This isn't my first time trying this out, but I will try to have write a journal this time since I have 'failed' a lot at quitting gaming.
Today is day 5 of no gaming, and I am currently aiming for a 90 day detox. It's also Saturday, and it's extremely hot and humid out so there isn't much I can do outside.
This morning, I woke up and read comics for an hour. Then I went to the park to read for an hour. It was 8am so everyone at the park had a dog and I thought how nice it would be to have a dog if I didn't have to clean it's poop with my hands. I wish my cat would like going to the park more but sadly he does not.
I've done a few things on my "chores to do this weekend" list that I am supposed to be doing in order to keep myself busy, but honestly, I am really bored. I've been rolling around complaining to my boyfriend about how I want to play video games. My mind has been shooting back and forth between league of legends, dragon age inquisition, and elder scrolls online. Thoughts like "what's the big deal, it's just video games" "don't you think you're trying to be too perfect?" "gaming is not so bad, it's not a real addiction" keep going through my head. I've also noticed that when I quit gaming I tend to try to force myself to do more chores, which may not be the key to success with this.
Things left to do: Laundry, yoga, cleaning, japan trip vacation planning, whole foods shopping, work on writing a short story
Ugh I don't want to do these things. I just want to play as a ice mage or an archer or a holy priest. Why can't I be that in real life?
I wish I had a garden but I live in NYC. I feel like if I had a garden I would not want to play video games as much. But I keep managing to keep bringing back my one plant from the verge of death so I guess that is ok.
Yesterday, I spent some time drawing which is an activity I like. But I don't do it very much anymore because I don't see the point in doing so. No one is really going to see it, and no one will pay money for what I have drawn. This ties back to the sense of accomplishment video games give you and it has me conflicted about drawing. I prefer drawing to writing, but I think I have more of a shot at making money with my writing, and publishing a book is a goal I can work towards and would feel successful at doing. So I am conflicted about that too.
Later today I am going to eat korean bbq and watch the new jason bourne movie after I go grocery shopping. It would be nice to play video games right now but I am going to try not playing them.
This is my current favorite song: https://my.mixtape.moe/albsma.webm