Josephh

Day 57: It’s been about a month since I last updated. As you can gather from my last few entries, I have been working on some various projects over the past few weeks. This will be a longer entry than usual since I’ll just be using this time to recap what I’ve done over the past few weeks. Firstly, I found a place. Already signed the lease agreement some several days ago. I move in just a few days before school starts at the very beginning of September. I’m stressed and nervous. There was a whole lot of things I have to consider when it comes to searching for the right place – does the place leak? Do I know my rights as a tenant? – but that was the least of my worries. The other issue involves what happens next after. Could I balance school work with life outside of it? This includes possibly working part-time, getting involved in many things on-campus, making some new friends in the process… Plus be able to take care of myself and be more responsible for my actions during this process? As I have stated many entries ago, I go to a school that is very intensive in terms of its workload (in fact it is a top-ranked institution in the world – if for whatever reason those rankings matter to you); it also doesn’t participate in grade inflation like many other schools I know. So it’s actually pretty easy to fall behind in terms of school work if I’m not careful – which is why I need to take these things into consideration. It has its pros and cons – just like any other college or university that would have served as other options for me anyways. There will always be options regardless of if I don’t do well in school – but I feel like it would help regardless if I can do well in school while also putting priority on these other issues that concern me as of right now in regards to living on my own. Anyways, I’ve continued my driving lessons. I’ve picked up on my driving skills quite a bit. I can drive much more confidently now and with ease. I still need to practice my parking. Besides that I have a lot of the basics down and I can pretty much drive to a lot of different places that I’d like to go within the city (if not the highways/freeways). I still need a few more practice sessions – but afterwards I should be able to do the driving examination which will allow me to upgrade my license and get more driving privileges. Summer school had finished not too long ago. I got a 78% overall. Not too bad I guess and it is within my expectations. I’m hoping, although maybe not expecting considering how I’ll have to adjust to my future environment, that I can improve on that performance once school starts again in the Fall, albeit with more courses that I’ll be taking. I’ve only finished 5 books so far out of the 25 I’ve set as a goal for myself by the end of the year. A few were books I had to read for school anyways. Still have not finished The Powers of Habit, I must admit. I should have some time tomorrow to get this done since things have died down a bit and I can have a moment to work on some other things I wanted to get done.

Day 34: Sorry it’s been a while. I’ve been doing some things. The search for a new place has been stressful. I’m not used to this at all… and it’s all just slightly more than a month before school starts (but technically I’m aiming for the 1st of the month, because that’s how these things should go). I have a whole bunch of stuff prepared at least, and I've already looked at a bunch of places... but maybe I’m just too worried about certain things like living in something rundown, or living with terrible roommates… I don’t necessarily know what to do should I end up in such situations in the first place, even if I do my best to prevent them. My problem is that I don’t exactly have many friends that I can turn to who might refer me to something… let alone anybody I know that at the moment is looking for roommates or looking for a place like me (which at the same time is exactly why I want to do this because I feel like it'll introduce me to more new people and more new friends that I otherwise would have trouble making due to my awkward scheduling at the moment). Budgeting is also a concern, though I think I should have enough to cover for enough adequacies, obviously I’m not going to live luxuriously. I’ve been trying to look up some information as much as I can – although I wonder if this is just an instance of me thinking about this too much and if I should just really take the plunge and go for whatever at first glance is interesting. I might be overthinking this too much, I don’t know. But hopefully I’ll get something. It won’t be the end of the world if I don’t, but I feel like by having to take this hour and a half commute everyday (3 hours total per day counting the return trip), it will hinder me from living the kind of life that I want to live and will prevent me from pursuing the things I want to do for this school year and in upcoming years. I want to seize that opportunity if I can do so. I’ve been learning driving in the meanwhile. I’m getting better at it – I’m driving on the main roads now. I’m still getting used to lane changing and so forth. Learning about a ton of other things about driving – which I’ll be continuing to do tomorrow and on Monday too. Also continuing to focus on my studies for this summer, so there’s that. My assignment is due soon, and not too long later there will be an exam. I’m getting an 84% in the class thus far. Works if I'm only taking this one class over the summer, but with the way things are right now I don't think I can manage a full course load at this same pace (though I'll be damned if I don't at least try). Anyways, that’s all I can say at this point. I know I had a bunch of projects I wanted to do that I’ve planned from earlier journal entries – and I hope to do them at some point, but right now I have quite a bit on my plate. Hopefully this will be just another phase and that things will fall in place for me, but as of right now I can only hope that I’m just building this up too much in my head and that everything will be fine.

That’s kind of the takeaway that I’m getting as well in regards to driving – the more I practice those skills, the easier it will be for me. This goes for lots of other things too besides driving. =P Day 27: I’ve been learning about driving the past two days mostly. The driving lessons went well overall. I have some basic feeling of how to operate a car, although mainly under residential roads still. I’m making some mistakes still, obviously (for example, I nearly hit a parked car while I was turning on a curve in the road), though there’s a reason why I have a driving instructor by my side. I’m also learning the three-point turn, which I’ll probably get more practice on soon enough. I never realized how tiring driving can get – especially when it comes to getting a feeling for the brakes for acceleration, etc. But after all, these are habits that will only develop over time for me – as is the case for everyone else who can drive already. I’ve also been learning how to operate under certain conditions while on the road, generally about when I’m at intersections involving stop signs and traffic signals and etc. It was difficult to learn all these rules; both when I’m hearing it for the first time and when I’m actually practicing them. Anyways, I’ll definitely be continuing more of that later on without question, while at the same time also focusing on other projects and priorities.

Day 25: Just received a lot of information regarding renting, since it’s already too late to look into on-campus living. Quite a lot of information to look over – things regarding what to look for when renting, potential scams, what landlords should be doing, other legal things and so forth. It does appear that I’m also on the right timing when it comes to looking for a place, according to those I’ve spoken to. It’s still a bit nerve-wracking though, because I don't know what's going to happen, but I aim to follow through on this. I now have the right resources to begin my search. I’ve also scheduled some more driving lessons for tomorrow and on Saturday as well, though Saturday will be more lecturing rather than practice.

Day 24: Registration for courses just happened. I missed out on a couple of my first options. Oh well. I still had back-ups which I was able to take. I’ve got a solid selection of courses that I’ll be looking forward to coming this upcoming year. I’ve spent the past two days working on school and that assignment, so I don’t have anything else to add. I got my essay back – it’s a 78%, which isn’t too bad and is slightly above my expectations. I’m aiming for something close to that amount (or maybe even better) for this next assignment. I always generally have a sense of skepticism and slight nervousness over what will happen though with every assignment I hand in (although it’s probably a healthy sense of skepticism, it’s not like it affects me THAT badly). It’ll also be quite busy for me the next few days with learning driving and sorting other things out, which I’ll probably try to update you guys more frequently on as those days come.

Day 22: I’ve been a bit busy today. I’ve mostly been studying for school – and then going to class, which explains why I’m staying up a bit later than usual to post this journal entry. But anyways: Besides the usual, I’m aiming to start driving lessons again sometime this week, maybe on this Friday or Saturday, or even both depending on how much time I have. An assignment has been handed out in class that will be due in a couple weeks’ time. On top of that, registration for upcoming courses for the school year will be coming soon which I want to make time for in order to prepare my selections. I’m continuing to do further research into living independently on my own, although I haven’t progressed much from the last time around. There are events on campus in the upcoming few days and weeks that are all about gathering information and speaking to people (including landlords) regarding this stuff, so I hope to take advantage of those at some point. The more I think about it, the more inclined I feel about making this decision and the more I hope I won’t be too late to make that decision when school comes again starting this fall.

Day 19: Over the past few days, besides school work I have mostly been trying to prepare for the next upcoming school year as well. I’ve mostly been running around gathering information regarding finances and have been doing a lot of research on living independently, whether it be on campus or somewhere close. I felt that if there’s any time to do this kind of thing, it might as well be now, since any later will probably be a bit too late to make any decisions regarding my living arrangements. I’ve already spoken to plenty of people (my parents and those working for the college) regarding this decision. I still have quite a bit to do in that regard, and I need time to think more about this as to me this is a pretty difficult decision – so we’ll see until then. I still have a few people I might need to talk to on those matters. It doesn’t seem like my parents will be on vacation after all (as I’ve stated many entries ago), the plans have changed a bit for reasons I won’t discuss here. Though if I am to continue down the path I have described, I will have to learn cooking at some point. I’ll probably do it later on when I am used to all this and I can have a moment to do so. I do currently feel a bit of stress so far, as I haven’t yet realized the massive responsibility that I will be undertaking. I do believe though that this is just a testing ground for what I’ll have to be doing at some point in my life anyways – especially if I can fit in all of these activities and tasks into one schedule. As long as I can keep a habit of doing all these things I don’t think it’ll be that hard – considering how everyone else is doing all of these things at once anyway. At this point video games are kind of out of the question considering what I’m aiming to do within the next few months. I haven’t been thinking about them at all. I've mostly been thinking about acquiring a certain kind of freedom - whether it be intellectual freedom via the pursuit of learning (including being in an institution like a college/university that will guide me in doing so), the freedom to go out and make my own decisions and take on certain responsibilities for myself, including the freedom away from video games, and much more.

Day 17: My essay has now been handed in class today, hopefully it’ll at least be decent. Also have some more driving lessons scheduled for some time next week provided that nothing else comes up then. I could’ve had it this week, but my instructor isn’t in this weekend and the next couple of days are a bit busy for me. I’ve been trying to squeeze in quite a lot into my schedule lately… the commute to school, the other school work I have to do, the exercising (which admittedly I’m doing some, but not quite on top of like before only because of what I'm currently prioritizing at the moment - the hot weather outside doesn’t help either. But I'm definitely working on it) and the driving lessons on top of that AND even more. It’s been a little crazy for me trying to juggle all of these things at once – but I think in due time it will settle down a bit for me.

Is there an Android version of the app? I know there's one for the iOS - but a search found nothing. I might look for similar apps though. Thanks for the suggestion. Day 15: I skipped a journal entry yesterday by my intention, as I only aim to write down things that I thought were interesting – or things that I would look to as progress besides redundancy. Though I was doing quite a lot of studying and writing both yesterday and today – in fact I just finished my essay which is due next class. Just need to look it over now. A second assignment will arrive soon enough that I will have to do as well (although in both of these cases they don’t require THAT much writing anyways due to the time constraints of being in a summer course, so it also makes that a bit easier if still pretty intensive). In all honesty, it looks like for the next couple of days at least I may need to do a lot of focusing on school since the workload is now starting to get a bit more intense. I’ll have to put off or at least delay a few things in the meanwhile. (I hadn’t touched The Power of Habit since a few days ago – I would really like to finish that book.) Once things settle down a bit I will probably look to do other things.

Thank you. Day 13: In my attempt to go to bed earlier than usual, I’m also posting this journal entry earlier than usual. It does however lead to the consequence of having a bit less to report on only because my day has gotten a bit shorter. Regardless, I attended my first driving class today. I was given a basic review of some of the signs, the traffic laws & regulations that I had to pay attention to. Some were self-explanatory, and others were things that I probably had forgotten about prior to beginning these lessons (the first driver’s exam I did was about a few years back just to obtain the license; I hadn’t done anything else since to upgrade it). I was taught some basic techniques of driving like threshold braking, the proper way to steer (9 and 3), etc. Overall it went well for a first time and wasn’t quite as intimidating as I thought it could be – what’s next really is to practice and practice so that I can get the hang of it before I move on to the next thing (with someone who has enough experience to supervise me obviously - probably one of my parents, as is required by law until I gather enough experience and pass all the tests to upgrade my current license). Anyways, there’s that. For tomorrow my primary focus will be on my studies – I’m going to continue working on the essay that is due next week.

Watched that video. Made some pretty good suggestions in regards to goal setting which I will be sure to implement the next time around. Thanks! Day 12: I spent most of my day with family. Hadn't gotten too much done otherwise (and this technically includes another day without games anyways) - but I'm still doing my exercising. I'm also attempting to aim for the next week (or so if I can) to not jump to the computer every time I wake up and to actually set on a routine first of brushing my teeth, eating breakfast, etc. I've been able to do that starting today. Tomorrow is my first day of driving lessons. I will be sure to look forward to those.

Day 11: In my attempts to try to fill in my Internet time-wasting with things that are more productive, I’ve been watching YouTube videos that are more of the educational type (science channels like PBS Space Time and VSauce… because that stuff is awesome and I would never give that up for the world). I did a little bit of review of some of the material I learned in school as well. I’ve been reading through a lot of the others’ journals lately. I’m hoping that by reading these journals it will also give me some inspiration, insight into how I can improve myself as well as what other things I could improve and should be writing down in my journals as well. I do find one common theme in each of these journals (of success stories) I’ve been reading is the setting up of goals. Admittedly I’ve never really thought about adding such goals, especially when they’re measurable objectives in a quantifiable sense. So in terms of these goals… I know I have an essay due next week, alongside driving school over this weekend and possibly some time to focus on learning cooking 2 weeks from now (just so that I can force myself to do so with my parents away), so I have those to look forward to, but besides that, in terms of stuff I want to do by the end of the summer… - I’ve set up a goal to try to read 25 books by the end of this year. I’ve already read The Slight Edge & am about to finish The Power of Habit, so afterwards that makes 23 more to go. I’m aiming that by the time summer has ended I will be halfway through that goal. - I’m looking to get at least a B (or around that, at least 70+) overall in this class I’m taking. - I would like to engage myself in some volunteering in an activity or for an organization/cause I am interested in before the Fall semester of school starts. I haven’t really thought about what this would be yet though – but I aim to think this over the next few days when my mind isn’t on so many things at once. Hopefully by then I'll know what that will be. - I may set up something similar to usernameforworldpeace! when he did his challenges for conquering his social anxiety - I've been having trouble with that in some parts.

Day 10: This might be my shortest journal entry yet, which is a break from the long essay-like entries that I often post. I try to keep it as concise as I can for those who read this stuff because I also value your time as well, though I’m one of those types of people who enjoys writing stuff if only for the fact that it helps to clarify my thoughts and gives me a stress release of sorts. Besides class today and a few other errands I hadn’t done much else, although technically that alone already occupied most of my day. It’s kind of a routine that I’ve already set in at this point. But it’s also another day in which I hadn’t touched anything gaming-related, nor did I even feel the urge to. So I guess that’s a good thing.

Oh, I don't want to give the impression that I'm not listening or that I'm not considering anyone else's opinions/perspectives, because I definitely am. I try to be open to criticism and feedback and I appreciate it whenever people even take the time to read this journal at all and post here in this topic. I wouldn't even post a journal here otherwise. =P (And thank you)

True, it may be an excuse, but I feel like it does require some great time management skills in order to do something like this which I am not the best at... Trying to schedule things that way can be difficult when the things you're interested in doing may not align well with that schedule (and when you could be busy anyways). I also tend to think of it as redundant to do tasks like being in the library unless I really have to, since I already somewhat have a place at home to study. In some way I still feel like that time is a waste, and I'm not sure how to go about convincing myself that it isn't. But regardless... I also completely forgot about audiobooks for some reason. Yeah, I'll definitely be looking into those. Day 9: I’ve been able to keep a consistent exercise routine going for a while now, with mostly running and some stretching here and there and all that. Besides school, watching a movie (Spectre) and some business to take care of today (like further arrangements for driving lessons, to which I’ve already set up the schedule for and have received information for, alongside some tools for preparation and etc.), I’m more than halfway through The Power of Habit now. I find it insightful, especially when it goes into detail about concepts like keystone habits and small wins (and how something insignificant can spark big changes in other aspects) and so forth. The Alcor story so far is my favorite story of the bunch, only simply because I’m drawn to its subtleties of how a change in habits that don’t seem relevant at all to anything actually end up being way more connected to the larger goal than you think. The author brings up many similar examples of this happening in individuals as well, which I think is intriguing to think about especially for many cases you see here on the forum (including my own). My cravings for video games are mostly gone right now, and my activity on gaming forums has almost ceased for the most part - though on occasion I still resort to brainless Internet surfing. I am glad, however, that it has at least gotten to this point and that my circumstance right now isn't as bad as it could've been. I still think about the many lessons that I've learned thus far from reading books like The Slight Edge and The Power of Habit, of which some of this information I am already trying to apply to many aspects of my life. Hopefully in the near future when the situation arises I can fully utilize this knowledge to the best of my abilities.

That is kind of what I already do, although the motion sickness gets to me sometimes so I end up not doing as much as I would like besides the music. It does make planning for a lot of things difficult when it takes that long just to get to where you want to be. Last year I even had to drop a course - because lectures would only run for one hour each day and it would be my only class whereas the commute is three hours total.

Alright, will do! But in the meanwhile: Day 8: I've been preparing a bit for class today which I attended, so there’s that. I haven’t really had much time to do anything else though. I wasn’t really able to read much of The Powers of Habit this time around. It takes about an hour and a half through public transportation to get to school one-way, then back (so 3 hours total). This plus the lecture occupies a huge chunk of my day. Trying to go for a dorm room on campus is really freaking expensive, but yet I’m currently really considering the option of possibly moving to somewhere closer to campus so that my commute time will be cut much shorter. I think it will also be a lot easier for my mental and physical well-being, as I can use the gym closer to campus that I’m already paying for, as well as not having to surround myself in a somewhat dreadful environment that is public transport ALL the time. I also think the change in scenery might shift my bad habits a little bit. Learning about how habits work; I would always be playing games in my room, so it makes it difficult to study or do other important things in my life when my bedroom itself is a cue for the habit of playing video games, which is something I'm definitely going to pay attention to and be more careful of. Also it will be a lot easier to meet other people and make new friends. But I don’t know, we’ll see. I’m also trying to readjust my sleeping habits especially during these past few days. Currently I fall asleep at around 1 – 1:30 am, whereas before I would stay up until past 3 am (sometimes close to 4 am) simply so I could play more games. I’m simply trying to fall asleep as early as I can (without it being too early). Tomorrow I will have to get started on my essay that was just recently assigned in class. Hopefully I don’t procrastinate myself out of it. =P

Day 7: I continued reading further into The Power of Habit. Some very interesting observations that can be applied to all different kinds of fields. It’s definitely something that maybe I should look into further when it comes to finding other things to replace the habit of playing video games – using the cue and reward I get from them but changing the routine so that I’m really doing something else that is more important. While I’m doing a bunch of different things, I don’t exactly know long-term if I am doing the right things. I played video games in the first place really due to boredom, and later on in order to escape from a lot of the issues that I had going on with my life. Also, now that I’ve stopped, I still kind of crave that similar stimulation. Studying is a chore, reading is still something I have to force myself to do. But I wonder if after some time I may figure this out and it will be a lot different. (Also, those personal issues are a lot more magnified from my perspective now that I’ve stopped. I will address them further into this entry.) I can also see where Cam is coming from when it comes to setting up Game Quitters – the 90 day detox that is much like AA’s 90 days of meetings, the community-like environment that AA and Game Quitters both offer as well as other slight similarities. Anyways, besides the usual I also scheduled some driving lessons for myself. I’ve never really quite learned how to drive before, and so I’m going to begin starting next weekend. It does kind of bring me to my own issues and kind of how far behind I feel in comparison to others, even in spite of the fact that it isn’t really a healthy thing to do and I always tell myself that. I guess I would blame some of that on video games most definitely – if I were wired differently I don’t think I’d have the same issues that I have right now (of being social, of progressing in life at the same pace as others, etc.). Most of the people around my age whom I know already have quite a lot of experience with driving (alongside the fact that many of them have graduated from college and are well on their way to forming their own lives while I’m not there as of yet). But I guess another part of video games also is the competitive aspect of it, which I guess translates to reality as well. Either way, it’s only something which I can dwell on for only small portions of rather than the whole thing, as that would only drive me further to insanity and depression and madness.

Day 6: Watched a bunch of videos on Cam’s YouTube channel. Found a lot of them that were relevant to the situation I’m currently in – including questions I had that he addressed. They are really helpful. I did a bit of studying and some other usual stuff at this point that I’ve talked about in previous entries, so I have that going for me. It’s all about keeping the habit. Speaking of which, I am in the middle of reading The Powers of Habit, although I’m still just at the beginning. But I’m enjoying it so far. It definitely got me thinking about so many of the things we often do that we don’t even realize, even the small things (like how a habit of eating McDonald’s is generated from just one choice, and how easy these habits can be broken by one minuscule change in the environment on the surface). It goes to show how we think we may be in control of ourselves and what we do, but that isn’t exactly the case. My parents will be on vacation soon (a couple of weeks from now) for about a week, so I’ll be the only one alone in the house. This will give me some time to start a couple of personal projects that I’ve had in mind geared towards my self-development, such as cooking. (Another goal of mine, much like everyone else’s goal as a functioning member of society, is to take responsibility for myself, especially if I want to have any chance of moving out soon and to progress towards other long-term goals.) So in that case I’ll just defer those to that time frame for now. But I’ve also doing other things as well now that I have quite a bit of free time on my hands (such as what I’ve described thus far in my journal), so it’s not been too bad so far and it keeps my mind going rather than become stagnant and possibly wallowing in depression, as I will sometimes experience under such situations when I have nothing to do but overthink about my situation. That's something I may look to address in other future journal entries if it does come, though I'll also make sure not to ramble too much about it. (On a side-note, The Slight Edge itself talks about how much your thoughts influence you - and how what you focus on tends to shape your future actions in that sense. Keeping busy by focusing on the things I want to do, rather than on other priorities that will negatively affect me, seems much like a good idea to me at this moment.)

Day 5: Been dealing with some familial issues, which I won’t get into too much detail about. I will tell you that they do involve my grandmother who has dementia (in the early stages, but it does seem to be rapidly progressing and getting worse). I hadn’t seen her in a couple of weeks, so I figured why not visit her and help her with some stuff and etc. On a side-note, I can only hope that should I ever live that far that I can remain healthy for as long as possible. It really, really sucks to see these kinds of things in person and it is kind of a big fear of mine to suddenly lose your functioning and all of your being, which often tends to be the case for those who fall into such a category. Besides that, things have been alright so far. I just finished The Slight Edge. I don’t have a lot to add that I haven’t already learned (besides just in general the idea that what you think influences your actions which in turn is what you get as a result). It may be one of those books to come back to when I may need it as a refresher, just in case there’s another rut in my life and I forget some of these principles. I also found a PDF online of The Power of Habit, so I’ve also begun reading that as well since that also seems to be a favorite of this forum too. Now that I’ve set up a routine for exercise, I’ve also been trying to follow this guide for stretching. Technically I’ve been trying to follow this guide for the past week or so, and I’ve been able to follow the routine on some days, but I haven’t kept up a consistent habit of doing this every day as recommended. It is somewhat time consuming… but given my lack of natural athleticism and physical flexibility, I want to start working on this soon.

Welcome!

Yeah, there are definitely issues with the book, but that doesn’t mean that the book is terrible or that it isn’t insightful, however. In fact many passages of the book are pretty good. Day 4: Some insightful things I have learned from reading The Slight Edge: - Consistency of habit is important to success - There will be tasks you will have to do that on the surface may be insignificant, but are very important in the long run - Do these tasks and discipline yourself even when nobody is watching - Embrace sadness and the other negative emotions as part of the process in your journey, as that way you will be able to understand happiness (and embrace and appreciate it even more). Same for embracing adversity; that way you will be able to understand how to be a strong person. - The Happiness Advantage – being happy first will allow ourselves to feel more creative and engaged – which leads to better results (and success) - “Anything worth having is worth working and paying a price for.” I’m not done with the book yet as I thought I would be, although I am almost finished with it. It got me thinking a bit about how I got to this point in my life and what I could do to get better. I may be able to squeeze in a bit of time to finish the rest after I post this journal update. Besides reading this book, I also did another run today (aiming to do this for at least half an hour per day which I have been doing). I’m surfing the Internet still but I’m allocating more of my habits towards things that I feel could benefit me. I’m reading the news – but I’m more reading about things that interest me, like science/technology and those advances rather than things like what’s happening in Istanbul, as those are the kinds of events that always tend to happen and are tragic all the same, unfortunately, so reading more about them doesn’t exactly help me in any way I feel like. My cravings for video games are still there sometimes, but they’re starting to fade. I don’t know if it’s because of reading this book or after some constant reevaluation – but it certainly feels like they’re becoming less and less important to me. I don’t meant to sound so philosophical, but largely because out in the real world I’m not just competing with younger folks over things that feel so inconsequential (I guess you can say) to my survival and my being. Instead, I’m living in a world with everyone else where a lot of other things feel much, much more grand in scope and important. Achievements in a game where the developers of the game can easily bend the rules to their will isn’t something that I feel so comfortable about, now that I think about it. Also, outside of the game these achievements have no relevance. (For example, I’m not much of an FPS gamer… so I’m not going to be able to follow nor understand the importance of certain game achievements or rankings in said games when I don’t even understand them as a whole in the first place. This goes for everyone else who doesn’t play many video games in general – and there are a LOT of them, why should they care about the importance of something you did in a game?) Therefore, in doing so, those achievements are diminished in regards to their importance. Life in many ways is already a long game, one in which nobody has that same level of control.

Day 3: Well, after a quick Google search I found a PDF of The Slight Edge, although I know @WorkInProgress posted the link (thanks, by the way). I don’t know how I didn’t do that search earlier, I just kind of assumed it. After all that was an opportunity right there that I could’ve just taken advantage of. (Although technically speaking it might also be illegal, which is why I didn’t bother, but regardless... I do recall watching a video where there was a lady walking into a car dealership who had responded to an advertisement on the local newspaper which promised a free brand new BMW to the first person who just came in and signed up. Most people just tend to gloss over those things. I’ll have to find that one sometime… but it serves as a reminder for all the opportunities that we miss especially when we aren’t quite looking for them.) I’m only a quarter through the book. While I found the introduction to be somewhat judgmental of the characters he was describing even if only for his own reasons (because I say there are many, many factors that could explain why someone like the lady shining his shoes isn’t in the same position as him that he didn’t really address)… so far I’m liking the book. I never really thought about how the events of life can transpire and affect your future in a compound interest kind of way. That’s a really interesting insight. I hope to finish the book by tomorrow when I can. I also did a lot of studying for school and also went to another class today. I also witnessed another person sitting next to me who had been playing some Tetris and other video games throughout the entire lecture. I bet he could use this website. =P Fortunately I wasn’t so distracted by it and I could continue listening to the professor. Admittedly I’ve never been the type to get distracted by all sorts of things around me when it comes to tasks that I’m in the middle of doing, listening to lectures included. (Although when it comes to leisure and recreational time for video games, it becomes a whole other story.) Anyways, I’ve been quite busy today. I haven’t really spent as much time idling around on the Internet. I’m also pretty tired too, which I guess is a good sign that I’ve done something at the end of the day. I hope this trend will continue further down the line.

Day 2: Went for a run earlier today. I still have cravings to play video games. I’m still kind of trying to reconcile with the fact that I have so much free time that I’m wasting on the Internet still, even if I’m not playing any games. I still continue to look at gaming forums on occasion. It does seem like other people on this forum have had the same issues too (from reading others’ journals), so this doesn’t seem to be anything new. That means I would also have to make a conscious effort to not be on the Internet so much, while at the same time also work towards my goals. Exercise helps a lot in that regard too. My mood has changed dramatically during the past week ever since I’ve been doing it. Been looking into more of the forum. Started reading a few of the longer journals (not everything, but bits and pieces given the amount of time I can only have in a day), as I feel like that big picture and that longer progression over time will give me an idea of what to expect in the future. At this point I’m somewhat aware of a lot of the self-help stuff (like zenhabits which I’ve read a lot in the past, as well as The Power of Habit, which I might also look into as well). I do however want to look at other books that are not just about self-development or self-help, as I also have that tendency to use them as a crutch to sometimes escape my problems too (kind of like the idea of reading a book about procrastination in order to procrastinate even further). (Also, by putting my thoughts and everything out there I can at least hold myself accountable in some way, even though I could lie to myself and say that everything is all fine and dandy which the Internet can make it easy to do. But regardless.) I’ve looked into some books that I want to get, at least starting tomorrow. Since I’m missing the fundamentals for cooking, it does seem like the 4 Hour Chef looks good (and the Slight Edge, if I can find that book somewhere or else I might have to order it online and wait), though there are some resources online for beginners that I might also try out. I’ve also heard about books like The Food Lab which I’m also into as it talks a lot more about the science and theory behind cooking. That might be for later though. Admittedly, I did not do as much studying as I would have liked, although I did some review of the things I’ve learned from last class. I go to a school that is a bit more intensive with studying in that regard (and where class averages are not inflated, and thus are quite low), which was a conscious decision on my part to instil some kind of discipline and direction in my life. I kind of identify with Cam when he talked about using gaming as a way to escape from the burden of studying (in his recent story that he had posted). Maybe that’s something I need to work on. I’ve also looked into the social skills guide presented on I Will Teach You To Be Rich alongside a few other resources. I do wish I had known about this stuff earlier, as so far I'm finding them very helpful (and hopefully in the future I don't back out of any commitments towards working on myself on the social end of things). Anyways, if you made it this far in I thank you for reading. I’m going to continue reading more on some of these things and will try to implement them into my daily life.

To @jesusboy77: The first part of that reminds me a lot of what this guy is saying in this video (when your thoughts come and go like waves at its peaks and troughs): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPlG_w40qOE Anyways, I will be sure to look further into that as well as the other suggestions. Some of the exercises I've been doing do involve some yoga (like the wide squat pose, for instance). Martial arts is interesting, but learning that will be quite a big undertaking when there's other things I want to do as well. I've seen your introductory post here, and I too wish you good luck in your endeavors.