So I've had to delete the content of all but one of my posts just for reasons anyway. 

I've realized about myself as of late that a large challange I face is that I'm afraid to take the next steps. I've procrastinated and pushed things off like they would go away but reality is that my path dictates that I am to become a well adjusted functioning, happy and full filled person. As painful as it is my soul wants to heal and that's what happening no matter how painful, its necessary and inevitable. 

Love you guys. And i hope yall are doing well!

It can be easy to stay in your head and worry so much what you should do, what will someone think. Cognitive behavior therapy type exercises can help. Thinking things like if i do this, what is realistically the worst outcome? Why can do I in that situation, are my thoughts realistic? A lot of times the thoughts you have about failing are way worse than reality. Also realize a lot of people struggle with the same. People procrastinate when they know you shouldn't, etc. Your mind however, is extremely powerful and you can (it is not easy at all), force yourself to do the things you don't necessarily want to do. The more you do these types of things, the more they become apart of your routine and at some point if you stop doing it your brain will bug you wanting to know why. People do look at these, and know you are not alone. Anyone who says any of these things are easy, would be lying, but like most things in life; the harder things to do can reap the highest rewards.