Ikar

What a long post full of interesting ideas. You should get a blog up as I have. Back before when I was at the military uni (some 3 years ago), I was reasonably productive when I was living at the dormitory with others, but I slipped into doing nothing all day when I was coming home for the weekends, because that's how I learnt to live throughout high school. There's a ton of it and I like to research this area. I am going to get around posting a blog article about relationships eventually, so I am sure some of it will resurface there.

It's "Taktika a strategie v lásce" by Miroslav Plzák, so I am afraid you have to start learning Czech 🙂

Thanks! The same goes to you from me 🙂 Day 353: I wrote, read, had a call about suggestions for my IG, went for a business meeting, visited my grandma, did a bit of Forex, exercised a bit and played chess in the evening.

I'm currently reading a book about this. It says something along the lines that attractive (for women it is initially more focused on their physical appearance, for men it is more about how competent they seem in what they do) people tend to be more promiscuous than unattractive ones who cling to loyalty/single partner out of fear of having to find someone and going through the ordeal again. The good news is that these two categories are not necessarily given for life. I think historically game addicts (averagely young males) are planted firmly into the unattractive category, so it makes sense for them/formerly us to proclaim "loyalty at all costs/ONSs are horrible". But I am beginning to see the point of having more options. Having the option to have an ONS, but also knowing that there is something greater than that. I wonder that perhaps you needed just that experience to realize that. I think the golden middle-ground here is "loyalty - AND hard earned". And that starts with the individual. Do you want a girl that exercises regularly and keeps in shape? Make sure you exercise regularly and keep yourself in shape. Be someone you would like to date and don't sell yourself short. Peterson's great. His words at the beginning helped me to get where I am at now.

I mean, except for discovering my ex about two years ago, I can't say I got much further than you myself, at least in the past year. I believe this is what keeps me going on the dating apps. I think I have the dynamics of it figured out, even if I can't take advantage of them under quarantine. I think the main one is to be selected rather than to select. Overall, it's just a matter of time before I start going out on dates regularly.

Day 350: I visited my parents, read, took a walk and did some minor maintenance in my room. Day 351: I had a call with my friend regarding our plans for Forex. I read, took a walk, played football and had a party in the evening. Day 352: I did a bit of Forex, went for a walk, read, took a nap and wrote.

I'm using the template I used the last time. 7/3/20 - 6/4/20 "L" will stand for the (last) plan for this term. "T" will stand for done this term. "N" will stand for the plan next term. Books: L: I got "The Red and the Black" from Stendhal and "Beyond Good and Evil" by Nietzsche. T: I finished "The Red and the Black" from Stendhal. I am currently reading "Tactic and Strategy in Love". It describes all the common types of intimate relationships and I find it practical, helpful and truthful. N: Finish "Tactic and Strategy in Love" and start reading "Rich Dad Poor Dad" by Kiyosaki. English - Personal + Business: L: I think I want to bond my personal progression together with my business progression. The idea I would study some obscure English grammar or did tests on the Internet just seems foreign to me. I'll just keep on doing what I've been doing up until now. I'm gonna get my webpage up by mid-March. Word. It's already 50% done anyway. I am also going to spam more mails, even though I think everybody knows that I exist in this area at this point. T: Sadly, all the English social gatherings that I could attend got cancelled and the courses got either cancelled or delayed as well. I got the website up and running, as well as my business cards and banners. N: I have an interview coming up and a plan to cooperate with one of my friends in the business during the summer. Family: L: I think it's true to say that I find my family members more dear when I am more detached from them by living on the dorms. I get to see them just enough to be caught up on what are they up to. I think it works that way for most relationships, except for when people live together. T: Business as usual. I don't think anyone is freaking out. N: Maintain the relationships as they are, I'm happy with them as they are. University: L: Stick to doing assignments ahead of time. There's one bigger one coming up. Otherwise it's fairly smooth sailing during the semester. T: There's been a few webinars I attended, but so far there is just one big assignment due in a month. N: I'll try not to be stupid and get it done in a week or two, so I won't have to worry about it. Being social: L: I am creating more connections and deepening current ones. I like the consistency of that. I can still be a bit sheepish at times though. I like to both talk to others and watch them. I'm vigilant. T: I think while my time spent being social took a hit, it wasn't as big as I expected it to be. I just meet people in smaller groups and play desktops. N: Hard to say, given the current circumstances. Exercise/movement: L: I did the same pull-up, sit-up and bike routine all month. I'm gonna get into some mobility workout too, because I would like to be more flexible and less prone to injury. I put in some more exercises to mix up my workouts, as well as some stretching. I think I want to make my workouts even more diverse. T: I exercise in my room now, though for lesser periods of time than before, but I also take walks into the nature more. I try to get both in during the day. N: Hard to say, given the current circumstances. Russian/German: I am still on track on Duolingo (204 days streak). Forex: T: A friend got me into trading currencies online two weeks ago and on average, I've been able to spend an hour a day on checking this out. I got the basics of it and so far I fare well on the demo account. I also like the intertwining of it with personal development. N: I wrote my friend that I am willing to put some 10 hours a week into educating myself on the topic and I'm confident I can manage that. He wrote he is going to help me out hone my IG if I am going to delve into marketing later on. Women/dating: L: I'm currently talking to a few women. I get myself out there on a regular basis. I'm finding out what I like and what I do not like. It could be that I am still perhaps too rational and shy about this, but I am getting better. It's like entering the swimming pool with a descent. I feel more comfortable initiating conversations with men overall. Be cool with whatever the outcome is. That's how I learn. T: I am on the dating apps, but I'd prefer just normally going out to meet women. I will probably keep them around after the quarantine is over as passive scanners. I think I have this game and trends figured out. N: Be cool with whatever the outcome is. That's how I learn. Projects/misc finished last month: business - got the materials website (100%) Projects/misc upcoming this month: money - forex gun license - on hold, quarantine get GIS done - university Thoughts, ideas and additional comments/gratitude:

I think the beauty of the relationship is that you can't really know yourself in that regard up until you actually are in the relationship. Even if you unknowingly only wanted to have sex in the relationship, it beats having multiple sexual partners at the same time in the long run. It depends on your experience on how much are you going to get swayed by human instincts that are juxtaposed to the rationale. I also think that if the woman you're going to have is as happy as you are about getting into the relationship together, you're going to get what you need for the future and she will become your best friend.

The issue with the all-out lifestyle focused just on one thing is that once that thing goes away, the chance that it's going to drastically change your current lifestyle is very high. In that case, it doesn't even matter if it's something we love or hate. Going to work or to school or gaming for some 30-50 hours a week is quite an investment of time and identity. More than a year ago, I think about 90% of my identity could've been defined by my relationship with my ex and gaming. I think nowadays there isn't a single thing that I do that would define me from more than 20% or that I would consistently invest 20% of my waking hours into. I don't think I even want to though, I like how diversified my personality is nowadays. One of the things I miss is that borderline insane relentlessness to just finish a secondary task and go back to the primary one (gaming) immediately without delay. I think we have to give ourselves credit for what we do though. In my case, I wouldn't say I am "average", I just do a bunch of different things and I wouldn't know which one to start writing about 😄 As for things I like doing, I found out life has mysterious ways in getting me into them regardless. I can't reason myself into doing something new, it's intuitive for me. Either by randomly pondering about it for a couple of times or as a logical continuation of what I'm doing at the moment already.

Before it's about "right or wrong", it's about "compulsory or voluntary". We can quit gaming altogether and survive. But we can't quit eating, drinking or breathing altogether and survive. I like to put sexuality there as well, but notice I didn't write "masturbation" per se; I think there are ways to express that energy other than masturbation itself, but I don't think it can be completely replaced.

Day 348: I worked out, read, took a walk, did Duolingo and visited my friend. I helped him sort out some stuff in his flat and I took some of it he no longer needed. Day 349: We finished the cleaning process, I cycled back and played desktops in the evening. --- Since I had a few sleepovers in the past week, it made me realize that it's important to cultivate the ability to be "alone" together, even if the person is visible to you literally the whole day. I think it's a successful cornerstone of any long-term relationship where people share their quarters.

I think the idea here is that sexual release is indispensable and the only real question here is how I want to do it, not if I want to do it. It's the same with eating or drinking. Not drinking anything is bad. Drinking two liters of soda is fine. Drinking two liters of water is even better. I'd argue there is not a lot of these basic categories that everyone needs to get done, but they are extremely hard to set straight once they somehow got "contaminated". I believe some people might enjoy it, but it's hard to be realistic with goal setting, check-boxes and whatnot. Perhaps I can get my daily tasks done in 4 hours and feel miserable, but I can also get them done in 6 hours and feel great that I took them on slower. I think it's more important to watch the whole "vision" or big picture of my life. Some goals might even have a random factor thrown in. I can work out every day for the next year, if I really want to. Whether I can find a girlfriend or make a million dollars is not that 100% anymore, but it's generally better to still put some efforts towards these goals and to search for opportunities. While I do have a schedule, I mostly write there what I did rather than what I plan to do. I also prefer slower starts to my days, picking up the pace during the afternoon.

I made backups of my diary on my desktop. I also already compare the months to each other 🙂

Day 347: I got up normally and got a few minor things done, but then I decided to take a nap for a few hours. I took a walk then and did the groceries after a few days, so I am stocked. After that, I chatted with people on the Internet and did some trades on my Forex demo account. I started reading a Czech book that could translate as "Tactics and Strategies in Love". I enjoy it quite a bit so far. I had a light workout in the evening and went to play chess and chat.

I'm gonna get it done in a few days.

Day 346: I did Duolingo, got the laundry from my clotheshorse, did some light editing of my website, watched one video about mindset and one about Forex basics, wrote here, took a walk, exercised, put my banner onto the bars of my dorm window and did some chatting on IG/dating apps. I think I get a lot of work done these days, even though I sometimes fall into states of mindless autopilot and catch myself doing something inefficiently later on. I woke up a few times at night the past days too, but I am happy I get my daily tasks done. Work hard and play hard.

Day 345: I visited my grandma and my brother after not seeing them for two weeks. It was good to see both of them again. I had a good chat with my grandma and my brother proofread my website and I considered some of his suggestions. I had a light workout (50 pushups and 50 situps) and I attended a uni webinar.

I actually wrote the outline for this reply some 10 hours ago, but I wanted some more input before writing more. I think Glover put it wonderfully by writing something in the lines of this: "A woman needs to know that you are willing to stand up AGAINST her, so that there is at least a chance that you might stand up FOR her in the future." Glad to hear all is good in the hood now 🙂

I wonder if you could correlate that with the success of the members' individual detoxes 😄 Blaming and excuses never get us anywhere.

Day 344: Maintenance day. I did Duolingo, finished "The Red and the Black", cooked a chicken, went for a walk, set up whatever few events for the next week, washed the dishes, cleaned my room, exercised and did the laundry. "The Red and the Black" is an interesting and instructive book. There's ambition, love and psychological warfare.

Hold the line and try to relax. If she wants to be pissed off because she broke a promise, let her. If you back down and she finds out she can push you around (in more serious matters than borrowing a bike), she'll lose respect for you. I've been there and done that. I even witnessed one such fight in the past several days. It's about the principle. I wouldn't expect that the first thing she does when exiting the "psychological warfare" mode is going to be an apology, but you know her better than I do. A funny piece of trivia is that the divorce rate in China spiked after the quarantines ended, because people found out they can't be in one place for extended periods of time. It's impossible to "be together" and "do something together" for days on end without a break. This situation is perfect for determining whether your house rules are in order or not.

It depends on each person's individual risk management and circumstances. Getting out there for those two days was both objectively useful and subjectively fun. I obey the law as it is currently in effect (i.e. I do not throw underground parties), so I meet with smaller groups of people and less often than before. One thing I keep in mind is that most of us are probably going to get it, even if in a way that our immune system handles it no problem. We're going to be fine 🙂

Day 342: I did a bit of Forex, read, did Duolingo and then cycled to my friend who lives some 15 kilometers away. We mostly chilled, talked to each other and took a walk in the forest. I was a bit peeved, because he spent a lot of time on his phone chatting with his girlfriend, but he noticed that and he told me that I have a bad luck of coming to visit him when he's having more a intense period (pun intended) with her. He seems to be stalwart and knowing what he's doing though. We agreed that there needs to be a degree of discipline in relationships that needs to be upheld. I think things would've gone very differently for me if I knew that two years ago. Day 343: I slept over at my friend's. Afterwards, he drove me to pick up my car from the paint shop. It definitely looks better now. I then helped my dad to bring a new TV to my parents' house. Afterwards, I drove to pick up my business cards, banners and then drove to my parents' to visit them after two weeks. It was nice to see them again. I also managed to sell my old bike today. I got home in the evening, had a webinar about geographic information systems and I just chilled for the rest of the day.

Great! I got myself to ejaculate weekly. It also helps that you'll re-adjust to normal-world women around you as porn fades away from your mind. I'd say just do it. I don't even know how would I "practice" writing myself. I just write and if somebody doesn't like it, I'm happy my writing caught their attention for a while. At the moment, I probably write on the GQ forums the most.

I found out that after a week of initial re-adjustment in the quarantine, it helped me to get up at 6:30 with no issues, perhaps because I hardly have any meetings in the evening nowadays. The current situation is actually pretty good in forging new habits and detecting disfunctional ones.