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Day #15/90 Okay, so I got REALLY carried away with time. It's really late and at this rate I'll be up at noon tomorrow... gotta say though, I'm actually glad to say it's because I got so invested in my sprite animation. First time in a long while I'm up this late outside of school due to something other than games. I spent a lot of time today fine tuning my drawing for a painting, and after receiving critique from some peers, I'm on my way to finally applying paint to the project. Just gotta be sure I get some tracing paper and save the drawing in case I screw the painting up. My day kinda ended early due to having to accompany my mother while dropping my uncle off at the airport. Tons of time got sucked out of my day from that but I guess I unhealthily made it up by staying up until 5am... I won't make this a habit. I'll definitely be more on point with my sleep schedule. I'm not sure if this file is too large, but I'll likely post my progress on my sprite animation. Unrusting.mp4 What I'm thankful for: My passion for art never dying down even after experiencing high stress from art school. Goals for Day #16: Walk in the morning... or afternoon. Start underpainting of aforementioned painting project. Continue animating... and don't stay up until 5am doing so.

Day #14/90 2 weeks into the detox, and I gotta say, other than some mild urges to consume game related content, I haven't felt inclined to bring games back into my day to day life. Some of my friends still like talking about gaming with me, but I try not to think much of it. I've been trying to put more time into the projects that I have put off for years now, mostly sprite animation projects. I may or may not show some progress in here sometime, only time will tell. Something I've noticed is my lack of energy might be a result of my diet. I may have dropped video games for a couple weeks now, but my diet is abysmal, and I am about 50 pounds overweight. I am the most out of shape I've ever been in my life, and I know I'm capable of fixing that, but I gotta stop stalling. Today was pretty slow overall, but I am satisfied with the amount of work I got done. The only thing I feel mildly upset about is my lack of initiative in doing research on learning some keyboard. I'm hoping to at least introduce myself to something before my studies start on the 24th. I'd say overall it's been a good day though. Tomorrow will be cut short due to having to stick with my mother while she drops my uncle off at an airport in the evening. I'm going to ensure she doesn't deal with the late night traffic alone. Things I'm thankful for: The internet being an endless resource, especially as an artist trying to find his way. Goals for Day #15: Take the morning walk. Work on portfolio related artwork. Continue animating.

Day #13/90 I spent even more time with the family today, and did some more sketching with a looser approach. I'm so caught up in the idea of a perfect sketch when I should just be enjoying the feeling of putting ink on paper. It's a hard adjustment to make but I think letting go of my perfectionist qualities will improve my skills, as counterintuitive as that feels... I worked a good amount on my animation work today, so that was neat. Didn't really feel the painting projects today, but that's alright. What I'm thankful for: The cold weather. Bundling up is great. Goals for Day #14: Another walk in the morning. Continue animation projects. Continue painting projects. Start doing some research on beginner keyboard lessons. Gonna try a new hobby.

Day #12/90 Had a change of plans and ended up spending time with just my sister. We drove out a couple hours to a mall and I spent some time with her at an arcade and walking around the mall. We went to an Italian place and had some pasta. Afterwards we spent some time at home watching random videos together. Seems like she wants to make the most of my last days here at my mother's place, and I'm more than happy to oblige. Did a bit of sketchbooking, but not a lot; I'm finding myself getting too caught up in the process and I really need to loosen up more. What I'm thankful for: Music Goals for Day #13: Take a walk in the morning. Work on some more portfolio related artwork. Work on some personal artwork for fun.

Day #11/90 I met up with an old friend of mine I haven't caught up with in over a year. We spent the majority of today walking, running, and talking to one another about a ton of things. Im exhausted, we definitely went over the 7 mile mark today, with breaks. He brought me over to his place and then we went to a local deli to eat some sandwiches together. We were reminiscing a lot, talking about our years in high school among many other things. It was a great time. It felt nice being outside for that long, after being holed up indoors for far too long. I got to work on some artwork when I got home, and here I am now still doing that as I type this entry. Tomorrow my family is going out of town, so I'm going to plan on bringing some art supplies and do some studies while we're out and about. I enjoyed today for sure. Things I'm thankful for: My vision. I definitely love being able to see the beauty of my surroundings. Goals for Day #12: Spend quality time with the family and get some sketchbooking done!

I don't quite have a strategy to address this sensation yet. However I do know the moment my body touches my bed, I feel like I'm being sucked into a void, so I'll probably try and be more conscientious about the simple decision of laying in bed for "just 5 minutes."

Day #10/90 I got to walk for a long amount of time today, alongside a friend of mine who went down the same journey of quitting games. We spent the entire time talking about how we want to live our lives and what it is we're both doing to try and get there. I would say he's the friend who understands my current journey most out of all my friends, and I really appreciate him for his guidance throughout the years. Afterwards, I spent time with my sister and a friend of hers, just having a good time eating and being out and about. My sister told me that she wanted to spend the final days of my break with me so I spent most of today doing so. Plans have also changed regarding my departure from my mother's place, and I'll be sticking around a little longer before having to go back to my place near campus. Although I didn't get to work on hardly any artwork today, I would still call today highly productive. I got to spend a lot of time self-reflecting and bouncing those ideas off a friend. I'd say it was a very insightful day, and I look forward to seeing how much I'll transform over the course of this year. I'd say it was a good day. What I'm thankful for: My warm clothes Goals for Day #11: Run with a friend of mine at a trail nearby. Continue working on portfolio related artwork. Break the ice with certain peers and do some art alongside them; start being plugged into a community outside of video games.

Day #9/90 The course of today was altered compared to the goals set by yesterday, but not in a negatively impactful way. I spent some time with a friend, watched a movie, and we actually ran/walked together, so that was good. We got to eat some food and then when I got back home I took a nap. I'm planning my return to the house really close to my college campus, despite not having to start until the 24th. I want to get accustomed to the day to day life again living all the way out there, especially while I'm trying to build these new habits. I'm hoping that the changes that I have attempted to make this Winter Break, despite not having been subjected to them for very long, will show some form of positive impact on the overall trajectory of this upcoming semester. Last semester was a trainwreck, and video games have been one of the main culprits of that failure. In any case, I'm going to enjoy my final days resting here at my mother's place and start getting into the proper headspace for another intense semester of my art studies. Wish me luck! What I'm thankful for: Having upperclassmen roommates that are of the same major, directly involved with my progress. It's a blessing I'm not sure many share with me. Goals for Day #10: Do some exercise in the morning (walking/running) Start packing up clothes and other belongings I intend to bring to my house near campus. Continue working on my artwork.

I know it's been a while, but I've been thinking about how rude it was of me to not ask you the same. I'm actually very curious about your own aspirations in this creative field! And if you have any work, I'd love to see it. Thank you again for showing interest in my own creative endeavors.

Day #8/90 Probably the worst day I've had in terms of productivity. Most of my day was spent in bed, watching anime... definitely not the ideal way I wanted to spend time. I had little to no energy to leave my room, and I just felt a stuck sensation the entire time. However, I don't feel terrible about how today went, mostly because I think about the fact I'm on Winter Break, and when I'm actually dealing with my semesters, it's absolute hell dealing with the workload. I beat myself up enough during those semesters so the best thing I can do now is try and wake up earlier, since I've experienced more productive days on average when I wake up at 7-8am. In hindsight it's likely that if I put in a tiny bit more effort and fought this inert feeling to take a walk, the day could've looked much different. Things I'm thankful for: The fact I feel clear about my direction and actually have a goal Goals for Day #9: Take a walk, first thing in the morning. Kickstart the day properly. Actually send that aforementioned email... Work on the cone/prism painting, get feedback! Instead of filling my idle hours with binging anime, work on my character ref sheet instead.

Thank you for the kind words. I'm sure that once I reach a level of investment in other avenues of my life, things will be fine!

Day #7/90 Probably the most uneventful day I've had since starting this journal. The entire day was spent going back home, and settling back into my home. Not much to say here, other than the fact I wish I didn't sleep as much as I did on the way back, because I'm gonna struggle with sleep tonight. But yeah, not much of anything at all! We'll see how tomorrow turns out. What I'm thankful for: My taste buds Goals for Day #8: Send out an email regarding my on campus job this upcoming semester. Continue working on my cone/prism painting project for my portfolio review. Do some form of exercise, just get started on something. Continue reference sheet for my character. If true boredom occurs, embrace the feeling and understand it.

Day #6/90 Honestly, today kind of sucked. There was a lot of arguing and negative energy being thrown around the family and I spent the majority of my time trying to shut everything out, unable to enjoy my experiences here in Vegas. I got to try a burger from Gordon Ramsay burger and it was quite delicious. Other than that the rest of my experiences were a blur due to me trying to tune out. Well, there was one thing I got to do, and it was go visit the local Blick store. I finally managed to get my hands on a couple tubes of yellow gouache paint, so at least I found some joy in buying some new supplies. I spent some time today reflecting on some of my anxieties when it comes to the challenge of cutting off video games from my life. As of right now, I know for a fact there's no new content for any of the titles I was previously heavily invested in (Overwatch, Risk of Rain 2, Smash Ultimate), but I've never had to deal with the phenomenon known as "FoMO". I really want to stay away from video games but I'm worried I won't have the willpower to push away the need to experience all that new content. I won't be actively seeking it but I know that some people I'm connected with might be inclined to speak of it in my presence, and I'm not entirely sure what to do in that circumstance other than not further enable that discussion. There's still time for me to do some painting before I go to bed, so it's probably in my best interest to distract myself with that to keep my mind off the aforementioned anxieties of mine. What I'm thankful for: Being able to break through another layer of the emotional trauma my father caused me by admitting I have an issue with video games in the first place. Goals for Day #7: Relax and feel as comfortable as possible on my way back home from Vegas. Get well rested for the following day.

I'm currently alone in the hotel room. I wanted to type this out before it escapes my mind, but I've slowly come to realize that the next thing that I need to do is reduce my screen time throughout the day. I've been partially successful with taking the idle time created from not playing video games and using it productively, but half the time I fall into the trap of overstimulating my mind with my phone. Although I've avoided gaming content, I realize the act of constantly scrolling through content is killing not only my time, but my feeling of being present at the moment. The feeling of being disconnected from my surroundings because I'm connected to my device is such a dull feeling, and makes my mood plummet. I'm typing this after binging social media content as we speak. I'm going to take this moment of clarity and put my phone down to try and read or paint, but I'm also going to be sure I don't beat myself up if I don't manage to get those things done. I'm going to set the simple goal of simply doing anything that isn't doomscrolling, even if it's absolutely nothing.

Day #5/90 Man. I'm exhausted. Entire day was spent walking around the strip. We went to an indoor amusement park in Circus Circus but the prices were too high so we opted out of partaking in that activity, unfortunately. I don't gamble or drink so I kinda just observed for the most part. It was pretty fun though. Ate some ramen today, and it was great. I usually order tonkotsu ramen at the highest spice level they offer, with extra noodles and an extra egg. I got a few really fast sketches done while we were out there. Super unfinished sketches but it's hard to study an area for a while when we're constantly on the move. Today was quite eventful. If tomorrow ends up being the same way, I have a feeling I won't have any time for painting! What I'm thankful for: Being able to walk. Sounds weird, but I was thinking a lot about how much I take my locomotion for granted. Goals for Day #6: Same as yesterday!

Day #4/90 I spent most of my day traveling out to Las Vegas, so not a lot happened. Got some sleep, tried to read a book in the ride over, walked around the casino, and am now laying in bed. I got my painting station setup though, so I did fulfill my goal! What I'm thankful for: Not getting sick today! Goals for Day #5: Enjoy my weekend in Vegas! Potentially do some sketches/start a painting!

Gouache paints are like more opaque watercolors, and with how much pigment you use you can get really solid colors. Oftentimes I struggle to layer gouache since new layers reactivate older ones, mixing into each other. I'll get used to it again.

Gouache! And thank you, I look forward to doing more!

I appreciate your responses throughout this thread a lot! I try not to think much of what they have to say, and although a lot of time hasn't passed yet, I feel blessed to not feel stumped in what I should be doing with all this empty time, since the arts were in the backburner for so long. I can't wait to grow and hone my craft! But yeah, I try my best to take everything they have to say with a grain of salt. At the end of the day, they all come from a good place, but I know that some will simply not fully understand my decision, and that's okay!

Day #3/90 Day 3! The majority of my day was spent outside, spending time with a friend of mine. Although I enjoyed my time, I also feel the need to make my boundaries clear the next time I visit him, and I'm talking about what I'm trying to accomplish in giving up video games. The plan was for us to go on a walk, get some food and watch an MCU film together, and that would be it. However, he ended up playing rocket league for a while in his living room, while I sat there and watched. I didn't have it in me to let him know that I would prefer we stray away from game-related activity when we're together, but it's on me I suppose for not making that clear when I told him I wanted to quit gaming for good. Luckily for me, this didn't really spark any urges, because rocket league was never a title I cared about anyway, I found the game rather boring, so I continued on with my day after we watched the film and I got back home. My plans were a bit sidetracked since my sister's friend came over, and I ended up spending time with them. We went out to eat, came back home, sat down and talked at length about various things, but I was tuned out for the most part, at that point my social battery was pretty drained, and I was getting tired, but they both understood that and let me be. On another note, I purchased a keyboard from that same friend! I decided one of the hobbies I want to pick up alongside art is learning an instrument, and I have always wanted to learn how to play piano. I've had keyboards in the past, but video games always distracted me from learning anything new, so I'm hoping that under these entirely new conditions, I can foster an environment that will encourage me to learn something new! Tomorrow, I'm headed to Las Vegas with my family over the weekend, so that should be a good time. I intend to bring all my painting supplies and digital projects. I am mildly concerned to be in another environment where my sister and a friend will be playing video games in the hotel room, but I talked them into bringing things like board games so all the time spent inside our room wouldn't just be gaming. Hopefully by bringing all my painting supplies and some books, I'll be able to keep myself on track with my productivity. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to finish my still-life painting today, but I did get close. I'll upload a photo shortly of what I have, along with photo reference (note that the photo reference was taken at a slightly different perspective, so it might look a bit off). A few things that I feel I could've done was include more shadow values to push that contrast on the mango, along with some transitions and reflected light on the mango, but I've always struggled with transitional values from shadow to light, and end up overpowering the subject with large amounts of light or shadow value. I'm not too upset about this gouache painting however, since it's the first one in basically an entire year. I'll be doing more artwork and posting here! What I'm thankful for: The excess art supplies that ended up being a blessing instead of dead $$$ Goals for Day #4: Honestly, it's going to be a long trip to Vegas. My simple goal is to find an area in the hotel room I can use as my art corner and set it up before our weekend starts!

Day #2/90: For only being day 2 of my detox, it only makes sense that I haven't felt any strong urges to game yet. I did however finally spend 3 hours on my still-life mango painting today! It's nearly finished, but gouache paints are quite difficult to work with. Other than that, I spent time with my mother running errands, which was perfect for when I was starting to get bored and holed up at home. I'm hoping to remedy this issue in the future by starting an exercise regime. I have been so inert at home and during my art studies, that it has definitely taken a toll on my well-being as a whole. I intend to do walks every morning at minimum, and potentially start running again. I used to be a semi-serious runner when I was much younger, running up to 16 miles at a consistent 12 minute mile pace with no breaks. I am nowhere near that level of fitness, and I would even say I'm the most out of shape I have been in my life. At the very least, I wanna challenge myself to start running again after doing some walking for a while. As for the more relevant note regarding my decision to quit games, the end of today showed a lot of mixed response regarding my decision from my peers and family. The most important thing to note is that my mother fully supports and understands my decision, and is willing to do everything she can to help me get through this difficult time in my life. I've had a good number of supportive peers, and ones who poured their heart out to let me know how proud they are of me for taking such a huge step. I've also had some responses from friends who told me to not fully quit, and that I should simply just moderate my hours, even having one response with slight undertones of shaming and slighting me. In any case, one thing nobody can take from me is that this is my decision, and it wasn't one I made overnight. Years of contemplation and denial have led up to the circumstances that are currently at play. We'll see how far I go! What I'm thankful for: Having a roof over my head My highly supportive mother Having a tight-knit art community at my school that also support my struggle Goals for Day #3: Spend some quality time with a friend outside of gaming. Finish my mango-still life and start a new painting! Potentially continue my ref sheet for my Kirby fan character, Aperture.

Oh wow, it's nice to meet a fellow animator! Honestly, I grew up watching shonen anime and flash animations on the internet growing up, and it has drawn me into the world of animation, more than likely action and effects in the long run! I also have some surrounding interests that I've acquired as I studied in my art program, including painting in gouache and acrylics! I don't have a clear, concise idea of what I want to be once I get through my art studies, but I intend to explore my options as I get more exposed to different parts of the creative pipeline! I more than likely will work in character animation, whether it be 2d or 3d.

Good afternoon, thank you for the comment. I have the same concerns you do, actually. Before I actually committed to deleting everything, I told my family and friends about my plans, and some of them strongly urged me not to delete things. My sister being a gamer wanted the games I had sitting in my library, and some of my friends wanted to "preserve" the accounts. Quite frankly I was a bit taken aback from these responses, but I didn't think much of them at the time. In any case, I definitely do have concerns about my steam account still existing, even though I told my sister that it's not mine and to treat the account as if it were her own. But yes, thank you for your concerns, they definitely echo my own.

Day #1: Today marks the first day I write about my attempt to rid my life of video games. I spent today removing my steam, epic games, and battle net accounts, whether it was through deletion or handing it off to my sister, for good. I also cleaned up my YouTube of all gaming content and kept all the art content that I actively used during my semesters in my art program. The difficult thing about me committing to removing video games from my life is that my chosen future career path is so closely intertwined with the usage of computers, and may even potentially dip into the realm of video games. What I hope I'm able to do is delineate playing video games versus making art for any game related content down the line. Preventing myself from homogenizing the act of playing games vs making game-related artwork seems like the true challenge I'll be going through in the long run, but I definitely don't think it's impossible. Ultimately, the goal right now is to not play a video game for 90 days, so I'll stick to worrying about that. If I can pull that off then I think I'm capable of more than I give myself credit for. As for the overall structure of this journal, I'll have to decide what I want to add to my daily entries without overwhelming myself with too much, so this first entry will be a lot more informal than future intended entries. Thank you.

Hey everyone, my name is Rick. I'm 23 years old and am currently studying to become a professional animator. Since I was very young (5-6 years old), video games have been a huge part of my life, and I have poured endless hours into competitive games, even having attended tournaments consistently throughout the years. I grew up with a father who scorned me in a highly vitriolic fashion when it came to my video game addiction, making it very hard for me to open up to others about the prospect of being addicted to gaming, since I didn't want people to feel disgusted and leave me. As time went on however, I have realized that people are far kinder than I have given them credit for, and today marked the first time I have ever admitted to anybody that I am addicted to video games. It was apparent for a long while that I spent more time on video games than I should have (throughout high school, I played Smash for hours on end, sometimes staying up til' late, it's a coincidence that I was able to graduate with really good grades), but now that I'm in a notoriously difficult art program and am living a more independent college lifestyle, my gaming habits have caught up to me and have had adverse effects on my academic performance. Granted, gaming isn't the sole reason my art studies have taken a critical hit, but I would say they're a large contributor. I lied to my peers and family at times about how much I gamed out of shame, trying to put on the appearance of a disciplined student, when in reality I was someone who lacked the willpower to avoid heavy indulgence on a daily basis, to the point it affected my day to day life. My dream in the long term is to be a professional artist toward some capacity; I want to work in professional animation studios and get my foot in the door, but I know for a fact that I can't make it happen if I continue to allow video games to take control of my life. And right now especially, I am approaching the most crucial point of my art studies, in which I need to submit a portfolio of my best work to see if they'll allow me to continue studying under their program, or if they'll throw me out entirely. Regardless of whether or not I end up being removed from my art program, I still want to commit to leaving video games entirely, as I truly believe they have been a huge contributor to my current set of circumstances. There's a lot more I could get into, but I figured I would shed some light on my own situation a bit. This just about summarizes what I've been going through lately. Thank you for taking the time to read.