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mrmmartin
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Day 24/25

Saw my sister and nephews for the first time in 4 months. Really happy to see them. Finally packed away my gaming computer, will list it over the next few days to make some extra money. 

 

 

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Day 27/28

Almost at the 30 day mark. I've been back at work the last few days, finally on-site after around 3-4 months of working from home. Really good to see old colleagues in person. I am finding that my communication has really improved over the last few years and I am becoming more and more confident expressing my opinions in a group setting. 

I have a lot on over the next few days. We are in the process of either selling or renting out our house, I am in talks with a mortgage broker and accountant looking at the different tax implications of selling. I have a major exam coming up in November, it's a literacy and numeracy exam which I will need to score in the top 30% to pass (One of the requirements for teaching in Australia). I also have my teacher interview coming up in the next few days that I need to prepare for.

I definitely feel a little bit overwhelmed with everything happening at once, but, also excited to start these new chapters in my life. I know that if I was playing games it would only add to my stress because I would dedicate the majority of my time to that.

The other night my in-laws brought up a time that we all played together, it really brought back feelings of nostalgia that made me miss gaming. Looking back the social aspect of gaming is truly remarkable and I think something that continuously draws us in. 

Hope everyone is doing well and achieving their goals.

 

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Day 30

Nice little milestone. Going well, have a lot on at the moment. 

One thing I want to stop is joining in with people who talk negatively about others or the current situation. I find myself angrier and complaining more when I hang around people that are negative. It is really not me and I need to stop. 

Venting in the workplace is important especially in a mentally/emotionally taxing workplace. I sometimes think that I join in to fit in socially rather than express how I truly feel. I am aware of what I am doing so hopefully I can build some strategies to combat this.

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Day 31

Average day, cramming some study in late tonight. I've organised a lot of meetings that I have for next week. My results came in today, they were not the best but I passed everything so I can finally casual teach. I just need my accreditation to be processed, exciting times ahead. It's so funny though that even though I have achieved something I have been trying to achieve for like 4 years you always push the bar further, it's actually insane.

I haven't really talked to a lot of my friends that I played games with. I might try reach out and try build those relationships around other hobbies.

Hope everyone is doing well.

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On 10/22/2021 at 12:00 PM, mrmmartin said:

Average day, cramming some study in late tonight. I've organised a lot of meetings that I have for next week. My results came in today, they were not the best but I passed everything so I can finally casual teach. I just need my accreditation to be processed, exciting times ahead. It's so funny though that even though I have achieved something I have been trying to achieve for like 4 years you always push the bar further, it's actually insane.

Good job!

On 10/22/2021 at 12:00 PM, mrmmartin said:

I haven't really talked to a lot of my friends that I played games with. I might try reach out and try build those relationships around other hobbies.

Try it, if you know them in person. I'd argue I just use the social hobby in order to connect with the other person, because overall I think the "factual" things like sharing hobbies are not that important for a meaningful relationship. I think being able to relate to and sympathizing with other people on a mental level is far more conductive (talking about opinions, experiences, feelings) for creation of such relationships.

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@Ikar Thanks! Yeah I've never really thought of it like that. Sadly I've almost treated friendships as a transaction as of late, that both parties need to put in to benefit. Which I guess is not entirely incorrect, no one wants to be used. But, I think you are right in saying that you don't exactly need to share hobbies to have a meaningful friendship.

Nice to finally chat to you Ikar your game quitting streak is very impressive. Keep up the good work.

Day 34-35

I have been flat out the last few days, finalising accreditation, professional development and preparing for a teacher interview at the end of the week. Fingers crossed the preparation pays off. Looking forward to getting some structure back around routines. Unfortunately I have had very little free time so I am looking forward to some normality after these next few weeks.

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1 hour ago, mrmmartin said:

@Ikar Thanks! Yeah I've never really thought of it like that. Sadly I've almost treated friendships as a transaction as of late, that both parties need to put in to benefit. Which I guess is not entirely incorrect, no one wants to be used. But, I think you are right in saying that you don't exactly need to share hobbies to have a meaningful friendship.

I agree with you. Myself, I begin to trust people when I know that I can rely on them that it usually takes some time, but after that I believe that there are few people that I would do anything for.

1 hour ago, mrmmartin said:

Nice to finally chat to you Ikar your game quitting streak is very impressive. Keep up the good work.

Haha, I'm happy you took some time to go through my posts! 🙂

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Day 37

Woke up at 5 am today and visited the gym for the first time after lockdown. Really want to make this a constant habit, waking up early and working out makes me feel so much better during the day. 

Also arrived at work a little bit earlier which allowed me to focus on a bit of study and tasks for the day.

 

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Day 38 - 40

Had a productive 3 days.

Managed to have a lovey few days out with my wife and son. Managed to read every morning. Going to dinner tonight with 3 friends to catch up.

Have a big week coming up.

Calling the defence force to look into my old position and if I can continue it tomorrow. Should finally get my teaching number in the next few days, which will give me 5 days to sit an interview and 3 tests. Also have a numeracy and literacy exam booked in for Saturday and Sunday this week. I will probably be on a class by myself as well so I will need to begin programming lessons.

Tomorrow I want to wake up at 5 am again, read then go to the gym.

I do need advice. My friends are asking if we would all be keen for a games night at someone's house. I'm torn whether I should go or not, it won't affect me but does that count as breaking my streak? I feel it would be the same as if students ask me to play a game with them at school.

 

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41

Woke up and training at the gym in the morning, felt quite good. Still waiting for my teaching number.

I am going to go to a Muay Thai class at 6 in the morning with a work colleague for some higher intensity training. A little bit anxious about being with a new group of people but I know it will be ok once I arrive. I used to train regularly at this gym so if I enjoy myself I might sign back up.

 

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42-45

Had a great week. I've signed up to a Muay Thai gym and I training early in the morning before work. Really enjoying myself. 

I have two exams this weekend, fingers crossed all goes well. I've been eating a lot healthier and my sex life has really improved with my wife over the past week. It almost feels like we are as connected as we were when we were young. 

I truly believe that gaming had diminished the romantic relationship with my wife, glad to be on track.

No teaching number yet hopefully will receive it on Monday. 

Hope everyone had a great week.

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Day 46

Sat my numeracy exam today. I'm not entirely sure how I went, I missed a few questions due to time management. Hopefully I've done enough to pass. I have my literacy exam tomorrow, fingers crossed I do well.

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Day 47-52

Really good week. Enjoying training each morning at 6 at my MMA gym, love learning new techniques and trying to perfect them. I finally got my teaching number so I've done two teaching days now and I am really enjoying it as well. My mum and dad are meeting my son for the first time in person after nearly 4 months in lockdown due to COVID this Friday. One thing I do want to get better at is finding time for my study, I need to allocate at least 2 hours of the day where I start working on assignments so I do not become overwhelmed. I might stay at work 2 hours longer or commute to the library for a few hours before going home and then I can focus on spending time with my wife and son. Almost at the 2 month mark, looking forward to what I can achieve in this upcoming month.

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Proud of you. You're doing well. Do not get stressed out too much with the way you assign your time, think of breaks. Better to start on your assignments right now though. Otherwise the stress might pile up an lead you down a dark path.

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@Marius Thanks mate for the support, really appreciate it.

Days 53 - 57

My journaling has slowed down, I aim to write a post whenever I get the chance. I have had a great week so far. I am really enjoying waking up early and training, it no longer feels like a chore. I just enjoy going and developing my techniques further plus I have noticed a real improvement in fitness levels. 

I've been on class the last few days, it has been pretty stressful transitioning roles. Working in a school for children which exhibit characteristics of mental health problems can really take its toll on you. Behaviour managing the class is most of the battle and trying to differentiate the Australian curriculum to meet the needs of the children is a battle of its own but ultimately it has its own rewards.

I completed a number of tests and an online interview for my teaching degree and it feels great to have them out of the way.

 

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Days 58 - 61

Completed my first full week of teaching, the difference in responsibility between a teacher and a student learning support officer is astounding. I tend to take it personal when I can't get students to get on track even though I work in a school for behaviours, as the teacher I feel that its somewhat my fault. But, I need to realise that I have only been a teacher for a week and that I am still learning myself. Plus, I am in and out of different rooms so it is hard to adapt all the time to different routines and students instantaneously.

Had a nice weekend. Celebrated a friends birthday and had a nice day out with friends the following day. Deadlines are creeping up on my assignments so I have started working on them. I am not at work tomorrow so hopefully I can really knuckle down and get at least one done. 

I passed my interview, spatial awareness, emotional intelligence and verbal reasoning tests so I am just waiting for my results for my literacy and numeracy test. Only 6 months until I graduate, I am honestly going to be so relieved when I finished this degree.

I was thinking the other day what are peoples thoughts on doing an animation or game design course when I have had such a negative/positive experience with gaming? I love drawing and have always been passionate about design, just thinking what the future looks like for me. Maybe in the future I add onto my degree and pursue research in the education field around the effects of gaming. What ever I do I want to enjoy teaching for awhile before pursuing anymore study.

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Day 68

I have found myself this week thinking more and more about gaming. More the nostalgia of when I used to play and how good it was when I played with friends years ago. I have had a pretty stressful week of teaching, being casual is definitely challenging, perhaps in a normal school it might be different but I find being in a special setting difficult to build instantaneous relationships with the students. Which is completely normal but still difficult. The students struggle with change at the best of times so I am probably being to hard on myself, I have to remember I have only been a teacher for around 2 weeks. Actually working in the field of teaching has given me motivation to become a subject matter expert in the Key Learning Areas, I have a new found passion for reading a lot of the texts I neglected during my study.

My interview and various tests have come back successful, I am edging closer and closer to that finish date it almost feels surreal. This weekend I have been trying to catch up on study but have found myself doing other tasks such as buying Christmas presents and cleaning the house putting off the inevitable. I need to keep telling myself that I am so close and that if I fail now I will have to postpone my graduation. 

Still exercising 4 days a week at my MMA gym and loving it. Slowly build better form and technique. I might try eventually adding another day of training but I don't want to over do it as well. I've been dropping a fair bit of weight which wasn't really my intended goal, I have been skipping meals because I have been so busy. If I want to build more muscle I need to eat more and cleaner.

Overall its still been a good week, looking forward to the next week to come. Hope everyone is doing well. 

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32 minutes ago, mrmmartin said:

I have found myself this week thinking more and more about gaming. More the nostalgia of when I used to play and how good it was when I played with friends years ago. I have had a pretty stressful week of teaching

Nostalgia is my biggest weakness other than the "compulsion to go back and finish this or that achievement" .... Nostalgia will probably be my long-term "Boss monster" of this whole process...    I've been thinking of working on some kind of list of things I could do to satisfy that feeling of nostalgia without actually installing and playing a game -- nor even looking at screenshots or videos of them (I'd guess that would be even more temptation).   Best wishes on staying with it.

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