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NEW VIDEO: 22 minute gaming addiction documentary

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Hey, guys! I've been lurking for a looong time listened to a lot of content and even did the 90-day challenge once. I'd like to share my story as a lot of you have done and make a commitment to abstinence from gaming.

I'd have to say I haven't had the easiest life. As a youngster, I had immigrant parents who seemed more interested in making money than actually caring for my siblings and I. They were both neglectful and controlling. From the ages of 4-5, my parents left me and my 3 siblings with an older cousin who was hired to babysit us. He beat, scared, and effectively tortured us, even my infant sister. I found out later that he was an untreated schizophrenic. 

At the start of grade school, my parents moved us to a suburban neighborhood. My school was a 45-minute bus ride away and I was a latch-key-kid from second grade onward. My life was school, and church, nothing else. No sports, no hobbies. Nothing but homework and television. I was also bullied, physically during that time.

Middle school wasn't much different. I was again targeted by bullies but fought back. I remember being bullied by a high school junior in eight grade. This guy was literally twice my size. After he made the teacher run off crying, during gym class. I realized that I was the only one who could defend myself. I fought him and earned his respect.

Then there was high school, this was literally the worst period of my life. I was bullied heavily by another student, actually intimidated and assaulted are more accurate terms. This student would use racial slurs against me, smash my skull into that of another student, and eventually hit me in the face with a steel chair. The chair hit my lower set of teeth, tearing a hole in the bottom portion of my mouth. I wasn't able to ride the bus that day because blood was pouring out of my wound and this was a bio-hazard. My father was notified, and had to leave work to pick me up. My father is a pretty cold man, so i wasn't expecting to be comforted. But rather than asking me my side of the story, he blamed me and threatened to suture the perforation in my mouth without anesthesia. The student who struck me with the chair received a two-day suspension because his father was on the school board. I returned to school and became an object of pity and a target. 

At this time I was suicidal , and decided I'd simply live life through online games. I played day and night. I played until my vision was temporarily blurred. I played all day and then slept through field trips.

I graduated high school a year early, and then went to college. I'd always been shy and reserved but my social anxiety worsened. I felt like a little kid compared with my classmates who were older and more experienced. I was supposed to socialize and excel academically but It all seemed so scary. I played games through orientation and stayed in my room. My academic progress was pretty good for the first year, honor roll one semester and 4.0 the next. But the courses became progressively more difficult, I became more desperate. Soon I was failing, and even becoming suicidal again. Eventually I was put on antidepressants, had a breakdown. I had several 2-3 month stints in behavioral care units but never really recovered. I was diagnosed with Type 1 Bipolar Disorder, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder and Social Anxiety Disorder. I spent the next five years anxious and depressed. I worked a crappy retail job and constantly escaped through gaming. At that point, I was basically just waiting to die. I believed that I'd never lead a normal life because of the seriousness of my mental illness.

Then a miracle happened. Through therapy, and switching medications, the cloud started to lift. I got a better job and even entertained a relationship. I started to feel better and was eventually well enough to make the decision to go back to school. I struggled a bit, but made it through my MBA degree with pretty good grades, and even landed a job before graduation. I lost that job, due to the pandemic, but I had done something I didn't even think was possible for me a few years ago.

I WANT
I want to start a rewarding career in marketing. I want to move out of my parents house, purchase a vehicle, pay my student loans, and start a retirement and rainy day fund. I want to master Jeet Kun Do and Tai Chi as forms of self defense. I want to write, shoot, and edit films at a high level. I want to express myself through music. I want to rebuild my body through healthy eating, exercise, and physical therapy. I want a life that is more than gaming constantly, and being glued to YouTube and Reddit 24/7. I really want to experience life at its fullest and have fulfilling friendships and relationships. That's why I'm here.

Thank you, @Cam Adairfor starting this movement. I hope to support and be supported by you guys as we reach for the lives we deserve!

 

Edited by OptimisticMalcontent
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Welcome to the forums @OptimisticMalcontent!

Two-day suspension only?? That student should have been kicked out! Don't worry man, having and working towards that "wants" will definitely bring the greatest things in your life. 👍

Glad you took the first step, i.e., accepting the gaming addiction problem! I'll be looking forward to your new adventure, or shall we say, "quest."  🤣
Good luck and take it easy! See you around. 😁

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2 minutes ago, chiliflavor said:

Welcome to the forums @OptimisticMalcontent!

Two-day suspension only?? That student should have been kicked out! Don't worry man, having and working towards that "wants" will definitely bring the greatest things in your life. 👍

Glad you took the first step, i.e., accepting the gaming addiction problem! I'll be looking forward to your new adventure, or shall we say, "quest."  🤣
Good luck and take it easy! See you around. 😁

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Tip from a moderator: "You can quote our posts and tag us with the @ symbol before our names. We won't know if you respond otherwise."

@chiliflavor Thank you for the kind words and advice. Yeah, I took a lot of losses during that time period 🤕

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On 7/8/2020 at 2:57 PM, Morrigan said:

Welcome, I like your avatar! Is it a character from anything in particular? Art style reminds me of the Scott Pilgrim series.

Good luck in the pursuit of your goals!

@Morrigan Scott Pilgrim is dope in all its forms. This avatar is a cartoon based on Shaolin Fantastic from The Get Down, on Netflix. It's a live action show about the formation of the HipHop genre.

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