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I relapsed today


BiZark
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About a week and a half ago my girlfriend had reached her limit with me and my gaming addiction. She said she never wanted to argue about gaming ever again, so I told her I would quit and I proceeded to unplug my desktop PC and store it in the closet. Today I downloaded Fortnite on my laptop and played a game and she caught me. I lied to her saying I was just watching a video of it. She knew I was lying about that and was doubly disappointed. 

 

I told her she was right and that I would look for more resources to help me quit. That's when I found this. I haven't found any hobbies to replace the free time yet but I did get hired for a job at Starbucks. 

 

I want to get better but it feels like I have nothing else to do. What do you guys do?

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I'm struggling with urges at the moment as well. I quit 17 days ago.

The first days are a struggle, as you might already know. I started off by agreeing to do anything that my spouse had in mind because she was always suggesting stuff to do when I was still gaming. We went outside for walks, went to the gym and watched movies. I've been also confiding to her about all my feelings about quitting.

Then I started studying (good that you found work, it's gonna be pretty much the most important thing for you) and studies have been the #1 activity that has kept me away from my gaming pc. In addition I picked up guitar again and have been playing around 1-3 hours every day after studies. 

All of this also resulted in a better quality of sleep, which is gonna be your best friend when you are working. 

So I'd suggest getting just one hobby, be it almost anything, alongside your work at the cafe. I can suggest chess, swimming, gym, picking up an instrument (bass,guitar, piano?), podcasts, drawing/graphic design or even programming.

You're already on the right path and you're lucky to have someone who cares about your well-being and is reminding you and having patience with your addiction. I know it can be hard at times to live up to your gf's expectations but you yourself know best if she is right or not. 

I wish an easy recovery for you, you can kick the addiction! I hope this helped :)

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Welcome to the forums. 

There's a lot to unpack in your post, not just for the readers, but for yourself as well. 

Shame is probably the strongest emotion in the world and can lead to both good and bad reactions. Coming here was a good reaction. Beating yourself up over addiction is a bad reaction. Keep that in mind. It sounds obvious but it's easy to look past how we care for ourselves. 

For hobbies you should find out why you're playing video games in the first place. What are you looking for when you play? Then find replacement activities. 

You could yearn for social interaction, progression in something measurable, competitive environments, etc. When you crave a game, welcome the craving and pretend it's your stomach craving dinner. Sure, you could eat candy bars, but you'd feel like shit. If you ate a balanced meal then you'd feel better and be full longer with fewer cravings. 

Try to use that anecdote for game cravings. A balanced life reduces cravings. You'll never escape cravings just like you'll never escape hunger. 

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