Good luck man! Moving to a new city is a fantastic opportunity for a fresh, successful start. How did you manage to study for the exam? Going to the library, a study group or just hustling at home?

Thanks Tom, I’ll do my best, I promise.

I managed to study because I realized the exam was very easy but I only had 7 days left, so I had to just sit morning, afternoon and evening at the table and study. Deadlines usually work with me. The motivation kicks in when it’s almost too late, but it works, so no problem. After the first day I felt a “feeling of pride and accomplishment” for the first time since too long. Studying just gives me joy, but sometimes I forget it.

The journey begins. I’m already a bit homesick but I know it won’t last long. It usually doesn’t. There’s a new life out there waiting for me and I’ll do my best to make it wonderful. Everything will be fine.

Update:

I am really trying hard to be sociable.

At the moment I am living in a 6-people dorm & I already met a lot of people from different countries. There’s new people arriving and leaving every day so it’s hard to make lasting friendships, but I almost never were alone in the last days, which is very important to give me confidence.

I met George, who is interested in renting a house together, and Nadia, a funny person that always tries to be sociable and makes the environment agreable to everyone.

Then I met Jin, a South Korean business student which happens to be a big fan of League of Legends (a korean nerd girl, what a cliché) and we spent a day and a night always together talking about the most various things & for the first time in a long time I felt comfortable talking about videogames as well without having any craving. Sadly she doesn’t live in Paris, but I think we’ll keep in touch by message and maybe we’ll meet again this year.

Today I went out with Inas, a german-moroccoan mechanic. Didn’t have a great time to be honest, but I’m grateful for the opportunity of getting to know new people every day.

And tomorrow my classes will start. I’m very nervous but I’ll do my best to fit in.

Not everything is good. My gf left me & also told me that she cheated on me. I told her that I don’t care as long as she loves me, but she said she’s not sure about that and I hurt her with my indifference in the last two months. In fact I mostly ignored her as I mostly ignored everyone this summer because I did feel depressed. I’m trying to convince her to stay with me because I care for her, and at the same time I feel quite childish behaving like this. Maybe the right thing to do is just accepting that she doesn’t want to be with me anymore. But I think we have a beautiful relationship and I should try to preserve it. I don’t know.

A lot of things are happening in my life, I just need to keep an open mind and be a little bit of a “yes man” for once, and I know my happiness will bloom.

Checking out,

Mattia

Uploaded a selfie I just took because again confidence, learning the confidence needed to have a face, to live my life

My gf just left me for good. She doesn’t love me anymore. Right now I’m sad, but it’s manageable. I know that real pain will come in the next days when I’ll feel alone and messaging her won’t be an option. Maybe it’s good that this is coming in my life at this particular moment. I need to react, not giving up to the temptation of giving up.

Hey I obviously don't know you personally, or your relationship or your environment, but I think this can be good for you. Maybe you even know it too. Fresh start and all that biz. Especially now that you're in a new city, it's the perfect opportunity to build up that social skill!:)

In the B&B where I’m living, tonight there’s a 60 something man with white hair playing WoW at the table. Mixed feelings about it.

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Edited October 4, 20187 yr by info-gatherer

Following my reinstallation of various social media on my phone, I got back in contact with many people that weren’t part of my life (anymore or yet), but I waste hours every day on them. Especially in the morning, I oversleep and when I wake up I just browse my phone, which makes me feel not ok with myself. I live in a shared room, so I can’t use the usual trick of having the phone far from the bed with the alarm, which always works. No, the phone rings just next to me and I stop it, and I sleep another 3 hours.

EDIT: in two hours my new roommate will move in! She’s a scottish girl, we’ve had a beer with friends a couple days ago and I really like her as a person. I’m sure we’ll get along well ?

Edited October 13, 20187 yr by info-gatherer

There’s this guy that’s talking about his semipro CoD career and his passion for videogames and I tried to tell him that I don’t think hardcore gaming is a healthy habit but he ignored my point and so I stopped listening to him and now I am a bit sad

29 minutes ago, info-gatherer said:

There’s this guy that’s talking about his semipro CoD career and his passion for videogames and I tried to tell him that I don’t think hardcore gaming is a healthy habit but he ignored my point and so I stopped listening to him and now I am a bit sad

It's ok. I mean imagine you actually managed to put him to reason and he agreed to everything you said like 100% you would be happy of course but realistically speaking its just a random dude so practically speaking it would still give you nothing. I mean it's always nice to share your point of view on something if you feel for it but don't really expect people to share it with you especially if it contradicts with their pink glasses and their blue pill matrix- dreamworld.

My life in France is going good. Not great, but good, yes, and it’s a lot for me. I’m grateful for it.

I’m back in Italy for the holidays. First christmas holidays without videogames ever. Days feel empty. I’m trying to reconnect with some of the people I ignored in the past. I waste hours mindlessly browsing the net. But it’s almost 1 full year without videogames. Again, I’m grateful.

Hope you guys&grills are doing fine.