NEW VIDEO: I Quit MMOs and THIS Happened
Corvus Albus
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Posts posted by Corvus Albus
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Gaming has a way of taking over your time if you're not careful. Just be strong!
It already took it. But not anymore.
Do you really want to change? Ask yourself this question. Not what your brain wants.
Are you sure that you're not wasting time?
I want the change. My brain wants something else though. Well, screw the brain. I have my own priorities in life.
Day #23 - Wasted Day
I played again. For a couple of hours. That is it for me. I am moving forward. I am neglecting basic things to do and my daily activities. Not anymore. No more wasting time. No matter how hard it will be, I will manage to do it.
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Well, keep journaling about it and let us know how you do.
I surely will.
If you want to try one more time, try to beat the highest score. (21 days, is it right?)
My highest score is 45days and it's my second attempt. It's been 28 days.
Cam mentioned that it is recommended to do 90 days detox, if you're even considering gaming in moderation. It's up to you. You may find something more valuable during 90 days journey. I believe you'll figure out the right path.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kGccq4pSDk
I have to beat this score. I want to gain freedom from addiction.
Day #22 - Back To Old Habits
I did played for two hours on Sunday. Still I have some time with my friends. I see that I am not doing my duties as responsibly as I did during detox.
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I'm glad you had some quality time with your friends, Corvus. Without the gaming, you learn to value those relationships more.
True. I really appreciate this relationships
There's no reason to tell other people about gaming if you're not confortable. Keep it up!
I will not tell anybody about it.
Day #21 - Relapse
Looks like the wall I built just ruined. I still want to write here about how I feel, because I am consistent about it. Couple of hours spent on video games. I felt much different than before. Like this time I can manage to moderate. Like it is all about me, not the addiction.
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Start a thing that you planned to do, right away. Without hesitation or wasting time surfing the internet. This is critical for me to make a good start in the morning.
Speed of implementation, as I heard. Good to know. I have to implement it
That sounds like a good morning routine. Maybe some form of exercise or meditation?
How about some writing about my dreams from previous night? Or taking dog for a walk?
Day #20 - Friends again
I spent some time today with friends I did not have time before because of gaming. That is awesome. We spent couple of hours talking about what happened last couple of months. They have a lot to talk about. Unfortunately, I was only a good listener. I cannot say them, that I played video games for last years. I cannot make myself a self-pitying victim. This is not me anymore.
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Yes I love reestablishing contact with old friends. Having friends in my life just makes things easier.
Sure, sometimes you can tell them about how you feel. This gives a lot of reassurance.
Good job Corvus, take care and keep moving forward;)
Dobra robota, trzymaj się tam
I am trying to do my best here. I appreciate your encouragement.
Day #19 - Morning routine
It is time to start a new morning routine. I made my own to feel more present during the morning. First I make my bed. Then I drink some water. Next, I have a shower and then I eat good breakfast. Then I am ready to go. What can I add to make my routine better?
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That's a long term goal for me, I think, as I walk more and lose weight. I'd like to take up hiking and see some beautiful places.
We have more and more in common, Bob.
Day #18 - At Least 1 Friend
I realized today that I still have one best friend. We know each other for years and we have so many things in common. For me this is something I did not realized before. That is a lot, I should be grateful for that. One friend is enough especially if it is a really best friend. I should see more things. Things to be gratitude for.
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I'm sorry you got rejected. You should be proud of yourself for trying. Just don't give up. That's the right path.
I will not give up. Rejection does not scare me.
It'll be alright soon... People sometimes make excuses, I also does it. If you want to meet someone in person, try someone else that you don't know. I also had the period that everybody was busy doing their jobs, so I tried to reach someone that I don't know. The result was quite good. When I get bored while I'm studying, I always wanted to talk to my friends but it wasn't always successful. However, I talk to other people that have similar interests these days, when my friends are busy, even if it is via online method. And it's not so bad. Try to expand your social circle. It could be a solution. If you have some specific goals, such as academic or work out goals, (something that's not related to gaming) you can find like-minded people so easily thourgh the internet.
I hope my reply helps! And keep it up.
I do not like excuses. I have to face them, though. Expanding social circle might help. Thanks for advice.
Day #17 - Hiking
I have a day free to spend on hiking. I really like this activity. There is a lot to explore, a lot to see and many places to visit. I think I will do it more consistently. So many places to visit, even around my neighbourhood. I was inside my house so long that I did not seem them.
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Well, that's fantastic, Corvus, meeting your friend like that! Yes, you should pursue more contact. Since I quit gaming, I've been in contact with tons of old friends and family. It's amazing how gaming can keep you isolated from the world!
True, I did some contacts refreshments today. I do not want to be isolated anymore.
Day #16 - Friend Is Gone
I have been rejected multiple times today. I felt really good until that rejection I get from people I trusted. I got rejected from my mentor, couple of friends. I tried to be a proactive person and make a meeting with them. Even my grandmother did not have time to talk to me.
Friend from yesterday screwed me too. I feel lost and lonely again. I am just like White Raven. No one really wants to at least spend time with me.
Although I was very productive today I feel emptiness and void.
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I attended hip hop dance classes for many years. Very fun! Great way to meet new people. Highly recommended.
Good idea. I have to try hip hop out. Or any other dance style. Something in pairs is what interest me most.
You tried something jew, Corvus that's great! Just keep branching out!
That is right. I have to try as many activities as possible until I am young.
Day #15 - Easier said than done
I met a friend of mine accidentially. I did not even expected that. I am still surprised. We have been not seeing each other for years. This friend is not a gamer, and we lost contact before. My gaming issue is one of the reason. Probably. I want to stay in contact with my friend. She inspires me to life the live to the fullest. An example of being proactive person. It is easier said than done, because she is college student in different town. So, for the most time of the year, we have long road ahead to see each other.
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Like Onlysou says, it's not just an endurance contest. You want to have a vision for yourself, as Cam says, where you want to go. Think about new habits and projects to help you move beyond gaming.
I am thinking about going to dance classes. I always wanted to go and dance in the party, but was too shy for doing that.
#Day 14 - Dance Dance Revolution
I have to say it, I tried it out. Two songs, and I was diminished. I do not feel bad for that, I do not feel relapsed. It was during an event in my city. I want to learn dancing in a real way. And I am going to do so. Dance classes, here we go.
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Perseverance it's good but it's not enough. If you stay from games 90 days and you have not created the new lifestyle with new habits, attitude to life you will in the end gaming again! Be aware dude.
I will keep that in mind, pal.
Perseverance it's good but it's not enough. If you stay from games 90 days and you have not created the new lifestyle with new habits, attitude to life you will in the end gaming again! Be aware dude.
Exactly, yes.
Double agreement.
Day #13 - Nightcore
It looks like a trigger to me - listening to this whole nightcore music. It is sped up well-known songs which are really fast. They are giving me lots and lots of positive emotions during listening and somehow reminds me about gaming. How does it really work - I do not know.
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Think about what you really want and hang in there!
I want to be free just like the bird.
I'm fortunate in that I don't have gamer friends tempting me. You're strong for resisting that.
Easier for you to become game free.
Day #12 - Perseverance
I want to be more persevere. I have to. How otherwise I will be able to deal with this addiction? I have to. I have to face it, not escape it. So, perseverance is the key.
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You're doing great, Corvus. I'm about 30 days in and it feels like an eternity sometimes but it's all for the good. You'll have difficult times, pain, and stress, sure, but you'll face them because you won't escape into video games.
Sure, I do not want to espace into video games. I have to learn how to deal with life difficulties without them.
Day #11 - Dreams about gaming
I have a dream about relapsing last night. Horrible idea. Probably caused by my friends, I came to my friend's house and people were watching cinematic trailers of new video games. Horrible idea, however we watched only about 5-10 minutes of them. It did not triggered me. I treated it as movie trailers. Then we spend some good time on board games. I feel better after writing this here.
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If you watch Cam's youtube videos, he mentions that we are so hyperstimulated from gaming that when we quit gaming, everything seems boring by comparison. In time, you'll start enjoying other activities more.
Yes I think sleep disturbance could be withdrawal. In my case it's less sleep not more so I would love to have your problem.
I cannot wait for a time to enjoy other activities more. Just detox, detox, detox and everything will become normal.
Day #10 - two digit number
Finally I have ten percent of my detox behind me! It is really great to see that I am still into it. It is not so much pain as in the beginning. I must be patient and stay focused right now. So, let me be more patient with everything when the pain hits me and when difficult time appear. I want to manage everything during that time. I have to, I just have to.
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It could be withdrawal. I experienced irritability a lot when I got rid of gaming as well as frustration. I could get grumpy with my mom a lot too. Just hang in there you'll get through it.
Sure. I need to stay cool and I will be fine. Today new withdrawals approached.
Day #9 - Sleeping
Well, I slept today for about 7 hours during the night and 3 hours during the day. So many hours I have been sleeping today, but it is still better than gaming during that time. Sleeping disturbances is one of the withdrawal, right?
Another thing with numb pleasure response. Many activities does not give me pleasure, while they should be. One of them is writing. I really like writing about a story, but I feel so empty when I want to create something today. No ideas, no story, no writing. Let us just stay cool with that.
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It's a tough battle. For me, the junk food went hand in hand with the gaming. It was hard to picture gaming without a soda in my hand and gorging on chips and sweets. It was better for me to quit them in tandem. Just keep fighting!
For me, it all started when I made it to have a job. Before that, my parents gave me very little amount of money for my own things (something like 5$ per months) and this was something that learned me how to spare money. When I am working, I have more money than 5$ to spend, so I am using it for junk food. This habit should be changed.
I in your place would educate myself on nutrition / self development / meditation / obesity and you will be have much stronger willpower! Like one dude said: Educate or masturbate/ eat junk food/ whatever. My next suggestion to you set your own system of the day.(Schedule, GTD, small tasks to complete) Good books on this topic are GTD David Allen, The Power of Habit and The Slight Edge. Be strong my polish friend.
Willpower is really important to be strong person in life. I will definitely check that books out. I will be strong.
Day #8 - Saint Anger
I got angry on my parents. Without any specific reason. They are only caring too much about me, treating me like I am 10 year old irresponsible boy. I am 21 instead. Sometimes it is hard to manage my anger against the others, so I should work on that to prevent this situation in the future. This might be withdrawal from gaming aswell.
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Day #7 - Swiftly!
I am today kind of off-the-beaten track. This update is quick because I am writing via mobile device. I am fine, alive and full of happiness because of discovering new places.
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You would be surprised how important a clean living environment and a simple breeze can be to your mood. They can really lift your depression and give you a sense of accomplishment. You did great, Corvus.
I did and I will do it again once it is need to be done. Thank you.
My room is cleanest thing in the house because i love order and not a mess. Like @Mettermrck said clean enviroment is crucial!
I want to make my room the cleanest one too.
Day #6 - Nutrition
I neglected eating food today. Only junkie shit like snacks and drinking it with coke. Ah, and sweets. Lots and lots of sweets. I am not sure why it happened, but I have to be more consisent here. Without it I am closer to lose contact with outer world. Again. And I don't want it once I am back here. I want to be free just like a bird really is. And freedom of doing what I want does not mean freedom of eating what my brain wants.
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One thing you have to watch out for is negative thinking when it comes to other people. It can be tempting to think that peopme think less of you when they really don't. Just don't retreat inside yourself and isolate yourself from everybody. I struggle with this myself.
It is tough sometimes to not think about people so negative. But I have to manage it.
You don't have to tell somebody else about your situation. And there must be someone who understands you. People are different, but at the same time, they are similar. You're gonna find someone during your journey! Don't worry. It's only day 4!
Day 4 is a big achievement for me so far. Some people understands me, others do not.
Don't expect that people will be always good on you. Life is not fair. Accept this and you will be little more free.
Life is not fair. Most people are not good from their nature, so there is no particular reason to be good for me.
Day #5 - Rebuild what remains.
I feel a little bit better right now. Made some cleaning inside my house, so this place looks more like home. Also made some more ventilation - by opening the windows from both sides of the house. That is a relief for high temperatures. It looks like the mood is swinging - I need to be focused and stay cool and level-headed.
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Had to do the Fahrenheit conversion in my head haha. x 1.8 + 32. It's been a while. I still hear video game soundtracks in my head. I hear the somber piano theme from Mass Effect 3 and I almost tear up. Hang in there, Corvus!
I will hang in there. Music from games looks like the symptom of my need for detox.
@Mettermrck all I remember about the conversion from my programming days is that 100 degrees fahrenheit is about 38 degrees.
@Corvus Albus I feel your pain about gaming dreams - I still get them after 72 days, and I think I will for a while. The only thing I can say to you about them is when you wake up, don't get on the computer. Make yourself busy doing something else - making a big breakfast, going for a walk, doing chores around the house. I have found that if I get on the computer after having a dream like that it is all over red rover - either I will start playing games or I will endlessly surf the web about games. Either way, the tempo is set for the day and pretty much ruins your whole day.
I appreciate your advice. Not going to the computer first thing in the morning is a good one. Tempo is important, however being hot outside can stop me for a while.
Poland neighbour in Slovakia is also hot, i think hotter 34 degrees Celsius = 93.2 degrees Fahrenheit. Very hot is from 10:00am to 04:00pm. Humidity is high and i can't breath normally. But it's manageable. Exercise is litte bit harder but reading book is almost ok. Go and face your fears and artificial limitations!
I did a walk during the time you pinpointed and that was a misery. But at least I have legs so I can walk anytime I want. I will face my fears.
Day #4 - Fears
I feel wrong each time I want to go outside. There are people. People who might have wrong intentions. Some of them might stab me in the back, others may confuse me with words and there are many of them who wants to misuse the information I give them. Finding the ways to deal with phobias I have. I do not care what others say, that is the external shell of mine, but what happens inside me, oh, only I know how it hurts. Each time I trust someone and share about myself. I got criticised multiple times so far, so is there anyone who will truly understand me in this world? There should be good people out here, should not they? I hope they are, because only hope dies last.
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Day #3 - Excuse me?
This fight is a tough one. I have to tackle high temperatures right now. I am not used to it. 31 Celsius degrees. This is probably the best excuse I can create - go back to virtual because it is hot. It is going to be hot! I have to manage this even though I don't like it. No time for excuses or justifications. I need to stay cool and refreshed, well, literally.
I feel more like gaming soundtrack attacks want to assure me that I am insane. Music is not the only enemy foe here - my mind play a game with achievement sounds each time I do something good. How to harness this beast inside me?
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You've taken a great first step, Corvus. Don't beat yourself up. You were trapped in a world of numbing yourself. Now's your chance to step out and find who you really are. Take credit for getting here and taking these first steps.
Allright, I just need to stay strong and patient.
Love and respect yourself. All you need is love. Love build bridges. You actually on your way to be better version of yourself! Forgive yourself. Past is past, learn from it and go on. Dont cry over spilled milk. Its your life and you have the power to change it.
I forgive myself. That is the best way to do it at this moment
Day #2 - Dreams are tough
Dreams are so surrealistic. They just come and go, some of them I remember from last night. I felt like I played it. The game which I left behind and I was crushed, my character died in suffering. RPGs were made only to win for me, so I could become a better player. I never play to lose. Without winning it is completely useless. I remember how strong it influences me when I lost it is like the biggest dishonor for myself like I could not stand it and I had anger attack. So, dreams are not helping me, but I am going to withstand them. Each time my brain play a game with me, I will not beat myself up for that. It is just playing with chemicals to provoke me to go back. But I must not. There is no way back.
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Hi, Corvus! I was a big lover of RPGs, especially for the stories. I like to write as well and as I withdraw from games, I hope to express myself creatively just like you. Hope to see your thoughts in your journal!
Hi Mettermrck! I desire to express myself creatively too. Maybe journalling could help.
Welcome ! Feel free to pm or ICQ.
Welcome, OnlySoul! Thanks for the offer.
Welcome!
Welcome, Founder.
You're ahead of the curve starting at 21! The possibilities are endless at your age, good luck mate.
I think that age is just a number. I should take same action to see this endless possibilities first.
Yo Corvus!
Man I wish I would have done what you are doing at 21! There's a lot of us who didn't find this amazing resource until much much later in life. I am 28! So way to go on that.
I'm a writer too! What kind of material do you like? Got any favorite authors?
Anyways, welcome to the group, happy to you have you!
Best,
Moe
Hello, Moe Smith, thanks for following me.
I just googled "how to quit computer games" and sign up here, that's all so far.
I like fantasy of any kind, but my must favourites are post-apocalyptic scenario - I realised this after reading Apocalypse Z Trilogy by Manel Loureiro.
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Day #1
I feel the pain. The pain caused by wasted time. That's even worser than my physical pain. I feel that inside my head. Like bashing my head over a wall dozen times. The voice, he wants me to go back, to waste my life. I want a change. I want to be better version of myself. I want a freedom in my life. I am going to be responsible guy - not the one who is just a big failure. Past myself is gone - and it never comes back.
The Story of Corvus Albus
in Daily Journals
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I will try it out and let you know if it works for me. Thanks for advice.
Looks like I have a lot to read about. Thanks for suggestion, Bob.
#Day 24 - I Should Do Something Else
I installed Steam today. And played some games on that device. Wasted about 5 hours on games. I should cut down on it. Maybe trying to play one card game, I mean one ranked game per day is a solution here?