clarification I meant today, by "next running sunday"

Don't give in. Get a few things out of the way each day. I divide that into healthy eating, healthy communication (can be a kind exchange with a neighbour), getting clothes in order and light exercise. If you break a sweat each day from moderate exercise these thoughts will terminate.  I have to push myself to do something new each day to terminate doubts in my head.    

day 12 My mind short circuits from lack of planning or targeted action. It switches to remorse over old time failures. During  school  years i played the same maps in the strategy game genre and this was combined with competition anxiety. So the mind was trained to repetitively enter a state of anxiety.   I treat work like a video game in that i try to work against time pressure. That is the sole driving factor. Danger and risk of loss mobilize my strength. But this is an unreliable defeatist attitude. People dont wait for time pressure but rather complete work with enough breaks in between. If i leave work and dont do something, the mind can go into a pitfall of worrying over meaningless things or recollecting trauma. The thinking stops if i speak to someone or do something.  

Entry 9.5 (Written on 10.5) Day 114: No Useless Videos Day 946: Sticking to Food schedule Day 549: Eating Only between 06:30 and 19:00 (Last bite before 19:00) Day 97: Being in bed before 23:15 3 Things I did well no matter how small  -5 Concentrated work units -8 theory units -Finishing the booking of a lesson for brother's BDay 1 Thing I could do better -Again having planned the call to brother, as I'm going to have to fit it in regarding his birthday in an unplanned manner now -_- Gaming (Death, Slavery, Regret, Disease) - 5 Yan (Life, Individuality, Freedom, Purpose, Self-Fulfillment) - 115 @Amphibian220 Hey your reply got a little bit pushed back, will work on replying in the next few days.

Entry 8.5 (Written on 10.5, accidentally missed it so it seems.) Day 113: No Useless Videos Day 945: Sticking to Food schedule Day 548: Eating Only between 06:30 and 19:00 (Last bite before 19:00) Day 96: Being in bed before 23:15 3 Things I did well no matter how small  -5 Concentrated work units -8 theory units -Calling regarding birthday gift to my brother to two bike riding teachers 1 Thing I could do better -Havign planned things like the gq entry regarding the food plan and not leave schedule for it just like I'm doing now with this gq entry Gaming (Death, Slavery, Regret, Disease) - 5 Yan (Life, Individuality, Freedom, Purpose, Self-Fulfillment) - 114