On the verge of relapse...

[AlexTheGrape]

Hi all,

I am on the verge of relapsing due to a number of factors. I have been stuck at home for a while and it looks like it will stay that way for the rest of my holidays. My brother has purchased and XBOX One and it has been tempting me to play games. My family are ok with me playing games since my brothers do, and upon mentioning gaming they have suggested I take a break and just enjoy my holidays. My gamer friends would like to have a gathering to play games soon. I have already set in motion new habits which I could continue easily. These and a new wave of nostalgia have brewed up some bad cravings to play video games again, and as a last resort I am asking the community about what they think.

I believe that if I could limit my playing time during the day or make sure I get all habits done, I will be able to keep moving forward these holidays whilst still playing games. I haven't had many problems with not playing games during the year (I would just keep them for the holidays and some weekends), so perhaps I could have a 'last hoorah' like Cam did and just leave gaming after these holidays.

Please give me your thoughts on what I should do in this situation, I would very much appreciate it.

[Cam Adair]

Honestly dude, it's all good either way. What you want to do is this:

Find a place to yourself. Close your eyes. Connect with yourself. Breathe a few times. Clear your head.

Now, when you think about gaming over the holidays (visualize it), how does it feel in your body? Do you feel good or do you tense up? Do you get anxious? 

Whatever the answer is, is. Your body knows the answer is what I'm saying.

If it feels right to you, I don't think it's a big deal to try it out. But you don't have to. Millions of people around the world are hanging out at home during the holidays without video games and having a great time.

[AlexTheGrape]

Thanks Cam. I have put your advice in motion, and it doesn't feel wrong to play games for the last of these holidays. I will make sure to keep posted though regardless if I start playing, so I will stay part of the community.

[Cam Adair]

so I will stay part of the community.

This is the most important part.

[Primmulla]

What was your decision, Alex? Did you play over the holidays or not? I was tempted to play but decided not to, as I believe gaming actually creates more problems than it solves. I tell myself that it would be a bad idea to play because it may be fun but afterwards I would have guilty conscience, and in this way gaming would create problems which were not present to begin with. It is not a good thing to do, since I would actually feel worse after gaming than I felt before, so what is the point? Other tricks I use to discourage myself from gaming is telling myself that I had such a long break from gaming that I forgot how to play (in terms of game mechanics, what to press, how to control my character), so I would have to learn it again, and the game would not be fun at all. I also explain to myself that what I remember about the game is not very reliable, as I remember only the positive things, while in reality the game is not as great as I recall it, so I would be very disappointed if I played and it would be a waste of time. Another trick is to do a lot of non-gaming stuff on the computer (e.g. I watched "The Hobbit" extended version), or some work- or education-related things, so that you would run out of your "computer time" (the maximum amount of time when you can use the computer during one day) without touching the game. So far, these ways of dealing with the game are effective, and I can recommend them to others.

[AlexTheGrape]

What was your decision, Alex? Did you play over the holidays or not? I was tempted to play but decided not to, as I believe gaming actually creates more problems than it solves. I tell myself that it would be a bad idea to play because it may be fun but afterwards I would have guilty conscience, and in this way gaming would create problems which were not present to begin with. It is not a good thing to do, since I would actually feel worse after gaming than I felt before, so what is the point? Other tricks I use to discourage myself from gaming is telling myself that I had such a long break from gaming that I forgot how to play (in terms of game mechanics, what to press, how to control my character), so I would have to learn it again, and the game would not be fun at all. I also explain to myself that what I remember about the game is not very reliable, as I remember only the positive things, while in reality the game is not as great as I recall it, so I would be very disappointed if I played and it would be a waste of time. Another trick is to do a lot of non-gaming stuff on the computer (e.g. I watched "The Hobbit" extended version), or some work- or education-related things, so that you would run out of your "computer time" (the maximum amount of time when you can use the computer during one day) without touching the game. So far, these ways of dealing with the game are effective, and I can recommend them to others.

Hi Primmulla, thanks for the support. I decided to try gaming after having been away from it for so long, and had done that for the past 2 days. It has not worked well at all; I had binged on gaming on all day for both days even when I wanted to only play for a certain amount. I have decided to start my detox again (and get rid of my steam account again) since I have come to the grudging realisation that I cannot be successful or have full control over my life with gaming being a part of it.

I can relate to much of what you've mentioned, I was very guilty to play games even to start off with, and I hardly enjoyed the games at all. I would just race back to my computer whenever I had the chance, likely because my brain craved the stimulation and I couldn't bare doing something less stimulating like reading a book or posting on game quitters. Unfortunately I was still very adept at playing, but I did need to restart my game several times because I did things wrong. Regardless, my ability at playing them needs to play no part in how I view them (I don't want to be caught out by the 'sunk cost' fallacy).

I will save your post to look at when I experience cravings again as it contains many good methods of staying away from games, so thank you for taking the time to comment!

[Cam Adair]

What was your decision, Alex? Did you play over the holidays or not? I was tempted to play but decided not to, as I believe gaming actually creates more problems than it solves. I tell myself that it would be a bad idea to play because it may be fun but afterwards I would have guilty conscience, and in this way gaming would create problems which were not present to begin with. It is not a good thing to do, since I would actually feel worse after gaming than I felt before, so what is the point? Other tricks I use to discourage myself from gaming is telling myself that I had such a long break from gaming that I forgot how to play (in terms of game mechanics, what to press, how to control my character), so I would have to learn it again, and the game would not be fun at all. I also explain to myself that what I remember about the game is not very reliable, as I remember only the positive things, while in reality the game is not as great as I recall it, so I would be very disappointed if I played and it would be a waste of time. Another trick is to do a lot of non-gaming stuff on the computer (e.g. I watched "The Hobbit" extended version), or some work- or education-related things, so that you would run out of your "computer time" (the maximum amount of time when you can use the computer during one day) without touching the game. So far, these ways of dealing with the game are effective, and I can recommend them to others.

Hi Primmulla, thanks for the support. I decided to try gaming after having been away from it for so long, and had done that for the past 2 days. It has not worked well at all; I had binged on gaming on all day for both days even when I wanted to only play for a certain amount. I have decided to start my detox again (and get rid of my steam account again) since I have come to the grudging realisation that I cannot be successful or have full control over my life with gaming being a part of it.

I can relate to much of what you've mentioned, I was very guilty to play games even to start off with, and I hardly enjoyed the games at all. I would just race back to my computer whenever I had the chance, likely because my brain craved the stimulation and I couldn't bare doing something less stimulating like reading a book or posting on game quitters. Unfortunately I was still very adept at playing, but I did need to restart my game several times because I did things wrong. Regardless, my ability at playing them needs to play no part in how I view them (I don't want to be caught out by the 'sunk cost' fallacy).

I will save your post to look at when I experience cravings again as it contains many good methods of staying away from games, so thank you for taking the time to comment!

It takes a real man to be truly honest with himself and step up to move forward. Props to you man.

[AlexTheGrape]

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It takes a real man to be truly honest with himself and step up to move forward. Props to you man.

Thanks Cam, if anything it was keeping a daily journal that kept me reflecting consistently. Admitting more flaws I didn't acknowledge previously was hard, such as that I cannot be successful in my life or stay in control of myself with gaming being a part of my life. It still baffles me about how honest you are about your own past, with lying to your parents about your job and all to game more. Props goes to you man!