Pauley 1 Posted May 1 Share Posted May 1 Hey all, I'm in my 30s and in my final semester of university writing my masters thesis. For months I'm procrastinating a lot, so I want to give this forum a try. I've been gaming for a very long time and now I want to quit. Not sure if I need to quit completely but I want to give it a try for 365 days. I've been playing all kinds of games over the years. Here are the online ones that I played most: "Competitive" Warcraft 3 and Dota 1 Dota 2 Starcraft 2 Diablo 2 Counter Strike 1.6 in a team Online Poker Chess (especially mindless blitz [3-5 min/game] or bullet [0.5-1 min/game] The offline games Command and Conquer Generals Stronghold Diablo 2 Age of Empires 2 Unreal Tournament Minecraft There are probably many more of which I don't think right now, but these should be the ones I definetly played the most. I liked gaming since I was a little kid. I remember that in school I spent all my money to go to a gaming cafe where my parents wouldn't bother me. Also when I got my first computer in my own room I would stay up all night and play all sorts of games. It wasn't like I never went to school, but I sure had many "missing days". Sometimes I would even sleep for 1-2 hours in the toilet (during the first couple of hours of school) and then later say that I "missed the first" classes. Also I remember a couple of times saying to my parents that I would go to school, but I took our basement key and slept there for a couple hours on an old dusty bed we had there. I was quite a clever kid, but because of gaming my grades were merely average and it was always a big problem between me and my parents. I would say that the "real problems" started once I moved out to university to a dorm. When I was completly responsible for my own life I've seen that I was failing it. After a couple of weeks the pressure and load of the courses started to overwhelm me. My goto drug was always to start gaming. There I would game for weeks and weeks, start missing my classes and after a while simply don't go anymore. I tried to get back to university schedule, but as you know, once you start missing stuff the work piles up and gets more discouraging. I decided to quit uni at that time. This lifestyle was possible since I took a loan. After that I got into another university and similar things occured. I didn't quit this time. I finished slowly, since the schedule wasn't forcing you to do all your courses in time. Now that I'm in my final semester and facing my biggest challenge the thesis I notice that I procrastinate so much. I could honestly say, that I did close to nothing in the last 4-5 months. I did progress in the new university better than before. But still I had very dark phases in which I would game for months and months, speaking to nobody. The only thing I would do on a good day is to go to the store for half an hour. The rest was gaming, YouTube, bad addictive food and pornography. The worst I remember was that I couldn't even leave my room to go to our dorm's shared toilet. I would urinate in plastic bottles I had in my room. It was a mixture of not wanting to potentially to talk to anyone, some anxiety (because I of course looked like sh*t) and simply not leaving the games. At night I would disspose of all those nasty bottles. Since I got aware of my gaming problems I started to add counter measures to my routine. I mostly stopped competitive playing my favorite strategy games (besides chess). But I play this bottomless pit of modded Diablo 2 offline. Also play Age of Empires 2 offline with hundrets of single player scenarios (and achievements) and chess online. The way I play these days is often with YouTube or some video in the background (on my second screen). Often when I have these "phases", that go on and off after some weeks, I often combine it with unhealthy fast food (usually delivered) and pornography. I was able to quit pornography with the help of the NoFap community, but still this watching something in the background and playing games is a big problems in "my bad weeks". I honestly can do this for the whole day. Just yesterday I woke up at 8AM and played and/or watched YouTube Videos until 1AM the next day (17 hours). So I realize that it is a big problem and I want to see how strong I really am. I want to quit all gaming and YouTube for a full year. YouTube is almost like gaming to me, since I watch about 70-80% of gaming content (often it is learning about strategies or seeing esports), so it's important that it goes with the gaming. I hope this forum will help me to regain control of my life. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!Register a new account
Already have an account? Sign in here.Sign In Now