Joshie's New Normal

[Josh Braden]

DAY # - 14 

Time I woke up: 9:45 a.m. 

Time I went to sleep yesterday:  11:35 p.m. 

Physical task: Cleaning my room and vacuuming my car (maybe cardio workout tonight)

Mental task: Reading for Sociology class / bullet journaling 

Projects: don't really have a project right now 

Miscellaneous accomplishments:

~ Cleaning and disinfecting my space 

~ Cleaning and Organizing my desk and school paper work 

~ finally cleaned out my car and got her washed 

~ flossed my teeth 

Summary of Day #:

Today I wanted to be productive but also take it easy at the same time.  I chose to clean up and organize things so that my world can feel a little bit less chaotic as I'm going into a new week of college.  I felt cute and cool today as I admired my fresh haircut in the mirror.  A friend of mine I used to work with at the car wash gave me a free wash which was really nice.  I finally got some face products to help heal my razor bumps faster.  I'm also trying to learn how to shave better so I don't get them.  I like feeling clean cut instead of scruffy and rugged. I'm surprised that I got myself to day 14 of no gaming and no twitch. I guess all it took was to just start and begin the process of distancing myself from all gaming/gamer content (as well as selling my console.) I still miss my friends that I made through gaming. I think about them here and there throughout the day.  Overall, I feel like today was a good day.  

What I am grateful for today:

~ That the day was nice and sunny

~ That my friend and coworker gave me a free car wash

~ That it's super bowl Sunday 

~ That I'm starting to feel more confident in my appearance 

Cheers! 

[Josh Braden]

Day - 18 morning/noon entry 

This morning as I rolled around in bed not wanting to get up, I started watching a video on YouTube about quitting videogames. The one that I watched this morning mentioned that everyone has a reason for why they game an why they choose to quit. So I started to think about my own Whys.

Why I started playing videogames?

• because I was bored and lonely
• because I wanted to talk to people
• because I wanted to make friends
• because I wanted to feel like I belonged somewhere
• Because I wanted to escape dealing with figuring out school things
• because I wanted to escape dealing with career things
• because I wanted to escape dealing with personal finance things
• because I wanted to escape dealing with physical health things
• because I wanted to escape dealing with my mental health issues
• because I wanted to escape dealing with my life skill issues
• because I wanted to escape dealing with family issues

Why am I quitting?

• because I don't want to fail my classes anymore
• because I don't want to feel like a failure anymore
• because I want to become a better version of myself
• because I want to feel better about myself
• because I want to live a more balanced life
• because I want to feel more in control of my habits
• because I want to grow in my academic skills
• because I want to work on my physical health
• because I wanted to get better sleep
• because I want to find a new hobby
• because I want to find something that can be "my thing" that I can bring up in conversations
• because I want to be more socially competent in real life
• because I want to grow skills that I can use in my future jobs and careers
• because I'm tired of carrying the stigma of being a gamer

Prior to making these lists I got up out of bed and felt a bit sad because I realized that I may be quitting gaming in the sense the that I am abstaining from it, but quitting should be more than just abstaining and counting days.  But making this list helped me feel better because now I can wake up in the morning and not feel as though I'm just holding myself back from something and counting the days.  I'm doing this for a reason and that reason has value and power.  And every day that goes by isn't just another number it's a chance for me to go in search of my Whys and a chance for me to really carve out my new normal.  

Cheers~ 

[DaBest]

Yo, that's a really good list. I can identify with 95% of that, especially the escapism.

I think you hit the nail on the head though. Purpose and values are the best thing for driving change. 

Keep up the good work.