I went for a jog too 🫡 keep the engine ticking over or whatever!

17 May - 22 May: I caught up on some reading about finance. I also went running with my girlfriend and my friend. I started actively working on my porn problem. I'm also solving the next pricing adjustment, working on the questionnaire for my students and preparing for the CELTA certification.

A whole year. Holy... I'll be turning 30 in a few months. Next year (and half, since it was in December, so not quite a year yet) it will be 10 (Ten Years!) since I found this forum and took the road to a real life. I kinda feel dizzy just thinking about it. Recovery... is relative. For some addicts it works like grief: you live with it, comes and goes, good times and bad times. That's how it works for me, for sure. But it's never the same. Somehow, in its own particular way, it keeps getting better. It truly does. Ok, so, updates. Last year was rough and now it's only a blur in my memory. Proper care for my mental health stuff didn't arrive until recently and the process was traumatic. That should be awful news, but this year's been strong so far. ADHD meds! Document changes! Community! I pulled some work doing networking with people from my hometown and among other nice pals I met a fellow AuDHDer with a mostly identical story to mine: high-school dropout, lots of unfinished projects, next to zero social skills, absolutely lost in life. No video games in their case, which is peculiar, but that makes things easier. Of course, we clicked immediately. We've been accountability partners for a couple months now and our gears are turning. Don't want to jinx what I'm currently doing but what I *can* report is that my eating disorder is going much much better. I even enjoy cooking now! They're doing amazing as well, with a brand new prescription for their own neurodivergence and several projects and hobbies routinely cared for. They're also ridiculously good in bed, a fact that needs to be noted for posterity. Mira Bellwether, wherever you are I hope you're proud of me. Better health and weight helped with my hormone regime, which helped my self-esteem, which helped being able to keep on top of a regular self-care routine (sans meditation, yet), which... You get the idea. Things are going well. I'll enjoy it as it is now, no looking forward or backwards. It's hard not getting sentimental and melancholic, especially being me, but...  how can I express it? Nothing has changed. At the end of the day, I'm still me, my fears, my life, my death, my brain for the better or worse. Everything has changed. My body. My name. My heart, cheesy as it sounds. I'm nothing like the person of my first post. Or am I? Looks I'm in for a good old sleepless night. This time, however, there's no regret, only wonder. Mom retired from work a month ago. Dad had his first scare with cancer, thankfully easy to handle (this time?). What's to come? We move forward friends. Always forward. Always forward.

Same story here! Grand Strategy single player, same two or three games compulsively. I don't have an official diagnosis yet (ADHD gatekeeping is nuts) but I'm starting with some light meds, been a life-changer so far. Now I barely come here (and supposedly I'm a mod, eeep) but I just had to tell you, you're not alone in this!

Entry 22.05 Day 601: No Useless Videos Day 598: Sticking to Food schedule Day 202: Eating Only between 06:30 and 19:00 (Last bite before 19:00) Day 193: Being in bed before 23:15 Day 19: 8 pomodoros 🙂 3 Things I did well no matter how small -About 22 and something hour fast -Finishing reading the company policies during breaks -Bringing up the 2 points about bonuses and work time so that it would be written in the job contract which it was currently not 1 Thing I could do better -Try to be more effective on the way home and starting workout once I'm finished at work