Ed

It's 17:18, I'm sitting in Melbourne airport waiting for my flight back home. I grew up here (in the suburbs), and while I still enjoy it here it no longer feels like home. There seems to be a few people on the GameQuitters forum who are feeling the same thing. There's also the matter of trying to keep up with certain habits. I haven't made any recordings while I've been here, I haven't written much but I have kept my streak on Duolingo. I was staying with my brother and his wife and daughter so it's harder to keep habits going when you're trying to accommodate other people's schedules. It has been good though, got to catch up with my family. Haven't seen them for over a year and met my niece for the first time. I did what any decent uncle would do and bought her the most noisy, annoying present I could find. A couple of books that make meows and quacks when you press the button. Also had a trip to Crown Casino. Played a bit of blackjack and came out with $40 more than I went in with. It's weird, I'm totally fine gambling in moderation. Which uses a lot of the same psychological tricks that video game developers use. Watched my brother play ice-hockey. Something that I'm never going to be good at. Natural talent is a factor, but you can get better at anything if you practice. It's something that I'd like to have a go at (sucking at something is not a valid excuse not to try something) but I just don't have the desire to put in the practice it would take to get to an average level. Plane will be boarding soon so I'll finish off this post here.

Considering I have trouble staying upright on ice-skates, I would totally suck at hockey. Doesn't mean I wouldn't give it a go. It can be more enjoyable doing activities you're good at. But it can be just as fun to do something you're terrible at just to try it out. Incidentally I'm going to watch my brother play a game of ice-hockey tomorrow night.

Thanks Cam, Hope you're having an awesome Christmas. Edit 28Dec: I hope everyone had a great Christmas Merry Christmas from Flinders St Station

Normally I'd wait until I've finished reading a book before I recommend it. I'm only 30% through this one but so far I am loving this one: A Mind for Numbers by Barbara Oakley. It's a book that will teach you how to learn effectively. She aims the book at people trying to learn mathematics and science. But the same principles will apply to whatever you're learning.

6:20 on Christmas morning. I'm typing this on my phone while I wait for everyone else to wake up. I'm in Melbourne staying at my brother's place and I finally met my niece for the first time. She's one. Yep, it's been a long time since I was here. I grew up in Melbourne, (the suburbs, not right in the city). Besides it being freezing in winter I've always loved Melbourne as a city. I'm mostly enjoying myself but I get the feeling I no longer belong here. It's a subtle but sad feeling. Almost like I miss the person I used to be when I lived here. Logically that makes no sense. I'm a much happier and positive person now compared to when I last lived here. Time for some thoughts that are a little more upbeat: I suck at ice skating. My brother plays ice hockey, or as Canadians call it, hockey. So he took me to the Icehouse rink. (It's officially called O'Brian Group Arena). I struggled to stay upright. But I still enjoyed myself. No one is good at everything. And it's still fun to have a go at things even when you're not good at it. No photos for now but I'll edit this post later. I'm on my phone so it's harder to reduce the photo file sizes something more reasonable. (I horizontally flipped this photo, because I was standing behind the sign when I took it)

Occasionally feeling shame or other negative emotions isn't necessarily a bad thing. (In the same way that physical pain isn't always a bad thing) Trouble is, people often hold onto shame long after it's outlived is usefulness. Pain, whether physical or mental is never something you want to hold onto long-term. When we're babies we get some negative reinforcement. But we also get a tonne of encouragement. As we get older the ratio tends to shift to the negative side. The worst thing about this, is that it's often our own self talk that's got a 90% negative to 10% positive ratio.(Made up figures, but I'm willing to bet the average person is close to this) The good thing about this is that it's your self talk. Which means you have the power to change it. It's not easy (especially when you first start), but it is possible to notice how you talk to yourself. And change it. Next time you catch yourself mentally beating yourself up. STOP Think, "I'm doing awesome with ____" Celebrate your wins. Even if they're small wins. Especially if they're small wins. Be proud of yourself. You're making progress. And as you gain more momentum you will keep getting better and better.

In what might possibly be my most controversial recording, I share some rough thoughts on NoFap. https://youtu.be/bHR2d3ElkTk I don't expect everyone to agree with me. And if you don't agree please feel free to put your opposing idea into the Arena of Death. And hopefully the better idea will emerge victorious. It's 13:34 and I've just finished uploading my recording to Youtube. So so far today I've completed working on public speaking. I've also worked on improving my German through DuoLingo. It's still fairly easy. But what I really need to be doing is speaking German with Germans. (They can probably be Austrian or Swiss). If you're learning a new language this is one of the most important things to do. Sometimes you think you know how to say something. But when the people you're talking to give you blank stares it's a good indication that you need to refine something. Instant feedback, it will help immensely. I haven't done anything yet but I'll also work on fitness. Either a run or some weights. And I need to do some packing because I'm flying to Melbourne tomorrow to see family for Christmas. (I'm not going for that long, I think I need a smaller bag)

I vote for deleting them. If he's already into playing video games it probably won't make much difference to him. But there's the chance that if they start negatively affecting his life, you'll feel responsible.

What's the worst thing that can happen if you decide to start a podcast? https://youtu.be/ORKLCdIJj7E Btw, the reason I'm not putting video with my recordings is it is easier to edit audio. Rather than trying to edit audio and video and have it line up without jumpcuts.Some of these speeches will be built upon, refined and made into real videos.But for now they are semi-public practice sessions. Theoretically anyone can see these videos, but practically they are GameQuitters forum exclusives. (They're unlisted so only people who read my thread are likely to see them). Also worked on Duolingo.com today. Progress is still good, but it has slowed a little.

One thing doesn't sit right with me when I see discussions on NoFap. Masturbation can sap your energy if it's excessive. Ok. I can see the point in avoiding it.But whenever NoFap discussion comes up, guys will say they've done the NoFap thing for these huge amounts of time. 60 days, sometimes even over a 100. And the one thought that pops into my head, "No masturbation, fair enough....but are they also going this amount of time without sex?" And if they are getting regular sex, it's hardly an achievement to go 90 days without masturbation if you're having sex a few times a week. One of the advantages of NoFap is that with the added tension you're more motivated to go out and connect with women. NoFap combined with NoSex surely can't be mentally healthy.

My approach is very similar to the one I took when I took up salsa dancing. And one of the main things is to accept being crap to begin with. I have actually given speeches and lessons as part of my old job. And while I was competent at passing along information, I was never a natural or engaging speaker. And I never felt all that comfortable doing it. That's what I'm aiming to change. I just had a look at the oldest video on the GameQuitters channel. Sound was pretty good for a phone. Video would have been good too..if it wasn't shot in profile (Video should always be shot in landscape ie. phone on its side) I think the technical side of recording is where I'll have the least problems. I've learnt a lot in the last week. There will always be more I can learn and improve on. But at this stage the audio isn't too bad. The biggest improvements are going to come from working on my delivery into the microphone.

I can't really ollie on my current board either. It's a longboard, great for cruising but terrible for doing any tricks. Rather than type out what I worked on today I recorded it: https://youtu.be/RBfBYQxOnyo

My suggestions are choose one of these 3: Think & Grow Rich by Napoleon HillAwaken the Giant Within by Tony RobbinsGorilla Mindset by Mike CernovichThese 3 books cover similar materiel, Both Think & Grow Rich and Awaken the Giant are huge books. They both go into a lot of detail. Gorilla Mindset is much shorter and not as detailed, but it does give you techniques you can use straight away. Other books I'd recommend include: 1984 by George OrwellNever Eat Alone by Keith FerrazziHow to Become a Straight A student by Cal NewportSwitch by Chip and Dan HeathThe Drunkard's Walk by Leonard Mlodinow

I took your advice Tom, I bought a pop filter. So hopefully there's going to be a decrease in plosives from now on. What I worked on... It's 11:30 p.m. I really should be getting some sleep. I just wanted to quickly post this before going to bed. Anyway here's a couple of things I worked on today. 1 Public Speaking - Ok, it's only a short one again, (23 seconds) longer ones are coming. But in this one I talk about what I'll be covering over the next few recordings: https://youtu.be/3vXwJAaL_1M 2 Fitness - Caught up with a couple of friends and we went skating along the path next to the beach. Yes, we're too old to still go skating. No, I don't care. 3. Languages - Duolingo claims I'm now 11% fluent in German. Also I can now flirt in German "Deine Augen sind wie Sterne" (I can never remember if it should be dein, deine or deinen) Here's my blurry skateboard, just to prove occasionally I take extremely crap photos.

They may be accidents, but you should be expecting them. And if you cause an accident you should beat yourself up about it. I would have a very hard time living with myself if I accidentally killed someone, which is a very real possibility in car crashes. Even when no one is hurt you should beat yourself up over a car crash. Not forever, just long enough that the lesson is permanently learnt. Even when it's not your fault there are still things you can do to avoid accidents. Many years ago when I was getting my motorbike license, the instructor said something that's stuck with me ever since. "Ride as every other person on the road is a dickhead who is trying to kill you" If you have a crash on a motorbike it really doesn't matter who is at fault. You want to avoid a crash whether or not you have right of way. It's not really any different if you're in a car. The way you avoid crashes is to think ahead. Where are you going to go if that red car ahead suddenly swerves int your lane? If that car suddenly brakes can you stop in time not to crash into their rear end? What are you going to do if that white car pulls out in front of you? Expect accidents to happen. Think about how you can avoid them. Quite literally and without hyperbole, we are talking about life and death.

I've been in a few traffic accidents in my life. Scariest one was when a car rear-ended my motorbike. Luckily no one has been hurt in any of them. My way of thinking is if everyone is able to walk away from a crash you should consider yourself lucky. They can and often do end with much worse consequences.

What did I work on today? 1. Social- You want to keep your current relationships improving. But it's also a good idea to put yourself out there and meet new people. Today I went to a club I recently joined. I'm still getting to know people there but a couple of the more experienced guys gave me some great advice. 2. Public Speaking - One quote from Cam's recent email is "2016 starts today. It doesn't start on January 1." I agree, there's nothing magical about New Years Day. Everyday is the perfect day to start improving your life. Which is why I've made a start at getting better at public speaking. It's a small and almost insignificant start. But it's a start. So here's a very short speech (30 seconds). It's exclusive to the GameQuitters forum. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GL7OSKiL9M8 3 Languages - I signed up to DuoLingo and got back into practicing some German. According to DuoLingo my German fluency is 10%. That might seem like a lot of progress for one day but I wasn't starting from nothing. I'm behind where I was about a year ago.

Progress is progress. Good work. One of the dangers of improving yourself is a lot of people the tendency to compare themselves to other people. This isn't necessarily bad. If you've got someone maybe 2 or 3 steps above where you are now the competitive aspect can be a great motivator. It's when people start comparing themselves to others who are way ahead of them that it can become demoralizing. If I really wanted to get my 1 mile time down I would seek out people who can run it in 7 minutes. And try to beat them. If I started to compare myself to people who can run a 4 minute mile.... that would just be depressing. So going from 3 push-ups to 10 is something to be proud of. It's a 333% improvement on where you started.

It's a scary decision. That shouldn't be scary. It's not like there's any credible danger in it. I actually planned to make a small recording today. But somehow I found clothes to put away, dishes to do etc.. Tomorrow I'll post a mini YouTube podcast. (YouTube is free while you have to pay a monthly fee for podcasting) The wishing vs deciding argument comes form How To Fail at Almost Everything by Scott Adams. I've heard similar points before but Scott just puts it so succinctly. Write or Die 2 is very slightly game like. But not much. It's a plain screen that you write on and depending on your settings things happen only when you stop writing. It's not a program I use for any serious writing. It's more to force me to stop thinking about what I'm writing and just write. Sometimes amongst the random thoughts there's some writing I can use. You can try it out for free here. (Change the settings then click on "Try") If you're writing a book, Scrivener is the program most often recommended. To write blog posts I'll either use Microsoft Word or just write it in WordPress. What did I work on today? 1. Fitness - 1 mile run. Last time I did it in 9:16 minutes. I wanted to see if I could get it under 9 minutes this time. Managed to do it in 8:28 minutes. Will I be able to run it in under 8 minutes next time? Pushups - First set 25 then many sets until a total of 100 Chinups - 5 in a row, then 3, and 2. 2. Writing - Published a blog post reviewing Don't Bite the Sun. It was hard to write. I didn't hate the book, I didn't love it. I just kind of liked it a bit. Also wrote 500 words in Write or Die.

Thanks, glad you like my writing. Still no where near as good as I'd like it to be. But it has improved over the years and will continue improving. Your writing is pretty good. If you'd never told us English is your second language, I never would have guessed.

Jamie McSloy has written a good guide on how to start taking pictures for your blog. It's a four part series, click here for the first post. I've started taking a picture each day. While they're never going to be displayed in an exhibition they're more than good enough for websites and this forum. (All the pictures I post on my thread are originals)

Sounds like you're starting to get some serious momentum going. I've found that once you get something rolling along it's much easier to keep it going. I'm not a psychic, but I'm predicting the momentum you've got now is going to help make your 2016 awesome.

I had an extremely unproductive day today. Just kind of let the day pass by. I didn't seize it and pound it into submission. One thing good came out of today. I came to a decision, but I'll come to that in a minute. Once I finish this post I'm going to start planning out the rest of my week. Make a schedule. And then as practically possible stick to it. Today hasn't been a total waste (although it's very close). I did a bit of walking and got some errands done. It's better than nothing but if I don't sweat I don't count it as exercise. Kept up with writing everyday. For the times when I don't have anything specific to say and I'm just practicing I use a program called Write or Die 2. Basically it's a program you set how many words you want to write. Give yourself a time limit. And then you write. Stay still for too long and it starts deleting your words. Wrote 500 words, it's a small amount to keep my writing muscles from wasting away. Now to tell you about the decision I've made. It's one that I feel nervous about making it public. If I kept it to myself I could easily just back out of it and no one would ever know. In Scott Adam's book he talks about the difference between wishing and deciding. Most people settle for wishing. Which means whatever they want never happens. But I've decided. 2016 is going to be the year I get good at public speaking. Years ago I put in a lot of work to get over my fear of public speaking. I joined Toastmasters, gave speeches. When opportunities to speak in front of a group appeared. I took them. Public speaking is still very much something that I find nerve-wracking. But it no longer holds me back as it used to. But now it's time to actually get good at it. P.s. Click here to hear my conversation with Cam P.p.s. Let me know if there's anything you would like me to cover and I'll make a recording for the GameQuitters forum

Thanks Cam. What did I work on today? 1. Fitness - Do you ever get one of those days you just don't feel like moving? Yeah, everyone does sometimes. I had one of them today. Weird thing about exercise is that sometimes before you start it you really don't want to do it. But as soon as you start it can become enjoyable. I started by doing one set of push-ups. I told myself just do one set, see how many I could do in a row....25. By then I'd already done 25, I'd given myself some momentum. Why not keep going? I ended up doing 100 in total. 2. Relationships - I'm not necessarily talking about girlfriend/boyfriend relationships. Although that also falls under this category too. Relationships also includes friends, family, acquaintances etc. I Rode my bike to catch up with some friends this morning (My bike has a motor so that doesn't count as exercise). I'm heading down to Melbourne soon, so I wanted to see them before Christmas. Sometimes you'll help out your friends in huge ways. Or sometimes they'll help you out. But a lot of the time it's the easy things, like just catching up occasionally.

This time of year is harder to make solid plans with people. A lot of events have been planned in advance, so it becomes harder to make new plans now. Not impossible, and if you can get plans organized, go for it. But as it gets closer to Christmas, it's a good idea to reduce expectations that people will be available. I'm not sure where you live, but wouldn't it be possible to ride a bike to the buffet?