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Raven

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Everything posted by Raven

  1. Day 39 no gaming. Feeling good. I do exercise, one of my many new goals is to progress in calisthenics. Games feel so stupid now. I wonder how I got so invested into them. One of my friends keeps telling me about his big gaming "achievements" Like spending 149 bucks on the new cod and getting 7 wins in a row on league of legends. I look now and think. Wow, thats sad man. I think he doesn't like me quitting because I shine a light on him that shows him he has a problem
  2. Hey that sucks. Do you have any goals beside not gaming for the next few months? If your days feel long and boring thinking about stuff you want to do and actually doing some of them on a daily basis can help a lot. Not too many goals no. Other than hopefully getting out of my house if the meds can help me with it. Don't think they have kicked in yet
  3. Day 28- Almost a month. Depressed and tired most of the day. Days feel long and boring. Hoping things get better.
  4. Depressed today. Really bored these days not a lot of motivation. Going to try meditation again using a different app called Abide. Science really shows how powerful meditation is. I know it is not a quick fix but I am praying that it helps alleviate the seemingly endless suffering of my current situation. Day 21 today
  5. Day 20- My friend is always bringing up league topics with me, I know what he is trying to do. Get me to play again. I just answer the best I can and move on. I find it not triggering at all. Kind of sad really. That he gets caught up in that fantasy world of make-believe. Yes, the grind is a struggle but it is a blessing in disguise as it will make me stronger. I calculated all the time I wasted on games over the years. Minus the Xbox and the World of Warcraft. Which I do not have data on. But from my steam totals and league totals, I racked up 1054 hours. That scares me big time. That is a lot!
  6. Day 18- Decent day. Kindof boring. Just doing my activities at home. Went for a small walk afterwards but didn't go far
  7. Makes sense man. Its a journey not a race to the destination. I don't want to miss the beautiful scenery along the way. Today has been alright. Semi-productive but a bit tired. Gotta focus on my tasks on my job board. Got the idea from one of the GQ podcasts. Also, I use habitica and have been using that since February and I love it!
  8. Day 16. Finally braved the full dose of my Celexa today. As usual nothing exciting happened it was all anticipation. My grandparents came over for a visit and that made me feel really great the rest of the day.
  9. Thank you for the reply. I am enjoying the day today and yes I am proud of my 2 weeks sober. When did the withdrawal start to lift for you? Cam says around 3 weeks is that accurate?
  10. Hard times today. All day alone and scared. Bad thoughts and suicidal thoughts when depression becomes strong. Sometimes I feel like I can't break free from my mental illness. I feel stuck at home. It has been two years. I am going to go t o my supposed to be dose of Celexa asap. I am on a subtherapeutic dose right now so what do I have to lose? Just scared about side effects but it cant be worse than the depression itself. Just ha d to vent. I am getting more nights like this since winter is approaching and I feel even more trapped
  11. Raven

    Anxiety

    Giblets made some good points, I also struggle with anxiety and panic attacks and I know personally that when I fight the feelings they get a lot worse. Hope you are doing ok Simms. Do you keep a journal?
  12. Day 13 a bit tired today but the sun is out so I am enjoying that. Going to win the day and be productive. Haven't even thought of games during this time which is good. The mood is a bit on the lower side but that is because I am dreading the task of exposure therapy. I might do light work today. We will see. Overall I am enjoying the change that game free living is providing me. My poor brain must have been so fried
  13. 12 days game free. Had a great Thanksgiving. People make me feel normal even though I have agoraphobia. They never press the issue and I can have a couple of days without worry. Now back to the grind. And exposure therapy. Still feeling a bit sick but going to finish my workout today.
  14. Thank you for the support! Bit by bit goes a long way! Yes sir!
  15. Day 9 Bit of a head cold today. Couldn't do too many things today. Still managed to workout and clean the house up so that is good.
  16. OK so apparently I got my days mixed up. TODAY is day 7. Today I have been productive. Made my yard look real nice, also deleted my steam games! Boo Ya! The weight has been lifted folks.
  17. I had that problem too. Me and my friend would search for the perfect game. Then play it, it wouldn't be so perfect anymore. My prayers go out to you on your journey !
  18. @Cam Adair Do you recommended your respawn book but just the basic? I don't make income but my birthday is coming up and I would love to get the full package but will the book do for now?
  19. No I do not. I got scared about it because I heard it can bring what is called the dark night or something. Make depression and anxiety worse. Maybe I overblown the article but that is my anxiety talking Yes, this happens, and it's a major part of your growth opportunity. No need to run from them anymore, just feel them fully and let them pass. I was watching this video when I saw this lol. I can relate to your story to a T
  20. Day 7. Rough day with a rough start, weird dreams freaked me out this morning and I have had high anxiety all day. Gonna start using afformations and I also am starting my new workout routine as my old one isn't working for me. Really hoping the AD kicks in soon because I am suffering. But pain brings strength and I think quitting gaming has forced me to experience emotions fully.
  21. Day 3 today. Had a rough night last night due to fears from my family about my illness. This week has been tough as I got scared by suicidal thoughts popping into my head and dark depression. I think quitting gaming ripped the neuro chemical bandaid off my wound and now the pain is letting itself out. All speculation of course I am conserned over my friend who has anger issues and talked about going on a shooting spree. I think it is a cry for help I hope his girlfriend can help him out as I don't know what to say. I can't prove he will do it but if I have concerns I will have to tell him. Withdrawals are boredom and depression. Agroraphobia and staying in your house is super boring. At least my sister is here but she is also very boring to be around as she is addicted to social media, binge eating, and television! Danm these unactive people.
  22. Jordan B Peterson podcast. Listen once and your hooked! And Sleep with me podcast is awesome for bedtime!
  23. Yeah I will test it. How do I get it? Is it like a daily exercise or?
  24. In theory I would think night is the best to go over the day. But I agree with Andre2907 so many excuses as well. Whenever is the stock answer. There is no best time whenever feels good
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