Question of the Week: Have you ever tried meditation?
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Never in my life would I expect to find myself on a forum like this but. I guess life truly has no roadmap. I'd normally use an Alias but...seeing as how that usually ends up, I'll keep this personal and use my Real Name only and the names of those if permission if given and I apologize if it's hard to read. I tend awful when writing from the heart at times. With that out of the way, let me introduce myself. I'm Giancarlo. A Highschool Junior In the Big City who's trying to crawl his way out to freedom after realizing what gaming is doing, I started off on PS2 But slowly transitioned to other platforms and stuck as a multi-platformed gamer. I got into gaming at an early age since I lived in a bad neighborhood and my parents feared the worst. I was autistic and back then was often bullied and targeted...so I was kept in a small safe haven of the Nintendo Gamecube and PlayStation 2. The Nights of NSX and Simpsons Home And Run, happy memories of youth and killing time until My Uncle picked me up to visit my grandmother or playing against my cousins until dinner time! It was a time when gaming was that. A Simple game to kill time and then put down. But that's not where my story takes it dark turn. That happens sometime around middle school. This was when my hobby started to turn into the addiction it once was. It was when I was finally allowed to go online and interact with the world. This was the PS3 Era. When Bo1 and CoD MW2 Were the Games to have and own. I was this pudgy and F A T. Kid Growing up, so I was often bullied and left alone. at the time. My Parents finally decided to put the internet into the house for work purposes and by looking up videos online hooked my PS3 Online and Got a Headset from my cousin and soon I was on a fast track to talking and making friends. It felt...nice. Finally being able to hold an actual conversation with someone outside of my Special Ed Classes. Talking about common interests and having good laughs over the smallest and dumbest things...It helped my escape my brutal life in school. My Parents were naturally concerned but my father got into tech and supported it...from 5th Grade to 8th. It was Video Games Every Night and Day. Talking to the Same Peeps and finally feeling greatful. Then...I started to make them my priority. After All. It was just a simple algebra assignment. What's one little missing HW. Thing is. They tend to stack when you look at the long term. Little did I know the first stages were setting in. I became irritable when the internet was down, I stopped leaving the house and just scootering around in the park. I became a couch pillow and liked that way until high school started. I'll skip 9th and 10th Year as they were much of the same but worse...It nearly costed me to be held back and lose my position within my cohort. 11th Grade Year. I found what I thought was fucking impossible. A Girl who actually liked me...for me. I learned alot about putting up a front but...when I was with her. I didn't want to mask up and shield. I wanted to be a naked mind for her, just as she was for me but...gaming after so many years took its toll, I was socially recluse and often ghosted when we chatted on discord. Usually paying attention to a War Thunder Match or CS:GO Match, I was doing what had been done on to me...and little did I know at the time that I was hurting her. I let my internet persona take the lead and act like this giant Brochado, when she loved my sensitive and intelligent side that came and went in flashes. She eventually left me after I caused her "Stress" but we remain close friends. It wasn't until the last few months that I started to realize that I needed to lose the systems as I had bigger dreams. I found a school I wanted to go to (USNA!) but My grades after years of gaming, hold me back and after a heavy conversation with my Ex. I realized something... A Decade in my life was coming back to bite me with no punches pulled...My Safezone was really my Gas Chamber. I was poisoned and living in my own reality instead of being apart of the real world...the world with her, the world where we watched movies, the World where I left and explored New York City. I lived in a Virutal World. Devoid of Life. I need Help. I know what I want out of life...and I don't want to cross the Rubicon and become a shell... I want to fight this and finally be free.
Hello everyone, this is a post I'm asking for life advice and moral advice about making major life decisions and choosing a career. I originally posted this on Reddit on the subreddit r/StopGaming but I'm posting it on Game Quitters to get another perspective and a second consensus. When I was around 17 years old, I fell into a state of hopelessness and depression and not knowing what to do with my life. At this time the prospects for the real world were looking bad for young people in general and I felt a lot of pressure to make major life decisions on what to do with my life video games were a form of escapism for me. Unlike the vast majority of people on Game QuittersI never actually even came close to ever being addicted to video games and even when I was very young (I started playing video games when I was 4 years old) it never became unhealthy. I did play a lot of video games but I still have a life, other hobbies, friends, went outside, and did many different things with my life. I learned many other different skills and had (and still have) many other interests, skills, passions and a life outside of video games and just electronics, distractions, and entertainment in general. But when I was 17 and 18 it was having a negative effect on me to a point where after procrastinating so much and playing video games not because they made me happy but to escape from my anxiety about my future and the many problems in my life I had to deal with I quit video games and uninstalled Steam, uninstalled all of my video games, and I just pulled the plug on it. I did many other things in my life but I needed to figure out my life and to find out what makes me happy. After eliminating so many of my options one thing I have as a special dream would be to at least work for Bioware on at least one Mass Effect game and feel as though I made something artistically significant and important. considered and know I could go through a program on CGMA or CG Spectrum where to go in order to become is to work in commercial art and work as a 3D modeller, animator, character design artist, or environmental artist. I know some genres such as multiplayer games tend to be more addictive but all video games to my knowledge can cause harm to innocent people (correct me if I'm wrong). The problem I have with potentially planning to make a future career change to work in video games is that I feel as though even though video games did have a negative impact on my life at one point even if I end up doing great in life my work in video games will ruin the lives of at least millions of other people (according to the World Health Organizaiton) such including what it once did to me. Not to mention that its' already negatively impacted or ruined the lives of the people on or ruined the lives of the people on r/StopGaming which is a subreddit on Reddit about game addiction and people who want to quit playing video games. Honestly, I wouldn't even consider working in video games if not for the fact that Bioware exists and I feel as though their video games are not just games but tell incredible stories and are very much art. If Bioware were to be shut down, I wouldn't even think about working in the video game industry. Regardless, I want to be fulfilled in my work and a creative endeavor is something I'm considering. It could also be another form of art or writing or I could become an economist instead but regardless I want to do work that will make me happy and have a positive impact on the world. I know the video game industry is not perfect and I read a book from a video game developer with more than 15 years of experience in the video game industry as a game developer and the truth about what it's really like but I feel as though even if I were to only work for like no more than 5 years if I worked on let's say a Mass Effect game or some video game that is artistically significant and pushes the boundaries of technology, art, philosophy, and pushes humanity forward than that to me is worth doing as long as if I do it on moral terms and don't cause unintended (or worse yet intended) harm to innocent people and cause them to become video game addicts. The fact is that video games have caused harm to many people as proven on Game Quitters and I worry that it would be immoral for me to work in video games and that I would just ruin innocent people's live and be responsible for the rampant video game addiction problem we're seeing now in the world. I understand that addictions can form from various other substances and are caused by other mental problems and external problems such as depression, anxiety, traumatic life experiences, and numerous other problems and causes but regardless I am a genuinely good person with a kind heart and if video games really are that bad then I will not become a video game developer. So I am here to ask for honest help and advice on what I should do with my life. Should I become a video game artist and work in video games? Is it morally wrong for me to get into a career in the video game industry as a video game artist? Is it worth it to become a video game artist or just to become a video game developer in general? Are video games bad for humans and unhealthy for everyone? Are video games objectively a waste of time and bad for you? How should I make my decision of whether or not to become a video game artist and work in the video game industry? To everyone here, please give me the best help and advice that you can. I want the truth, thank you! ? TL;DR I am a genuinely good person who once suffered from problems with video games having a negative impact on his life that is now considering becoming a video game artist and work in the video game industry. I feel as though it is morally wrong and that I would contribute to the video game addiction problem we're seeing now and ruin innocent people's lives. I want to be artistically fulfilled and that's why I'm considering doing this. I am looking for advice on whether or not I should become a video game artist and work in the video game industry and the ethics of making that career and major life decision.