Iwill break your post bit by bit, i find it more manageable this way (so i may comment to something you clarify later in the post so bare with me 🙂  Anyway here's what i mean with the green text Life - The opposite of death - Setting a long term goal and working to accomplish it, one which is not in a world made by someone else, controlled by someone else and is largely for the purpose of them gaining advantage from your time and also money. Individuality - basically the same as above. You separate yourself from the pack by working towards your goals, alone, in your spare time, whereas most people enslave themselves every "free" minute from their job which they do for money. They call it "free time" and go on to indulge in all kinds of escapism activities that provide short term satisfaction. By that preventing their goals(long term) from coming true and remaining no-bodys Freedom - To pursue what you choose in life, not what someone else chooses from you. Both are painful, but when you do it for long term gain it is pain that you indure for your goals, and not someone else's, the pain that may make you feel self-fulfilled which is the highest feeling we may want to achieve from this life in my opinion. Which brings me to self-fulfillment. (To be continued as my sleep deadline came..)

What do you mean by things you do randomly and haphazardly?   I actually think that what Amphibian is saying in other words is "We shouldn't count the days because it sets the bar too high" "Better not set such a high bar to avoid failing" which in my book is the equivalent, of "Better not start, because then you may fail and have your expectations shattered". I might be misinterpreting though. I counter to that. Life is a fight and it will remain so, no matter what we tell ourselves. Again, the best way i found to reduce the need for willpower is when  i continuously perform an activity and make it a part of my identity, which means, no slips here and there. Because once I do it brings up all the strong hormones and urges to play like an alcoholic. Which overpower us. I said that previously but it's worth repeating.     Cam Adair recently posted a video on YouTube "I Survived 5,364 Days Without Video Games... Here's What Happened." Why is it not an identity to keep forever? Because it's "too hard"? To be honest it seems a little like you fell and started giving yourself excuses why it's okay to stay down. I agree that if you've stacked up 1000's of days of non-gaming, and slipped for gaming binge for a few days, it doesn't mean you will go back for a very long period. But that is largely due to the vast time you've been going without it. And every one day you play still increases the chance of another one, because most of us also have a significant amount of days we did play, which set some hormone triggers in our brains. And even if not, games are built to make us tap into them. For the above stated reasons, i strongly believe we shouldn't touch games   I still didn't get the message 😉 One message before this one I'm trying to encrypt the message. you're welcome to help me with that if Matt doesn't do so first 😄 

If i understand correctly in the first paragraph you're saying you came to the forum this day as a result of glancing onÑ video games?  Do not know what you mean when you say "Something similar taking place". The second paragraph, you reference "click and examine" in an offline world. I have no clue what you mean, also do you mean you would react otherwise than as a child to this process, meaning you would be more under control? The third paragraph, are you saying you achieved more through "moderate" gaming than abstinence? fourth paragraph should need to game moderately you mean, does not have to be so for everyone? fifth paragraph You mean it's hard to start looking at yourself as either one opposite or the other and start seeing something in the middle?

Congrats on starting the journal back up! Two months without games is an awesome achievement. Yeah, the short-form entertainment apps you listed are carefully designed to maximize screen time... it sucks when you think about it. It's replaced normal entertainment for most people. My (unsolicited) advice that I got from the book Unwinding Anxiety is to check in with yourself in those moments, without judgment. Just take note of how your body is feeling, the sensations you're feeling. Ignore any self-deprecation. Just focus on the facts (e.g. my chest feels a little tight, my leg feels cramped, I feel slightly nauseous). What this does is helps your brain update the "reward" value of watching videos on these apps. Right now, your brain is just completely hijacked to think those apps are beneficial, because you're escaping from stressors in your life, and it feels like you're doing something about it (when you're actually not). The book asserts that over time, following that approach and some others from the book, you'll naturally crave that screen time less. It's a good read - if I find a good summary of it I'll send it to you. It covers much more than just anxiety, pretty much all good and bad habit formation in general. Keep at it!  

Day 10/90: Went to the gym last night - felt real good Kids were up all last night, so today has already been tough, and I have a full day of meetings ahead. Some stress at work happening but I'm working through it I'm over halfway through my new book I just started earlier this week My relaxing hobby (reading) is going well, my intellectually stimulating hobby (piano) is going okay, and my social hobbies (coffee/drinks with friends, online forums, playing with kids) are definitely the ones I'm lacking. Love spending time with my kids, and most of my free time is with them. However, I need some outside conversation with friends, and that was largely dominated by gaming discussions. I'll 100% need to focus on the social aspect, and soon.