conorshand 7 Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 Day One It's funny coming back to my old, incomplete, Respawn journal from 2018. Reading the reasons as to why I play video games, and the reasons I want to quit, are jarringly similar to where I'm now at once again, but 5 years apart. The former being escapism, boredom, anxiety and depression, the latter to be dependable, to grow, to ultimately live. Five years later and I'm asking the same questions and giving myself the same answers. It makes me wonder, what if I'd stuck at it, completed the course, and somehow managed to shake the monkey brain motivation to watch level up after level up. Equally pertinent a point however is the fact that if the questions and answers in the Respawn journal are just the same now as they were then, that it is more evident than ever that I need to try this again, firmly, and stick to it. I have lost a great deal through my videogaming and lack of self-management, though equally accomplished a great deal in spite of it. Here's hoping with Round Two of Day 1 that I can fine tune the balance between the two to be a little more in my favour. Gratitude journal Ultimately I'm extremely lucky my friends and family have put up with me being a manchild for as long as I have. Or rather more generously for my lack of self-management and the extensive support I've been provided regardless. One amazing thing that happened/I did today My flatmate covered me for three weeks rent because my priorities are out of kilter. Workout/run - Chest day (every day) Meditation I'll try it? Visualisation I need to figure out what this means. Daily affirmation Can Reading + taking notes Just the Respawn and Challenge books tonight, then perhaps leisure reading in bed (screens are now banned) Getting to bed before 9pm Definitely not, woke up at 4pm. But will have a go. Weekly Goal(s) Get a schedule back up and running and follow it daily. Prioritize. No video games whatsover At least 20 total efforts towards employment Gym every day Monthly Goal New job 3 Month Goal Completely quit gaming Completely quit vaping 90kg @ gym Financially stable What went well today: I started. What I could have done to make my day better: Started before waking up at 4pm. What I will do differently tomorrow: Set an alarm, with timers. No phone use in bed from waking, only reading or audiobook. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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