Do not trivialize this effort.

[Some Yahoo]

I am still struggling heavily with focus.  It's going to take time, I know.  Another day of my mind trying to escape from its tasks like a rat from a trap.  Hulu, YouTube, email, even GameQuitters. 

I was always super demoralized when a friend or loved one told me "just stop gaming.  It's your mind, it's your decision."  I knew it was a deeper problem than that, and that the people I cared about didn't understand.  But even now, as I struggle to reclaim my own life, I realize that it's much deeper than I even realized.  

It's saddening to think that my own mind struggles to avoid doing what I myself have tasked it with.  I would think my own mind might at least make some attempt to stay on task.  But it's like there's some spaz in my head grabbing the joystick and jerking it in any direction just to prevent it from accomplishing the tasks that are best for me.  Like my life is ruled over by a toddler.

Listen.

You're going to struggle.  You're going to fail.  Ultimately you can win, but it's gonna take work.  It'd be nice if our support networks had any clue what we're going through, but some of us are going to have to get through it with our own internal resources.  If you have friends or family who support you, then that's an amazing advantage.  Thank God for that, not everyone gets it.  Even if they can't really understand, they at least support you.

It's not easy, it's  not trivial.  You - we - are freaking heroes fighting for our own lives.  It's not the Avengers, but it is heroic nonetheless.