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Well done on sticking to your habits for so long. I can appreciate the amount of effort it must have taken to achieve over 100 days of no useless videos. I struggle with this a lot. Great work on learning German for 50 minutes and doing an afternoon jog. What do you use to learn German?

Day 4 of no gaming. Except I still use a game disguised as a "habit tracker" app. I also use a game disguised as a "play to earn" game. I feel proud of myself though because I went to badminton even though I had a headache and my back was a bit "sore." This fulfilled many different needs such as mental engagement, a sense of progress, relieving boredom, escaping from work and making friends. They actually have this club every night so in theory, I could go every night if I wanted to get something social done. I composed my first song in a very long time, maybe three to four months I haven't composed. I'm proud of myself for that. I went to a violin lesson for 1.5 hours today. Another achievement. I studied portuguese for 25 minutes. I did yoga. I woke up early. I think I need a lot of protein though, I haven't been getting enough.

Entry 22.5 Day 127: No Useless Videos Day 959: Sticking to Food schedule Day 562: Eating Only between 06:30 and 19:00 (Last bite before 19:00) Day 110: Being in bed before 23:15 3 Things I did well, no matter how small  -8 Concentrated work units -Afternoon jog -50 minutes or so german learning 1 Thing I could do better -Having planned for the pears before the food plan started, even better to write the plan on Tuesday just in case i forget smthng Gaming (Death, Slavery, Regret, Disease) - 5 Yan (Life, Individuality, Freedom, Purpose, Self-Fulfillment) - 128

Hi all. I've already mentioned the gaming profile 'trim'/re-order that I did last weekend, and the would-be trap of a few more sessions this week were borne of a similar 'Oh, just finish up with this, and that' line of thinking. But I had the thought that I was also trying to narrow down the sort of activity I'd like to spend 'unproductive' time on whilst offline. Obviously, tracking time during 'activities' is a lot more pressured when counting game actions per minute/points per hour - and that feels competent - but the thing is, if I knew for certain what could fill a space of 40-90 minutes (my average 'bored' time block), and could then let go, and 'build' - like I was doing on my computer - that would be 'problem solved'. Typing this is similar, but I wouldn't actively take pictures and show everybody to inspire them. After all, a majority of healthy people are supposedly ever-motivated by love, career, tidiness, etc. I'm looking for 'fixes' of low-risk creativity, almost.  I had a bad dream the night before last (waking up at 4am, eventually napping later-morning), and though my ever-decisive-on-what's-crazy-and-what's-not parent said I shouldn't derive meaning from dreams, they themselves featured in it. That idea that the subconscious is reflected in dreams is very difficult for me to shake. Anyway, I reached out to two people, and breaking a significant silent streak of non-contact and self-absorption was incredibly stressful. I couldn't even start a gaming session in that state, and simply repeated phrases to myself to calm down, before opening an easy book and concentrating, one word at a time. ____________ @Yan This is going to sound stupid, but something usually tells me whether I'm 'reading' a 'safe' or otherwise social situation, and my condition quickly (perhaps too quickly) determines whether or not to bother sharing anything about my day/respond to disinterest. Someone I already knew told me the same thing, out of nowhere, as well as the old 'simply just do whatever you're afraid of'. The thing is, I do often have time to think of reasons why fear is sensible (potentially too many), and how things have played out in the past. I read that NPD-related issues can start with a way of experience that is (or becomes) too 'at odds' with initial relationship partners, and real confidence doesn't really develop. I've been character-assassinated before, in this regard. Sending y'all strength. ~ Matt

Thank you! I still have days where I watch montages but they have become very rare. 🙂 its not a habit anymore.