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SirDylanRice

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Posts posted by SirDylanRice

  1. Day #1

     

    Gratitude journal

    Today i am blessed to be alive and be 24 with so much living left to be done. boredom and stress tend to be my triggers towards escaping and over indulging..lol.

    I am grateful for my wonderful family and the love thats there.

    I am grateful to have everything thats available to me and to have all the peace that i have.

    I am grateful for water and a simple breath that takes in life each moment..

    One amazing thing that happened/I did today

    I decided to be the hero and own up to my relapse. I reconnected with a-lot of people. Getting myself out of the room.  I got up and made a decision to end my gaming addiction.

    Workout/run

     

    Meditation

     

    Visualisation

     

    Daily affirmation

     

    Reading + taking notes

     

    Getting to bed before 9pm

     

    Weekly Goal(s)

    Do my SAVERS. 

    Monthly Goal

    make 10k, journal and look into planner everyday,heal body chiropractor, put a consistent plan together.

    3 Month Goal

    make 30k, Yoga 90 days(Ultimate Yogi), 90 day detox,90 Days SAVERS, planner and journal. Develop passion/hobbies.

    What went well today:

     

    What I could have done to make my day better:

     

    What I will do differently tomorrow:

     

    i feel like am continuously looking for distraction..

  2. How long are you running so far? Because if you're starting your path with running, marathon in 3 months is not possible for anyone and may even cause serious injuries.

    However, if you're running for some time so far, that might be an interesting idea. Can you elaborate on that?

    Greetings, Mad Pharmacist

     

    Hay Fam, That dates the tough mudder 5 mile run/obstacles. Im doing the pre-training now for the marathon, (the books called the non runners marathon running guide) 

    week 1 no better time than now, I read some off this book and got up to 14 miles and neglected the nutrition part back in 2016 came home from it and went into some kind of shock. The pain shook me out of my love for running which has shown me anything is possible, this year am reconnect my love for running and using it to build self esteem and confidence and its good for my health and brings me mad happiness. This marathon ive been wanting to do and i know the peck experience and fulfillment will be worth remembering, i get really emotional when thinking about it. Ive gotten multiple injurys which have stopped me and i learn each time lol. Thank-you !I appreciate you. building my skeletal and muscular system system up right now with a 6 weeks pre training and then the 16 week training program leading towards the marathon.Which i need to pick ASAP.

  3. Keep it up  Bro Fam, hell yah man, i respect how your challenging yourself. I get how you feel 1000%, been in your shoes many times..mmmm..im sure ill be in your shoes... soon..but i do plan smash its fun.. Keep up with the action taking your getting results,love the goals. new actions new results. Do you have a plan on how your going to get a sexual partner because you already know:)

  4. Hello!

     

    Today I'm grateful for:

    • my freinds
    • my family
    • Namoi
    • Madison
    • Meet-up group

    via @AlexTheGrape:

      Quote 
    "I only ask to be free,the butterflies are free"
    Charles Dickens

    Day # 5

     

    Gratitude journal

     

    One amazing thing that happened/I did today 

    Found out what i want to do with my life and how i will serve my community.

     

    Workout/run I DO

     

    Meditation I DO

     

    Visualisation I DO

     

    Daily affirmation: Really long liek 4 pages its about work wthic and self love and trusting myslef

     

    Reading + taking notes

    Rythem of life and No more Mr Nice Guy

    I leaning what happiness is and how im living a live in pleasure my wants vs my needs and grateful I understand how to achieve happiness and Fullfilment

    Getting to bed before 9pm

    I go to bed 8:30 so PERF

    Weekly Goal(s)

    Have a Job by the end of the week, Do my Routines consistently and even write in here and take this seriouslyererer,lol get involved with more people on here will do in morning pass my bed time...

    Monthly Goal

    Have my own place or 1000 Dollors saved up to move out NO MATTER WHAT

    3 Month Goal

    90 day detox ...training for marathon...march 3-4 Tough mudder LA...cold showers all year 5 minutes long

    What went well today: I GOT MY ROUTINES DONE, been talking to people and reconnecting, learned ABOUT ADDICTIONS, learned what i want to do with my life. Found out about an amazing arthor CHARLES DICKENS.

     

    What I could have done to make my day better: 

    Make my schedule set things in it and stick to it, job searched like i wanted.getting out more. 

    What I will do differently tomorrow:

    I will sit down after my s.a.v.e.r.s and do my schedule an set a time to visit the CCC and then go to butte college from there ill apply for 5 jobs no matter what. go to Barnes and nobel get that book.. i want to work on my FOCUS from one task. I will time each phase of my routine and keep note and get my routine down effeiecently and not slug it out throughout the morning. OH DYLAN voulteer work.. sign up call ryan! just leave this open...as a remionder..

    1. Make it a daily habit. You don't have to write a lot, but posting daily will become a foundational habit for you to build your life upon. Daily journaling helps to build positive momentum in your life.
    2. Consistency is more important than quantity. You don't have to write a novel every time, a paragraph is more than enough!
    3. You get what you give. Getting involved in the community by reading others journals and sharing any thoughts or feedback will encourage others to read and interact with yours. I recommend to pick three journals and reply to those. Game Quitters is a community. Participate and get involved. It's not just about you

     

    I think i been really focused on me and my life...very self-fish its okay,back to the now so 3 people, Its funny i just found this...after my post above

     

  5. on page 60 of packet you really need to read this shit guys, haha IT HELPS ALL OF IT , so im on the mindset part, i know i need to find a job ive done everything cleaned up house decluttered slowly feeling human again who i am comming back to me, my brain does hurt on the back side like an ace i can feel it healing each day., tomorrow will be Detox day 6 ;), these last 3 to 4 days i get up and run right away at 4:30 get back 5:15 take a cold ass shower, my focus is way off but getting better each day i day dream hard,i have a timer now to get my SAVERS done Mediation, affirmations,Visualization.Reading and journaling and now ill be journaling 10 things and grateful for(I really need to map out the day i will put more time into job searching i told myself after this ill sign up for 1 but i thought i gointo the CCC tomarrow and do that casue i been looking at there backpacking program). I got trello open and all the things i want to do listed. Finally did meetup found a great grouop of me reading "No More Mr Nice Guy" learning how not having a male role model or male figures in my life have played a role into my femanie traits i want to find a few more toastmasters seems legit i want to do Seminars and i want to help people with Addiction, i never know i was an addict, Total Denial lol. So im reclaiming my masculinity but ive been doing that for 2 years now so i can add Value to this group. I'll be going to Butte college tomarrow look into it. Cam you sent a LINK watch it and it was clear what i wanted to do with my life. So im forever grateful for that, found this stick i call it my healing stick ill get a picture with it and make it my main is a total gandolf staff, walk around with for awhile. I had the right steps in front of me i guess i was just so into my dysfunction in a way/ lazy id ont know but am doing it now. Steam account Gone forever deleted it. Pc sold. focusing on happiness my needs man. i been feeling heavy stresss in my breathing and i realize now i need to mediate more. Walked went out, Tried signing up for rock climbing. Its clear now im looking for pleasure. Okay JOB tomarrow will leave this open will and right about the action i took witht he CCC AND GO TO butte check what i need for my degree 4-6 years. Oh sio back to my day thank you cam for helping me find out who i am going to be int his world. during my walk meet a lady gave her 3 hugs, we remeet again at the end of my walk when i had my stick and i told her what i want to be. she been doing it for 30 years!  Everything i thought was true:) this world needs healing and hardship so people of Character arise not molded by comfort. back to myself and my healing. I will maintain my routines, thats simple to now" whats the most i can do" i say this as often as i can in every moment. Its been helping me push and push to do more so Try it out:)

    So job and writing in this needs my focus and need to relizew the purpose of this journal. Its to connect learn from and inspire and observe and receive feedback to grow. To add a little ill write to 2 other members to show my support.

  6. Day 2 Detox

    Did some damage control with my friends,they want to party in SF it seems everyone is doing great and build themselves up,am share some shame, I believe ill be toxic i know human but i loving yourself and taking care of the needs is priority ill reward myself afterwards, Delayed gratification is important. I really want to conquer this procrastination so being proud off myself after i take action is something ill implement maybe get chocolate to reinforce the behavior if first step if needed. Im not going to be around people during my low- i feel like a zombie emotionally mt brians feels burnt lol, i will build myself up,self esteem needed, that respect ill get that by consistently doing my routine and taking care of my human needs, ultimately making me truly happy giving me more love myself and kill my ego and judgmental side that comes out the more i hate myself, Self awareness i would say i cherish this and Now i go and do it all.

    -Goals

    -implement my Miracle Morning back into my life(30 day challenge)

    -Sell pc

    -Get phone on

    -start gym

    -job

    -NOFAP

    Commitments + Purpose

    -Miracle morning 4:30 to 5:30 or 6:00 help me become the person i need to be to create the success freedom and quality of life i desire with a empowering routine.

    -Journal in this every-morning. 

     

    • Like 1
  7. Nice bro, have you tried meditation yet? Its powerful and it actually grows the front part of your brain which is self control/willpower. 5-10 minutes a day. lol i go to yoga/ mediation chants. They normally just helpful in all my experiences i go to yoga and give out free hugs to everyone . If the spiritual side makes you feel werid i feel you i know,It just makes it more powerful-see the core of it the roots instead of the thousands of leaves, and youll be to busy doing yoga they normally help out with the posses so you dont hurt yourself and with my experience every teachers been cool. Seriously tho fuck stereotypes and labels. Try it vibe with it if you dont like then okay. I find it feels like my birthday afterwards everytime i do it. I love the ladies and overall its refreshing, they all smile(always thank the teacher)<3

    I just got up its 4:30 went on a walk while listening to some affirmations I recorded and then i have a routine the top 1% do for my first hour/ 90 minutes that take care of mu human needs and is like rocket fuel for the day. Off to take a cold shower learning my main role models do it. They obviously got  a map for success. Adding exercise will do you wonders, theirs an app called the 7 minute workout maybe check ti out many lvls and it can easily help you transition into working out slowly. Keep it up man!

    • Like 1
  8. No better time then now. This time when playing there was a acceptance less shame and guilt. i was studying myself in way.  I was in no fucks mode. Meaning i didnt really love myself for not follwoing my purpose limiting my love, I think having a gratitude rock really helped me out emotionally over the months. Really recommend you find one=D

    Not much to say, watching the modules, again off the games. Reflecting: takign action, doing is the direction staying humble while listening to cam just going to get it done . this is run 3 then keep getting back up try again. Detox begins 1/25/2018. I feel extremely desensitived for i have played games obsessively like i do to the point where the high is almost a low. When i play to utter exhaustion meaning till i cant no more meaning is am up for 24 hours cool or 32 or 38. I feel i have programmed my mind for instant gratification and learning delayed gratification is a trouble. Just need to make sure i dont cave into bad habits i find i can be hard on myself and not so kind and i believe shame and guilts a trigger. Back to the true journey true happiness, Physical,emotional,spiritual and intellectual needs being meet. Ive grown alot learned to make friends and more.  I have so much living to do Time to get back to Cams videos and get this shit straight so i can get to the thriving of life.

     

    • Like 1
  9. Hay fam day DAY 30 FUCK YAH, Fapped 3 times last night had a girl over i have a lot of girls in my circle and the female energy made me lose my shit my standards are so high and i wont settle for less at the same time its my mindset,i know i can smash but am really looking for that one i accepte belong with and can create a deep intimacy with my ability to sexual gratfiy a women is on point and im sure i can be better but smash her for hours and make her squirt for the first time is easy=P i spent alot of time in highschool learning about my girlfreinds bodies So, no fapping for at all DONE, i will not be fapping AT ALL for this next year. im going to learn how to have multiple sex Friends and manage that while i focus on my purpose, i want to be like dad. lol Daddy rice, looking for that one solid women who got it together thats why am gettting my shit together,I FOUND MY NEW TYPE besides milfs girls that are 18-19-20 who want to be the best version of themselves.I will be daddy:) Im talking to lots and lots of people am on fire really. The miracle morning has been great to me and cams program setting up a scheduled, getting work in helps too. Being committed to my SAVERS has really changed my character and is HUGE. day 15 on that. focused on my commitments. GYM is huge focusing on physical needs Resting,eating,excerise which is the foundational needs, my emotional needs are very meet, i have mad inner accpetece and outer accpetnce from everyone my populairty is up up and my insta gets more follwers and people tell me how i inspire them so am keep up the growth and challenge myslef more and more it feel great to grow. I have a belonging in multiple groups i can go lonewolf the night and have a great time i love leaving my friends find Friends and meet back up lol. my Intimacy with my group is off the hook so no judgment from me and am really authentic wish you guys could see me around people giving free hugs all night and just making people smile=D Intamcey is created in a carefree(NO PRESSURE or time contraint) and no judgement..TOTAL acceptance understanding,compassion,loving and how much you share yourself man so im extremely sensual like people feel really safe around me thats the TRUTH .I Vibe hard and this is just the beginning, build.com is happening focusing on my HABITS and character. Im just ranting Games are done FOREVER. Church was cool while it lasted am done with that new beliefs and spiritual teachers.

    OVERALL WHAT I Typed

    -No Fap forever(Overcoming instant gratification pushing myself to go out and get pussy)

    -will have at least 2 relationships by the end of the month with amazing women(ethical)i know what to look for(RSD MAX)

    -Focus on routines(habits)(character)(Human needs are taking care of in this)(Miralce MORING)

    -Gym life begin more been doing yoga, ready to lift weights got the books/guides(BIGGER LEANER STRONGER)

    -I made my schedule already

    -Learn spanish 5 hours a week

    -5 hours a week with max

    -I have trimming/ tree cutting work

    -BUILD>COM OHHHHHHH typing everyday for 30 minutes because 40wpm is required so challenge accepted.

    -found workout accountability partner on here

    seems like ive set myself up for success now thats all set up its just doing without being emotionally attached and the results will come from my consistency and commitment, I feel very fulfilled and happy:) going to go spend 2 hours on cams packet later later Good luck on your journey.

    • Like 2
  10. DAY 21 FUCK YAH LOL. i feel great lots of free time these last 3 days, making the most of that time, sterring awway from weed, i think i love the idea of all the money i can make, Deep down sales will go with my purpose, plus my strenths are my energy and psotive attuite am a hands on learner. took a test tactical learner.

    Coach

    Believer

    Empathizer

    Brainstormer

    Self-Believer

    Perfect sales coach witch my own team, thats my 2 year goal geting hired at build.com will be my 3 month goal. i will TAKE ACTION NOW!~

  11. DETOX DAY (20)Hay fam things are great i write in a actually journal now, watching cams videos now comming back to take it all in, been doing my SAVERS everday, Mediation, affirmation, visualization,reading ,excersie, and journal ling, things are great, working, days off figuring all this stuff out, Focusing on my human needs not wants, been listening to audio books while trimming, tony robbins,million mind,7 habits, learning growing might be getting job with a despencery and help them thrive maybe not and work for build.com i know i want to do sales and i love marijuana. maybe the idea of making money of it. Reading fiance book really opened my mind and perspective on cash and how its made.

    So i am commited to me morning habit routine owning each day, learning my life been based of pleasure/friends.. i might just walk away its grown time and its about what we need, so really making sure my relationships are healthy, my main guy i walk from, my self esteem up and am laying bondries. things are great really. looking forward to each day thats forsure:)

    It feel like so much has happned...i been busy lifes good jsut look to see the detox day. Man I can do alot of shit.wow lol been reading rythem of life its a great book guiding you through our human needs, i think church is not for me. feeling guilty ashamed or even shamed is not my moto. Yah FUCK THAT. they people are wonderful tho=D later fam fam bam bam ! Im on No/FAP only done it once in the last 20 days,ummm I could BAM BAM the fuck out of a women right now, am focused on milfs going for this 46 year old and this other i dont know but she can get it too lol.Milfs are best they are filed with so much joy and appreciation, plus i like a good talk, well see how those go will be going back to rsdmax the natural and relearn some shit. I will finsih it i mean i paid a 1000 for it. it taught me alot and was baggin this 32 year old and had a beautiful relationship.I mean it, was learning about self love at the time, we both opened up in ways weve never felt, made love everywhere. a girl you can make laugh all the time or wet in a flash. I love connecting and understanding people. i think i have a good emotional intelligence. Im ready to build myself from surviving and focus on thriving abundance. I plan to move to Tijuana within 2 years.Its probably best i do sales.

  12. Today was epic, The day i give myself to god and believe in jesus, radical change man, Ill give this a shot, i do believe i watch so much healing today it was beautiful:) I am now aprt of the dream team so thats cool i will be Voulteering, soon to be a leader. within 3 months. GREAT FUCKEnDAYmeet lots of friends and looking in identity. i feel like a million bucks night homies.

  13. Hitaru

    Boy, if you talk the way you write it must be crazy to be around you! Your enthusiasm is contagious! Just... give me a bit of time to process in my head everything you've been talking about :P

    i feeel you man cool of you to take the time to check out my story, i will check you out first thing tomarrow boss:) we alive so we have alot to be grateful for=D

  14. DETOX DAY 6 YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE BUDDDDDDDDDDY

    I totally thought i wrote in this, just got back from dancing i let my inner child free and danced my heart out that shits healing plus pussy loves fun.I happily road my bike through the rain across town to dance for an hour=D got up at 4 today feeling boosted technically 3;30 kinda mediated more like zoned out for an hour and then road my bike to the gym was raining and appreciated the hell out of it by slide around corners on my bike. It was just beautiful i couldn't imagine how someone could make an excuse to not go in the rain. LISTEN UP so talking to badass teacher/ trimmer she goes all over and my trim bosses MOM she told my the secret to counter someone negative bullshit energy like blameing/complaining just low vibes that kill you use gratitude when you identify it as gratitude it will kill the negativey i been doing it to my mom and bro today and i stay upbeat its a win win=DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. Im getting up in 6 hours and my body needs rest after todays workout bigger leaner stronger 1 year plan.  tomorrows going to be epic

    Gratitude 5 things i appreciate( I will start doing this everyday)

    1.) All the friends that care about me and i know.

    2.)Brother supporting me like a dad thought.

    3.)D***N the boss he will be my grow teacher.

    4)Cruez for tracking me down tonight to be my friend again LOL

    5)NamNam for here thoughtfulness, her love with me, and being open and so understanding. Shes 46 really involved in our community and im going to fuck her:) shes going to help me find voulteer work and am sure ill see her in an orgy LOL.( ill let you think am joking) she always opening my mind and we laugh FOR DAYS and i can be crazy around her i love it,i cant wait meet her new man i beat he want to watch:)

    Goodnight fam sweet dreams thanks for forums!!!

    up at 4 seems like minds good, i doing no fap all the time helps me, my dick feels a little broken from all the masturbation and crazy porn so i can tell my bodies readjusting you know but  after a month or so i be back focusing on some tail. I LOVE MILFS goodnight!

  15. Day 5 Detox

     Hello fam going to this church event thing here soon, i going for the learning my friends said its not like church so am about to find out, Been out of the house since 9 doing my todo list adn got home at 3 got so much done, signed up for the gym starting tomorrow morning BIGGER LEANER STRONGER and the 1 year workout plan so woop woop tiem to fix my shoulder that needs lifting no joke, am boosted because i know i feel invincible when i really get into it, BRO i have so much why power for the gym that am so not worried about the commitment. i been slacking to watch cams videos, am on the planner part and got it going so time to move forward, i need to addd so me why power into that some purpose, the pain i let games cause me. I want to learn how to live a healthy successful life loving myself going around Shining and doing seminars, they got a dream team at this church thats really involved with the community i guess so ill update you guys on that also they theyllo have people who can help guide me. Friends came by all is gravy x10 + grand cardon lol talk to boss he has a car i will trim for it, then i will save up for a place, next after all that, build.com(was sent an email a month ago) and school. Im looking forward to healing my body and giving women the man she wants and needs you feel me if you dont google empathy:)))))look up a shame researcher Brené Brown and learn to connect :) I cherish women. back to games i think i can be very obsessive, i might not be an addict just lost on purpose with meaning a huge empty void/instant gratification lack of discipline all sorts of fun stuff to look into and work on so am boosted. Im slowly filling it in being patient but taking action. today alot got done my social calibration needs a little work which will be easy really, life is easy,doing is the direction and setting my self up for success i choose to say these all day long in my head, like affirmations its badass really:) I headed to cams videos Been procastrating to long, plus when i watch them good things happen lol. time to make good choices Later guys may the  force be with you:) starting the gym tomarrow. 

  16. So i had some friends come over it seems during the last detox i made such on impact on many people, worrying them and truth be told im so fucken loved by these people. i LOVE YOU CYNTHIA,DAVID,NADI,NAMOI,ETC LOL SO MANY PEOPLE IAN MOM,DAD,BROTHER,HELEN,SISTER,TAJA,MS MACFERRY,IRVIN,J,HOPE,MICHEL,RACHEL,AMANDA,AMANDA,AMADY,PEX JUST SO MANY PEOPLE SEND LOVE YOUR WAY:)

    SEND SOMEONE LOVE DAY=<3

  17. Day 4 Detox, so i realized i do feel somewhat alien and when i went around town all day yesterday i had a few acward talks my social calibration readjusting, I was talking to everyone so thats a good sign:) i know getting my planner going is huge i jut got 2 jobs, one tree cutting for the city and trimming, so im set i will save up for a car and a place, the car i will save 2500 for and a place i will put 2000 for. Gary Vee is fucken cool man i love watching his youtube videos. hes inspiring and fuels my courage. forgot to end my post lol 8 hours later home from work things are Fucken great lol, being patient and working hard!

  18. Detox Day #2 My friend picked me up we spent the day with her kids its crazy when i last quit games during those 3 months sober i made so many connections and my growth was crazy on a socaial intutuion level and made tons of friends,people are understanding and love am taking action and i do doo, it feels good to get out and be alive,So the baby brother, his dad no shes 26 and hers brothers 3 yeas old lol  shes my ex from highschool and were best friends always have been. It was nixe shes been involving herself with great people from a openminded church who have non Christians go, it seems like its more about the knowledge that shared, while i was MIA with games she opened a businesses and is going hard, i told her too she extradionary women and one you will never forget, all freinds know shes a BADASS:) and shes making bank $$$ her own boss and hours shes truly a wonderful person  accomplishing what she sets out to do its insipiring and shes so upbeat thank forever my dear friend in my time of need.She always trying to hangout we have fun and talk for days. I have a social gathering to go too 1 or twice week its great people in my community got a trim job i know like many growers, can make 200-500 a day so ill do that get my place then HUSTLE get a job focus on me me me me me me me me less on others like seriously me me me me myself and I and work on my greatness, ill get going to this thing called i forgot but i guess people from all over to it and it happens 3 times a year hosted  by the BOSS ass church and its about finding your purpose, and am also reading technically day Detox day 3#  ill post more about the event and see how that goes, was suppose to be picked up to work was planning to put in at aleast 8 hours but got home late, i woke up 1/30 hours early and it just want enough time. i pay close attention to my thoughts, trying to stop choosing to feeel guilty and a victims mindset myself and forgive forgive and love, if you stay at my house you might just understand. I NEED TO LEAVE THIS HOUSEHOLD i will work my ass off to do this to get somewhere safe, i will never go back to mys sister EVER,EVER i dont feel safe there truthfully even if she has the best intentions her approach and my step bro is guilt they made me feel so guilty and hate myself more and more and more i wanted to hang myself  and and was did actually. I wanted her to know i lost all hope in her and myself but i called my girl friend at the time who i learned self love with and so much growth. So my sister will never be an option i love her and greatful they want to help-out but with no map for success, and my bro my intuition i put 1000% faith into. The choose that suits me doing my best and DRIVE forward to success with people i trust. I will grow my trust in myself and circle. I feel bad am was late for someone who was picking me up and he was the boss..ill get a phone today,fix that PC for my friend, i want to be so hard on myself for being late when i woke up 1 hour and 30 minutes, fucken girls getting ready. i dont want tto make an excuse so whats the best approach for taking responsibility i want to fucken work i planned to bust ass on operations and make an impression like i always do on a team. it hurts sucks but aww it was my choice to go up so the risk in that and my friends word, Time to connect with everyone today go to behavioral health find someone i can talk to a and trust who has empathy, someone understanding and has real solutions for success. Im happy progress im off to run. my moms hit a phase in her life and low energy ive never seen her this sad  shes getting i partly blame myself, i will work for myself, i also look forward to running this marathon ive said im going to run 5 times. am start with baby steeps race and create momentum. Ill have one up in the nest week. like a 5k you know. I ran yesterday and was in love =D i enjoy my running a lot especially trail running i did with david, Those are some of my best memories is with this friend i plan to reconnect with him soon, it begins with a letter today.I have to few to do, im glad i games till it was unbearable painful and boring...The pain of games and the pleasure of life off games. THIS IS IT..Awesome so things to check on

    -Letters to(Nadi)/David/J-Boss/Cruez/Larua (People i would to write to)

    -fixed 2 pcs one for bro and Cynthia (reformat)

    -Phone

    -Spent 2 hours with cam.

    -Wednesday at 7 Cynthia.

    -behavior health

    I feel great no cravings staying busy reconnecting circles i weaved before this lapse I WILL NOT LET THE EMPIRE FALL may it last 10,000 years =D Lets all have a great day.This was nice..mmm have a good one brothers!

     

     

     

  19. Thank you,first of for taking the time to read, i just realized i founds a place i can trust...i thought i just about had noone...im tearig up..144 hours of gaming in 2 weeks i remember seeing that on steam the other day and thought wow thats its like to game all day long everday....so thanks for the structured advice am seeking that most right now, i agree 1000% i use games to check out hard man...since that last post ive been gamming and sleeping everday....its crazy i manifested 2 computers and am giving 1 away tomarrow and...just reformated..i see savingmyself from games as all this time am gaining back that i can give create and get my desires , the time i will get back will be 1000X better than any hour in that world that wont mean anyhting 1 year 2 years from now . My big bro came by today, put me in one hell of a state to see success then i put on music and beeen think..ill have work, my bro helped me get some work ill be busy, ill figure something out i think i got a plan. baby steps but addresing this and watching cams videos with all this time and create a life worth living for fucks sakkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I AM ALIVE!!! SO DAY 1 games plan watch his videos printes out all the chapters have a binder prepead sleeping scedual checked Im so donw with thi shit hahahahahha seriosuly ive lost count of relapses...i will stay commited to this i trust AND BELIEVE int eh good things that are comming with all my heart. we humans feeel so much!! we are badasses

  20. Thanks guys,i lapsed hard was going to move in with my buddy but my car broke down and stressed really really hard and caved into games, i abandoned everything. i been asking myself why i consistently sabotage myself, ive lapsed so many times ive lost count. Im far from hopeless in my mind, this environment makes me want to escape into games..I am in a very messy disorganized stressful house if i make it, its hard to see it as anything else,SO ive contiually quited never persisted.So ill keep that in mind back tot eh 90day detox will read the content really shoulda had my hobbies down and time management. so DAY 2 i know i can finish the detox again, i feeel so ALIEN ive been gaming for what... 2 mounths nonstop from when i wake up to when i go to bed skipping some alo of meals, all games off pc downloading some dj stuff has been helping. MUSIC i love dancing, not sure how to reapir all the damage i casued DAY 2 of DETOX will slowoly figure this out and take action. I need to get out im just excited,another way to frame nervousness. I think the best think i can do is watch cams videos and take action and have a plan later Fam 

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