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blackgiraffe22

Quitting CSGO and gaming as a whole.

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Hello there,

I am a 20 years old Indonesian studying in the UK. I have been gaming since i was 5 years old and since 3-4 years ago everything become more intense. I play 18 hours a day or sometimes even more during the holiday season. Since i came to the UK gaming has been the only thing that help me to cope with loneliness since i have no friends here. It's been almost 3 years since i came to the UK for the first time and i havent made any real friendship with anyone. I felt that i achieve something while playing video games. During my first year of uni video games really affect me negatively. I was always enjoy programming during my highschool years but since i played video games as much as now i really drop all my hobbies and my interest towards programming, i became anti social, gain much weight and a lot more bad things. Last year i tried to create a resolution to stop playing as much video game as before but nothing works and i went back to my old habit in a couple of days. 

Today i reflect a lot about how much of a failure i am in 2019. How much i lie both to my self and to everyone around me about how video games affect me. I'm on the brink of failing my year by failing this semester. I feel that i need to do a radical changes on my life. I need to create a real change and decided to uninstall steam and planning on giving it away to my friend/family. I hope that i will be able to fight my self for my self. 

I have never written anything like this before and please forgive me if this makes no sense at all.

I just want to stop lettting go too much important stuff in my life because of video games and start a journey to evolve into a better person. Hello everyone ?️

 

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