DanielG

Friday's journal on Saturday morning. Work went alright. Since it was slow, they let me go home early. I had a coffee at Starbucks while I was waiting for the bus. One of the baristas messed up an order, so they offered me a free drink, which I accepted. It was a tasty juice-like thing. When I got home, I helped my mom move some clay. It was definitely easier than I thought it would be, I think the strength training is starting to yield some results. When I finished helping my mom, I hopped on my bike and headed over to my cousin's again. I made a stop at the bike shop to set up an appointment to get my bike tuned up. This time, we had takeout at my cousin's place. YEG Burger, pretty delicious hamburgers. I had two Go2 burgers and shared some fries. I also brought over some inari sushi that my mom had made (a traditional sushi of vinegared rice tucked inside sweet and salty deep-fried tofu pockets). Once the kids were in bed, we watched a bunch of anime. Pretty chill night. One Thing That Went Well Today: Work went well. Gratitude: I am grateful for waking up in the mornings. There's something gratifying about waking up when the sun's coming up. I am grateful for the opportunity to help my mom today. It was something she definitely wouldn't have been able to do on her own. I am grateful for the self-awareness I have. There were a few moments during the day where I caught myself in some negative thought patterns, and I adjusted accordingly when I noticed them. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yep.

Thursday's journal on Friday morning. Work went alright. It was busier than last week on Thursday. I was feeling a bit off, maybe from being tired. I burned my hand a bit, not too bad thankfully. When a bunch of bills come in at the same time I still find it overwhelming, but I feel like I'm steadily progressing. I had a BLT and fries for lunch, which tasted decent enough. After getting a ride back from work, I biked over to my cousin's place. I had fun playing with the kids on the trampoline. I also made a salad, similar to the one I made last week, except this time I made the crispy tortilla strips I wanted to. My cousin made her lasagna, which was amazing as always. I didn't have much time to stick around, since I had salsa dancing lessons, so I basically wolfed down the food and took off. Salsa dancing went okay. By the end of the day, my brain was frazzled, so things weren't sticking/I was having trouble following along, which was okay. I had already been off since the morning, so it made sense that I would have some trouble. I still enjoyed myself, and did my best to participate in class. One girl I danced with insisted on basically leading instead of following, off-timing, which was kind of hilarious to me. At least, it seemed really off-beat and off-timing. Ah well! Maybe I was just tired. End of the day, I had fun. One Thing That Went Well Today: The salad turned out pretty good! Gratitude: I am grateful for where I'm at in life. Even though the transition to working has been tiring, I think it's cool that it's happening. I am grateful for my compassion towards myself when I make mistakes. It's not always there, but when I practice being gentle with myself, it feels good. I am grateful for my bike. It's a fun way to exercise and get around. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yep.

Yesterday's journal, today! It's likely the new standard going forward. Wednesday was also alright. Work went okay, the kitchen got compliments on the steaks we cooked which felt nice. The person training me a rundown of how I'm going to be closing/opening the kitchen later on, so hopefully I remember that. I still had to wait for the filling to set, so I didn't eat anything at work. The timing for the bus wasn't nearly as nice as when my shift is half an hour earlier, but that's fine. The bus ride itself was fairly uneventful. After work, I packed up my gym clothes and a book (in case the mood struck me) and walked to Iconoclast, the coffee shop, for the first time in a while. I had an iced Americano since it was decently hot. It still is really good coffee! I just people watched for the most part. After my coffee, I walked over to the gym. It was later in the day than I normally go, and it was quite busy. Still, since I'm mostly using machines and dumbbells, I had no issue waiting for equipment. Workout complete, I walked towards the grocery store, stopping through the nice public church grounds on the way. I picked up a couple pork chops and some cottage cheese. I used to work at the store, and I think one of the employees recognized me when I went to check out and averted his gaze lol. It didn't bother me, I just found it amusing. Groceries packed away, I headed towards home. On a whim, I decided to buy some deep fried pickles to go from a local eatery. They didn't last the trip home, since I didn't want them to get soggy. They were really good! When I got home, I seasoned the pork chops and fried them up. I saved one of them for later. I also had some salad with cottage cheese. It was pretty good. I bought a bike tire on Tuesday for my pedal bike, intended to replace my 9 year old tire I had on it. I decided that I would put that on and take the bike out for a test run. It worked great! The bike ran pretty smooth. I still need to bring it in to the bike shop for a tune-up. The wheels probably need to be trued, and the rear brake cable is frayed to the point where it probably needs to be tightened or replaced. One Thing That Went Well Today: The bike tire fit! Gratitude: I am grateful for bike tire irons. They make putting on a bike tire WAY easier. I am grateful for the consistency I've had with my fitness/weight loss journey. I am glad the occasional setback does not hearten me to the point of quitting. I am grateful for coffee. Boy howdy I've needed it these past two weeks. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yep.

Madness! 😛 I feel ya on the bit of guilt around not journaling as consistently. I think I might be switching up how I do my journals to compensate for this new schedule I'm on. Also, belated congrats on 60 days!

The trend continues, lol. I'm writing yesterday's journal before work in the morning. Tuesday was alright. Work went okay. After work, I went to the dentist to get a filling done, got my bike wheel fixed, and popped over to Costco with my mom. After that, I went to bed real early. I can't eat until 3:30pm today or I'll wreck the filling 😅 I'm finding it odd that I have energy to do most things during the day, but the quiet reflective time, like this journal, seems to be falling to the wayside. Maybe today I'll make a more concerted effort to take some time aside to meditate/journal. I think it's important to spend the time with myself. One Thing That Went Well Today: The bike wheel is trued to perfection 😄 Gratitude: I am grateful for inspiring music. I am grateful for beautiful language. I am grateful for the serenity I have around my life. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yep.

Saturday + Sunday were alright. I didn't do much Saturday, Sunday I attended the morning men's meeting on Zoom, my homegroup at 12:30, and went for a couple bike rides. I also made an appointment to tune up the e-bike. Monday I had a good day at work, went to the gym, and went to the eye doctor to update my prescription. I ordered a new pair of glasses and some trial contact lenses as well. I haven't made too much time for these journals, I'm writing this one out before getting ready for work today. Mostly just tired by the time I usually write them. One Thing That Went Well Today: Work was alright. Gratitude: I am grateful for the good spatula at work. It makes flipping eggs easier. I am grateful for moments of relaxation. It's nice to recharge. I am grateful for the patience of my co-workers. A lot of them are encouraging and reassuring. 2 Hours of Productivity: On Monday, yeah.

Work today was good. It was a bit busy in the early part of the morning, luckily the cook training me was around to help me out. I was fasting for some blood work I wanted to get done today, so it was a bit of a struggle without caffeine. After work, I had a nap. Then, I went to get the blood work done and had a coffee with my mom. The rest of the day I spent hanging out at my friend's place. We cooked dinner together! Pork chops done in a cast iron skillet, with a nice dry rub and basted in butter. We had caramelized onions and apples to accompany the meat. For sides, we had some coleslaw, corn on the cob, and garlic bread another one of our friends made. It turned out pretty good! We watched anime after dinner. One Thing That Went Well Today: Dinner turned out good 😊 Gratitude: I am grateful for the people willing to help me out. It feels nice when someone has your back. I am grateful for empathy. It helps a lot when people consider where other people are coming from. I am grateful for anime nights with my friends. It's a relaxing and chill way of hanging out with people. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

Work's coming along nicely. I had a good workout today. I made a nice kale salad with some fresh kale from the market to help with dinner. The first Salsa dancing lesson was a success. All in all, a good day. I am tired, so time for bed lol One Thing That Went Well Today: Salsa dancing was fun! Gratitude: I am grateful for water. Always. I am grateful for positive people. It's pretty awesome when you vibe with them. I am grateful for the healthy habits that I'm developing. I find it gratifying to engage in things that are good for me these days. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

I'm going to keep this short to get to bed early. Work was good, settling in more each day. No real big ups or downs, just some flurries of bills that I got help with. I went out to a breakfast place for fun after work, the food was pretty tasty. After that, I went on a long bike ride through the river valley. When I got back home, I folded my laundry and chilled before my appointment with Cam. That also went well, came up with a few things to work on moving forward: getting my license back, figuring out the red seal stuff, and signing up for Salsa dancing lessons. One Thing That Went Well Today: I remembered a phone number completely (short term memory is coming back, it's been bad for a while) Gratitude: I am grateful for cottage cheese. Low calorie, high protein, and delicious. I think I already had this once, but it's still good. I am grateful for the kindness my co-workers have shown me. It's been nice having encouraging people at work. I am grateful for suggestions. I'm a typical alcoholic: tell me what to do, I'll probably resist it. Less so these days though, I think. Regardless, I appreciate when things are put forward as suggestions instead of orders. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

Day two of job, and 60 days of no games! I managed to get most of my morning routine in. I read my readings, prayed, had a coffee, showered, and brushed my teeth. No walk though, but I think that would be a bit ambitious given how early I start. I got another ride today from my mom. She said she's willing to give me rides for these early shifts whenever she's free, and that she feels rested when she goes back to sleep for a bit when she gets back home. Not a big deal. Other than a brief hectic period where 4 people were watching me intently as I cooked, which felt vulnerable and scary, I had another good day at work. I forgot to put green onions in the hashbrowns, and when I did I put the onions on it was too many of them, right when the manager of the entire hotel was watching 😅. He chastised me for it, which felt bad. The lady who was training me said I did well, though. I just need a bit of time to get up to the speed they want; they're pretty happy with the quality of food I'm putting out. I took the bus back home, which conveniently came around the time I got off work. When I got home, I changed out of my work clothes and set out for the gym. On the way, I ran into my neighbour from down the road Milly and her dog, Molly. As always, we had a pleasant conversation. We said goodbye and I made my way to the gym. The workout itself was pretty good. I opted to skip some of the leg stuff since I was planning on a length bike ride after, and have work tomorrow. I had brief friendly conversations with some of the staff before I left. Back home again, for a bit anyway. I hung out with some friends on Discord for a bit before getting a phone call from my dad. He's going to be buying my gaming rig as his home desktop for internet browsing and other productivity stuff. Well, it's going to be put toward a "down payment" for a vehicle he would be selling to me. Since the parts are pretty new, I suggested half their retail value as a reasonable amount to be put toward the truck. He did the dad thing and said he'd value them at 3/4 of their retail price instead. He said whenever I'm ready and have time we can get the ball rolling on both selling the truck to me and giving him the computer/setting it up. After the phone call, and saying goodbye to my friends, I hopped on the e-bike and went on an hour-long ride through the river valley. It was much busier today since I went at like, peak hours for a weekday. Still, it was a good ride. When I got back, I made myself a salad with some chicken and ate it as I'm writing this out. Part of me wants to add more reflective stuff, since it's an early milestone for quitting games. I wrote a little message on the #success-stories channel on the Discord. This time I won't erase it after 10 minutes, lol. I always have a hard time celebrating things going well in my life. I think it stems from a fear of becoming egotistical, and probably past experiences sharing good news with people being met with indifference. I was also leery of making a message or sharing the milestone so that I wouldn't 'jinx it', or get complacent. Part of it is self-worth, too. It's definitely improved from where I came from, but I can still go to a place where I feel unworthy of love, attention, affection etc. I want to stay vigilant that I don't latch onto something else as a way of coping with things. As someone who has been addicted to two different things now, I fervently believe that, if I'm not careful, I can get addicted to all sorts of shit. When I first sobered up, I didn't have access to video games and things went really well. I wasn't as mature, and much more intensive work in regards to my mental health and sobriety was being done then as opposed to now, but it felt more or less similar to how things are going at present. Things kind of got derailed a few times when I got access to video games. I wasn't ready to commit to giving them up then. Today I am 😄. One Thing That Went Well Today: 60 days no games! Gratitude: I am grateful for my progress in weight loss. It's gratifying to watch the number go down. I am grateful for my bed. It's a comfortable place to sleep. I am grateful for my growing ability to process emotions. Today I had an experience with stress, vulnerability, and fear, and I didn't die 😆 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

Speaking of writing out my thoughts, I figure I'll write the journal entry early today. It was my first day at my new job! I caught a ride with my mom early in the morning, and met my immediate supervisor/kitchen manager, Bobby. My first impressions are that she's a really chill lady who is good at her job, which should be good! Everyone was quite friendly and welcoming, which was also reassuring. The work itself was fairly typical. I was a bit nervous going in, and I'm definitely rusty, but I held my own for the most part. I didn't break any egg yolks which was nice, I was a bit worried about that. It felt pretty comfortable and familiar working in a kitchen again. After my shift, I bought some bus tickets and caught another ride home. I went on a bike ride through the river valley to exercise/chill. It was quite peaceful as there were not too many people about. I also put my laundry through the wash, went on a short walk, and emailed the personal trainer from before to see about starting up some sessions. I made myself a nice salad for dinner too. I had a bit of anxiety on my walk, which hasn't happened in a while. Just worrying about keeping the job, if I'll screw up this quitting games thing, stuff like that. I somehow remembered to say a quick prayer and the anxiety subsided, replaced with a more grounded awareness of my surroundings. One Thing That Went Well Today: The first day of work was a success! Gratitude: I am grateful for sharp knives. You definitely miss them when you use a dull one 😅 I am grateful for the people at my new job. Everyone was warm and welcoming, which helped me settle in today. I am grateful for where I'm at. Things have definitely improved a lot. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

Just a self-deprecating way of saying "writing out my thoughts". 😛

Maybe? I'm not sure. It was interesting; he said the topic had come up a lot recently for him, with a bunch of different people. And yeah, they're still functional thanks to a more rugged patchjob we did with glue when we went back to my buddy's place. I think I'm still going to get a new pair, update the prescription at the same time.

A good day today 😄 I went about my regular morning routine to prepare myself for the day ahead when I woke up. I chatted a bunch with someone I met on the Healthy Gamer Discord about spirituality. He seemed resistant to considering the belief in something greater than himself. Just, subtle stuff, like his mind was closing on the idea of it. It's not like I was expecting him to suddenly adopt spirituality, nor was I trying to convince him he should, but it was still interesting to see the inconsistency between his professed open-mindedness and how he was actually reacting to someone sharing their experience with spirituality. After that, I had my homegroup meeting. I opted to attend virtually today. I liked the meeting, lots of messages I could relate to. Not long after my friend picked me up for soccer. Soccer was quite fun. I also got hit in the face with the ball, which broke my glasses. I played a little bit after that happened, but opted to sit out when the patchjob my friend did to fix them came apart. One of the players also got super angry and nearly fought some people after he was tackled from behind. He got kicked out. When we finished soccer, we went to my friend's place for nachos. His wife made them; they were really delicious! Homemade pico de gallo, guac, and queso dip too! I got a ride back home and now I'm writing this out. I'm feeling pretty tired, soccer kind of wiped me out, plus I'm cutting back on coffee. One Thing That Went Well Today: Soccer was fun! Gratitude: I am grateful for my homegroup. It's a solid group of folks. I am grateful for soccer group. Aside from the one guy, they were all really positive and fun to play with. I am grateful for the hospitality my friend and his wife showed me today. It was nice sharing a meal with them 😊 2 Hours of Productivity: Not today.

From the sounds of it, the job will be highly collaborative with other departments; if I'm not busy in the kitchen, I'll be helping maintenance or something like that. I'm optimistic, all the people seemed pretty nice when they gave me a quick tour of the kitchen.

Late night journal 🌙 Lots of walking/biking today. And lots of socializing. Soccer tomorrow! And time for bed for me. I might come back and edit this a bit. One Thing That Went Well Today: Socializing was fun! Gratitude: I am grateful for opportunities to be of service. I am grateful for the people in my life who make me feel uplifted when we have interactions. I am grateful for cycling. It's a fun activity. I enjoy the sense of speed you get while still being able to appreciate your surroundings. 2 Hours of Productivity: Picked up my work pants

This morning was fairly relaxed. I wasn't overly concerned about the job interview, and I did my usual routine. I also went on a bike ride through the river valley on the e-bike. There weren't too many people out this morning so it was a nice, quiet ride for the most part. The interview itself went well. She didn't ask me many questions and essentially offered me the job on the spot, which was great. The job is at a hotel in St. Albert, a smaller municipality(?) just to the North-West of Edmonton. It's roughly a 45-50 minute commute by bus/bike, or 15 minutes by car. She gave me a quick tour of the kitchen and laid out some of what to expect working there. I accepted the position and I start on Monday! When I got back from the interview, I laid down in bed and passed out for a while. I was pretty zonked; I think this sickness is still doing a number on me. My mom woke me up to take me shopping for work clothes and shoes. We found some without too much difficulty. The pair of shoes I wanted originally didn't have the two of the right sized shoe for me. As in, the box with my size had mismatched shoes, and we couldn't find the missing one that would fit me. It was okay though, they had another shoe that can serve just as well, it just has laces instead of being a slip-on. When we got back, we went out to celebrate at a neighbourhood parking lot that serves as a food spot. There were two food trucks, a food shack, and the Pink Shack, which serves ice cream. We decided to try out all three of the hot food spots; I ordered a Vietnamese sub, my mom ordered some sushi, and my mom's boyfriend ordered some fish and chips. They were all delicious! We opted for ice cream at home. After we ate, we ran into our friendly neighbour from down the street, Milly. She was having a bad day, but she was still quite pleasant to hang out with and talk to. I didn't get too close and opted to not visit in her house, since I was still feeling a teeny bit sick and didn't want to risk getting her sick. I still opted to go for my workout at the gym, though. There were like 3-4 other people who were coughing more than I was, so I didn't feel too bad. I think there's something going around the city maybe. The workout itself was good, I'm still using the Copilot app while I have the free trial. I walked back from the gym, and now I'm writing this out. One Thing That Went Well Today: I got a job today!😊 Gratitude: I am grateful for ice cold water. It returns again! It's still awesome after a long day. I am grateful for my body. When I treat it well, it works well! I am grateful for this new opportunity with work. I am glad they hired me. 2 Hours of Productivity: Sort of. Shopping for work stuff + interview.

Another sick day. It was markedly better than yesterday, though, symptom-wise. I did my morning routine without the coffee, and then went for a walk. I ended up having a two cups of coffee during the day, though. I'm not sure I'll keep up with the whim of no coffee. Cutting back does seem like a good idea, though. I did a bunch of cardio today, an 'exercise' bike ride through the river valley and then commuting to my cousin's place and back. I opted to skip my strength training since I was still feeling sick. Also, I got an email from a place and scheduled an interview for tomorrow at noon. To keep up the streak, I applied to a couple jobs as well. The bulk of the latter half of today was spent socializing with some of my friends who were also sick already with the same thing, I believe. I suspect I'm the one who spread it to them :(. My mom's boyfriend got sick today too. I messed with my friends a bit today and we had a good laugh around it. Good-natured teasing kind of thing. It's late and I can't think of much else to write. Good night 😄 One Thing That Went Well Today: I have an interview for tomorrow 😊 Gratitude: I am grateful for all the different fitness tracking apps. It's cool that people came up with these interesting ways of plotting data. I am grateful for people's recommendations for things. It's a neat way to learn about new stuff and connect with people. I am grateful for anime. It's one of my preferred mediums for enjoying stories. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

I'm writing yesterday's journal this morning. I was tired and decided to call it an early night. I got up early, after a little less than four hours of sleep, and decided I was going to cut down my coffee intake to zero on a whim. I was (and still am) feeling sick with a cough. So, I didn't brew my morning pot, otherwise my other activities were my usual routine. My morning walk was good, loosened me up a bit since I was sore from my workout the day before. I also spent some time reading the Michael Singer book. When my mom got up, we took the dog out for a walk together. Her boyfriend had gone to the nature preserve he helps manage to meet with some weed sprayers. We had a nice walk together, and had a small disagreement about the nature of video games. I heard 'video games are all bad and cause depression', and we eventually worked it out that she meant to convey that 'for some people, video games become an addiction and that, for them, it can cause a lot of different problems, including depression'. After our walk, I had a nap. Upon awakening, I decided to go for a bike ride, since it was nice outside. I took the usual longer route through the river valley I like to do, but this time with my regular bike (instead of the e-bike). I handled the hills decently well, which was a gratifying moment. It felt like some of my work getting back into shape was paying off. The river valley was beautiful as always, and there weren't too many people about since it was in the middle of the day on a weekday. After the bike ride, I applied to some more jobs online. The well of jobs posted on Indeed for line cook positions is getting a bit dryer since I've put a bunch in, so I'm branching out to other platforms. I went for another walk after, just a short one around the block. A guy who attends my AA homegroup fairly regularly had suggested an online meeting to attend on Wednesdays, so I made the time to go. It was a good meeting, heavily focused on the Big Book. Once that completed, I had a meeting with Cam. We also had a good meeting, spoke at length about a couple different topics, and had our regular check-in as to how I'm doing in different aspects of my life. I went straight to bed after the meeting. One Thing That Went Well Today: I had a healthy disagreement/conflict with my mom that didn't blow up into something crazy. Gratitude: I am grateful for tissue paper. It's nice to be able to blow my nose in comfort. I am grateful for my Bluetooth/USB speaker. I appreciate having the option to listen to music wherever. I am grateful for my breath. It gives me life, and can be an excellent grounding focus for when I meditate. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

To me, it sounds like you were startled and felt threatened, and so reacted according to those emotions. You were already feeling vulnerable and he overstepped a physical boundary suddenly and without warning; by most conventions, not a socially acceptable thing to do. In my opinion, you acted in a very relatable, very normal way for a person to do. I can understand the embarrassment or even guilt around how you acted. From how you write out your journals you strike me as a conscientious and agreeable person, so it makes good sense that you would feel badly about the situation. I get the need to apologize for taking up people's time. For a long time, taking up space, especially since I spent a lot of time not doing that, felt like I was overstepping people's boundaries. Also, I felt like I wasn't worthy of being vulnerable in that way with people. You're allowed to take up space, too. Especially in a place designed for self-reflection, like your own journal thread. If people don't have the time to read, they won't. The rest of us who are more invested in getting to know you and see how you're doing will take the time to check-in.

I spent a decent chunk of time on the computer today. I got in my productivity hours by putting in some job applications and scouting out the volunteering scheduling system for Habitat for Humanity, the charity I'm looking to volunteer with. The rest of it was spent going through my dad's old digital camera photos. I shared a bunch with my friends and we got a good kick out of some of them (carefully curated by me, of course). Also, it was nice to see pictures of some of the people who shaped my life who have since passed (my grandparents and some of my great aunts/uncles). I also put in a lot of physical activity today. I completed my Copilot scheduled workout (the personal training app that I'm testing out via the free trial). I had to adapt some of the exercises since I decided to work out at home. I wasn't feeling well and didn't want to spread my germs to the gym people. I nearly cracked 30k steps again today, and was just shy of 20km total distance walked. Part of me wanted to be a completionist and keep walking, but I figured since I've been feeling sick I won't push it. And I think the parallels between that and how video games are designed to keep you pushing/hooked makes me a bit leery of engaging in achievement hunting for fitness. As long as I'm doing it and keeping healthy, I think that's what's important for me at the moment. I also was decently social today. I ran into and consciously took the initiative to talk to two people I would consider acquaintances. One was someone I knew from AA, and the other was our neighbour from a few doors down. In both instances, we ended up having good conversations and I left feeling uplifted from our encounter. I got to learn a bit more about them as well, which was cool. All in all, a good day. I snagged a photo of the river today, since I thought it looked beautiful tonight. The picture doesn't really do it justice, but I'll include it anyway. One Thing That Went Well Today: I was sick today, but I still managed to do a bunch of stuff! 😃 Gratitude: I am grateful for my dad's inclination for photography. It was nostalgic and fun going through the photos he took. I am grateful for coffee. It helped me power through today. I am grateful for random encounters with people. It really brightens the day when I get to speak with people on the street. 😊 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

Welcome davidthedad! If you're looking for things to do other than gaming, there's a nifty hobby tool on the main Game Quitters website that can help you narrow down some options. I think you're in the right place if you're looking to detox from gaming. I myself am still new to quitting games, a little past the halfway point for 90 days. I'm committed to fully quit gaming though, I've sold/gave away a bunch of my stuff. I think for me, I need to treat it similarly to my alcoholism: I've abused games to the point where I can no longer safely enjoy the privilege of them. Feel free to shoot me a message whenever!

Today was a big socialization day. I spent pretty well the entire day with some friends. We went for brunch and then hung out at my cousin's house for the rest of the day. At around 5 I had a quick Zoom call with my improv coach, who gave me some positive feedback. She said that I was really good at supporting people, both onstage and off, and that it was cool to see how I grew throughout the workshops week to week. She said I am ready for level 2 of the workshops if I wanted, which is exciting! The workshop members and I had made a loose plan to do level 2 together in the fall, so we'll see how that goes. One Thing That Went Well Today: I got some positive feedback from the improv coach 😃 Gratitude: I am grateful for being present during my cousin's kids toddler years. It's been a delight and an honour to share some of the precious moments of their childhood. I am grateful for the people who made my food today. A lot of time, care, and effort goes into making the things I eat, I am glad that there are people who are willing to do those things. I am grateful for my daily reflections books. They help set the tone for the day. 2 Hours of Productivity: Not today.

Another good day. Great meeting today at the homegroup, lots of impactful messages of experience, strength, and hope. I also got to hang out with a friend, shared a meal and kicked a soccer ball around. I snuck in some exercise as well as some applications for jobs as well, all in all a good day. Crept near my calorie limit though, with not as much protein as I would've liked. Ah well. I'm not feeling as motivated to write out a whole speel today. Though I'm writing stuff out now to reflect on things, so we'll see how long it ends up being 😆. I'm really putting effort into life these days, and I feel like I'm doing a good job of not being attached to the outcome. Like with these jobs, for instance. I think old me would've taken to heart the rejection of not getting a position. As is, I still feel that it was a bit of a dick move to say "We'll contact you and give you a decisive answer on Thursday", and then never get back to me. One Thing That Went Well Today: Michael and I had a good time hanging out today 😊 Gratitude: I am grateful for my new shoes. They worked really well for kicking the soccer ball around today! I am grateful for the messages people shared at the meeting today. They really resonated with me and reminded me of where I've come from and what I still need to do on a daily basis. I am grateful for my willingness to sometimes lean into discomfort. It's cool to see the growth in myself. 2 Hours of Productivity: Yes!

I'm not sure if this is a rhetorical question or if you're asking people's opinions. I'm going to go with the latter so I can respond 😛. Intimacy is a rewarding part of life. In its literal definition, it's not limited to just a 'romantic' partner, you can have that same closeness and companionship with other people. For me, I have patterns of behaviour that sabotage intimacy, more specifically I close up and become emotionally unavailable at times. Despite that, it's one of the, if not the most, important things I seek in my relationships. As for romantic intimacy, if we treat this like other addictions, the suggestion that floats around 12 Step rooms is to avoid changes in your relationship status for a year. So, if you were married, stay married for a year. If you had a girlfriend/boyfriend, don't break up with them for a year. If you're single, don't date for a year. Of course, tons of people don't follow that suggestion, and a lot of them inevitably end up experiencing some serious emotional upheavals and of those, some relapse. We're around the same amount of time into the detox (I think I'm at 51 days today), so maybe my own experience might help you figure things out. I stepped my toe in for a bit, less full-on committing to trying to find a partner and more testing to see how I'd handle the emotions around it. It went well for the most part, I had a good conversation with someone on a dating site before being paywalled. I think ultimately it's your decision, bearing in mind that it will likely cause a big emotional reaction if you pursue it. If you feel confident you're in a place where you can handle a lot of strong emotions, and are practicing being more present and aware in your relationships, I'd say it's a realistic thing to try. Good luck, Matt! Feel free to shoot me a message if you want to talk about it more.