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Jason70

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Posts posted by Jason70

  1. 7 hours ago, TheNewMe2.0 said:

    I meditated 1.5 hours yesterday and it still didn't feel like all that much. I mean that's a lot for me I just felt I could maybe do more?

    This is something I see a lot of people think about. The question "am i doing enough?" Obviously satisfaction is an important factor of it. However, I feel that as long as you have been doing something at a consistent rate and been doing it for a while (in your case, meditation you have) then you've done enough. I personally think you should focus on the fact that you are meditating instead of, how long did I do it. Unless for some reason you don't feel like you got the benefits from meditation as much as you expected. 
     

    Wishing you luck on the MRI, hope it goes well! 

    Best 

    Jason 

    • Like 2
  2. Congrats on making it through the first week! Often times, the first week is the hardest due to the urges and thoughts you have. It sounds like things have gotten off to a good start for you, hope that continues. I hope you're able to get those campus jobs!

    Wishing you luck

    Jason

    • Like 2
  3. Day 56

    Days w/o gaming: 56

    Day satisfactory level: 5.5/10

     

    Not a good day, not a bad day. I implemented yoga for the first time and enjoyed it. I'm going to incorporate this into my schedule for a few weeks then get back into older hobbies.

    Best

    Jason

  4. Day 55

    Days w/o gaming: 55

    Day satisfactory level: 7/10

    Today I got nothing done, it was just a bunch of movies. It was enjoyable though. I want to be more oriented towards my goal. Trying a new routine tomorrow, with new hobbies. Maybe that will help. I'm glad to see the number of gaming keep rising. 
     

    Its on me, to accomplish the things that need to get done. No one will do it for me.

    Hope you had a good day

    Jason

    • Like 1
  5. Youtube has always been a problem for me. I recommend if you have it as an app on anything delete it. If you have easy access to it, the more you'll want to head there. If you're on a computer, there are many website blockers you can use. Chrome has the undistracted extension that blocks things like instagram, reddit, twitter and youtube. One more thing I'd say is fill time with things you love. You're probably already trying to do that, but if you try to do something you find boring then you're more likely to head to a video on youtube or a game. So find what you love doing and you'll have an easier time abstaining from youtube.

    Best 

    Jason

    • Like 1
  6. Hey @Kaleidoskopeand welcome to the forums!

    You are already way ahead of other gamers by just realizing you had an addiction, then taking the necessary actions to turn things around. Most gamers don't even acknowledge there's a problem! What things (hobbies) make you happy? Doing something you love to do will be easier to fill up a day and it will leave you feeling good. Lmk some of the things you're interested in!

    I wish you luck on your journey to a game free life.

    Best 

    Jason 

    • Like 1
  7. Day 53

    Days w/o gaming: 53

    Day satisfactory level: 6/10

    Still trying to put action over mindset. Tired living a mediocre life. I will keep fighting, here's to tomorrow. 
     

    In terms of gaming, had some urges but persevered 

    Best 

    Jason

  8. Hey, 

    sorry you failed the test, it's good your GPA won't be impacted that much. I wish you luck on the final exam.

    I fortunately never had an issue with porn, so unfortunately I can't give you much advice. What I can say though, is with any addiction you should know why you tend to those things, study your habits, and maybe your able to create a plan that will help you abstain from porn. 
     

    With me never experiencing this, I hope this at least helped

    Best

    Jason 

    • Like 1
  9. Hey Anfni,

    Congratulations on choosing to be committed on quitting games! You have come to a good place where people will support and help you out the whole way. It's unfortunate that you relapsed the first time you tried quitting. I want you to be informed that relapsing although upsetting isn't the end of the world. Falling into a relapse can teach us so much and most importantly it can teach us what to improve for next time. So don't stress about relapsing. Based off what I've seen it's pretty common here but also it teaches lessons.

     

    I wish you luck on your journey

    Jason

    • Like 1
  10. Day 51

    Days w/o gaming: 51

    Day satisfactory level: 7/10 

    Got a lot done today, felt like I am getting back on the productivity curve. That's not a reason to stop fighting though 

    Best 

    Jason

     

    P.S. Sorry I haven't been responding to many journals, just been really busy. Will try tomorrow.

  11. Day 49

    Days w/o gaming: 49

    Day satisfactory level: 4/10 

    Short journal as im tired af. 

    Making excuses, looking to squash them. Haven't given up yet, it's good to see the number grow.

    Best 

    Jason

  12. @TheresaThank you for the kind words

    Day 48 

    Days w/o gaming: 48 

    Day satisfactory level: 5/10

     

    Can't call this day great. I never before in my life felt regret for things like falling into the internet spiral. Now I just feel instant regret, and I feel like such a failure. My mental health isn't shit rn thanks to the second half of the day and a bunch of realizations, but that doesn't hide the regret I feel towards what most of today consisted of. 

    On the bright side of things I found a blocker for safari -- what I mostly used twitter and youtube on. If anyone needs some sort of blocker for safari, the one I used is a downloadable app called SelfControl. I have only used it for a few minutes and already it's keeping me off the sites. It doesn't keep you from going to those sites but it does block all content from being viewed, and you can customize how long you want them blocked from a few minutes to a whole day. 

    One thing I noticed is that conscious decisions are important. I found it crazy today how your mood and mental health can change from just a few conscious choices. I went from feeling like shit watching youtube and surfing the web to feeling great after I took a shower, exercised and went outside. I feel like the more I make these choices better experiences will be created.

    From feeling like shit I noticed feeling that way caused me to not feel grateful for the things i have, like clean water, somewhere to stay (even if it is my dad's house), getting food, having clothes etc., as I wrote that i already felt more joyous. As I realized this I instantly thought of meditation -- a resource for feeling more appreciative of all the things I have instead of the ones I don't.

    Although it sounds like my day was filled with great things, the number of hours I spent just looking at the screen was far greater than it needed to be. Life is a constant battle, especially if you were once addicted to something. This is why it disgusts me that some celebrities, when they give recommendations, make it sound like it's the easiest thing to do. It may be easier for them, which I envy, but it's not easy for everyone.

    Anyway going to do college work, have a good day everyone

    Jason

  13. 4 hours ago, hemonkey said:

    It's always important to stay busy with hobbies even if you are done with everything.

    This is a nice tip! I need to start applying this to my life as most of the time, I will do the activity I put down to do and then I will be open towards watching some dumb crap on youtube. Staying busy with something takes time away from doing that. Good realization!

    Thanks & best 

    Jason

  14. Day 47 

    Days w/o gaming: 47 

    Day satisfactory level: 5/10 

     

    Better day, but only because I read and worked out. I did notice that resorting to those low-effort activities is to avoid doing schoolwork. My excuse was it's a weekend, i can do it tomorrow. There's that pushing it tomorrow again. I am going to try doing things with a purpose, instead of just doing them. Planning on reminding myself consistently, "here is why i am using this" and then do it for said purpose (if its online) then log off.

    Let's get back to these good days, I know I can do it!

    Best 

    Jason

    • Like 1
  15. Good luck on creating the vision board! I know you said you had no photo editing skills but maybe the board can spark an interest in that or something similar.

    Keep it up, you're doing good so far!

    Jason

    • Like 1
    • Like 1
  16. Day 46

     

    Days w/o games: 46 

    Day satisfactory level: 3/10

     

    Shitty day. I played no games or watched anything related to games but, I got distracted once again. Been thinking about my relationship with the things that distract me. Perhaps the issue is not the music, or the videos (although both can be designed to be addictive). I think the root source of why I keep turning towards them even though I know they won't help me in the long run is the reason I told someone else about turning to youtube. In the short term, you think "oh why not watch a couple of videos it won't hurt me," then when you do you are sucked into this cycle of just constant video binging. To prove my point, let's look at two options. Music and doing a work assignment. What seems more appealing? Well idk about you but in this case, I'd probably choose listening to music and again a justification comes in like "eh its only a few songs I can get to the work later." 

    I think the word later is interesting. One it is an excuse, you can always go back to it to avoid something that seems "boring" like work. The second thing is the result of saying "later" and constantly using it. How much later am I gonna push this off. The reality is, the more times we say we will do things later, the more agonizing something seems, which will only want to push it off even later. Again it's a cycle. Cycles are everywhere, you can't escape them. However, not all cycles are bad. The thing is though I think we must be aware of not only our actions but where we are in the cycle. A cycle can lead to unhappiness and become exhausting, and also become boring. I think unless its something you truly enjoy, you need to change your cycles (if you can depending on your circumstances). As in my personal opinion, doing the same stuff over and over again, unless you enjoy it, will become boring.

    So back to "later". Analyzing my situation, what have I used this word for? I've used it for college work, working out, reading, language and instrument learning, chores, basically anything that requires work. What have I put in place of doing any of these things? Youtube, my phone, and a bunch of Pentatonix. Something perplexes me though. In order to watch youtube or listen to music, we technically have to work to get the end result. Sure it's not as much work as doing something like your laundry, you literally just have to open Apple Music or Spotify or Youtube and bam, you're there. However, it still requires action to get to those places, so excluding games from this (as I know gaming and video consumption go hand in hand), why do most people choose to consume things instead of study when both require action to do it? Maybe the studying uses too much brain power and using a lot of brain power and thinking sounds like it will just tire us out.

    Anyway, what can I do if I still want to listen to music, have it so it's not in my way of doing what's important first? I am not sure but for now, I think Journaling and just getting out of my room will help. Once I am done my morning routine, get out of my room so I am not tempted to just sit around all day, and hopefully I will find some other things I can do.

    Also learned another thing about pulling my hair. Being awkward in front of other people/being myself. I learned I care a lot about what others think of me. The thing is though, if I am so paranoid about what others think, then people will look at me funny or treat me weird. Sure, people will do that if I just randomly scream and flop my hands around in the middle of the day, but I will get a lot less, if I am just myself. Plus, it's my life, if people judge me for something I do, so what? 

    Anyway, plus side of today was the social side actually. I zoomed called one of my college friends and we had a great conversation. I went to the nail salon today as my fingers were busted and disgusting looking. This is due to a bad habit of biting my nails, and I had a great chat with them. My dad and I talked for a bit. Just overall it was a good social day. But the whole time I was nervous I was gonna say something wrong or again be awkward. Time to let that fear go.

    Have a good day everyone

    Jason

  17. Hey Po

    Congratulations on completing the detox! I am proud with how far you've come!

    20 hours ago, Pochatok said:

    But, after watching just a bit of gameplay my urges weakened, as I got rather upset- just looking at people who treat gaming as a career/professional hobby makes me sad. I feel bad for those people, because they are spending hours and hours on something that does not make them significantly happier or betters their life.

    Yeah I have thought this too. It just seems disgusting to me I guess that streamers and video creators can make money by just playing games. Of course learning how to stream and edit a video and record and stuff takes some effort and time, but overall these people are getting rich with practically no hard work whatsoever. It also disappoints me that they are wasting their life playing games when they could participate in a marathon or 5k, or explore the world or something, yet they're all cooped up in their house. But we can't change everyone's minds.

    Besides that, glad you had a good day today, it's good to hear you're not falling behind on work.

    Best 

    Jason

    • Like 1
  18. Hey Amchow!

    Congrats on getting a job in something you love to do! Meeting expectations especially ones that are higher than a last place you worked is stressful. One thing that helps me with stress is taking a step back or a short break from the stressful work, and just breathing while reminding myself that I can do this, I can get through this. Then after a bit proceed with the work. I have done this a lot with college work and it's helped tremendously. Of course a college assignment isn't the same as being a design engineer but I find that just taking deep breaths not only calms me and clears my mind. Something else for stress you want to be aware of is not avoiding what is stressing you out as that'll just make it worse.

    Best

    Jason

    • Like 1
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