Tom

?Heh, what a stupid idea. That's what I thought. In my experience that's a clear marker that there's something for me to learn. In my mind I always judge stuff as it works/it doesn't work for me, I like/dislike it, and so on, because I believe you can only judge people or ideas in relation to your own mental schemes. So whenever I feel contempt I know that the way I see the world is being challenged. And that's my favorite way to grow, so I wrote my first letter right away and voila, it was not your idea that was stupid. It was my prejudice. Makes sense?

Great that you are enjoying your recess! That's a tricky one, so first things first. Start from being aware of your mind. Don't fret about negative thoughts and emotions, chase them to the root instead. What do they tell you about yourself? Is their cause something you can change? Do it. Is it something you can't control? Double-check. If true, make peace with that. Keep exercising, meditating, eating and drinking well. Your body complaining of being mistreated is a major cause of a negative mindset. Hormones drive us around. Choose your company well. More time with people who inspire you, less with those who drain you. Vampires will always find another prey so don't worry about them. Be there for your friends and family in need of a shoulder to cry on but never forget that you can't save other people. Don't take responsibility for the pain you don't cause. Be kind. Remember that everybody is going through their own personal struggles, yourself included. What can you do to brighten their day just a little bit? So maybe you can try this: do a random act of kindness every day. You'll be surprised. Hope this helps

Nice! Keep up the good work! ?Some billion people will tell you yes, other billion people think otherwise. It's quite subjective. Definitely not an easy book: consider how ancient it is, the effort that went into its recollection and translation, the way it's written and structured. People who want to read it effectively usually go through years of theology. If you are hungry for spiritual reads I can't suggest Kahlil Gibran enough. His best-known work is called The Prophet.

Day 11. Woke up still tired. Somehow I managed to have my children tidy up their toys. I played a bit with them, tidied up here and there, played some music. I read a book on social skills suggested by Travis. I called my grandmother and had a nice long conversation. It will be good to see her for Christmas along with all the other relatives. Went out to buy groceries, came back and summoned my family to help me out with our weekend family tradition of making homemade pizza. Did everything to be in bed early. Gratitude journal: VoIP. Skype and the like are a boon to expats. Especially with dirt-cheap calling plans.eReaders. I can make the text as big as I want.My grandmother still being alive and well. There's a reason we call her Highlander.

Day 10. I slept poorly and woke up exhausted. Well, I'm not new to weekend exhaustion but I thought it wouldn't have hit this time. I tried to make the best of my day, spent time with my family, retreated when I was having too much. Still, everything felt like a chore and I couldn't wait for my kids to fall asleep and the decibel level to go down. Highlight of the day: talking with my mom for over an hour.

Day 9. A good day. Great dreams, one game related and a bit scary but just until the point I figured out it was a dream and changed it. The highlight of the day was the evening. I attended the local TEDx event with the aim of getting to know interesting people and experiencing how I fit in with the group. The evening's topic was willpower. Interesting format: around 20 attendees, a presentation including three other talks, and room for discussion. I had some good conversations with four people, one of them a previous acquaintance I was very pleased to meed again. I found it to be a healthy, stimulating environment with people of any age, nationality and background. I plan on becoming a regular. When leaving I had a chat with one of the organizers. He invited me to be the curator for November's content. That was unexpected! I accepted gladly. Now let's kick some ass!

Hi Trevor! Thanks for joining. I can relate to a lot of what you say. It's nice that you are able to recognize and tame your urges. Well put!

?Glad you're doing fine! What gets me up in the morning is what in the past made me stay up late: the need for quiet time to focus on myself. How I use my morning time now is to write my dreams down before waking my children. Motivation comes from knowing that the more accurate and consistent I am, the better my dream recall becomes. Consequently I am more aware I'm dreaming and I have lots of fun. Time ago it was entering the gym first so that I could get hold of the squat rack, which is essential for my training routine. Note that I'm using an alarm app called I can't wake up! which requires one to do something specific to turn it off. I set it up so that I must scan a barcode I put high in a bookshelf in our living room. So technically that's what gets me up

You too hang in there Have you tried decaf? At home we usually mix regular coffee and decaf to get kind of the best of both worlds. The Martian sounds just like my type of movie. Added to my wishlist.

?You can experiment with shaking hands. With whom do you feel like shaking hands? Why? What does the shake tell you? Plus you'll practice a fundamental business skill

Glad you are feeling that way! I love to use my whiteboard. Four markers for a bit of color and magnets to stick papers and pictures.

Nice, only two days two go until Saturday! And you are already writing a journal. If you care about getting your dreams back, that's something I'm doing too. Every morning as soon as I wake up I write my dreams down. It helps to remember and you get better every time. I use the dream journal on Lucidipedia. Have fun tomorrow!

Day 8. A long, convoluted dream and a shorted one. Both quite clear. Just a minimal reference to gaming, if any (might be I expected it and fabricated a false memory). That's good! I'm gaining my nights back. 32% of my life. So, dream journal, then morning family time. Is it just my impression or everybody is in a better mood since a week or so? For sure at least I am. I even look forward to waking up because I start enjoying the day right away. My elder son came by to say hello after school. I invited him in and we talked for a while. I like taking breaks this way. They leave a feeling of connection that lasts for hours at least. With any game I was never satisfied. Five more minutes! Now I just want to spend some time here on the forum before going to bed. I care about the people here. I never felt this way for an online community. In fact I'm quite averse to social media, and yet here I am, wishing that everybody feels alright. Compassion, that's the word.

I am speechless, and deeply moved. Thank you.

Nice one Thomas Day 7. Woke up early again. Strange, although I had the second fragmented night in a row (the l"terrible twos" are a thing) I felt pretty good throughout the day. No dreams I could recall clearly though, just some flashes, which I dutifully noted. On second thought: of course I felt pretty good. Not even a sleepless night could have done too much damage. And it's thanks to some new posts here that shook me deeply and finally got me to talk. Yesterday evening, after I was down with my journal, I went to bed and my wife was still awake. I had mentioned GameQuitters and the fact I have quit gaming before, but we never had a conversation about that. I explained what I'm doing and why. She was attentive, engaged. She always welcomes when I open up, which is not something I do frequently. She would never have imagined my feelings towards gaming. To her eyes it was just an innocuous way to spend my time, a hobby. It was hard for me to find the right words and to overcome the feeling of shame when explaining that gaming was in fact everything I thought about most of the time. The feeling of being deprived of something fundamental when I had to be with her and the children instead of gaming. I also talked very concretely. You see, that day I told you I had much to think about, I looked into what makes me happy and what makes me unhappy. What energizes me and what drains me. What I do and what I want to do. This is what I came up with. That's why I chatted up that mom in the park, and now there's a new friendship blooming between our families. That's why when you are at home and I want a break from work I come to you. And so on and so forth. She told me everything sounds strange to her. In fact I've always fulfilled my duties and I strive to be a good husband and father (what would be the point of being one otherwise...). And I understand her: I did a great job at planning my life around gaming! High five! Also my tinfoil hat prevents anyone from getting into my head, which is where the magic happens. She admitted to not being able to grasp the full extent of what I'm going through because it doesn't resonate with anything in her personal experience. How cool is that? Respect! And that's why she's as glad as I am that I found a place where I can confront my demons and maybe help others in the same situation. The rest of the day: work, barbell, introspection. The first goodbye letter (@Svet, that was a great idea you had). Playtime with the children. All good stuff. Cheers to that.

Hey Zala. So you started your journal. That's great! Keep it up! How about you take some time to read what's on this forum to ward off temptation? You will find many fine examples of bravery. I'm sure they will inspire you like they are inspiring me.

TS2, my MUD. I gave you years of my life, hours of my sleep. I helped you grow, kindled your community. Even now, after years I don't log in, you are part of who I am, and for that I'm grateful. My first social gaming experience, you connected me with real, flesh and bone friends at a time when I was most vulnerable. Keeping in touch with some of them for years has been a blessing. Roleplaying, creating content, organizing meetups has been a blast and helped me develop leadership and creativity. And yet the dust has already settled on your cover, and the time has come to seal your pages forever. Farewell, Bodruithog the Warrior. Your statue stands tall in the Guild of Mercenaries in recognition of your valor and generosity. Now your temple crumbles. You shall be forgotten. Farewell, Balgair the Paladin. Your spirit dwells with the Immortals in honor of your contributions to the Celestial Empire. Now your heaven shatters. You shall be forgotten. Farewell, Bran the Druid Warrior. The spells you bestowed upon your people are still loved and praised. Now your magic is void. You shall be forgotten. Farewell, Fayamish the Mage. You sucked. Big time.

Hey Zane, thank you for taking the time to write such a detailed introduction. It's great to read of your experience in Mexico. Maybe where you live there's an international organization looking for mentors? I've been both an international volunteer and a mentor for foreign volunteers. I consider them to be keystone experiences of my life.

Hi Alex! Welcome! ?What do you like to do? When I was at school these were my favorite holiday activities. Summer camp. Starting from setting tents and building the kitchen zone (each team their own) including table and benches. Then two weeks in close contact with nature. I loved collecting and chopping wood, fueling the kitchen (an art in its own merit), taking care of the evening bonfire. Long and challenging hikes. Pure bliss. Also the only time I didn't play games.Playing music. Band rehearsals, jam sessions, concerts, and writing my own stuff.Hanging out with one friend at a time. Connecting at a deep, personal level with people of all ages (well, mostly older since I was much younger).Since you are still in touch with your creative side and are a blooming inventor, why don't you expand on those traits of your personality? Commit to writing something every day. Set an achievable and measurable goal, like 100 words. It's just a trigger to get started. Teach yourself more about mechanics and electronics, see if you want to learn coding. Look for a mentor who's better then you are and who will enjoy helping you grow your skills. What do you think?

Hi Svet. Welcome, and thank you for sharing your experience with us. A worthy read. Zombies - Absolutely. Life-lurkers. In our case, maybe we are a bit like some dude named R in the movie Warm Bodies. Rituals - Your idea of writing goodbye letters gave me a disproportionate reaction of reject. Even just writing down the word emotions makes me uneasy. Which is why I think it's a truly excellent suggestion and I'm going to do it. Ceremonies - As to what to do with the letter itself, I'd publish it here in a brand new section.

Woke up early again. 6.15 is a good time. I miss getting up earlier, but this way I spend more time with my family who thankfully likes having me around Wrote down two dreams in my dream journal. I started having longer and clearer dreams. Again one was about gaming. I decided not to get annoyed at that. Next time I'll just pay close attention. Engaged a bit on the forum and procrastinated by reading an article on procrastination. Today I found it harder to concentrate at work, so I did what I had to do, not what I wanted to. My spark ignited around 3 PM so I rode the wave until I completed a project I was struggling with. It took long but aaaaah, finally! I didn't manage to read my book. I spent more time with my wife and children though, time I would have spent gaming. I love being with them.

Hi Zala. Welcome! I'm 33 and also not a native English speaker. Absolutely. Gaming started to take more of my time since I started working from a home office. Having nobody around meant I could take a break with a game every now and then. Then the breaks became longer and closer together. No big deal, but work is not going to take care of itself so I'll just rob my family of my presence instead. We are all coming together here, where everybody else knows what we are going through. Enjoy journaling!

HI Sidsel, and welcome. Another parent and father of two here, at the end of my 6th day game free. Gaming can really distort the way you live family life. Sadly I can relate to you resenting family obligations because they take your precious time away from gaming. That's actually been a major trigger for me to kick gaming away once and for all. It's good that we are all coming together to support one another. Looking forward to your daily journal!

Exactly what I was thinking! And let me add that I like your style. The way you lay down your thoughts clicks with the way I process information.

Hi Koyote Icarus, and welcome to the forum! You came to the right place to let off some Steam Yngwie Malmsteen - Icarus' Dream Suite Op.4?