry and contribute to its development. And when I picture myself in that position, I don't see me happy. Successful, yes, but not happy. So, I don't see a point in continuing on this path, and I'm sick of working for money. I don't regret anything, well, maybe some things, and I thought it was time to close this chapter and start another one. Anyway, sorry for cluttering your beautifully written journal. I hope I could answer your question. I see you are very passionate about space engineering, I hope I didn't make you have second thoughts! Thank you for sharing your experiences! I've had plenty of second thoughts about engineering on my own (remember my first post?), mostly because I wasn't doing very well in school and I could never seem to hold the short bursts of motivation I got from watching space launches on youtube haha. "Nowadays" I'm more worried about if my dreams related to space travel are really possible. We have done some pretty amazing things in space, yet I want so much more. Am I being too unrealistic? Both Jeff Olson and Napoleon Hill advise that you attatch timelines to your dreams, but I have no freaking idea of the kind of time that would be necessary for them to come true. There's too many variables. My greatest fear is spending several more years down this path and realizing it was all hopeless to begin with. Then what would I do?

Oh, this brings me back so many memories! From the college days? What made you want to step away from engineering? If you don't mind me asking.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 9.2.2016 | Day 62 Another good day. I'm kind of drawing a blank right now. Was just browsing through some of the other journals while waiting for my roommate's gaming friends to clear out of the room. Still awkward. Uhmm, I'm a little concerned I may not be studying enough. I have physics homework due towards the start of next week, with a bunch of other assignments following. It's freaking ridiculous. I spent 3 out of 4 pomodoros on it today and solved 0 problems. And the damn physics help center doesn't open until AFTER it's due. For now I'll stick to it, but if Labor Day comes around and I'm still not finished, welp, I'll have to pull overtime, and make modifications. I also may need to spend more time on dynamics, the professor isn't very good... At least I finished A Brief History of Time today. Thank the cosmos! I've had enough about M-Theory for now, I just want to dig in to this year's AIAA competitions. So from now on I'll dedicate that pomodoro to related research and planning (it's still aerospace). Master plan version 3! Interesting Solidworks lesson today. Using equations to relate and modify various part dimensions. Just another absolutely batshit feature of the program. I am definitely building a spaceship with this thing one day. Oh shoot, I forgot about the lightsaber too. That one I may be able to do sooner haha. I could probably write an entire page about the recent SpaceX Falcon 9 explosion, but it's late, and I need to get to bed. Maybe another time. Things I'm grateful for: 1. Having friends to set me up for transportation to this year's Fall Karate Camp 2. Some good laughs from a friend this morning. Made my day. 3. Movies, for being awesome. SPACE CAPTAIN'S ULTIMATE MASTER PLAN FOR SUCCESS - VERSION 3 - Studying, 4 pomodoros - 750 words, no longer than 1 pomodoro - Solidworks, 1 pomodoro - Personal Development reading, 1 pomodoro (Think and Grow Rich) - Team Space Transportation Design, 1 pomodoro (I don't even know if our group will select this one, but they better...) - Novel Work, 1 pomodoro - One To-Do list task completed per day MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Studying, 4 pomodoros

A glimpse back in time! Nice email. You make accomplishing your dreams sound easy I feel like stranded Chuck Noland from Cast Away when it comes to getting a girlfriend.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 9.1.2016 | Day 61 Happy September folks! Today was a decent day. Had just my one class in the morning (no lab until the 12th) and then got right to work getting all my tasks done. All tomatoes completed around 2:30-ish. Decided to reward myself with a movie I haven't seen in a long time, Reign of Fire. Oh, the nostalgia. Couple emotional blips later on in the day. I went to eat after the movie and found all three of my closest friends sitting together. None of them had asked if I wanted to join them, which I found off-putting since they usually send me a text for stuff like that. I hope it's not because of all the times I declined earlier. I've been working a lot and there are conflicts; still I told them when I would be free...but I just joined them at the time and we had a good time, so I guess it's not that big a deal. Then I got another staff email from my old roleplaying site, which especially bothered me because I had been getting a couple in the last week or two and usually I ignore them, thinking it wouldn't be that frequent. And then I get this one. Definitely triggered some more nostalgia actually logging back into the site just to clear the email notifications, I'll even admit I skimmed through a list of post titles from people looking for partners. But I shook it off, and got the fuck out of there. I know where that road leads. Just spent the last hour or so trying to shorten my growing list of To-Do tasks, making some decent progress. Should feel less stressed about it now, and the 1 task a day goal will take care of the rest. Some of the deadlines were just getting a little close, so I had to take care of them now. So I have another karate exam on Wednesday. Which is the same day as our club demonstration. Which is right after the campus involvement fair. Oh the nerves. If I rank up 1 kyu then I can get brown belt in December. I went to every practice for all of August, but I may need to train a little extra these next few classes. So day 60 was yesterday...my how things progress. Now that the semester is officially here things have changed a lot from four days ago, when I was still working. But I have kept all my goals the same, only added a few, and it has really paid off. My sleep schedule is solid, I wake up alert and eager to get shit done, I actually get shit done, and I'm feeling in pretty decent shape. Both physically and mentally. Now my objective for the next 15 (14...) days is to just keep it going. I don't care what the hell else happens during the day, but as long as I follow the master plan goals, I have confidence I'll be on track for great success. Of course things haven't been perfect, but I've noticed the habits are starting to do more of the work now. I've also noticed I actually feel something when I go about my day, a little bit of excitement or anticipation here and there (or maybe that's just day 59 haha), which is a big step over two months ago. Don't recall feeling any gaming urges lately...then again Solidworks IS the real Minecraft. Can't think of anything else to add, so I guess that wraps it up for now. Have a wonderful night everyone. Things I'm grateful for: 1. Seeing another friend after many months. 2. Payday today! One more work check in two weeks. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ 3. Strong start to Japanese. Pace seems very manageable, and it's been a lot of fun. SPACE CAPTAIN'S ULTIMATE MASTER PLAN FOR SUCCESS - VERSION 2 - Studying, 4 pomodoros - 750 words, no longer than 1 pomodoro - Solidworks, 1 pomodoro - Personal Development reading, 1 pomodoro (Think and Grow Rich) - Aerospace related reading, 1 pomodoro (A Brief History of Time - should be done with this thing any day now...oh crap, I need to figure out my next book) - Novel Work, 1 pomodoro - One To-Do list task completed per day MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Studying, 4 pomodoros

I joined 29 days after I started the detox, remember? What's special about September 4th? Also I unfortunately don't have any time to write tonight...chose to work on some really important business instead (I've been so busy today). Will have to make it up to you all tomorrow. Sorry!

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.30.2016 | Day 59 Holy crap, tomorrow is Day 60. Didn't I just do my Day 45 review???? Anyways, today was a very good day. My master plan worked to perfection, and despite even being slow to get the ball rolling after my first class (very slow, ran into a slight issue), I had all 7/7 goals completed before 4:30pm. In 80 minutes of studying I manged to complete an entire online physics lecture and review exercise, figure out a conceptual issue I had with yesterday's Dynamics lecture, and memorize more than half of all Japanese Hiragana symbols. Pretty solid work. I am SUPER pumped for this year's AIAA (American Institute of Aeronautics and Astronautics) Design Competitions. Last year I enrolled as a student member in the organization, and in our university chapter, participating in the Team Space Design competition. Basically we designed an entire mission to take a small satellite to a nearby asteroid; I was in charge of propulsion selection. We didn't win, but I learned a shit ton about rockets and space flight, and had a lot of fun as well. I probably would have mentioned this way earlier actually if it wasn't for starting in the summer haha. This year's competitions are even better. One of them involves taking NASA's new SLS rocket and basically designing your own space mission to a destination beyond Earth/Lunar orbit, from scratch. Crewed or Uncrewed. How awesome is that! The rush of excitement I felt reading the RFP document...I haven't felt like that since I played a video game. Finally, eh? I can still feel it a little right now. Can we just start TOMORROW please??? I also went back to the lab after dinner to do some extra solidworks practice, wanting to get more done. This advanced design tutorial is actually pretty...well...advanced. In this part I had to use a previous sketch (the gray vertical lines) as a guide for drawing cuts on a different sketch along the top edge of the hinge. But somewhere along the two sketches something was going wrong with the lines, either they were overlapping or not connecting all the way. Solidworks would throw a hissy fit every time I tried to make the cuts. Eventually I threw a hissy fit because I was literally just following the tutorial's instructions... So I said screw it, and redrew the lines on my own, in a way I thought made more sense. It worked! You can see on the left hand features tree I made two versions of the part: one w/ two inside square cuts and the other w/ three outside cuts. Fantastic. Not even close to being done yet though haha. Looking forward to classes and karate tomorrow. Hopefully my master plan works under the increased lecture hours. We'll see. Things I'm grateful for: 1. My brain, for actually doing something in solidworks on it's own for once. 2. Awesome design competitions this year! I was worried, but AIAA definitely stepped it up from last year. Well, given my tastes at least. 3. Free school supplies??? I think somebody messed up at the cash register when I made my initial spree. I asked them today why the charge isn't yet on my account, and there's nothing they can do lol. Fine by me. This is everything new for today. The copied master plan below is just for my reference. Goodnight! SPACE CAPTAIN'S ULTIMATE MASTER PLAN FOR SUCCESS - VERSION 2 - Studying, 4 pomodoros - 750 words, no longer than 1 pomodoro - Solidworks, 1 pomodoro - Personal Development reading, 1 pomodoro (Think and Grow Rich) - Aerospace related reading, 1 pomodoro (A Brief History of Time) - Novel Work, 1 pomodoro - One To-Do list task completed per day (tacking this on at the end, list is kinda long right now, duration will vary, will probably take this out of eating time, or breaks) MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Studying, 4 pomodoros

Good luck with Solidworks

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.29.2016 | Day 58 Your captain's master plan has failed. I return to you all in shame. I overestimated the amount I could get done on a day with four hours of classes and karate training. By the time I had Dynamics at 3:30 I had only accomplished my 750 words, solidworks practice (I did this and the journal in the morning, before I had my first class), and four pomodoros of studying. The only break I took was lunch. I thought long and hard about why it was I got so little done, and it really comes down to just how my day is structured. When you are doing so much in one day, the smaller things start to have more of an impact. Things like having to stop by your dorm to switch out materials after classes, or walking from lunch to classes or the library, or having to leave early to prepare your training clothes, or how about needing to EAT before karate class. Yeah that's kind of important. I need food after lunch too... I soon realized my current plan was not very feasible, and immediately began to brainstorm and think about how I could further optimize things so it would be possible to repeat the same exact tasks, every single day, regardless of class structure. I would rather build consistency and do less, than try to pack in more on certain days and risk failure. So, in the spirit of not giving up, I present to you the first iteration of my master plan. SPACE CAPTAIN'S ULTIMATE MASTER PLAN FOR SUCCESS - VERSION 2 Removing the academic part so I can condense it with my other goals and eliminate repetition. Class work will still be first priority. - Studying, 4 pomodoros - 750 words, no longer than 1 pomodoro - Solidworks, 1 pomodoro - Personal Development reading, 1 pomodoro (Think and Grow Rich) - Aerospace related reading, 1 pomodoro (A Brief History of Time - I'm almost done with this, considering studying orbital mechanics or rocket propulsion next, or maybe I'll try to decipher Harold White's Warp Field Mechanics 101 XD) - Novel Work, 1 pomodoro - One To-Do list task completed per day (tacking this on at the end, list is kinda long right now, duration will vary, will probably take this out of eating time, or breaks) MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Studying, 4 pomodoros Nine pomodoros total, or 3 hours. If you discount the 750 words (I do it first thing in the morning and it usually takes less than 20 mins.) half the time is studying. My brain is cringing at a "mere" 80 minutes, but it's going to be focused studying. Focused as in I don't hit the start button until I'm in my seat, work out in front of me, ready to begin immediately. Plus with the work I did today I'm definitely setup to be ahead of the curve still. Now I just have to keep going. This will be doable on my busiest days, which makes me actually pretty glad my first day ever was one of them. Tomorrow will be a good demonstration of seeing what I can really get done with this amount. As much as I hate change, I must be prepared to make more iterations as necessary. Another crucial point of The Slight Edge philosophy. Other than that, classes were fantastic! I'm looking forward to Physics tomorrow, as well as diving deeper into studying. Tomorrow I'll be mostly memorizing Hiragana. Japanese class was fun! Gonna cut it here, need to get my things organized before bed. More solidworks spoils tomorrow, I promise. Things I'm grateful for: 1. Solid first day of classes, despite the minor setback. 2. Seeing more old friends from karate, as well as a fresh class of newbies. That was me a year ago haha. Will be interesting to see who sticks with it. 3. Japanese! Finally digging into the language. Now I just need some samurai armor, and a katana... Arigatoo!

Thank you. So far it's been pretty manageable, but it's good to know that others deal with similar circumastances as well. Will have to add that book to my list haha. EVERYTHING I do is for that ultimate goal >:D

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.28.2016 | Day 57 Damn, I really needed some advice after yesterday haha. Today was busy, but overall very decent. Woke up a little late again, because I went to bed a little late as well. That ends tonight. It's 9:12pm currently; my plan is to knock out this entry, get everything set for tomorrow, and then head to bed before 10:30. I threw away all my work paraphernalia as soon as I returned from my shift; that chapter of my life is officially finished. Switching to student mode. Originally I was going to use words, but I think it's just easier if I show you all my schedule for the semester: SPACE CAPTAIN'S ULTIMATE MASTER PLAN FOR ACADEMIC SUCCESS - Attend every class - Study two hours a day (yes, starting tomorrow) 100% Slight Edge tactics, putting them to work. But hot damn, six pomodoros a day? That's a little overkill don't you think? NO, not overkill! I'm not taking any chances. I want to start out strong and let that momentum carry me through the semester. Hopefully by following this plan I won't have to cram for tests and the like, which I've had to do before. It's completely miserable. The only thing that does make me a little nervous is doing this plus my other daily goals. Pssssh, let's just count all the pomodoros. Six a day for studying, four for daily goals (1 solidworks, 2 reading, 1 novel work), 750 words a day equivalent to one, and this journal entry, which honestly is about two on average. Twelve pomodoros = 240 minutes = four hours. Four hours of work outside of classes! Per day? That's a decent amount actually, especially on Mondays and Wednesdays, if I take into account things like eating haha. I won't count on having as much free time on those days (the schedule also doesn't show the nights I have karate: M/W/F/Sun nights). But I'll focus on prioritizing the two hours studying per day first. Maybe I can make adjustments in the future depending on how things go, but if they conflict with my other goals, so be it. Classes come first. Plus it's really not that bad. The only things I really do for relaxing is either listening to music or watching movies or the occasional youtube video. I also would like to hang out with friends every now and then. My poor friends! Couldn't see them last night or tonight! Oh well, sacrifices folks. I'll have PLENTY of time on Tuesday. My roommate's super smash bros. gathering politely cleared out after I entered. I did need the space and quiet to focus, but I still feel bad. It's just an unfortunate clash of interests I think. I don't know how long they were playing and I hate to be the reason shit gets broken up, but I have to do what's necessary. I just hope they're not secretly pissed off or something. I did promise I'd show you all the awesome work I did in solidworks yesterday. It's a tutorial I did on Rendering and the Photoview360 add in. It's basically a set of tools for getting a sense of how your products would look in the real world. I knew it was integrated somewhere in the program, but I was not prepared for this: No, I didn't make this from scratch, unfortunately. My skills aren't there yet haha. I just messed around with some coloring and material features, learning about how solidworks manages different layers and styles within your design (which is pretty confusing actually, since there's a hierarchy between the part, component, and assembly levels). But once you turn on Photoview, it basically throws in realistic lighting, shadows, and reflections based on the materials and background, which are fully customizable! Check out this final render: My jaw dropped when I saw this work of art. It's so pretty! I wonder if they actually sell this haha. It looks even better on the actual screen. And this is with it's infamous Realview settings turned off, since the graphics card on the computers doesn't support it. Today I worked on an advanced design tutorial, making some sort of edit flexible door hinge using equations. Super exciting stuff. I'm contemplating adding more practice time everyday. Goals for Tomorrow: 1. Studying, 6 pomodoros 2. 750 words. I'm also going to sign up for the One Month September Challenge. 3. Solidworks, 1 pomodoro 4. Think and Grow Rich, 1 pomodoro 5. A Brief History of Time, 1 pomodoro 6. Novel work, 1 pomodoro 7. Pick up bupropion refill. I missed a day because I forgot! MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Studying, 6 pomodoros Things I'm grateful for: 1. No more work, but two more paychecks! 2. GAMETIME! (The study kind, not the actual game kind) 3. Having more fun with solidworks lately.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.27.2016 | Day 56 Starting this one late as well, so I have to keep it short. Even though I feel as if I could write for an hour. College is almost in full swing. Work was busy today with all the check-ins, and there are so many people on campus now. It's almost disorienting. I've completely adjusted to the lack of people during the summer, and now I have to readjust. So much noise too! It's like I forgot how college life is. Walked to my dorm room to find my new roommate playing super smash brothers on a 40 inch tv with a friend. First encounter literally. Oh dear. Relax, it's not that serious. Two more friends join him. Okay, I'll just step out for a little bit. He said it's no problem if I needed them to leave, which made me feel better. Will need to see how things play out over the next couple weeks. I mustn't be afraid to be up front and communicate clearly about my wishes. I respect his hobbies, but I also need some quiet time every now and then. Maybe we can work out a schedule or something, if push comes to shove. Otherwise still going strong with goals. Must keep the momentum going forward, especially with all the changes that are still to come. I was so into my solidworks session I almost missed dinner at the dining halls haha. Once work ends I shouldn't be as strapped for time. Solidworks pics tomorrow, I promise. I have something AMAZING to show you all, but no time tonight. Sorry! Shit. I only did one To-Do list task today instead of two...I forgot that one. Now I'm sad. I need to get more organized. Goals for Tomorrow: 1. 750 words freewriting 2. Solidworks Lab, 1 pomodoro 3. Novel Work, 1 pomodoro 4. Think and Grow Rich, 1 pomodoro 5. A Brief History of Time, 1 pomodoro 6. Devote a full hour tomorrow night before bed to journaling and planning for the big day. MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Solidworks, 1 pomodoro Things I'm grateful for: 1. Only one day of work left, then it's gametime! 2. Getting to text some of my friends who are coming back. Unfotunately I can't hang out with them tonight, but there will be other opportunities. 3. A respectful roommate with respectful friends. I will do my best to act in kind.

This is the exact same shit I'm currently dealing with. You are not alone. Oh, and we're both captains btw

Will do! Thank you.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.26.2016 | Day 55 Another day, another dollar. Everything feels streamlined now, to be honest. Same goals, every day. Had no issue waking up at 5am to get to work, probably because I got to bed early enough. Was still a little tired during the day, but it didn't really matter. Just sat there for eight hours, getting my stuff done and hanging out. Took a look at Coach.me, an app Cam recommended in one of his latest videos. It looks very polished, but I think it's pretty redundant when I have this as well. Perhaps it might be good though to see that extra visual progress. I'll try it out for a coule days at least. Started Think and Grow Rich today. Man, what an intense read. I have never read anything like this before. It's very similar to The Slight Edge, concepts with stories meshed in. But TGR is just...it's like a firehose. It just doesn't stop. I had a lot of extra time today to really dive in, but I may need to slow down or reread some parts in the future. Intense. Love being able to swipe into the engineering lab even if the door is locked. I feel like a VIP. Karate was intense as always, but good. I need to work on my breathing, was feeling lightheaded after we started doing kata. A lot of times I feel oxygen-deprived while performing them, like when I'm trying to breathe in the middle of movements but the movements themselves are constricting my lungs or something. And then I'm trying to catch my breath using those stomach-breathing techniques, and it feels like my brain is swelling up with each inhale. Don't know if that's good or bad. My guess is it's bad. Maybe I'm just too tense still. That's been a big issue for me, ever since I started training. I've made progress over the last year, but I still get corrected by my sensei at least once per class. I also need to stretch more too. I have some issues with joints in my legs and feet, probably as a result of me being born flat-footed, and my hips aren't flexible at all. I used to go to class super early to setup and then stretch but I haven't lately, mainly because it takes an additional hour out of my day. I don't know. My main priority right now is just making sure I'm going to every class, which so far I am doing. One of the black belts commended me on my kata after class; he said it looked strong. Made me feel pretty good, although there was still that slight tinge of anxiety afterwards. I want and fear success simlutaneously. It drives me nuts. Haven't posted any solidworks for a while, so here's one. It's an assembly of a few parts I put together to form a mill machine. Here you can see me dragging the top table around, playing with the lock/unlock controls. A lot of work went into organizing and inputting all the mates to the different pieces, but this post is long enough haha. If anybody wants to know more feel free to ask. I can better cement my learning by explaining to others. Not by default though, not too much. Goals for Tomorrow: 1. 750 words freewriting 2. Solidworks Lab, 1 pomodoro 3. Novel Work, 1 pomodoro 4. Think and Grow Rich, 1 pomodoro 5. A Brief History of Time, 1 pomodoro 6. Complete two tasks from To-Do List MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Solidworks, 1 pomodoro Things I'm grateful for: 1. Getting paid to read books and watch movies. 2. Seeing a karate friend at practice today after 3 months. She took the whole summer off lol, but she still looks good. I probably wouldn't have. 3. Getting closer to classes. Wanna just get started already. @Reno F just saw your post in the middle of writing this. It's called 750words.com. I actually got the idea from another journal on here, don't remember whose it was. I'd try to figure out who, but it's getting late. If you want to work on fiction writing (I know you mentioned joining a roleplay earlier) I would also recommend checking out http://bubblecow.com/guides/1 . You can make a free account and get a nice e-book called The Writer's Manual. It's actually pretty legit. I definitely plan on reading through that once I start more of the actual writing portion of my novel. Need to sleep now. Thank you everyone!

Just bought my Japanese textbook yesterday. Super hyped!

That moment when you realize what you thought you knew about something was only the surface How our Sun produces energy: Fusion of hydrogen atoms into helium, right? Easy. How our Sun ACTUALLY produces energy: A proton-proton chain reaction involving two isotopes of hydrogen and two of helium. Hydrogen has isotopes??????? Novel research is much more intensive than I thought it would be. Good thing I know The Slight Edge.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.25.2016 | Day 54 Have to keep this one really short. Completed all my goals again; it's pretty much clockwork at this point. I just have to make sure I'm maintaining them once the semester starts, and add my two hour a day study block. That's the plan for now. Next three days it's just going to be mainly working, and karate. But at least my area shouldn't be too busy so I expect I'll have ample time to get my goals completed for these days. Then I'm just a regular college student! Fun stuff. Goals for Tomorrow: 1. 750 words freewriting 2. Solidworks Lab, 1 pomodoro 3. Novel Work, 1 pomodoro 4. Think and Grow Rich, 1 pomodoro (Yay! New book!) 5. A Brief History of Time, 1 pomodoro MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Solidworks, 1 pomodoro Things I'm grateful for: 1. Getting that Japanese class. 2. Finding a good barber on campus. 3. Not hacking myself to pieces shaving for the first time today.

LUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So jelly right now.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.24.2016 | Day 53 Well today was...as predicted. Just finished my last pomodoros for the day, as a result of again some poor decisions I made after work. Something that should have only taken me about 20 minutes at the most I dragged on for two hours, because I just wasn't thinking properly. Now I'm losing sleep because of it. Sigh. I'm really enjoying writing on that 750 words site. It's been amazing just being able to put all of my thoughts somewhere, even though I'm not sure if it's actually giving me any mental benefits, other than just dealing with some shoved away uncomfortable thoughts. I'll probably end up signing up for the One Month September Challenge. Speaking of September, news is Elon Musk is planning on revealing his plan for getting humans to Mars at the 67th International Astronautical Congress in Mexico, on September 27th. Man, that's four days before my detox ends. Super exciting stuff. I've been eager to learn more about MCT since I first heard of it (if anyone here knows what that is we are automatically best friends). Hopefully it's livestreamed. So apparently I'm going to be acting supervisor for work this opening weekend, in the area I was assigned. It wasn't a promotion haha, there just wasn't one placed in that area, so they're having me do it. Shouldn't be anything too crazy. Training is tomorrow, and then we just have to arrive ready to go Friday at 6:30 in the morning! GG sleep schedule. I'm seeing way more people on campus now that early arrivals are ending. It's almost shocking; I've actually gotten used to the lack of students during the summer, so it's going to take some time to readjust to the fact that 12,000 people live on campus... Guess that's it for tonight. Goals for Tomorrow: 1. 750 words freewriting 2. Solidworks Lab, 1 pomodoro 3. Novel Work, 1 pomodoro 4. The Slight Edge, 1 pomodoro (I finished it but want to take another day to fill in those goal blanks) 5. A Brief History of Time, 1 pomodoro MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Solidworks, 1 pomodoro I also plan on getting school supplies and possibly getting a haircut. Which is going to be dramatic because right now I have an afro. I'm also thinking about shaving...I'm not a hobo I swear. Things I'm grateful for: 1. No more early arrival check-ins. Today was my busiest workday of the summer. 2. Still going strong with daily goals. 3. Unrestricted solidworks access. The more I use it the more I realize just how powerful of a program I have. (had a brief look today at its database of common machine parts available for insert, organized by country...)

Great title name! I'm glad you have so many goals as well. Best of luck.

@JSmith props for the self awareness and openness. As long as you have the desire, you will get past that mentality one day. Dunno if you've read this, excerpt from "Bounce", Matthew Syed. Experiment with some young students and math performance. The control group that performed better were not smarter on average, they simply tried harder/longer and didn't give up. In the under performing group, they were praised at how "talented" or "genius" they were. In the well performing group they told them "you must have worked so hard to do so well". Your fears aren't out of nowhere, it's easy for others to undervalue effort and just talk about talent/genius because that makes it easier to not try. It sounds like you've been surrounded by that mentality a lot. But looking at your progress I feel like you're well on your way to where you'll define your success, keep it up! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0s-pAC9Dq88 - here's a minute of Gary V that hopefully helps Thank you for the kind words! I'll have to take another look at that video tomorrow.

Captain's Log - JSmith | 8.23.2016 | Day 52 I've been slacking a little bit on getting these out every night, it's important that I stay consistent. Just got back from work and I'm pretty tired; I don't even remember exactly what I did yesterday, oh wait it's coming back to me. Worked in the morning while also scrambling to get all my goals done, which eventually I did. I realized today why I tended to get frustrated while at work. It's because of the damn goals haha. Today I managed to get everything done before my work shift, and I was much happier overall during, since the pressure was off. Which is kind of obvious isn't it? Unfortunately I won't have much luck tomorrow. Apparently 700 people are checking in tomorrow, so I don't intend to get anything else done during my day shift. That leaves me with about three and a half hours afterwards to get my goals done before karate. Well, if I don't screw around it shouldn't be too difficult. I just hope I'm not drained after working. Wrote over 2000 words today in my online journal. Oh my god, I can't focus right now. It sounds like somebody is doing jumping jacks in the goddamn hallway. I'm too tired for this. It's coming from the RA's room. Go figure. That was so freaking weird. I hear noises in there like people are talking. I knock on the door, and then suddenly it gets all quiet and I hear whispering, but nobody answers. And then just as I'm about to give up and go back I see one guy walk out with headphones, not for me. He apologized, saying he was just knocking stuff over. Huh????? I don't understand...but at least the noises stopped. At least he was nice. I tend to assume the worst in people. Really bad habit, I know. I'm so sorry, I should sleep now. Oh, the journal. I was just reminiscing about some old roleplays I did a year back. I've been daydreaming about them a lot recently...I just miss them I guess. But then again, I've always missed them. It's an odd topic, I'll only say more if anyone asks. Every person I see on this site, writing about their wives and girlfriends and dates, I envy you. Don't let them go. Goals for Tomorrow: I've been doing the same stuff every day for a couple weeks now, do I really need to write it down? LOL copy/paste dude. I forgot. 1. 750 words freewriting 2. Solidworks Lab, 1 pomodoro 3. Novel Work, 1 pomodoro 4. The Slight Edge, 1 pomodoro (I finished it but want to take another day to fill in those goal blanks) 5. A Brief History of Time, 1 pomodoro 6. Attend karate class. MOST IMPORTANT TASK: Solidworks, 1 pomodoro No more captain's stats, at least for now. How am I going to enjoy the journey if I'm too busy tracking the numbers? Things I'm grateful for: 1. Easygoing day at work. I think I've officially run out of days like these, but it was nice while it lasted. 2. One of my karate friends working with me today. We always have such interesting conversations. 3. Finally getting my card access fixed for the ME lab. Now I can do solidworks pretty much whenever. Stay awesome folks.

That's a great attitude! I believe in you. I've thought about setting up a blog in the past as well, but I'm not sure what I would write about haha.