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Showing results for tags 'programming'.
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FIRST DAY Good things I have finally tidied up room. That took me 3 bloody hours. Who knew my room could accomodate so much dust, Jesus. More than that, I accidentally found the missing part from my MOTTO Racing gear ? That hit me hard. A sudden wave of playing urge almost overwhelmed me but ya boi stays strong. EDIT. Watching video of other people quitting gaming (HOBEDAGA`s story) helped me. especially this guy. He`s a legend Spent time with my father. That was endearing really. We talked, played chess. Too bad I`ve wasted so much time digging my head in sand. But look redemption is what matters here right? It was funny to stumble upon my urge to leave as soon as we talked. I understand why. My father was often asking about my grades, plans for future, thoughts, anything, hell, he really was trying. And me being a depressed junkie, hating that sense of guilt, so dense I could touch it, I would crudely end the convo and rush to my messy room playing computer games with lights switched off. Bad things I feel like shit already. Well it is an indication of me being an addict, right? And I don`t want that. I want to be free. Thoughts Does the fact I am quitting mean that I shall not play again anymore? Should it be as fawl and wrong as doing drugs or commiting crimes for me now? What about this time I have spent playing games? Should I blame myself for it? What if I turn to pro gamer? Like, isn`t it wonderful to be hooked on something and bring bacon home at the same time. But, from the other perspective, say I have managed to become pro, will I be agile? Active? Socially charismatic? Perhaps it`s my brain trying to find a way to play some more Well, here it is, folks! OH! one more thing.. Here it is my visual XP bar for not playing the game ? How do you like it
Hello there, I am a 20 years old Indonesian studying in the UK. I have been gaming since i was 5 years old and since 3-4 years ago everything become more intense. I play 18 hours a day or sometimes even more during the holiday season. Since i came to the UK gaming has been the only thing that help me to cope with loneliness since i have no friends here. It's been almost 3 years since i came to the UK for the first time and i havent made any real friendship with anyone. I felt that i achieve something while playing video games. During my first year of uni video games really affect me negatively. I was always enjoy programming during my highschool years but since i played video games as much as now i really drop all my hobbies and my interest towards programming, i became anti social, gain much weight and a lot more bad things. Last year i tried to create a resolution to stop playing as much video game as before but nothing works and i went back to my old habit in a couple of days. Today i reflect a lot about how much of a failure i am in 2019. How much i lie both to my self and to everyone around me about how video games affect me. I'm on the brink of failing my year by failing this semester. I feel that i need to do a radical changes on my life. I need to create a real change and decided to uninstall steam and planning on giving it away to my friend/family. I hope that i will be able to fight my self for my self. I have never written anything like this before and please forgive me if this makes no sense at all. I just want to stop lettting go too much important stuff in my life because of video games and start a journey to evolve into a better person. Hello everyone ?️
Hello everyone! I have been playing video games for as long as I can remember. TF2, L4D, CSGO bring me sweet memories when my friends and I were having fun together, I have even dated some girl online. Of course, all of that was fickle so I can`t even play those games anymore because I know I would never have the same fun I used to. That puts me off returning to those games. Rancours? I don`t know, maybe The thing that made me do a first step is being fed up with toxicity and my dissatisfaction with gaming routine. I have always considered myself getting the short end of the stick despite investing so much time into gaming. I just couldn`t be the best there. It really hit home. Recently, I have tried to make drastic changes in my life but always relapsed. The breaking point was dev of game (I have grinded 800h in) announcing that the game would be cancelled soon (it all turned out to be as a christmas joke, it was not the dev, but some other dude). Then I realised how fragile and how pointless that I am doing. I was offended by it deeply but it was like a wake up call. Yet I still relapsed, but bounced back. I understand now what I am lacking. Support and an example of others. So here I am 22, Russia, and I am fond of so many things guys, this is crazy:D front-end programming, game dev, harmonica, guitar, parkour, learning new languages. But most importantly, I am fond of people being nearby. Maybe, the main reason why I ve been playing hardcore is that I just couldn`t make friends and I hated being alone. A lot of going to change after New Year. But here are my goals for now 1. Find a hobby and replace my idle existence with it. Write about it here 2. Pass 90 day detox and comment about it here 3. Get a job and earn good money I ll start my challenge tomorrow because today was the day i relapsed once again.