Enough

[OneBreath]

Hey all,

 

My name's Alex, and I've been gaming on-and-off for the past 20 or so years.

 

It all began when my parents bought me a Nintendo 64 for my 6th birthday. To make a long story short, I have had many long gaming sessions where I have felt completely out of control, especially during my grade school and early high school years. My friendship with my best friend at the time revolved around gaming, and I played a LOT, unsure why everyone else went outside for fun because games were obviously WAY better.

 

I finally sold all of my gaming systems about seven or eight years ago, but I still struggle with this never-ending cycle of downloading mobile games on my phone, binging them for a short time to get my "fix," and purging. It makes me feel awful afterwards - drained, and that I wasted a huge chunk of time. I also still fall into occasionally buying computer games (bought a Mac partially because it's not as good for gaming) and playing them, as well as video game sessions at a friend's house. It's always that same feeling - excitement, racing thoughts and an obsession to keep ruminating on the game or the positive feelings while I played it, as well as strong mental resistance whenever I try to stop my gaming session.

 

Simply put, I know it's not healthy or sustainable, and I've tried to quit for a long time. I appreciate this community for validating my feelings (that it is something to take seriously), and that we're in this together. Thanks for your time, and best of luck to everyone!

[Cam Adair]

Welcome Alex! 

[dwalk77]

Hi Alex, and welcome! Thanks for sharing.  I can certainly relate to the bingeing and purging cycle.  Being a part of this community has certainly helped me be more aware of how the gaming has affected my life in negative ways...I hope it helps you too!