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Levelling Up In Life


Kona450
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I have tried many times to quit gaming and have started many different journals on this website. It has been the commitment that I have lacked to keep this going like many of you have. I quit again 6 days ago and have decided to try journaling here again as this community is very supportive and inspirational and the feedback that is given is usually very helpful for not only the OP but for all that read it. 
For me consistency is going to be the key so right now I am only going to commit to 1 post a week on this journal and take it from there. 
This latest chance of getting my life in order has come with a significant discovery that I have to accept that I can’t control this addiction. I have continued to try and quit so many times but each time previous I always told myself that I can try to play games in moderation once I had 3-4 months of quitting cold turkey. I let my brain trick me into playing again each time and I have learned from that. 
You see, I am also in recovery from a compulsive gambling problem which almost completely destroyed me, my family and all my relationships. My clean date for gambling is Dec 27, 2018 and I have done that 1 day at a time. I realize some in this community do not agree with 12 step programs which I have used for my gambling problem, others do agree and some are indifferent. It has worked for me and that is important to me and what works for one person does not work for everyone. 
There might be similar programs out there for addictive gaming but I have not found any real organized ones that suit me. Regardless it maybe doesn’t work for this addiction or there isn’t enough people out there to support it. I don’t know. 
One thing I will be doing here is using it sort of like a gratitude journal as well and commenting on my week that was. 
I am a married 49 year old man, father of 3 who has started to turn his life around for the better. I am grateful for each day that God gives us that I can wake up each morning another beautiful day to live for. One more day gambling free and one more day (now) free of gaming addiction. 
more to come next week. 
Thanks for taking the time to read. 

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I've gone through so many different Self help phases and coaches.

Dating related, being more honest, courage building, spirituality, pornography related, emotional repattering, this is the first time I've done one from a gaming perspective and it feels like I'm finally attacking myself from the right perspective.

My point is don't be afraid to try different angles and get caught up on one methodology. Many of them are similar in mindset but a change in perspective slightly and focusing on the actual problem you are having can make a huge difference.

So if you keep failing with one it may not be due to commitment issues it's simply a bad fit for what you need. I personally gave into my gaming addiction and quit personal development for two months and lived life to see what would happen if I didn't fight it. I was comfortable but not very fulfilled or happy. Still it was a way of living but I eventually was able to absorb the limit of the lifestyle and realized I was at a point of this is as good as it gets behaving in this way.

 

The turning point for me was being annoyed that anytime someone asked me what I did for fun all I could say was videogames. Even though I knew I wanted more.

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Thank you for the comments Suns.

On 8/5/2021 at 3:29 AM, Suns said:

Many of them are similar in mindset but a change in perspective slightly and focusing on the actual problem you are having can make a huge difference.

Absolutely correct.  I used gambling and playing video games to avoid doing the harder things in life.  I used both to escape worry, trouble, boredom, sadness and many other emotions that I was not prepared to deal with.  Instead of pushing those emotions away I need to express them to others either through forums like this or to my wife and family.  

 

On 8/5/2021 at 3:29 AM, Suns said:

The turning point for me was being annoyed that anytime someone asked me what I did for fun all I could say was videogames. Even though I knew I wanted more.

This is very aggravating for me as well.  I can totally relate.  Many of my family members that I haven't spoken to in a while when I see them they ask so what are you doing now? I sometimes lie about it or just say work and there is nothing interesting to say to them.   Now, I can talk about a few other things and am not afraid to delve into other things.  I joined a toastmasters group which meets online and now I can bring this up as a topic of conversation and eventually I will find other things in my life that I have always wanted to do.

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